I'm Gonna Kill That Woman - Blues Writing Challenge Signups (12963 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.96 on 362 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stagger Lee (View user info) at 2006-04-18 07:27:38 EDT
I was going to wait til I could find out how much interest there would be in something like this, then I decided that the best way to find out how much interest there would be was just to post the damn thing.
Alright, then. This is a writing competition based around stories, songs or poems with blues-related themes. I'm talking unjustified vengeance in poorly lit bars. I'm talking serial killers and hangings, people doing time. I'm talking confrontation and deals with the devil. I'm talking lonely stories about travelling desolate highways. I'm talking about that time your baby left you, stole all your money and ran to Mexico. I'm talking jumped-up Jesus-shouters in tents pitched in cornfields. I'm talking revolvers and whisky, crumpled suits and battered hats.
This is the signup for the above competition. Signups will continue until I decide we've got enough (or until I decide we aren't going to get enough, either way). We'll play it with round-by-round themes, not titles, because specific titles eat creativity for breakfast. Please feel free to suggest themes that carry that ole time blues flavour, as well. More rules and so on will be spelled out in the next post, if there's sufficient interest to warrant going ahead with this thing.
Possible themes so far:
Travelling stories
Vengeance
Drink
The devil
Love
Doing time
You know, that sort of thing. All suggestions will be arbitrarily accepted or discarded by me, though I want to hear what people think of the themes I've proposed above. Anyway, hopefully we'll get some interest and this thing will start a-rolling. Or it won't.
User Reviews
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2007-12-07 01:34:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I killed someone once.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-21 02:11:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like you
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-23 22:34:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, LSD, you missed the cutoff, mate. Next time, eh?
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-04-23 16:33:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
holyshitiamsoin
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-04-21 07:03:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Rad, you bitch! I'll claw your eyes out!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-20 07:45:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fuck you caesar
im not some cheap hussy
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:19:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 09:14:35 (#)
Ranking: 0
Alright, signups are closed.
Rules, Theme and Matchups soon.
**********************
Oh, I see. You got what you wanted from some other cheap hussy. Fine.
Heh heh, I'm interested to see what comes of this.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:16:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 01:21:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86769
Caes, would you be interested in playing our little games?
********************************
Helloooo...
I'm flattered you came to recruit me, but I can't. I'm not around my computer for the next week and a half, and then I need some time to get my life back in order when I return. Plus, I know squat about the blues or writing song lyrics (which is exactly the reason i would probably give it a try otherwise).
The +2 is because I always, always approve of little projects/competitions like this. Anything that spurs people to write something decent.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:47:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I probably should've mentioned that the Rules, Theme and Matchup post was now up. I won't link it, I'm sure you smart kids can find it yourselves.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 09:14:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alright, signups are closed.
Rules, Theme and Matchups soon.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 09:01:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Glad you took it onboard in the right spirit. I thought the story was really cool.
I feel your pain. I'm a chronic first-drafter. Anything you see on this site by me is a first draft and probably will be forever.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-04-19 08:47:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOU DIRTY BASTARD! TWO +1s AND A 0 FOR SURVIVOR!? OMG WTF!!!!!
just kidding. criticism duly noted and yes it has been a long time since I posted it so a lot of that I have already recogonized. I do appreciate you taking the time to read/rate it and hope you enjoyed the story.
I too think it could be something bigger than it is but I have this problem where I don't re-write stuff. it bothers me to no end and I've tried several times to sit down to do a re-write on it but it is almost physically painful, that is all first draft as I wrote it the morning it was posted. I really do need to go back and do it though. Several of the things you mentioned are on my list for the re-write; needs to be longer, more fleshed out, yes some of the characters were nothing more than cannon fodder, and lastly I need to get rid of every reference to Survivor. much of the telling/showing issue would resolve itself if i were to flesh this all out and give it more "life".
eh, whatever, someday might be too late, I really need to do this before the paralell to Survivor is no longer relevant.
Thanks again for reading I appreciate it.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 08:02:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck, you can't wait another 2 hours? Jeez.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-19 08:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck it - i'm going home
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-19 07:55:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Post the set up you bastard or be damned. Fucking second place losers. If Liverpool overtake you I may have a giggling fit.
If riling my alter like that isn't enough to earn Circe in the first round, nothing will.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 06:26:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Absolutely, badassmofo, you can mantain a series or a character, whatever you like. I'll post full rules once I do the matchups.
I think the only really fair way to do the matchups is random draw, so I'll stick with that.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-19 06:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think you should re-seat the lineup...we should face off as you have it listed there.
Also, since we are not posting in secrecy (ala UM) is it safe to say that we could develop a character in our first entry and maintain that character until the last round?
I mean not that I would do that (read: HEY THAT'S MY IDEA)
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 05:09:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You want to know what's going on? Right. This is the list of competitors so far:
1. redskieslookfake
2. Stagger_Lee
3. Circe
4. Bubba2341
5. Brdn_Nkd
6. scourge
7. Orgasmatron
8. Coyote
9. Wardy
10. Stuch
11. Gank
12. Jack_McCallum
13. Sphagnum
14. badassmofo
15. CaptainThorns
16. Chroniclysm
17. Snark
18. Promethias
19. r0fl
20. BigMike
21. Unabonger
22. rad1101
I'm giving it another couple of hours or so, then I'm going to do the draw for the matchups and the theme and do a post around midnight (AEST). The whole comp's gonna run on AEST, so work out the time difference for where you live, everyone.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-19 04:56:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Howay now Staggsy. Let us know what's going on.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:32:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've met some mean pies in my day.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:28:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for the first round.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:28:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll put the over/under at 2.5
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:24:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I still don't understand where all this negativity towards me comes from. I don't have a single negative bone in my body and am as nice as pie to everyone on this forum.
____________________________________________________________________________-
YAY! pie!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:22:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Anyone wanna run a book to bet on how many drop-outs we get?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:21:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
1. redskieslookfake
2. Stagger_Lee
3. Circe
4. Bubba2341
5. Brdn_Nkd
6. scourge
7. Orgasmatron
8. Coyote
9. Wardy
10. Stuch
11. Gank
12. Jack_McCallum
13. Sphagnum
14. badassmofo
15. CaptainThorns
16. Chroniclysm
17. Snark
18. Promethias
19. r0fl
20. BigMike
21. Unabonger
22. rad1101
Well, rad, you won't necessarily be playing Unabonger as the draw will be made at random, but you're both in the list now.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:20:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EVERYBODY WATCH OUT
RAD1101 MAKES HIS COMEBACK
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:19:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll play him.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:16:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You can still join, Unabonger, but we've gotten to the cutoff point where if more people are to come in, then we need another person to join with you. So if nobody else wants to play you might have to miss out, sorry.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:08:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Last time I entered an uber contest I came in second place and then went on a 7 month hiatus. I don't think I'll be wanting to do another one anytime soon.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-04-19 03:01:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
look foward to reading these.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-04-19 02:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
let me in if it's not too late...
another theme: dog shit on the carpet. I got mad blues on that one, baby...like black folk struggling against 'The Man' kinda blues.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-04-19 02:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whiskey Fedora, Oh Me Begorra
Fer Christ sakes me good youngster Boyo
You add all the Playas
Fer Blues in this dayas
I'm just a good blue boy ho-ha. . .
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 01:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
1. redskieslookfake
2. Stagger_Lee
3. Circe
4. Bubba2341
5. Brdn_Nkd
6. scourge
7. Orgasmatron
8. Coyote
9. Wardy
10. Stuch
11. Gank
12. Jack_McCallum
13. Sphagnum
14. badassmofo
15. CaptainThorns
16. Chroniclysm
17. Snark
18. Promethias
19. r0fl
20. BigMike
Ok, I've pimped the competition out to mockidol and TheCaes, but they'll both need to join or neither of them can. This is the list as of now, I'll give the 2 guys I invited a bit of time to join. If they don't want to play, this is probably the list that we'll go with. In a few hours I'll put the names and themes into the Whisky Fedora and make the draw. I'll decide then if I could be bothered getting a bracket made.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-04-18 23:44:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
doodles -- http://www.ubersite.com/m/85741
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-04-18 23:15:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't been around alot lately, but I'm down with this.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 23:03:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alright, 19 participants. We'll need an even number to get the ball rolling, but this is the list so far. Can someone pimp this to TheCaes or someone else that likes a bit o' writing?
redskieslookfake
Stagger_Lee
Circe
Bubba2341
Brdn_Nkd
scourge
Orgasmatron
Coyote
Wardy
Stuch
Gank
Jack_McCallum
Sphagnum
badassmofo
CaptainThorns
Chroniclysm
Snark
Promethias
r0fl
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-04-18 22:38:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-04-18 22:34:01 (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 because the same five people have camped on two posts today. seriously, get instant messenger...
---
Wardy I don't suppose you'd be willing ot make another one of those flash animations, or give me the link of the one you did for FUPA? I'm to lazy to go look myself.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-04-18 22:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 because the same five people have camped on two posts today. seriously, get instant messenger...
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 22:13:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:29:36 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:24:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
I still don't understand where all this negativity towards me comes from. I don't have a single negative bone in my body and am as nice as pie to everyone on this forum.
--------
BAHAHA! Poor Sfaggy, so very very very very very desperate for attention...
------
Wow! I couldn't have been anymore sarcastic if I tried and STILL JonnyX thinks I was being serious.
Unbelievable.
Submitted by Gunslinger (user info) at 2006-04-18 20:26:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I got one man...but it's in french - that cool? hahaha
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 20:13:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This mean you're playing Bubs?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-04-18 19:44:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"My baby done left me,
My baby done went to the drive-in
Movie with somebody else,
And I feel like homemade shit."
-Ed Sanders & Tuli Kupferberg-
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-04-18 19:10:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm in.
p.s. I'll do mine after this one.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-04-18 18:31:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd sign up but according to almost everyone I know I'm 'unreliable'.
Submitted by Promethias (user info) at 2006-04-18 17:16:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ill try it out
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 17:04:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:12:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry about that, I'm a juvenile
sometimes when I've got nothing left I scream 'DICKEATER!'
sometimes its funny, sometimes people just look at me like I've lost it
---
My wife gets pissed at me because when I get bored late at night when the windows are open I'll just start yelling "cunnilingus" over and over in as cheery a voice as possible. She says something about neighbors or something... Not sure, she doesn't say it loud enough for me to hear over myself.
My grocery store/other public places word for this sort of endeavour is "scrotum"
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:29:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:24:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
I still don't understand where all this negativity towards me comes from. I don't have a single negative bone in my body and am as nice as pie to everyone on this forum.
--------
BAHAHA! Poor Sfaggy, so very very very very very desperate for attention...
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:22:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And it's about sharing cleavage with the masses.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:19:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:13:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
We're losing sight of what this competition is about.
It's about clever language. Good structure. And pointing out how Licious loves the Hulkster
INDEED.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:13:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We're losing sight of what this competition is about.
It's about clever language. Good structure. And pointing out how Licious loves the Hulkster.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:12:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry about that, I'm a juvenile
sometimes when I've got nothing left I scream 'DICKEATER!'
sometimes its funny, sometimes people just look at me like I've lost it
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:08:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you are teh funniest
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:04:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
a smoke
you mean smoke a pole?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 16:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just wanted to further confuse the whole thing with that comment is all.
I need a smoke. I haven't had one in four-ish years and I just had a huge craving for the first time in about two and a half.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:57:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:54:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
Sigh. I was replying to you, and punishing red, on the pie post, scourgey. I only have one hand with which to type, you know.
*splosh splosh squeak*
---
Squeak?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:54:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sigh. I was replying to you, and punishing red, on the pie post, scourgey. I only have one hand with which to type, you know.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:53:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:53:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
At least she still responds to you, young red.
She just ignores ME when I behave like this.
---
Licious does respond to me. She still hums that tune though. It is distracting.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:53:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
At least she still responds to you, young red.
She just ignores ME when I behave like this.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:52:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hulk Hogan Floor Polish! Apply with girlish glee!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:51:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHA You say that like your opinion matters to me, Jake.
Now if you'll excuse me, the cleaning lady has arrived with her cart and I'm going to secure some supplies for my afternoon diddle.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:50:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I bet Licious is reading this and chuckling. And humming a familiar haunting tune.
real american
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:49:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No I'm not.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:49:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:46:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:44:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
I want her to enter as well, but she made up some shit about 'work' or something. BUT, I distinctly heard this playing in the background: http://planetvids.com/html/Hulk-Hogan-the-Real-American.html
---
Along with a sound like someone plunging a mop into a half full bucket?
---
Dude, this crossed the line!
I'm serious here.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:44:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
I want her to enter as well, but she made up some shit about 'work' or something. BUT, I distinctly heard this playing in the background: http://planetvids.com/html/Hulk-Hogan-the-Real-American.html
---
Along with a sound like someone plunging a mop into a half full bucket?
sorry licious
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:44:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want her to enter as well, but she made up some shit about 'work' or something. BUT, I distinctly heard this playing in the background: http://planetvids.com/html/Hulk-Hogan-the-Real-American.html
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:42:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, no bamf. I like women, remember? Here's my wife: http://www.ubersite.com/m/82761
I get to have sex with her. HER. A WOMAN. I barely understand it myself.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:41:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh, the state???
That's different.
Just bill them whatever you want...in fact, add a couple of random zeros to the end of whatever number you agreed to and you'll get a check from them in 6 to 48 months...either for something close to 2 million dollars or for $37.77.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:39:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
some other themes for this
Loss of a woman to a friend (or loss of a man for scourge...whatever)
oh well that's all I've got
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish Licious would enter this competition. I may seek to bribe her with Hulk Hogan memorabilia. As if she didn't have it all already.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:35:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking sweet.
Snark's gonna rock this bitch. I'd lose to him just for the chance to read a couple of his fiction pieces.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:32:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-04-18 08:52:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm so in.
I'm also a sucker for punishment. I hate deadlines.
But yeah, I'm in, if you'll have me.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:31:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy - you might be right but I'm dealing with the state here...and they don't take kindly to threats. All your ducks have to lined up or they'll push you off another month.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:21:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude, he RUINED that flag. That fucking Commie red hammer sickle bitch got PWND by the headbutt of juctice.
I'mma go take some vitamins and pray right now.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:16:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:14:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
That was HIGHlarious, Jake, but Sacrilicious doesn't "splosh".
Even when the Hulk shakes his head and blows furiously from his mouth?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:14:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was HIGHlarious, Jake, but Sacrilicious doesn't "splosh".
And you, DEAR HUSBAND, sharing our porn?
What til they see what I share about you.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:13:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was typing a review asking for that link and you already beat me to it. That has been saved to my hard drive. Now to go back and finish watching it.
I knew I could count on O.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:11:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
badass- I believe the term is "Here's your invoice, if you have any questions, dial 1 800-fuck off and ask for Frank".
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:11:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Watch the video, scourge.
Try to contain yourself when he headbutts the Soviet flag.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:10:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:07:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
Actual transcription recorded from Licious' cubicle.
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
*splosh splosh*
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
*girlish squeak*
When it comes crashing down, and it hurts inside,
*Oooh yeah Hulk baby - hurts inside!*
ya' gotta take a stand, it don't help to hide,
Well, you hurt my friends, and you hurt my pride,
I gotta be a man; I can't let it slide,
*SLIDE IT IN DEEP HULKSTER!*
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
*OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH*
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA
This made my stomach hurt I laughed so hard. I actually heard the sound clip in my head.
-Sorry badass, no idea.
-Orgasmo, you must do this wrestling thingamajig.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:09:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha...she doesn't even need porn, red.
This is all she needs to watch to get her off: http://planetvids.com/html/Hulk-Hogan-the-Real-American.html
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:09:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not going up against Licious. She takes it too seriously. Proper piledrivers and whatnot.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For ravens it's an unkindness
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:07:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Would anyone be interested in an Uber wrestling federation?
I'm working on a little one-off something that's sort of got something to do with that - sort of - but all this Hogan talk's got me thinking about doing something even more stupid and even more involved.
Think kaos's Uber Assemble story, only with suplexes and not as good.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:07:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Actual transcription recorded from Licious' cubicle.
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
*splosh splosh*
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
*girlish squeak*
When it comes crashing down, and it hurts inside,
*Oooh yeah Hulk baby - hurts inside!*
ya' gotta take a stand, it don't help to hide,
Well, you hurt my friends, and you hurt my pride,
I gotta be a man; I can't let it slide,
*SLIDE IT IN DEEP HULKSTER!*
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
*OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH*
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:07:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
maybe y'all can help me.
I priced a change order for 331k two years ago
they accepted it just yesterday
I'm sending them an additional CO for 10% more based on inflation, rises in material costs, rises in delivery costs and so on.
there is a term for this pricing change...not inflation (as inflation really jsut applies to the cost of living)
what is the term?
I need to know quick so I can get my work done for today
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:06:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you guys want to bug me, you'll have to do better than this.
It's not a challenge, but I imagine it will turn into one, since you can't keep the luscious name of licious off your lips.
Carry on.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:05:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:04:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
The group noun for goldfinches is a 'charm'
---
For crows it's a 'murder'
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Where is the young lady in question?
My guess is diddling furiously to a copy of the last Wrestlemania event in the safety of her office cube.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:04:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The group noun for goldfinches is a 'charm'
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:03:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If there's ever an Uber Trivial Pursuit game, I'm on badass' team.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:03:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:00:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture is hideous, Mr Orgasmo sir. I can't even begin to wonder why she loves him so...
---
Well, red, I only report the story as it's told to me.
'Thunderlips' is, by the way, the most hilarious name ever.
---
It is. Which is why I was perturbed to discover that Licious actually changed her real name to Thunder Lips. I mean, a nick name is all very well, but a court sanctioned change of name? Lunacy really.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:02:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. For me I think that is why I have this platinum colored hair.
The airplane Buddy Holly died in was the "American Pie." (Thus the name of the Don McLean song.)
Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:00:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture is hideous, Mr Orgasmo sir. I can't even begin to wonder why she loves him so...
---
Well, red, I only report the story as it's told to me.
'Thunderlips' is, by the way, the most hilarious name ever.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 15:00:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:58:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hulk Hogan is a Pretty Man: http://www.fanboyplanet.com/chair/images/hulkhogan.jpg
---
All this time, Licious has kept this under wraps - and now her love for the LONGEST ARMS IN PROFESSIONAL SPORTS has been outed. I do wish she would wash his bandanas though, and not take her clothes off in a Hulk Hogan entering the ring stylee.
Talking of Hogan entering the ring....
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:58:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hulk Hogan is a Pretty Man: http://www.fanboyplanet.com/chair/images/hulkhogan.jpg
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:57:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:55:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:49:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is that the one where she dressed up as a Hulkamaniac and refused to leave the set? Just after that unsavoury incident with the cocaine, Hulk's dressing room and half a pound of german salami?
---
This is mostly correct with the exception being that it was actually braunschweiger (sp?)
Now, in Rocky III, she was ejected from the set for screaming 'Thunderlips I heart YOU' over and over, even when Hulk wasn't on set.
---
I must correct you Scourge old chap. She was ejected when the flow of excitement juice reached dangerous levels and literally shot poor Licious through the ceiling. Thunderlips indeed.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:55:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:49:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is that the one where she dressed up as a Hulkamaniac and refused to leave the set? Just after that unsavoury incident with the cocaine, Hulk's dressing room and half a pound of german salami?
---
This is mostly correct with the exception being that it was actually braunschweiger (sp?)
Now, in Rocky III, she was ejected from the set for screaming 'Thunderlips I heart YOU' over and over, even when Hulk wasn't on set.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Assault on Devil's Island (1997) (TV) (as Terry 'Hulk' Hogan) .... Mike McBride
... aka Shadow Warriors (video title)
---
Licious - what did you say about this being the bestest film ever?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:53:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Please supply us with Cliff-isms Mr. Mofo.
I'm bored out my skull.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:52:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SHAME.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:51:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was rubbish O. Bow your head in shame!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:51:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sacrilicious is the only person ever to laugh when Hulk Hogan punched the mime artist in Suburban Commando.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:50:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a picture of Hogan in a match he had with Jay Peg: http://wrestlingpicsny.tripod.com/bundyhulkwm2.jpg
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:50:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well i've been there before a few times.
my buddy went to College there, IUP and I hooked up with a girl that I went back to visit a few times.
yeah I have a lot of little knowledge tidbits, I'm like the Cliff Claven of uber, only better looking
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:50:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:42:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
This slid down a ways so repositioning for stagger. Also you had a couple new entrant requests:
Chroniclysm
CaptainThongs
--------------
That's MR. Captain Thongs to you, alien love slave.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:49:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:47:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, I hear she cried rivers at the grand opening of 'Mr. Nanny' when the 'Hulkster' walked near enough that she could smell his sweat.
She keeps a feather from one of his boas on her nightstand and uses it to tickle herself into a sexual frenzy every Monday night.
---
Is that the one where she dressed up as a Hulkamaniac and refused to leave the set? Just after that unsavoury incident with the cocaine, Hulk's dressing room and half a pound of german salami?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:49:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He calls that crease, 'The Tunnel of Love', Lishy.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:48:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I read that fact somewhere before badass. You seem to have a treasure trove of these little knowledge nuggets if I remember correctly.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:47:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
interesting fact about Punxatawny Phil, his little act doesn't take place in Punxatawny but rather Cobbler's Grove which is the next town over.
and there is a 30' solid wood groundhog statue in Punxatawny
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, I hear she cried rivers at the grand opening of 'Mr. Nanny' when the 'Hulkster' walked near enough that she could smell his sweat.
She keeps a feather from one of his boas on her nightstand and uses it to tickle herself into a sexual frenzy every Monday night.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:47:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:41:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
You know red, I heard that rumor myself.
Another interesting fact about Lish: She had a bit role in Hulks movie 'No Holds Barred' as an audience member at the big match. I hear SHE payed THEM to be in it just so she could be near him.
===========
FINE! IT'S ALL TRUE!
I want to lick him in that ridiculously deep crease where his handlebar moustache meets his cheek.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:46:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:44:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes. I see.
Well, The Punxatawney BlueJeans played against the Albany Nylons this past weekend. A wonderful time was had by all. We all drank beer(the good light yellow 'merican kind of course), killed terrorists, smoked cigarettes and ate hamburgers.
Then we all went home in our SUVs.
---
Ah - Licious would have tried to get a ride in Thunder, the amazing boat in Thunder in Paradise.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:44:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes. I see.
Well, The Punxatawney BlueJeans played against the Albany Nylons this past weekend. A wonderful time was had by all. We all drank beer(the good light yellow 'merican kind of course), killed terrorists, smoked cigarettes and ate hamburgers.
Then we all went home in our SUVs.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:42:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:41:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
You know red, I heard that rumor myself.
Another interesting fact about Lish: She had a bit role in Hulks movie 'No Holds Barred' as an audience member at the big match. I hear SHE paid THEM to be in it just so she could be near him.
---
I also hear that she paid to see Suburban Commando FIFTY EIGHT TIMES! They threw her out when people started complaining about the stickiness of the floor.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:42:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This slid down a ways so repositioning for stagger. Also you had a couple new entrant requests:
Chroniclysm
CaptainThongs
redskieslookfake
Stagger_Lee
Circe
Bubba2341
Brdn_Nkd
scourge
Orgasmatron
Coyote
Wardy
Stuch
Gank
Jack_McCallum
Sphagnum
badassmofo
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:41:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You know red, I heard that rumor myself.
Another interesting fact about Lish: She had a bit role in Hulks movie 'No Holds Barred' as an audience member at the big match. I hear SHE payed THEM to be in it just so she could be near him.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:39:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:28:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
Listen redskies, we let you babble about the Boobingham Wicket Masters against the Poofterglory Jabberwockies all day long. Let Lishy get squishy over wrestling if she wants.
Me, I hate that shit. She's a fanatic about it though.
----
The Boobingham Wicket Masters are in amazing form at the moment. They totally destroyed the Fotheringheugh Wanderers in the La De Da Cup. It was great. We had scones.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:39:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No overtime for me Shlong. I'm all tuckered out.
I knew the 'dipshit' would get at least a small nod of approval from you. I considered using 'mo as well, but didn't want to overkill.
I'll try harder next time sir.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:37:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I actually know who Hulk Hogan is. Is it true Licious wanted to star in Thunder in Paradise?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:37:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LET'S GO FLYERS
CLAP*CLAP*CLAP*CLAP*CLAP
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:35:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm in, young Stagger.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:32:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When PICK ON SACRILICIOUS TIME ends, let me know. I'm gonna chew some gum and maybe go tell some jokes to people who will appreciate them in the meantime.
LET'S GO FLYERS
CLAP*CLAP*CLAP*CLAP*CLAP
(yeah, I know)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:31:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The dipshit call DID give you the edge, albeit briefly, scourge...but you then ruined any lead you may have had by continuing to type "blah blah blah , blah blah blah blah sniffle, sniffle.
So perhaps, you two dorks need to go to overtime.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She told me she wants Hulk Hogan to adopt her and raise her as his daughter so she can train under him and become the womens champion.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Listen redskies, we let you babble about the Boobingham Wicket Masters against the Poofterglory Jabberwockies all day long. Let Lishy get squishy over wrestling if she wants.
Me, I hate that shit. She's a fanatic about it though.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:27:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate it way more than I hate your stupid football, Jake.
BUT NOW YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:26:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got a lecture by a hot girl at a party once about Brock Leshner or someone. Who had giant shoulder muscles. I have never been turned off so quickly. If she'd wapped out a dick I'd have been less repulsed.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:24:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:23:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Chris Jericho's hotter.
WHY DO I KNOW THIS? WHY?
---
Is this WWF? DAMN YOU ALL. SHUT UP. It's grown men grabbing each other and trying to sit on each other's faces.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:23:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Chris Jericho's hotter.
WHY DO I KNOW THIS? WHY?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:23:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What are you all gibbering about?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:21:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not an athlete, an actor. He's a professional wrestler.
I don't know if he's handsome or not. When I first saw that picture of you it reminded me of him, that's all.
You asked, so I answered.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:21:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He's a wrestler.
I'm jealous of you, badass. I hate wrestling SO MUCH, and I couldn't escape this information. How do you do it?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:16:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what is it that he does, sports of some type (that's my assumption...you said 'match')
I mean he seems like a fairly handsome man.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:16:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-05 17:32:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-05 17:29:17 (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you! That'll probably happen now.
---
Just keep your hands at 10 and 2, and your wits about you.
With any luck you'll avoid turning your face into an accordion against the wheel and will instead eat a bunch of glass on your way through the windshield.
Either way it's closed casket funeral for you, snookums.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are correct sir.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:10:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i'm assuming he's the one on the right?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Here badass:
Triple H: http://www.kevincaruso.com/kevin-caruso-triple-h.jpg
badassmofo: http://www.ubersite.com/m/84793
When is your next big match?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:08:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh...i'm...so...excited
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:03:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No. I'm leaving that one alone. I'm working on a project for badass.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 14:02:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That last review was awesome.
It was laden with so much hypocrisy and stupidity I just know that Scourge is going to seize upon it.
I gotta go for awhile. I'll be back.. maybe.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:59:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:57:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the closest that Sphag and I ever came to understanding and appreciating each other was when I told him how I wish he'd die in a car crash.
----
Now that review made me laugh. Link it please.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:59:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You know what?
I know it's selfish and probably unusual but the only person I try to make laugh around here is me. If something I did or said garners a response that makes me laugh, then I'm happy.
What that means is: I don't care what you think about me, you don't have anywhere near enough information to make any kind of accurate assessment. It's all about me getting a laugh, which I do.
The fact that I don't care about you, Scourge, is painful for you, I know. The problem is; I don't care about that. It's all about me.
There it is, the truth behind the laughter.
I actually don't mind creating something every now and then as well. Usually, it's designed to make me laugh but occassionally I feel like posting something different.
Also, I'm better than you. Just thought I'd toss that out there so you'd have a focal point for your rebuttal.
Man I hate you.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:57:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what the fuck is a Triple H?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:57:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the closest that Sphag and I ever came to understanding and appreciating each other was when I told him how I wish he'd die in a car crash.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:56:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm not reading all of the reviews below, for the first time in a long time.
But I'm in for the contest.
In case it hasn't already been mentioned, "RAPE" is a blues-worthy topic.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:55:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A draw?
I obviously won this. Did you see where I called him a dipshit? Recount the votes Triple H.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:53:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, well at least you know where I stand now.
I wish you'd taken the time to tell me what your position is. Meh, you probably did, I just couldn't be bothered reading it.
"Alot of people hate you!"
You say that like I care. I told some loser yesterday that I thought it to be quite intriguing that someone would "HATE" a person from an anonymous internet forum.
You don't think I'm funny, you want respond. I've heard it all before.
See you on MY next post, cockswallower.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yep, all fags.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:51:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
man I'm fucking torn
I mean scourge is right...Sphagnum you are a dipshit
But then again
Sphagnum is right too...scourge you are a whiny fuck
you both make compelling arguements
Imma hafta call this one a draw
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:50:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:43:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
At least this post is going to overtake that ugly cave troll's camwhore from yesterday.
AHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:48:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're ALL fags.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:47:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah you got me Sphaggy. I take EVERYTHING seriously here.
FOR EXAMPLE I HONESTLY THOUGHT THAT BADASS THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO HAVE MAN SEX. REALLY. AND HIS NAME IN REAL LIFE IS BADASSMOFO.
The games you play here aren't amusing is all. A lot of people fuck around on this site and it's funny as hell. You just come across as a dipshit when you do it. I'm not the only person who thinks so, not by a long shot, so I guess it must be that the crowd is wrong and you're right.
That must be it.
Do whatever you want on my posts, I might respond, I might not. Probably will, because I just have this thing about letting morons know what I think of them. It's a weakness.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:44:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Having even one post on most heated is making me feel dirty all over, so the next won't be til tomorrow. I'll give it that long to make sure I get everyone who's interested, then it's go time.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:43:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
At least this post is going to overtake that ugly cave troll's camwhore from yesterday.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:42:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll tell you one thing, this post has made me laugh... ALOT!
Was that the kind of reaction you expected when you posted it?
I thought so.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:41:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't wait to drop my first -2 on Scourge. I guess you'll post the brackets and the themes so we can camp that onto most heated as well.
Man, I'm camp.
ahhh... You know what I mean.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:39:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, looks like I'm going to end up with a bunch of themes here and pull 2 out of the hat for each round. So we could end up with things like Love/Drink, Doing Time/The Devil, etc.
Should be interesting.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:38:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:35:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
you guys are so cute, I'm getting y'all a toaster or a silver tea set
------
Don't ruin this for me, I've got him right where I want him.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:35:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you guys are so cute, I'm getting y'all a toaster or a silver tea set
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:33:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jesus Christ, man. You really need to learn how to read between the lines.
You wouldn't know what sarcasm was if it crawled up and raped you in the ear. The sooner you realise that nothing about this place should be taken seriously, the sooner you will begin to enjoy all the shenanigans again.
I get the impression that you have taken EVERYTHING that anyone has EVER said to be literal and serious. That's just fucking ridiculous. I want you to look at what people write from now on and immediately assume that they are being sarcastic or merely trying to entertain others with their reviews.
Can you do that for me, kiddo? Just try it for awhile. Start by going back and reading some of the reviews on this post.
Didn't think so, queerbait.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:28:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86769#1938395
You break my heart Sphaggy. You just break my heart. That's all. I tried loving you, it didn't work out.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:28:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
because man fucking is hot dude
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:27:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:21:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
2 to 1 that scourge catches first
over under on how many times the switch positions is 6
---
Nah, I'm an anal virgin and I shall die that way. Why does pointless internet bickering always provoke an interest in man fucking in you badass? I'm just curious...
Submitted by OneCheapGeek (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:26:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why did I read this whole thing?
I'd be in but I can't write. That, and I don't give a flying shit.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:26:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:21:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86747#1937208
Keep track of your own shenanigans Sphaggy, it's getting tiring to do all your leg work for you. You got associated by claiming it was your alter.
------
You mean to tell me that you found another example of my saying something on the internet that wasn't true? I'd cut my own throat with a butterknife if I was as gullible as you are, birdbrain.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:24:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:17:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're the one who searched me and my posts out dipshit. You wanna throw shit at me, expect to get it thrown back. It's that simple.
In this contest, I'll rate your posts fairly, you WON'T do the same. Everything else is the same old song and dance.
-----
I haven't really looked into it all that hard but I'm pretty sure I only remember rating 2 of your posts.
Your latest and the one before that. I may have rated your latest one 400 times but I rated it when It hit the front page.
If that is "searching you out", then I think you need to look up the words 'search', 'you' and 'out' up in the dictionary for dummies you have strapped to your wheelchair.
Also, this whole "You wanna throw shit, prepare to get it back" thing is utterly fucking juvenile. The only other users I know who subscribe to that theory are ETS and JonnyX.
Do you really want to be assosciated with those wankers?
I still don't understand where all this negativity towards me comes from. I don't have a single negative bone in my body and am as nice as pie to everyone on this forum.
Why don't you love me?
That's right, you're jealous of my manhood.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:21:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
2 to 1 that scourge catches first
over under on how many times the switch positions is 6
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:21:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86747#1937208
Keep track of your own shenanigans Sphaggy, it's getting tiring to do all your leg work for you. You got associated by claiming it was your alter.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:19:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's my once a week blues fix, I have the whole album on my iPod.
I like the idea of this contest, down and dirty themes...dispicable characters....hard luck...this is what life is about.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:18:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:17:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
you guys should date, or perhaps just angrily fuck each other.
Any takers, i'm giving odds on who's the pitcher and who's the catcher
---
What odds you offering?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:18:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, who the fuck is "Syndl" and how did I get assosciated with Him/Her, anyway?
Are you just making this shit up now, princess?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:18:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
14 players.
redskieslookfake
Stagger_Lee
Circe
Bubba2341
Brdn_Nkd
scourge
Orgasmatron
Coyote
Wardy
Stuch
Gank
Jack_McCallum
Sphagnum
badassmofo
Also, badass, I was listening to that album when I posted this. Oh yeah.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you guys should date, or perhaps just angrily fuck each other.
Any takers, i'm giving odds on who's the pitcher and who's the catcher
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:17:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're the one who searched me and my posts out dipshit. You wanna throw shit at me, expect to get it thrown back. It's that simple.
In this contest, I'll rate your posts fairly, you WON'T do the same. Everything else is the same old song and dance.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:09:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
You and Shlongy BOTH need a hobby Sphaggy.
I don't give a shit about where and how you spend your time.
------
Then why are we having this one-sided argument?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:14:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A little thing I'm going to do called
'I'm Bad Like Jesse James'
I'm bad
I'm bad
Like Jesse James, uh-huh
I had a friend one time
Least I thought I did
He come to me
Said, 'Johnny?'
Said, 'What man?'
'I'm outdoor'
I say, 'Yeah?'
I taken the cat in
Get him a place to stay
And I found out
He goin' 'round town
Tellin' ev'rybody that he
He got my wife
Then I gets mad
I goes to the cat
Like a good guy should
I said, 'Look man
'I'm gonna warn, you just one time'
Next time I warn you'
'I'm gonna use my gun'
'Cause I'm mad, I'm bad, like Jesse James
I'm so mad, I'm so mad.
I'm gonna ruin you this mornin'.
I've got three boys
Do my dirty work
Now, you don't see me
I'm the big boss
I do the payin' off
After they take care of you
In their on way
They may shoot you
They may cut you.
They may drown you
I just don't know
I don't care
Long as they take care of you
In their on way
I'm so mad, I'm bad this mornin', like Jesse James.
They gon' take you right down
By the riverside
Now four is goin' down
Ain't but three comin' back
You read between the line
We're gonna have a deal
'Cause I'm mad, I'm bad, like Jesse James.
They gonna tie yo' hands
They gonna tie yo' feet
They gonna gag your throat
Where you can't holler none
An cryin' won't help you none
Set you in the water
Yeah, the bubbles comin' up.
Whoa
Rrrrrrr
Rrrrrrr
Oh yeah, I'm so mad!
==================
Yeah Mang...I'm in!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:14:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Check out the heat on this?
The night is so black
That the darkness cooks.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:12:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So Scourge doesn't like the way I use Übersite because it's different to the way he does.
I don't think I'm going to bother caring about that.
I'm like a magnet, shithead. You just can't keep away from me.
Get a fucking sense of humour, you stupid cunt.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:12:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:09:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
I wanna be bad, bad like Jesse James
-----------------------
Chu wanna play? Come on, it'll be fun.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:11:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I believe you very much. <---may or may not be true
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:10:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I promise I'll stay away from it today, Scourge. <------ (May or may not be true)
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:09:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You and Shlongy BOTH need a hobby Sphaggy.
I don't give a shit about where and how you spend your time. The time you spend here is spent being a bitch, plain and simple. This is the only place, thankfully, that I have to deal with either one of you, and you both act like bitches here. All the time, constantly.
So, you both ARE bitches to me.
Good luck in this competition.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:09:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wanna be bad, bad like Jesse James
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:07:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Too easy
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:03:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
98.73% of my time spent on Uber is when I'm at work.
If that means that I have no life, what the fuck are you doing here?
The rest was written by you, therefore I didn't read it.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 13:02:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I expected them anyway Shlongy, since you've already been doing it. You're just a compact, Harrelson-ized version of Sphagnum.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, can't we all just relax? I like relaxing.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:56:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you need a hobby, Shlongy.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:56:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What happened here?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 11:18:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-17 13:26:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
Your posts are fucked.
Also, I like peanuts.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-17 13:23:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
--------> With that, I'm done with your ass on this post. I'll talk to you again when you -2 my next post without reading it.
------
Does that mean you said something on the internet that wasn't actually true?
Did you say something that you didn't actually mean?
Were you being untruthful?
You're a trolling sack-of-shit, by your reasoning.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:55:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, after THAT whine-a-thon, I know I'LL be swinging by to drop some -2's on you, scourge.
-2's and a smile.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:52:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just want to be sure you read this line Sphaggy:
'I'll rate your shit in this competition fairly if I can be bothered to read it.'
I want to retract the part about reading it. I will read and rate everything in this comp. Every single post. Fairly.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-18 12:49:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Guess I wasn't done with you after all.
=====
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-18 11:33:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
You know what, I'm actually not interested in this competition.
Too many people participating are under the misconception that I hate them and don't rate them 'fairly'.
-----
To echo Orgasmo, because of things like this:
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-13 16:51:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
I guess this COULD have been worthwhile.
I'll never know.
And this:
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-05 17:03:17 (#)
Ranking: -2
Art sucks balls.
People tend to view you as a trolling sack of shit with nothing to contribute.
You rate to fuck with people. That is all. To hear you talk about rating fairly...pfffffffft.
You came into the FUPA contest with an internet chip on your shoulder, accused me, along with half of the participants, of being a circle jerk (somewhat true) BEFORE THE CONTEST EVEN STARTED and proceeded to -2 the shit out of it.
My two posts since then you have dropped a deuce on with a comment about not even reading them(see above). In the interest of full disclosure, I retal rated you for it on one of your posts.
The contest would be better off without you because you will do the same thing here, and in the next one, and in the next one. The first less than perfect rating you get from somebody, you'll retal. You nmay try and justify your rating, though I doubt it, that isn't your usual modus operandi.
I GUARANTEE my first entry in this will have a -2 from you and if this user: syndl, is really your alter as you claim, I'll