FUPA Round 2 - Feng-Huang (904 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.95 on 64 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (View user info) at 2006-03-24 12:03:19 EST
It's time
Time for the dead and gone
Time for the broken ones to live again
It's time
Time for the dead to rise
Time for these wings to fly
And soar within
I can hear the calling
I can hear the sound of rain
Over the mountains
And over the valleys
I hear the calling
It's time
It's time
Time for the dead to sing
Time for the walls to ring
With the songs of freedom
It's time
Time for the numb to feel
Time for the wounds to heal
And find out what we've become
I can hear the calling
I can hear the sound of rain
Over the mountains
And over the valleys
I hear the calling
It's time
It's time
Time for the tide to turn
Time for our hearts to burn
With a desperation
It's time
Time for a sacrifice
Time that we paid the price
For our generation
Over the mountains
And over the valleys
I hear the calling
It's time
I can hear the calling
I can hear the sound of rain
User Reviews
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-11-09 16:40:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Alabaster duck roast.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-29 13:23:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, nitty. How noble of you.
I guess this means I now officially have an Uber arch-nemesis? Such a sad day in Mudville...
*weeps*
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-29 13:13:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No comment
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-29 13:09:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*shits in Thorny's hand*
But here, have a 0 instead of the customary -2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-29 12:57:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
nitty...i'm tired of arguing. Look, I'm sorry for pissing you off...how about you apologize, too, and we call it a truce and get on with our regular posts? Please?
*reaches out hand*
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-29 12:12:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Scratch that. I KNOW what you'll do.
1. Cry
2. Cry
3. Kiss some ass
4. Cry
5. Quit
6. Come back
7. Cry
repeat as desired
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-29 12:11:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm toast?
What the FUCK are you going to do?
And no, he's not my alter. I have ONE alter who has neither posted nor replied in a year.
You're just mad because this piece of shit is finally getting recognized for what it truly is.
Go sing in the choir, you fucking flamer.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:59:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Go right ahead, you fucktard, I'll find out whose alter you are and get you banned.
And by the way, I hated Van Halen.
Submitted by Hot_For_Teacher (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:58:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
nope...not nitty...guess again, captain cumstain.
Submitted by Hot_For_Teacher (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:57:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
hee hee hee hee hee
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:52:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh for the love of Chri...
nitty, if this is YOUR alter, you're toast.
Submitted by Hot_For_Teacher (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:51:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
and another one for being a jerk
Submitted by Hot_For_Teacher (user info) at 2006-03-29 11:50:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you're mean! i changed my mind...boooo
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-29 09:11:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
not my alter, nitty...i TOLD you, i don't have any.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-29 09:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Keep your ghey alters off this shit, cumstain.
Submitted by Hot_For_Teacher (user info) at 2006-03-29 08:59:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well, the lyrics were better than the recording, dude
+2 on effort
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:12:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
GHEY!
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:11:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
The music one was worse
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:11:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was NOT good
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:11:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You are a baby
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:10:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Gank is your alter
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:10:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-28 09:03:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Audio version: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85925
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-28 08:09:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
O-Man: can I reneg on my withdrawal and re-enter the contest, if it's okay with Axolotl?
Just so I can laugh when I beat nitty in the final round.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-28 08:07:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've changed my mind about the hiatus. Fuck if I'm going to let nitty and crew bully me around because of the usual asshat antics.
Yes, I may not post and review as often, but I'm not going anywhere. At least not until it gets me fired.
Time to MAN-UP
POWER +2
*breaks bricks with head*
*stomps on Goomba*
I'M BACK, BEEYOTCHES
Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-03-27 17:42:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not still pretending to be your alter, this was good.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 16:07:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-27 13:23:54 (#)
Ranking: 1
I guess it doesn't matter now, but I'll rate it anyway.
The drumming repetition of 'time' was a nice touch.
I'd be curious to see how you'd read this aloud.
--------------------------------------------------
You'll find out tomorrow.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-27 13:24:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-27 13:23:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I guess it doesn't matter now, but I'll rate it anyway.
The drumming repetition of 'time' was a nice touch.
I'd be curious to see how you'd read this aloud.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:51:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:48:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:39:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
This contest has been ruined by the "poetic license" gangstas. I'm dropping out. Axolotl wins round 2.
==============
Nonsense. What would a comp be without Thorny?
----------------------------------------------
Better?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:48:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:39:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
This contest has been ruined by the "poetic license" gangstas. I'm dropping out. Axolotl wins round 2.
==============
Nonsense. What would a comp be without Thorny?
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I still didn't read this.
Don't worry, I didn't read Axotol's either.
Submitted by blueboy (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:43:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 FUPA drama
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:39:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This contest has been ruined by the "poetic license" gangstas. I'm dropping out. Axolotl wins round 2.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-03-27 11:20:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't read this.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-27 09:51:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll +2 your next non FUPA post!
xoxoxo
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 08:59:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-27 08:19:07 (#)
Ranking: -2
You used to be good until you sold out and started entering exclusive contests, and stuff.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Exclusive* contests?
Cracker, please! I've entered EVERY contest since Ubermas '05.
But I still love you.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-27 08:19:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You used to be good until you sold out and started entering exclusive contests, and stuff.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-27 07:45:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-25 14:42:40 (#)
Ranking: -2
Auto -2 : tainted competion
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Make love, not war!
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2006-03-26 01:33:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I really liked this. Sounded like a tribal chant.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-25 14:42:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Auto -2 : tainted competion
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-25 13:27:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Time for the dead to rise
Time for these wings to fly
And soar within
+
cliches make baby shakespear cry.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-03-24 19:48:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Beggin' yer pardon, Cap'n, but Imo have ta +2 ya on this.
The meaning was great, the rhythm was excellent, and I normally
hate free-verse poetry. Yes, it would make a great song, but it
stands on its own as good poetry. . .
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-24 17:52:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-03-24 17:51:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
not quite awesome.
it's nice, but is sort of vague.
i suppose that's to say it's just not to my tastes and that i prefer poetry to be much more concise, specific and such.
i did like it though.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:46:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aha. Very good reason to keep it untouched, so disregard my comments below.
And "chorus" wasn't a good choice of words (certainly NOT meant to suggest turning this into a song).
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:27:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:10:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:02:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
Please don't. I will never be able to read any of your posts again without thinking of HAIR ROCK!!
Twisted sister style perhaps?
================================
Hahaha...no, either unplugged acoustic or contemp Christian rock style...
---
Don't cross me Thorny with your talk of Christian rock. As I am feeling benevolent, check this guy out. He may very well be a genius. I've seen him live a few times, and he is astounding.
http://www.harperspace.com/nick-harper-downloads.html
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:10:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:02:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
Please don't. I will never be able to read any of your posts again without thinking of HAIR ROCK!!
Twisted sister style perhaps?
================================
Hahaha...no, either unplugged acoustic or contemp Christian rock style...
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 16:02:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Please don't. I will never be able to read any of your posts again without thinking of HAIR ROCK!!
Twisted sister style perhaps?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 15:55:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Would it help if I followed up with a post of me singing it?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-24 15:44:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not sure on this one Capt.
I need to think about it a bit.
1 for now, but I may come back and revise later. I'm going to print this off and read it over a few times tonight.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 15:29:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-03-24 14:56:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
I've thought about this a bit. I would almost like to re-order the three groupings in this poem. You have 1) variant/chorus, 2) variant/chorus, 3) variant/re-ordered chorus.
The variant in 1) had more of a wow-factor for me, & would do better for build-up if it were third.
Same with the 2) variant over 3). So my order would go 3), 2), then 1) with re-ordered chorus ('cause that was a nice touch).
In other words, in my head it currently goes 1) Rebirth, 2) Memorial, 3) Sacrifice, and I'd like it to be the other way around.
If you get what I mean, go over it in your head, and tell me if you think I'm being a jackass. And if so, set me straight. Either way, you made me think about it enough to come up with this, so, +2Bravo.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yeah, I get what you mean...do it in death/rebirth order instead of rebirth/death, as I did. I chose the latter format because of the cyclical nature of the phoenix...it is constantly being reborn, does its work (memorial), and then must resign itself to an inevitable sacrificial death in order to start the entire cycle again.
Kind of a "sunrise to sundown" perspective, if you will. Feng-Huang rises and sets with the sun, from the Chinese perspective.
Alternatively, if I were to do it from a Christian perspective, then I would definitely go with your order...sacrifice-memorial-rebirth.
I appreciate your time and thoughts on this...glad to see my effort wasn't totally lost on everyone.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-03-24 14:56:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've thought about this a bit. I would almost like to re-order the three groupings in this poem. You have 1) variant/chorus, 2) variant/chorus, 3) variant/re-ordered chorus.
The variant in 1) had more of a wow-factor for me, & would do better for build-up if it were third.
Same with the 2) variant over 3). So my order would go 3), 2), then 1) with re-ordered chorus ('cause that was a nice touch).
In other words, in my head it currently goes 1) Rebirth, 2) Memorial, 3) Sacrifice, and I'd like it to be the other way around.
If you get what I mean, go over it in your head, and tell me if you think I'm being a jackass. And if so, set me straight. Either way, you made me think about it enough to come up with this, so, +2Bravo.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:32:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Redskies - no apologies needed. Some of my brands of musical poetry isn't for everyone.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:22:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Imagine this poem, but with your face screwed up, one hand in the air in a semi clawlike position while in the background bad guitar plays and perhaps the American flag waves in the background.
Sorry man.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:22:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
That would have helped it.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:20:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:16:15 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:09:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
meh... needs more animation...
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What were you expecting, a guy butt-fucking a purple phoenix?
----
YES
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:19:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't decide whether this is more of a Meatloaf or Bon Jovi song.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:16:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:09:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
meh... needs more animation...
----------------------------------
What were you expecting, a guy butt-fucking a purple phoenix?
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:09:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
meh... needs more animation...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:06:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm sorry. Orgasmo made me do this.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:05:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Rebirth!
I suspect this half of the theme will be a rare one.
I really liked the repetition in this.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:05:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Make that Chinese, not Japanese.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-03-24 12:04:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
FUPA Round 2 contest link: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85706
History note: Feng-Huang is the Japanese name for the phoenix.