There Is Always One More Song (2134 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: monster
Rating: 1.98 on 49 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stagger Lee (View user info) at 2006-03-11 11:32:45 EST
Part the First: http://www.ubersite.com/m/84896
Part the Second: http://www.ubersite.com/m/84947
Part the Third: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85038
Part the Fourth: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85106
Part the Fifth
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"Wait," I pleaded with the monster. "You cannot leave! You must have so many lifetimes of tales! So much to give to the world! Reconsider, I beg of you. Sit with me a while longer, and share your stories. There must be more burdens for you to lay down."
"Give more?" he hissed, and he leaned down close and I tasted years on his breath. Tasted them, and saw them in his pale, burning eyes. "I am not here to give. This was for my benefit, not yours. You were but a conduit. Tell my tale, by all means, but do not ask for more."
"Still," I said, "There must be more for you to tell. You must have seen so much."
"Of course I have seen much," he said. He seemed exasperated. Exasperated, bordering on rage. I am beginning to understand that his attitude towards me, and mine towards him, reciprocate and feed on each other, expanding together. I felt my hate of him bloom in a most fearsome way in my mind. I felt my right hand clench, almost unwillingly, into a tightly balled fist. "What I have seen is not an issue. The most important events of my life took place shortly after I awakened on that hillside. Nothing since has been of any significance."
"But surely there is more detail than that!" I cried, "What of your other interactions with the world? Has nobody touched you since?"
"If people react with hate and fear, then most times I cannot help but slay them. If they react with indifference, then I can ignore them too. If they react with compassion, or pity, which is rare, then I can sometimes feel kindly towards them. However, sometimes I cannot even feel kindly towards the most innocent and deserving person anymore. I have become jaded."
He turned his back on me then. "Farewell."
I touched his back again. "Wait," I said again.
He turned toward me, and now the rage in his mind surfaced, billowing up from the deeps. I had a brief but unsettling mental image of a white shroud rolling up from the depths of the ocean.
"Silence your flapping tongue before I silence it for you!" he bellowed. This was the first time he had raised his voice to me, and I realised that I was getting but a taste of the fury that the citizens of Tupelo had experienced. I hated him with a clear, unequivocal conviction in that moment.
He turned away for the second time and left. He walked down my hall and slammed the door behind him. I stood there, stunned by his hatred, and by my own. Looking back, I do not know what first triggered my next actions, but minutes passed before I moved.
I ran back through my kitchen and out to my garden shed. I suppose that I must have cut quite a comical figure: an ageing man in a dressing gown and slippers, running in full daylight through his garden. I opened the door, hesitated but a moment, and selected a shovel from the rack on the wall. I ran from the shed without bothering to close the door. I ran around the side of my house.
The monster was walking with his back to me. He was perhaps halfway down my long driveway. He appeared to be limping somewhat. I closed the distance rapidly between us. Incredibly, impossibly, he did not seem to either hear me coming or sense me in his own peculiar way. He simply kept his eyes forward and walked slowly down my driveway.
I swung the shovel without breaking my stride. I caught him in the small of his back. He stumbled, but did not fall. He tried to turn towards me but could not turn toward me before I swung the shovel again, this time striking him on his temple. He fell and hit the ground hard, lying on his face. I brought the shovel down again on his back.
He gave a muffled cry - the first time he had uttered a sound since I attacked him - and attempted to roll over. As he made it over onto his back I struck him in the throat with the blade of the shovel. He emitted a choked, bubbling grunt. Blood welled up over his lips and down his chin. I stared at him, not quite believing what I was seeing, or what I had done. And then, with his mouth filled with his own dying blood, he met my gaze and smiled. It was the most horrific, chilling smile I ever beheld.
That was his last action upon this earth. Those pale, weary eyes closed and he died, after untold years, on my driveway. He died without fanfare, in ignominy. I stood there, leaning on my shovel, panting, staring at his corpse in disbelief. How could he possibly have not detected my intent? How could I have brought him low, with such ease?
I dropped the shovel, with its accusingly bloody blade. I bent and took his body by the feet. I hauled his body back to my garden. I set about the arduous labour of creating a shallow grave for the monster. Once this was accomplished, I said a quiet prayer over his remains and buried him.
I sit here now, in my kitchen, alone. I ponder the events of the last few hours, and I think of the manner in which I dispatched him. I think of how it was too easy. I think of how unjustified it was; certainly, he was a murderer beyond my scope to comprehend, but there had been no thoughts of justice in my mind when I performed my own murder upon him.
Certainly the events have changed me. But they have changed me in a way I cannot define at present. I feel no guilt, at least not yet. I have been waiting, it seems, waiting for the guilt to come upon me. Yet it does not. I am left with merely a feeling of disquiet and uncertainty.
I have crossed a line, and I have looked back to find it gone. What shall I become now?
As it has so many times before, the sun awakens me as it rises above the horizon. I lie on my back, renewed and filled with cold clarity. I see it all. It is the moments of clarity that make it all worthwhile. Soon most of it will fall into the dusty recesses of memory, but for now, all is clear to me.
In one world, I see myself striding the cracked and fading ruins of Carthage, my hands raw and reddened from recent murder.
In another world, I remember swimming downstream in a mighty river, and feeling something close to happiness.
I remember wielding a firearm, a rare occasion, and gunning down a slew of police officers on a rainy, fierce night.
I remember being naked to waist and strangling the life from a man whose only crime was to fear me.
I remember the shovel's blade biting deep into my throat.
I remember worlds upon worlds, killing upon killing, and all the joys and lows of the millennia. It all overwhelms me, in a bittersweet rush and I feel tears spring in my eyes, clean and untainted by any doubt or conflict. I can shed an honest tear for once, in solitude.
I am lying on a hillside once more. Everything must converge. All cycles must repeat. This is the way it goes, and this is the way it always will be. The dawn sun scatters peaceful light upon the land. For now, all is calm and all is the way it should be. Soon, however, my business and my life will become the business of killing, and the life of a killer. This is always the manner of things.
And then, as I survey the peaceful morning landscape, there is music. There is always the music. This time it is a man singing, in a pleasant tenor. Somebody is accompanying him on a simple wooden flute, a sound so haunting and beautiful that I cannot resist another tear.
He sings:
Well baby I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor
You know I used to live alone before I knew you
And I've seen your flag on the marble arch
And love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
Well maybe there is a god above
But all I ever learnt from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
And it's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody that's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
On that note, with the morning sun in my eyes and their song in my ears, I stand. I square my shoulders and head off, toward whatever destiny may await me. And just maybe, I think, as the last of my clarity and memory fade, just maybe redemption will find me. Perhaps this will be the last time.
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Song credit: Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen, as performed by Jeff Buckley.
User Reviews
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-02-19 19:52:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is the one mate.
Very good stuff.
I like it all together.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-21 02:14:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like you, but Orgasmatron does.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-10 00:05:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jack, thank you. Regarding the fridge thing: I think that was in the old man's house, which was in a modern-ish world. All the action related by the monster took place in a medieval sort of setting, but I wanted to keep the same old-style tone throughout, hence giving them both a very formal way of narrating.
Inion, thank you. "I'm glad you do what you do" is possibly the highest compliment you can give anyone with artistic pretentions.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-09 16:40:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a good series, Stagger. There were some choppy parts, but hey, writing for the net is different from writing something you want to sell, and I'm sure that there's a lot of spit and polish you could apply throughout.
The only jarring bit, maybe I'm wrong, is when you mention a 'refrigerator.' I took this to occur in the past... or were you just applying an older more literate style to a modern tale?
Either way I enjoyed it. Sorry I took so fuckin long to get around to reading.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-04-23 16:38:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
visceral ground hog day. i'm glad you write.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-04 03:41:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cheers MyTee and ETS.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-03-22 18:07:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Leonard Cohen.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-03-22 17:43:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<Stands, applauds>
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-17 08:47:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-17 08:12:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
I felt the conclusion was a little rushed but it would be churlish of me to deny you the +2 on that account.
Excellent stuff throughout.
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I know exactly what you mean. It was too short. This one took me the longest to write, by far, yet no matter how much I tried, I just couldn't put any more story into it. This was as long as I cold make it.
Thanks for reading.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-17 08:12:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I felt the conclusion was a little rushed but it would be churlish of me to deny you the +2 on that account.
Excellent stuff throughout.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-03-15 16:17:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-13 18:25:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:34:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU BASTARD AXOLOTL! MY RATING!
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fyi, a 1.99 is considered the best rating around here - any village idiot can get a +2 rating, but a 1.99 takes at least 50 +2s and 1 +1.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-13 15:04:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-11 23:08:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
Good God my alter rules.
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Get your own Orgasmo! Isn't Ghola enough for you?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-13 08:35:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-12 16:22:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"my clone wears a brown shirt
and i seduce him when no-ones around"
Submitted by midwesternknight (user info) at 2006-03-12 00:42:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I was so gonna -2 this with the dishonorable way the monster died, but you pulled it out perfectly, excellent job on the whole series.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 23:35:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks a lot whole lot, everyone.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-11 23:08:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good God my alter rules.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-11 23:08:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I remember worlds upon worlds, killing upon killing, and all the joys and lows of the millennia. It all overwhelms me, in a bittersweet rush and I feel tears spring in my eyes, clean and untainted by any doubt or conflict. I can shed an honest tear for once, in solitude.
---
This got to me.
Great ending to the series. Can't wait to see what you've got coming next.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-03-11 21:13:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Realize this: you have set the bar so high that you will not easily be able to top it.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-11 20:02:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The Jeff Buckley version of that song is worth the +2 alone. God damn. Sends chills down my spine.
You are officially the best n00b of 2006. I don't care if Gabriel Garcia Marquez starts posting tomorrow, you fucking win.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-11 17:40:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:34:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU BASTARD AXOLOTL! MY RATING!
Actually, I'm just happy if you read it. Also that you named me joint best noob of 2006.
-------
who was teh other best noob?
You really are the best noob.
I really need to get off the computer.
Get off the computer ghola.
now.
do it.
no.
i don't want to.
please.
stop.
glah.
glah.
what was i talking about?
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-03-11 17:01:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicely wrapped up and brought full-circle...
I *knew* the old collector of tales was an evil old bastard.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:48:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:25:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice wrap up.
Overall a great series. I hope you are not an alter.
-Dave
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Well he's CERTAINLY NOT MY ALTER. HONEST. Mine would have the grace and dignity to support a fine footballing team. Like West Ham or something.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:34:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU BASTARD AXOLOTL! MY RATING!
Actually, I'm just happy if you read it. Also that you named me joint best noob of 2006.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:27:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Give me a Leonard Cohen afterword
So I can sigh eternally
I sit and drink pennyroyal tea
Distill the life inside of me
I'm a liar and a thief
I'm anemic royalty
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:26:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ferret
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:26:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
emu
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
weep
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:25:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AHH I BROKE THE +2 STREAK
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:25:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice wrap up.
Overall a great series. I hope you are not an alter.
-Dave
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:25:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:00:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just waiting for Axolotl's next post, the religion I sort of, kind of made up.
And Circe lives on the west coast, I'll need to know that when I go to stalk/kidnap her. Stagger you're still my second choice though, I can get you that sex change operation.
Okay I'm going to stop my random mutterings now.
--
I just have to finish up PJ, and then Uber relgion.
And then ATP and IRA.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:19:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:18:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:17:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
Great writing once again.
---
Yeah - FOR AN ALTER!!
--------------------------
I categorically deny my status as an alter. You Geordie bastard.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-11 13:18:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:17:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
Great writing once again.
---
Yeah - FOR AN ALTER!!
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:24:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:03:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
Doodles, you can't kidnap me, dude. There's no WAY you can lug me to the trunk of your car. But feel free to drop in for a drink on Screaming Random Obscenities At The Neighbors night.
The whole street joins in.
---
That will have to satisfy me then.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:17:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great writing once again.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:11:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:03:52 (#)
Ranking: 0
You are a strange one, Doodles.
---
That I am.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:03:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Doodles, you can't kidnap me, dude. There's no WAY you can lug me to the trunk of your car. But feel free to drop in for a drink on Screaming Random Obscenities At The Neighbors night.
The whole street joins in.
StaggerLee, the story is good as it is. I like it - I like thinking about what's going to happen to the narrator when his guilt and uncertainty kick in and eat away at him, the poor bastard.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:03:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You are a strange one, Doodles.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:02:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Circe, should you ever feel the need to correspond, you can shoot me an email if you like.
siamese_dream.at.optusnet.com.au (har har gay email).
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-11 12:00:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just waiting for Axolotl's next post, the religion I sort of, kind of made up.
And Circe lives on the west coast, I'll need to know that when I go to stalk/kidnap her. Stagger you're still my second choice though, I can get you that sex change operation.
Okay I'm going to stop my random mutterings now.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:53:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great post as per usual Stagger. Now let's hope I don't fuck the rating up as I did with ghola's last night.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:52:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sydney. It's 3:51. This has been the most uneventful Saturday night of this year. And try as I might, even though I've been at home since 10 pm, I couldn't put any more story into this. This was all there was. The end. I wanted it to be longer, dammit.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:48:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
12.48 am... I should go to bed but I'm waiting until the new kitten has stopped running around the bedroom in ever-decreasing circles on its quest to kill my husband.
Then I can roll him out onto the floor and have the bed to myself.
Where are you, anyway?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:44:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
So what is it, like midnight there?
Strangely, the version I heard after all the others was the Cohen one.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:42:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That's fair, I suppose - I think I prefer the other one because it was the one I heard first, you know? Anything else sounded wrong.
West Coast, yep - about an hour south of Perth.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:40:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:37:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
If you've not heard the Rufus Wainwright version of that song, you should. There's something a little extra in the way he sings it - it's worth listening to.
I really like that song.
The story was good, too. Ended well.
---------------
Thanks. I have heard the Wainwright version...I just prefer Buckley's voice.
Also, what the hell are you doing up at this hour? I thought you were Australian. Are you on the west coast or something?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:39:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicely done Stagger. Finished this series well. Well done. And it's always good to have some Buckley about the place.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-03-11 11:37:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you've not heard the Rufus Wainwright version of that song, you should. There's something a little extra in the way he sings it - it's worth listening to.
I really like that song.
The story was good, too. Ended well.