Remembrance of Things Past (538 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.45 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Lee & Tan (View user info) at 2006-04-07 12:07:46 EDT
Sometimes, on rainy days, I will brew fresh pots of 'Long Jing' tea and take to enjoying them on the balcony of my 21st floor apartment. More often than not, between the lightly scented tea and the gentle tropical breeze, an ambience for introspective thought would be set. It is at such times that the hubris of the real world would fade away and I would find myself reminscencing on various experiences I have had for the past five decades. As it is with life, such experiences are chequered and more often than not bitter rather than sweet. Of all these experiences however, there is one which stands out like a crane among ducks.
The curtains of this story shall be raised in the late 40s when I was but 8 years old. It was a time when the nation was recovering from the brutal aftermath of the japanese occupation. Like many during this era, the absolute devastation of the economy meant tht my family was forced into abject poverty. As anybody who has been through a similar experience would udoubtedly tell you, life in poverty is simple and revolves around two polarities. Namely, hunger and its satiation.
Every day, at the crack of dawn, my father would rouse me and my brothers and set us off into the forest in search for food. We would literally eat anything that moved, birds, snails, earthworms...etc. One day, after returning from a particular unfruitful day of foraging, we were delighted to find that father has caught and killed a monkey. Having never eaten a monkey before, we became rather excited, and were literally jumping with joy. Such was the desperation of the times that eating was like tripping on acid, its a high.
As is customary with the culinary preperation of animals, we began by first shaving off the fiberous and unedible fur. To our uneasiness however, as we shaved the dead creature, it became increasingly apparent how uncanny an unfurred monkey resembles a baby human. By the time the de-furring process has been completed, 6 pairs of eyes were now transfixed on what, for all purpose and intent, was an exact replica of a human baby. A deathly silence befalled the house. A silence, of all ironies, broken by the faint gurguling sound of the boiling pot in the kitchen. We all knew what had to be done.
Suffice to say, hunger got the better of us, and the monkey was cooked. 15 minutes later, I was greeted by a sight which would forever be etched into the deepest recesses of my mind. If I have ever seen a boiled baby, I saw it that day.
All I shall say is there are some sights which no man should suffer... as such I will spare you the remaining details of the ensuing feast and end my narration here.
User Reviews
Submitted by fclo002 (user info) at 2006-12-21 12:52:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-04-09 13:01:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Should have continued.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-04-07 19:05:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
decent idea, but this was a dull read.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-04-07 15:32:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You were revolted by the sight of a boiled baby?
What the fuck are you doing at Ubersite?!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-07 15:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
To this day, there are very, very few wild animals in China - people literally eat every living creature they can find.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-04-07 15:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Much ado about.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-04-07 15:14:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/64546
Submitted by MonkeyingAround (user info) at 2006-04-07 13:08:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
mmmm monkey brains... can I have his fur to sniff?
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2006-04-07 12:40:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2006-04-07 12:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-07 12:10:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I remember this great shit I took back in 7th grade. Almost hit the ceiling.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-04-07 12:10:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 monkey