Movies That Scarred Me #1: The Neverending Story (2547 hits)
Category: Movies & TVRating: 1.75 on 74 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dacin Adams <Dacin0828.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2006-03-20 03:34:49 EST
There comes a time in life when something fundamentally changes you and your perspective on life. Usually these experiences happen when you're a child between the ages of about 5 to 12. The experience happens so fast that you barely have time to register the fact that deep down inside, something in your soul has been twisted, ever so slightly. You can't change it back, and you have to live with the fact that your unblemished innocence up to that point is now a couple of degrees away from true north.
A couple of these could be the first time you ever broke a bone, or saw a naked girl--real or on tv--or had your first orgasm, or said the word "fuck" in front of your parents by accident at the dinner table which earned you a backhand from your father and no dessert. For a lot of us in our mid 20's, a lot of these life altering perceptions were wrought in the movies we watched as kids, which brings me to the title of the post.
Mainstream movies, such as Indiana Jones, or the Goonies, or ET, were all blockbuster movies I saw for entertainment purposes, but some rare diamonds in the rough scarred me for life and I have never been the same since. Since this is going to be my first Uber-series, I need to point out that each of these movies has messed me up to the point where all a person needs to say is the name of said movie and immediately, like a bolt of lightning that flashes so fast it's gone before you register you saw it, brief still images from these movies will fly through my consciousness. For this film it'd have to be:
--A super fast snail and a man with a pet bat
--A Harley driving Rock Monster
--Reading a book and eating an apple
--The Empress in white on an asteroid
--A dying horse
--A flying dog
--Shoplifting books
For anyone who hasn't seen this movie, I feel for you. This was one of the greatest fantasy movies of the 80's. Too bad the sequals sucked so much ass. The main character is a kid who gets beat up, runs into a bookshop, shoplifts a book, locks himself in the attic of his school, and reads the volume his grimy paws have stolen. That's about all the emotional attatchment you feel for him, because, seriously, he's kind of a wimp.
The real story is of course, in the book, where you get invited to some of the weirdest characters right off the bat, including the harley driving rock monster, the racing snail, and a narcoleptic bat. From there, it's a whirlwind adventure to a conference to save this place from the NOTHING. Which is earth's lack of imagination. Our hero is Atrayu (sp?) and his horse. And they set off to stop the NOTHING, save the empress who's also sick because earth keeps trying to imagine her nude because we were 9 year old perverts.
Then the first scar came......I have never seen a more depressing scene in my life than when that horse died. I cried my eyes out and had to be taken out of the room. The horse just gives up and dies. What the hell is this shit being shown to kids for? Emotional impact isn't even the right words for this. I mean, this profoundly fucked me up and every time I see a horse, I think I subconsciously wonder if he's got the balls to walk through mud.
Then there was that fucking wolf. I've seen almost every werewolf movie made from the 90's on, and nothing scares the shit out of me like that wolf's eyes and teeth. Evil incarnate was that spooky animal. The fact that he was an agent for the NOTHING, doesn't help.
Then you see the Rock Monster part II, only this time, he has no Harley. He tried to save his friends but the NOTHING just took them clean out of his hands. Now he's just sitting there, waiting to get taken too. It seems like for pretty much the first half of the film is the saddest bunch of characters I've ever seen in a children's movie.
Believe it or not, this film has a happy ending. This film has a great ending, but I'm not here to tell you about that. My job is to tell you about how messed up I still am because my parents rented that movie from their local video store 6 years ago. Here's the google pic for "The Neverending Story." Remember this cross between a dog and a dragon and a snake? Scary as hell to a child.
User Reviews
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-11-17 22:09:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by nerdyjock (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:28:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. My coworkers got mad at me I was laughing so much. Keep up the good work!
Submitted by Jacobt26 (user info) at 2006-03-21 18:38:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuckin stupid.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-21 18:19:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think that movie came out right around the time I was born! I saw it for the first time when I was like four and I cried when the horse died. Poor lazy horse couldn't get his fat ass out of the sand.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2006-03-21 14:15:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
How does this shit have such a high rating? Not a single fucking thing interesting about it.
Wow. NOSTALGIA!! +2!!!
Keep it on IMDB.com, this was boring
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-03-21 12:25:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AlexorGM (user info) at 2006-03-21 11:49:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it scared me too
Submitted by Oleannder (user info) at 2006-03-21 09:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
One of my all time favorite movies.
I am pretty sure that the street scenes in the 'real' world were filmed in Vancouver. The lanscape is so familiar.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-21 03:52:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The statues didn't really mess me up, because they were a trap. when i was a kid, it looked like the eyes opened regardless of what you did and the gnomes didn't know what the fuck they were talking about. It looked like Atreyu got just as far as the knight did, except he ran at the end and the lasers missed him. Feel fear my ass.
Submitted by ser_hag (user info) at 2006-03-21 03:49:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i too was traumatized by those zapping shpinxes in my early years.
Submitted by Ferretnose (user info) at 2006-03-21 01:29:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, you forgot the part where Atreyu has to walk between these two sphinxes that shoot incinerating beams from their soulless eyes if you feel fear. Or something like that.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 23:44:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The only thing that I can remember about the Labrynth (sp?) that messed me up was that lady muppet thing that had all her possesions on her back. She was like the muppet equivelant of a bum with a shopping cart. and bums are just freaky.
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2006-03-20 22:48:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-20 22:05:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Starting at about age four, I had a series of recurring nightmares involving a headless ET chasing me around with an ax. His head was always floating in the air somewhere nearby. I'm not fucking kidding.
I saw this movie when I was nine and had dealt with my fear of headless child's movie icons. These guys didn't faze me in the least.
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The first movie that I ever saw in the theater was ET. I fell asleep, but didn't acknowledge the blessing of said nap until later in life.
On an unrelated note, I've dreamt on more than one occasion that the Fraggles (puppet, not cartoon sort) have me backed into a corner of my kitchen and that I'm conveniently next to the silverware drawer. So, I always grab a fork and stab at their satanic asses.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-20 22:05:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2006-03-20 21:45:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-20 20:53:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-03-20 18:51:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
That movie definitely left me with some dain bramage.
Legend and Labyrinth were good for that too.
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Yes, I was very afraid of the demon guy from Legend. And the aforementioned wolf.
I wasn't very afraid of anything in Labyrinth that I recall, but David Bowie's package bulging out of those hotpants is pretty scary now.
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hahahah!
Come on, now...
how about those lanky orange fuckers who throw their heads around?!
Googly eyed, hyper jerks.
I literally fast forward through that mess. Can't take it.
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Starting at about age four, I had a series of recurring nightmares involving a headless ET chasing me around with an ax. His head was always floating in the air somewhere nearby. I'm not fucking kidding.
I saw this movie when I was nine and had dealt with my fear of headless child's movie icons. These guys didn't faze me in the least.
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2006-03-20 21:45:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-20 20:53:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-03-20 18:51:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
That movie definitely left me with some dain bramage.
Legend and Labyrinth were good for that too.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes, I was very afraid of the demon guy from Legend. And the aforementioned wolf.
I wasn't very afraid of anything in Labyrinth that I recall, but David Bowie's package bulging out of those hotpants is pretty scary now.
------------
hahahah!
Come on, now...
how about those lanky orange fuckers who throw their heads around?!
Googly eyed, hyper jerks.
I literally fast forward through that mess. Can't take it.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-03-20 20:53:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-03-20 18:51:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
That movie definitely left me with some dain bramage.
Legend and Labyrinth were good for that too.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes, I was very afraid of the demon guy from Legend. And the aforementioned wolf.
I wasn't very afraid of anything in Labyrinth that I recall, but David Bowie's package bulging out of those hotpants is pretty scary now.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-03-20 18:51:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That movie definitely left me with some dain bramage.
Legend and Labyrinth were good for that too.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-03-20 18:13:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That dragon always pissed me off.
no fucking wings, looked like a goddamn dog with fucking mange. horseshit.
other than that good movie.
Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle (user info) at 2006-03-20 17:51:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That's a scary dog. linkwore http://www.ubersite.com/m/85533
Submitted by hollygolitely (user info) at 2006-03-20 17:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you going to do the Labyrinth? If so, I won't say which part I still have to fast forward through.
Also, Jonathan Brandis (of such classics as Neverending Story II: The Next Chapter, Ladybugs and Seaquest DSV)committed suicide a few years ago. I was kind of sad about that.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-20 15:42:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THE NEVER-ENDING STORYYYYYYY.....AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AH AHHHHH
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-03-20 14:41:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2006-03-20 13:28:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83623
This movie never scarred me. Superman 3 did, when that bitch got caught in the computers wires and became a evil cyborg. That gave me nightmares. In fact, I still can't watch it.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Fuck yes! I thought I was the only person who thought that was creepy as shit!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-03-20 13:41:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have to agree. The scene with the horse ranks right up there with the dying ewok in Return of the Jedi as the Most Depressing Scene Ever Inflicted on Children.
Submitted by Off_The_Wagon (user info) at 2006-03-20 13:28:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83623
This movie never scarred me. Superman 3 did, when that bitch got caught in the computers wires and became a evil cyborg. That gave me nightmares. In fact, I still can't watch it.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-03-20 13:19:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I FUCKING HATE THAT DILDODOG!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-03-20 13:00:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84124
Submitted by Jimmo (user info) at 2006-03-20 12:40:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Then the first scar came......I have never seen a more depressing scene in my life than when that horse died. I cried my eyes out and had to be taken out of the room. The horse just gives up and dies. What the hell is this shit being shown to kids for? Emotional impact isn't even the right words for this. I mean, this profoundly fucked me up and every time I see a horse, I think I subconsciously wonder if he's got the balls to walk through mud. "
I had to be stopped attacking the tv, what selfish bastard drives his horse into a swamp!
What a C*NT!
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-03-20 12:22:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I LOVED this movie.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 11:42:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's teeth are really freaking me out now. Look at them! No lizard has teeth like that, nor any dog. So what the fuck species is it? Falcor you creepy child molester.
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2006-03-20 11:36:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ATRAU!!
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2006-03-20 10:50:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are fucking kidding me!
He named her Moonchild??
What teh ghey???
I will have to rewatch with the close captioning on to verify this.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-03-20 10:23:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking love this movie,
but I can't believe you didn't notice the Oracles were topless...DOH
And what about the creepy cave-dwelling telescope gazers that make you drink wormwater?
EW
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-03-20 10:04:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:18:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bastian: But I can't, I have to keep my feet on the ground!
The Childlike Empress: Call my name.Bastian! Please! Save us!
Bastian: All right! I'll do it! I'll save you! I will do what I dream!
[Climbs to the window and yells out in the storm]
Bastian: MOONCHILD!
--------------------------------------------
THANK YOU! I've been trying to figure out what that kid said for over 20 years!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:36:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:18:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bastian: But I can't, I have to keep my feet on the ground!
The Childlike Empress: Call my name.Bastian! Please! Save us!
Bastian: All right! I'll do it! I'll save you! I will do what I dream!
[Climbs to the window and yells out in the storm]
Bastian: MOONCHILD!
One word for that:
Ponce.
---
Though actually. Say my name bitch!
MOOOONNCHILD! *ejaculates*
Submitted by JackalFett (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:28:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for some of the comments inspired by the post.
Submitted by JackalFett (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:27:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 For the post.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:18:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bastian: But I can't, I have to keep my feet on the ground!
The Childlike Empress: Call my name.Bastian! Please! Save us!
Bastian: All right! I'll do it! I'll save you! I will do what I dream!
[Climbs to the window and yells out in the storm]
Bastian: MOONCHILD!
One word for that:
Ponce.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:17:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-20 08:41:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
No wonder the kid that played Bastion killed himself.
---
Bastian was also Daryl in the film D.A.R.Y.L. - perhaps that's why he killed himself? And he was right to do so for that atrocity.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-20 09:15:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ha ha horse
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-20 08:41:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No wonder the kid that played Bastion killed himself.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:26:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wasn't that fucking horse's name Artex or something? Should have just gone for it and called it plasterboard. But I've never been so depressed as I was when he gave up and died. I bawled my preteen emo eyes out, but not as much as I did at Watership Down.
The League of Gentlemen ruined that song for me.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:14:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No longer sure it was Jim Henson.
Think animator's studio, and a metal dragon, not yet fully wrapped in its flesh. Erm?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:11:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jim Henson was the puppeteer wasn't he? What was that film he did with the mechanical dragon that only one little boy could talk to? Or something.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:07:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Or fly with Falcor the weird toothed thingy
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:07:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shit yeah. The sphinxes. RUN YOU BASTARD ATREYU!! No explanation as to why he didn't just go round the side or anything.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 07:06:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Trying to explain the features of a creature like Falcor is clearly an exercise in futility. Although, looking at some other Neverending Pics, I just now realized that those statues that shoot the laser beams out of their eyes were topless.
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:58:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:26:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Falcor's teeth: Inconsistent with either lizard(dragon) or dog. Explain?
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not one of my seminal 80s movies I'm afraid.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:23:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah... that's kind of like the time i was jerking off into a tube sock when my mom walked in. we made eye contact and coincidentally i climaxed at the exact same time. she didn't know because philly dimpleton was in the sock at the time, but it was still awful inconveniant and sexually confusing... i mean, i told her to knock.... I TOLD HER TO FUCKING KNOCK!!!!!!!
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:21:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know about Wil Wheaton, but I do know that Jonathon Brandis was in #2, and later he that asthmatic daydreamer in "Sidekicks" with Chuck Norris.
then he killed himself. I guess the movies speak for themselves.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:16:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wasn't that shitter Wil Wheaton in one of the sequels?
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:09:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
See, what happened was, I rented the movie, watched until the "hover" machine just went straight up and over the machines and started jacking off there.................................
............................but I finished right as she died. So I'm not sure what to tell you about that one.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:06:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:41:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
I just remember saying out loud "what the fuck?!?!" in the theater and being told to shut up. It's still a sore spot and I cry myself to sleep after masturbating to pictures of Trinity. No offense.
----------------------------------------
when she was alive or after she died?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 06:03:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:48:44 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:34:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:08:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
Really, when you think about it, the modern audience is so jaded that the only pleasure a director is going to be able to shock their audience is in a childrens movie.
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That's why my first film will be called 'happy joy joy' and be theoretically about a boy and his dog having fun at the beach - it will soon take a turn for the worst though when the dog is cursed by a crab spirit and becomes an evil undead beast which will chase down the boy and slowly rip his face off.
I'll scar a generation.
He'll probably shit on some Care Bears as well afterwards.
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You ain't got shit on Bambi. They killed the dudes mother.
How awesome would it be to see that film with your youngin's though? You'd walk out clutching you like someone was going to take you away and be all affectionate for at least a week.
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What if your kid didn't cry though? You'd be all 'woah - you souless shit - you're adopted and you'll die alone' and they'll be like 'watch me spider walk down the stairs' then Tubular Bells starts, Mike Oldfield starts throwing shit at the monkeys and then a scene from Scary Movie starts.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:58:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bright Eyes, burning like fire, bright eyes...
Can't think of that film without thinking of some old bloke watching a young couple in bed while masturbating.
No one outside the UK will get that.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:41:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I just remember saying out loud "what the fuck?!?!" in the theater and being told to shut up. It's still a sore spot and I cry myself to sleep after masturbating to pictures of Trinity. No offense.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:39:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
dacin, for whatever reason the machines couldn't fly that high. i can't explain the technology, i'm sorry. i mean, it didn't work out too well for neo and trinity, if you'll recall.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:27:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
a Machine city..............guarded by super big machines...........ringed with them even.
"How do we get in?"
"ummmmmmm, we'll fly over them. They can't be expecting that."
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:24:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
matrix sequels were awesome, you just have to understand that they were written before the original matrix.
i've written six papers in the last three years on the matrix and theology, philosphy, and poli-sci.
but i'm also fucking awesome, so i don't know.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:16:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I cannot think of any trilogy where the sequals sucked that badly. Not even the Matrix. Did anyone ever see the stupid ass cartoon they made?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-20 05:11:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think what scarred me more than anything was the lacklustre nature of the sequels. Pissed me right off.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:55:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Turn around
Look at what you see
In her face
The mirror of your dream
Make believe I'm everywhere
I'm hidden in the lines
And written on the pages
Is the answer to a neverending story
Reach the stars
Fly a fantasy
Dream a dream
And what you see will be
Rhymes that keep their secrets
Will unfold behind the clouds
And there upon the rainbow
Is the answer to a neverending story, story
Show no fear
For she may fade away
In your hands
The birth of a new day
Rhymes that keep their secrets
Will unfold behind the clouds
And there upon the rainbow
Is the answer to a neverending story
Neverending Story
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:48:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:34:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:08:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
Really, when you think about it, the modern audience is so jaded that the only pleasure a director is going to be able to shock their audience is in a childrens movie.
---
That's why my first film will be called 'happy joy joy' and be theoretically about a boy and his dog having fun at the beach - it will soon take a turn for the worst though when the dog is cursed by a crab spirit and becomes an evil undead beast which will chase down the boy and slowly rip his face off.
I'll scar a generation.
He'll probably shit on some Care Bears as well afterwards.
----------
You ain't got shit on Bambi. They killed the dudes mother.
How awesome would it be to see that film with your youngin's though? You'd walk out clutching you like someone was going to take you away and be all affectionate for at least a week.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:43:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That's why my first film will be called 'happy joy joy' and be theoretically about a boy and his dog having fun at the beach - it will soon take a turn for the worst though when the dog is cursed by a crab spirit and becomes an evil undead beast which will chase down the boy and slowly rip his face off.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! I'd pay $12 for a ticket to that and enjoy it so much more than the last attempt at scarring I saw in the last Harry Potter movie. I think Hollywood is out of touch with how to create maladjusted social miscreants. Shame too. It had such a handle on it back when I was a kid. String em along happily, then fuck them over so fast the shock value guarantees silence for the rest of the movie.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:43:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:33:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:12:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
you sound like my girlfriend. she loves this fucking movie. me, i think it might be worse than the ugly shit i took after friday's shennanigans.
but fuck it, i'm wrong most of the time, and who am i to ruin a four-review streak?
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Yeah but then you've always got the saturday morning excuse:
"Lubbudy jub, you need to mow the lawn, buy dinner, come with me to look at pink things and do the washing up" says bint.
"But I don't wanna! I won't do it, you can't make me! I shall hold my breath until I die!" Wardy would warble.
"Don't take that tone with me young man, you've got to take responsibility for your own life. I'm not going to be here forever you know." Bint retorts.
"But no, I can't do it. Oh, I'm falling into the pit of despair and cannot possibly go on." Says Wardy as he pokes her lady bits.
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BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... i laughed out loud. nobody hates you as much as i do, berty.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:34:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:08:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
Really, when you think about it, the modern audience is so jaded that the only pleasure a director is going to be able to shock their audience is in a childrens movie.
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That's why my first film will be called 'happy joy joy' and be theoretically about a boy and his dog having fun at the beach - it will soon take a turn for the worst though when the dog is cursed by a crab spirit and becomes an evil undead beast which will chase down the boy and slowly rip his face off.
I'll scar a generation.
He'll probably shit on some Care Bears as well afterwards.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:33:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:12:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
you sound like my girlfriend. she loves this fucking movie. me, i think it might be worse than the ugly shit i took after friday's shennanigans.
but fuck it, i'm wrong most of the time, and who am i to ruin a four-review streak?
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Yeah but then you've always got the saturday morning excuse:
"Lubbudy jub, you need to mow the lawn, buy dinner, come with me to look at pink things and do the washing up" says bint.
"But I don't wanna! I won't do it, you can't make me! I shall hold my breath until I die!" Wardy would warble.
"Don't take that tone with me young man, you've got to take responsibility for your own life. I'm not going to be here forever you know." Bint retorts.
"But no, I can't do it. Oh, I'm falling into the pit of despair and cannot possibly go on." Says Wardy as he pokes her lady bits.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:12:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
you sound like my girlfriend. she loves this fucking movie. me, i think it might be worse than the ugly shit i took after friday's shennanigans.
but fuck it, i'm wrong most of the time, and who am i to ruin a four-review streak?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-03-20 04:08:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Really, when you think about it, the modern audience is so jaded that the only pleasure a director is going to be able to shock their audience is in a childrens movie.
Submitted by Dacin (user info) at 2006-03-20 03:51:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I was seriously going to do a "transformers" installment, because Optimus Prime scarred every boy on earth who saw that movie, but it's been done too much on here
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2006-03-20 03:46:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That film was awesome!
Also, we've got a dog that looks just like Falcor.
Fuck all luck though.
Gave me the shits.
Submitted by Snalty (user info) at 2006-03-20 03:41:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"These used to be strong hands..."
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-20 03:39:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Falcor? The luck dragon.
I agree with this post. One unsettling film, HOWEVER, I seem to remember crying at Optimus Prime's death
http://www.ubersite.com/m/79435 24 minutes, 34 seconds into this film in 1987 I was sobbing uncontrollably and shouting 'why? - why have they done this? You crazy Japanese bastards - have you no heart - and who is this 'Hot Rod' bloke? I'm six and I can tell you his name is well suspect!'