Oh my god! Turn on CNN right now! (1033 hits)
Category: Politics -> IraqRating: -1.35 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <renz0r.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-03-31 10:20:12 EST
For those of you who don't have access to CNN right now, here is the gist - A tape was received by Al Jazeera early this morning, here is a partial transcript:
"WE THE PEOPLES JIHADI LIBERATION ARMY OF IRAQI ISLAMIC TALIBANI DEMAND THE IMMEDIATE WITHDRAWAL OF ALL INFIDEL CRUSADER DEVIL FORCES FROM OUR SACRED MUSLIM LAND. THIS IS TO BE DONE BY APRIL 1 AT MIDNIGHT OR WE WILL EXECUTE OUR PRISONER!!"
The tape later continued:
"ALSO WE DEMAND THAT QUEBEC BE GIVEN TO US AS PAYMENT FOR THE ATROCITIES OF THE FOREIGN INVADERS."
The tape concluded with a chilling threat:
"BURKA! BURKA!"
User Reviews
Submitted by paulblakeford (user info) at 2006-04-05 09:21:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-04-01 00:30:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
.....
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-03-31 15:40:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
for pic
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-03-31 15:33:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
you should change your name to 'nigz0r' instead.
just a thought.
Submitted by renz0r (user info) at 2006-03-31 12:33:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah I've got something for you Caul.. wait till next week...
Muhahahah
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-03-31 12:19:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Quebec > World
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-31 12:03:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, so I'll bump this a bit for the -2DIE on the microwave.
Submitted by renz0r (user info) at 2006-03-31 11:29:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jeez.. So many -2s!
Guess that's what I get for keeping my fellow uberites up to date with the latest news :~(
I know it's a tragic thing, but I am sure it will work out! Chin up! I am sure the emu will walk away unscathed :)
Let us all give a prayer for the safe release of the emu.. And a prayer for the souls of the heathen captors.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-03-31 11:16:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah axolotl or whatever his name is got it right.
We fucking work and don't care.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-03-31 11:07:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"Show me show me show me how you rate those posts
The ones that make you scream," she said
The ones you loathe and hate," she said
And worked my shaft with all her toes
"Show me how you rate them
I want to know, I want to know
How to give minus twos
How to give minus twos."
Typing on those well-used keys
I showed her how to own newbies
The sliding of her soft, arched feet made me
Let loose a groan
"Don't you stop your rating now" she said
"For I won't let you cum until you minus two
Until you minus two."
Twos
Swift and vicious
Twos
Mmm delicious
Twos
Lubed as dildos
Sliding in the deepest cornhole
Twisting in the colon
Your ass they will ream
Midnight came to no surprise
I woke to find her dead beside
The keyboard where "minus two die"
Was typed mere hours before
I found myself alone alone
Alone above her corpse, sticky,
Her footjob'd clearly done the trick
And drowned her with my mighty seed.
Twos
Swift and vicious
Twos
Mmm delicious
Twos
Just like Jersey
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:45:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh God.
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:39:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking alters
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:36:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Quick! Turn on my dick and shove it up your ass!!!
Submitted by xanderd (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:34:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I almost -1'd this.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:31:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck off.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:29:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
We are at work, however I'd like to point out that us learned gentlemen from the UK are about to embark on copious amounts of beer intake. As it is 4.30pm and the pub (that I drink in) is opening at 5pm.
That is all.
Submitted by renz0r (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:27:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't understand all the hostility?
Hey, I know it's upsetting.. But don't shoot the messenger eh?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:27:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:26:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Even the -2DIE couldn't save this.
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:25:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i like peanuts
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:25:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
We're all at work.
We actually have jobs.
Submitted by renz0r (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:23:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah I think it's a microwave ;(
Seems the counter is set to "-2DIE"... that can't be good?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:22:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
One question, tiger.
Do you suck on purpose?
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:21:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
OH NOES!!!
Is that a microwave??
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-03-31 10:21:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Lame.
You probably don't even know how to say "emu" properly either, moron.