Hansel and Gretel (562 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.28 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mister Fahrenheit (View user info) at 2006-03-20 00:47:26 EST
Way deep in the magical forest lived two happy people, Jerry and Susie. They had a lot of fun together. A little too much fun. One day Susie got pregnant and Jerry got really angry and left. Five months later she prematurely gave birth to twins. One boy and one girl. She named them Hansel and Gretel because she was very drunk at the time.
After a few years she decided she didn't like them very much and left to go find Jerry. Hansel and Gretel decided to look around the magical forest for a house made out of candy. They found it with very little trouble and began to eat it and lick it and suck on it and touch it. They became very happy really fast.
Soon a crowd gathered around the house and watched the children enjoy themselves. The man who owned the house, Dr. Filth, came out of the house and inquired why the children were doing these things to his house. The crowd told him they were eating the candy. Dr. Filth didn't know his house was made of candy. He went back inside and gathered his things and left forever.
After the children ate the entire house, the crowd left. The children, now without an audience, cried. Their life had no meaning now. Suddenly, a dragon appeared. But it was a retarded dragon. So the children walked away from it and went back home where they remained for several years until they decided to move to San Francisco. But they died on the way there.
User Reviews
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-03-20 19:40:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-20 19:25:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is the best version of hansel and gretel i've ever read.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-03-20 15:18:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I like the way it FLOWED
Submitted by JackalFett (user info) at 2006-03-20 11:26:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
hmmm...
Submitted by hactar (user info) at 2006-03-20 08:37:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:19:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
honestly, if this was elaborated on it would be pretty funny.
as it stands, though, it sucks. but i'll give you the benefit of the doubt because you're probably a funny dude when you don't jerk off while you post.
good luck with the whole religion thing.
Submitted by digdug (user info) at 2006-03-20 02:14:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha I liked it.