King NINTENDO (1577 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: 1.88 on 53 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jesus_Loves_TwEE (View user info) at 2006-03-09 23:33:13 EST
So its that time again, lines must be drawn, Sides must be taken, rhetoric and talking points must be memorized. Armies are forming just over the horizon and this is no time to be sitting on the fence, you're either with us or against us.
Thats right its time for war, NO, not Bush's war against Emmanuel Goldstein and his shadowy minions, no this is serious. So put on your serious face damn you, cause we're talking about a topic so divisive it will tear families apart and turn nerds against geeks. Of course I'm referring to the Console war.
Every half decade or so the big hardware players in the video game industry drag out their latest iterations, and expect, no DEMAND, that you drop your current video game system for their newest souped up offering which it just so happens is being released just in time for the Christmas shopping season. Oh you may resist the urge to upgrade, may even swear off video games, for a while, but soon you'll get the shakes, the fever, the nausea (oh the nausea) and you'll be back forking over your paycheck for another trip into the mushroom kingdom (or to kill another hooker, whatevers your style).
Now this war has been raging for over 30 years, and has left many a widow. In the beginning (or as close as I care to go)companies like Atari, Intellivision and Colecovision battled each other to a standstill with what crude weapons they had (spears, rocks, nukes), they 1up'ed each other with ever more dazzling graphics, one, two, three pixel characters!! MADDNESS!!!
They dared to challenge the gods and payed the price in the great video game crash of 1983 (mayhaps your pappy told you of the legends). The video game scene was reduced to a radioactive wasteland, uninhabitable to all but the most hardiest of nerdlins, the console war was over, or so they thought.
Then from the east there came a mighty rumble, a giant beast awoke, and gazed upon the now barren wasteland before him, stretched his wings, and crowned himself king, the 8-bit era had begun. This beast called himself Nintendo and ruled with an iron fist all through the 8 and 16-bit eras, of coarse others were jealous of Nintendos power and tried to dethrone the king, but only one would come close. SEGA emerged from the shadows and stood before the king unafraid, he issued a challenge, and the prize would be dominion of all the land.
NINTENDO being overly proud would not give its crown up so easily, the two Gaints puffed up their chests, traded blows, and leveled pixilated cities under their massive feet. The fighting was not left to NINTENDO and SEGA alone, for each had an army of devoted fanatics ready to lay down their lives for their chosen Deity, at any point between 1985 and 1995 cries of "Earth worm Jim looks better on the SNES" OR "NO! It looks better on the Genesis" could be heard echoing down the streets.
IN 1988 NINTENDO sought the help of a powerful mechant form the east and together they worked in secret on a weapon to level the competition, this weapon would be a CD-rom add on for the soon to be released SNES and the merchants name was SONY (doo doo doo suspenseful music). They only had a few short months before the SNES would be released and worked tirelessly day and night, and only by moonlight, for added effect. NINTENDO became increasingly suspicious of SONY's intentions and loyalty, for although they were working on a add on for the SNES together, SONY was also working on its own machine that would play SNES games as well as games on CD. NINTENDO seeing this as a potential threat to its Hardware dominance ended their partnership with sony. Enraged, SONY issued a vague threat in typical 80's cartoon villain fashion "I'll get you for this NINTENDO, some day, soooooommmme daaaaaaayy" before jumping into his egg shaped escape pod and blasting off into the night sky. Of course NINTENDO thought nothing of the threat, NINTENDO was king after all, nobody could touch him, not even SEGA.
Swiped this pic from www.jamieson.cc
User Reviews
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-07-28 14:48:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture alone gets +430958347698254
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-07-28 01:34:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KICKASS
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2006-03-28 20:21:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
how can someone born in the early 80s not +2 this???
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2006-03-28 01:28:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for 1 reason and one reason only.
Colecovision
i actually had one of those and want one again. frenzy was the bestus evar.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 20:11:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 19:44:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 19:20:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 18:52:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo is an auto +2. That and Sega were the only video games I ever had and actually used more than once. I had my Nintendo sitting in my closet until I let my cousin borrow it about three years ago. We got in a huge fight and she never returned it. I fucking hate her.
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You mean the original or SNES or 64? If one of the first two go kill the fucknig bitch and take it back you non-nerd. If a 64 who cares? It sucked ass anyways.
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I don't know what the SNES is but I'm assuming it's the Super Nintendo and I've never played a 64. Mine was the original and I think the stupid whore gave it away to her ex-boyfriend! Last I heard, he moved accross the country for school. I had all the cool games, Mario Bros., Tetris, the duck shooting one, Zelda, and others. *cries*
I really hope she was lying and only said this to upset me.
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SNES= Super Nintendo Entertainment System, like I said kill the whore.
Submitted by Jesus_Loves_TwEE (user info) at 2006-03-10 20:10:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah I did end this too abruptly, wasn't really suppose to end there. I was planing on going right up to present day, but it was late while I was writing, and the sandman was calling, figured Nintendo and Sony going their separate ways was a good enough spot to end the story, gave it a sense of foreboding and left it open if I decided to finish it.
I will finish it though, I have yet to make fun of video games staring 50 cent and the people who buy that shit, You know who you are, and shame on you, shame.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 19:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 19:20:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 18:52:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo is an auto +2. That and Sega were the only video games I ever had and actually used more than once. I had my Nintendo sitting in my closet until I let my cousin borrow it about three years ago. We got in a huge fight and she never returned it. I fucking hate her.
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You mean the original or SNES or 64? If one of the first two go kill the fucknig bitch and take it back you non-nerd. If a 64 who cares? It sucked ass anyways.
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I don't know what the SNES is but I'm assuming it's the Super Nintendo and I've never played a 64. Mine was the original and I think the stupid whore gave it away to her ex-boyfriend! Last I heard, he moved accross the country for school. I had all the cool games, Mario Bros., Tetris, the duck shooting one, Zelda, and others. *cries*
I really hope she was lying and only said this to upset me.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 19:20:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 18:52:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo is an auto +2. That and Sega were the only video games I ever had and actually used more than once. I had my Nintendo sitting in my closet until I let my cousin borrow it about three years ago. We got in a huge fight and she never returned it. I fucking hate her.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You mean the original or SNES or 64? If one of the first two go kill the fucknig bitch and take it back you non-nerd. If a 64 who cares? It sucked ass anyways.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-10 18:52:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo is an auto +2. That and Sega were the only video games I ever had and actually used more than once. I had my Nintendo sitting in my closet until I let my cousin borrow it about three years ago. We got in a huge fight and she never returned it. I fucking hate her.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-10 18:32:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
time to break out my Atari 2600
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-03-10 17:26:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The Princess is hot.
Submitted by digdug (user info) at 2006-03-10 17:25:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DIG DUG
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 17:20:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-10 11:16:02 (#)
Ranking: 1
This stopped way too soon. You needed to continue it.
And for those mentioning no good RPGs out, you need to branch out more than just the mainstream titles. XBox has very few good RPGs, but PS2 has a bunch.
Try Tales of Legendia, Dragon Quest VIII, Kingdom Hearts II (will be released March 30th, but will be amazing), or Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. Those are damn good
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All those games pale in comparison to Nintendo games liek Zelda and Mario and The Legend of the Seven Stars (oh how i want to get a copy of the ofr my SNES, I want it so bad).
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-10 17:18:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-03-10 07:42:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
Ninty all the way!
Except...I dont think I could give up Sonic.
Ninty all the way except when Im playing Sonic!
What I'd really like them to do is port a bunch of NES games onto the DS, that would be awesome, playing all the old Marios and Zeldas again.
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TTOM they must teach you nothing in that barbaric land of Scottland, hats what the new Nintedo system will do, you'll be able to play all Nintendo games ever made...ever. Nintendo shall be king again Damn Sony and Microsoft. It's all about Mario, DK, Zelda and Star Fox.
I'm giving all of you a running for the title of King of the Geeks by the way.
Submitted by blueboy (user info) at 2006-03-10 16:01:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Currently I'm taking a history of videogames class, but even without it I would have needed more from this.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-10 15:31:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-10 11:16:02 (#)
Ranking: 1
This stopped way too soon. You needed to continue it.
And for those mentioning no good RPGs out, you need to branch out more than just the mainstream titles. XBox has very few good RPGs, but PS2 has a bunch.
Try Tales of Legendia, Dragon Quest VIII, Kingdom Hearts II (will be released March 30th, but will be amazing), or Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. Those are damn good.
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Everyone talks about how great Kingdom Hearts is. I went to buy it and almost got to the cashier with it but it was too ghey looking. I just couldn't purchase it.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2006-03-10 14:51:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
...and find out when Twilight Princess is going to be released. I was hoping for a holiday season release a few months ago, after two years ago they said mid-late 05.
I can't take all this waiting...
Submitted by weasul (user info) at 2006-03-10 11:16:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This stopped way too soon. You needed to continue it.
And for those mentioning no good RPGs out, you need to branch out more than just the mainstream titles. XBox has very few good RPGs, but PS2 has a bunch.
Try Tales of Legendia, Dragon Quest VIII, Kingdom Hearts II (will be released March 30th, but will be amazing), or Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. Those are damn good.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-03-10 11:01:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
snes
super smash TV
Lemmings
NHL'94
FF III
Zelda:link to the past
I still play it
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:48:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:34:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
+1 post
+1 picture
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:42:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:36:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:25:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo was king, and Nintendo will be king again. The PS3 is going to cost Sony some severe marketshare (most people dont want to drop $500 on a videogame system)
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I would go so far as to say that NO ONE wants to drop $500 on a videogame system. I could easily afford it, and even still, Daaaaamn. $500? I don't know man, it would have to be a whole hell of a lot cooler than the X-box 360, which I haven't played, but from what I've seen, don't impress me much. Yeah, HD is cool (really, really cool) but where's da games at?
Speaking of which, what the hell has happened to RPGs? Am I the only person in the world who doesn't like FPSs? I'm going to need another Final Fantasy X here sometime soon.
Damn it.
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I agree. Good RPG's have dropped off the face of the earth. They are all now on hand held Nintendo systems and they suck.
I am not against a good FPS, but I need more variety in my gaming.
And I figure I'll just buy an X-Box360. It's just as easy. Actually if you look at specs it is supposed to be more powerful than the PS3.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:36:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:25:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo was king, and Nintendo will be king again. The PS3 is going to cost Sony some severe marketshare (most people dont want to drop $500 on a videogame system)
__________________________________________________________________________
I would go so far as to say that NO ONE wants to drop $500 on a videogame system. I could easily afford it, and even still, Daaaaamn. $500? I don't know man, it would have to be a whole hell of a lot cooler than the X-box 360, which I haven't played, but from what I've seen, don't impress me much. Yeah, HD is cool (really, really cool) but where's da games at?
Speaking of which, what the hell has happened to RPGs? Am I the only person in the world who doesn't like FPSs? I'm going to need another Final Fantasy X here sometime soon.
Damn it.
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:25:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nintendo was king, and Nintendo will be king again. The PS3 is going to cost Sony some severe marketshare (most people dont want to drop $500 on a videogame system)
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-03-10 10:16:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Princess is hot, but Mario looks a little lumpy.
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:59:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I went to resurrect my Nintendo the other day and found everything except the console. 3 controllers, all connecting cables, gun, games... no console :(
Submitted by COMountain (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:55:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I know it's a drawing and all, but how is the princess straddling that giant floating brick mass?
Two words: PS3
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:43:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 I can't believe you mentionned Emmanuel Goldstein.
Submitted by Philst82 (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:34:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That is the single most awesome pic ever.
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:13:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-10 09:13:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
love the pic.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-03-10 08:44:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well okay there were quite a few spelling errors in there, but I suppose that has been said before.
As a gamer this was hilarious. And as a Sega fanatic (STILL AM YOU COCK SUCKING BITCHS! FUCK YOU!) it rings with truth.
I never knew about the partnership between Sony and Nintendo for the SNES.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-10 08:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I got a NES when I was in 8th grade, and bought a SNES with money from my part-time job later on during high school. Still have them, and have never bought a newer console system since either. Fuck the PS and XBox hype.
Although, I did get addicted to playing FF7 on a friend's machine in college.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-03-10 08:12:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Emmanuel Goldstein? Enemy of The People?
Allow me to just say, BEST. POST. EVAR.
Now finish the story. And give me the juice on PS3.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-03-10 07:42:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ninty all the way!
Except...I dont think I could give up Sonic.
Ninty all the way except when Im playing Sonic!
What I'd really like them to do is port a bunch of NES games onto the DS, that would be awesome, playing all the old Marios and Zeldas again.
Submitted by xanderd (user info) at 2006-03-10 05:48:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
sorry to break the streak! Good topic but it didnt really go anywhere.
If the pic was drawn by you it would have been a double +2!
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-10 05:34:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what?!?! noob?!?!?! wait! i'm drunk! i don't give a shit!! ahha! enjoy the +2 you sandy fucker asshole!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-10 03:42:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-03-10 03:17:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
picture is cool.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-10 03:38:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 cause that pic is so badass
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-03-10 03:29:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I prefer NESticle for original NES games. Imma whoop all y'ass at Master Blaster!
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-03-10 03:17:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
picture is cool.
Submitted by goose (user info) at 2006-03-10 02:56:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Chapter 2!
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-03-10 02:49:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
All hail ZSNES, for all of my gaming needs.
Donkey Kong Country
Final Fantasy VI
Super Punch Out!
Megaman X
Super Mario World
Street Fighter II Turbo
Street Fighter Alpha II
Aero Fighters
and many more....
Submitted by viciousthawts (user info) at 2006-03-10 02:40:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is so true and all the gamers out there know what he is talking about with the consoles. The battle continues and I am eagerly awaiting the results. Awesome pic too!
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-03-10 02:34:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:57:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
AND THEN???
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Seriously, it did seem to end abruptly.
-Dave
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-03-10 02:10:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
PF2
And I like the pic, too.
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-03-10 01:21:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that was great!
Submitted by Bayley (user info) at 2006-03-10 00:24:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I know where this is going <looks at Gamecube with disgust> but do continue!!!
Submitted by Serious_Melvin (user info) at 2006-03-10 00:10:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Greatest picture I've ever seen.
Submitted by Kale (user info) at 2006-03-10 00:05:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:57:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AND THEN???
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:56:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:45:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good, in a weird sort of way.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-09 23:34:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+1 post
+1 picture