A Pleasent Tale (566 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Real-Life-Crap
Rating: -1.11 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hourman (View user info) at 2006-03-17 05:52:33 EST
When I first joined this site I tried 2 different styles of post.
1. The amusing story.
2. The offensive and shocking post.
None of these seemed to please anyone and I suddenly realised that I didn't actually care. I enjoy writing anything that happens to me or that I think about and whether or not it gets a -2 its good because it's important to me. So what I'm going to tell you about now is how I got the massive scar on my back which is probably nothing more than just a quirky pleasant story.
When I was 16 years old my Dad and I went to a trip to Cornwall for his Birthday (that's his side of the family live, and since he and my mum are divorced he can't exactly hang out with her side can he?!) We left about 6.00 am on Thursday morning to get up there for his Birthday on the Friday which left us that night and the following day to chill out.
We were staying at my auntie's house and because I had never been before I got the guest room whilst he got the lounge and a blow up bed. I had to have the bags in my room because there just wasn't enough space in the lounge. Opposite my auntie's house is a skate park, and enjoying a board every now and then I thought it would be fun. Ten minutes into the ridicule of not being able to pull of a 900 variable kick flip like Tony fucking Hawk (Its not as easy as PS2 you troglodytes) I left the group of chavs and chavettes to their bottles of cider and went home with my tail between my legs. Sleep brought an easy release from that humiliating ordeal.
The next day was the day of the party. We started drinking at around 4pm and therefore by 7 I was pretty drunk. I will not go into what I drank or the quantities because it's neither big nor clever (however somewhat fun) to drink copious amounts of alcohol. Let me give you a brief stream of thought in my absolutely drunk state
'Fucking chavs not letting me skate.....I could do whatever they shouted out....little punks....ought a kick there fucking asses....yeah that would show them (they were about 13 so no it wasn't a hard statement to make)...gonna get my board and go over there and kick some ass....ASSHOLES who the fuck are they to....where's my drink....ok lets go.
So meandering my way over to the park I tried, for the first time, to drop in of a vert. bearing in mind I was pissed and never dropped in before. The next thing I know i'm behind a tree telling my dad it's physically impossible for me to move forwards. I explain that I have been mimicking a crab I found and now all laws of physics means I can only move sideways.
The next thing I know its morning, and I feel great. My room stinks of death. Why? I opened my bag to find some clothes. Threw on a pair of jeans and was about to leave when I saw my dads case. Open With puke all over it/ inside etc. I laughed until it dawned on me. Yep I had puked...allot...in front of everyone. I puked in the pond, at the park, on my now broken board, in my dads' case, on the wall of the house, in my bed and in the sink, none of which are designated puking zones.
I haven't been invited back since. I can say that it was a pretty cool time and I think everyone has to fuck up a little at some point so you don't fuck up allot when it matters.
So that's my new post and I hope you ladies and gentlemen enjoy it this time.
User Reviews
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-06 07:19:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-05 09:54:26 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am going to rate every one of your posts with a +2 without reading them.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2006-04-30 05:56:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Don't drink and skate!! You'll end up like that kid I saw on TV, falling off his board and shattering his forearm in 5 places. Motherfucking thing looked like an accordion. (/mom)
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-17 16:48:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by xanderd (user info) at 2006-03-17 06:15:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
Unnecessary boring detail, bad grammar, boring, no point, not funny, and you forgot to mention the scar which was supposed to be the main point of the story.
Submitted by xanderd (user info) at 2006-03-17 06:15:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Unnecessary boring detail, bad grammar, boring, no point, not funny, and you forgot to mention the scar which was supposed to be the main point of the story.
No offence.
Submitted by refusenik (user info) at 2006-03-17 06:04:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It just tries to hard to be something it's not.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:58:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
One post a day and no shitty spelling mistakes in the title please.
I'm not going to read this.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, I didn't read it.
Know why?
Double post.
Fuck off.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:22 (#)
Ranking: -2
One post a day please.
Please read uber for a bit and have a look at the sort of stuff that is well received. May I recommend http://www.ubersite.com/u/bickerstaff and http://www.ubersite.com/u/stagger_lee ? They both write very interesting fiction.
http://www.ubersite.com/u/w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m does some very funny stories.
Anyway, don't be discouraged, but please do a little research before posting.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
One post a day and no shitty spelling mistakes in the title please.
I'm not going to read this.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, I didn't read it.
Know why?
Double post.
Fuck off.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:57:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
One post a day please.
Please read uber for a bit and have a look at the sort of stuff that is well received. May I recommend http://www.ubersite.com/u/bickerstaff and http://www.ubersite.com/u/stagger_lee ? They both write very interesting fiction.
http://www.ubersite.com/u/w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m does some very funny stories.
Anyway, don't be discouraged, but please do a little research before posting.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-03-17 05:55:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shit just realised I forgot to say about the scar. When i dropped in on the vert i did a massive face plant and landed on my broken board which cut me from my lower back to just below my left shoulder blade. Sorry forgetting to metion it!