Uber, Assemble!!! (part 7) THE END (1254 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: UberAssemble!!!
Rating: 1.98 on 62 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kaos-king (antius777) (View user info) at 2006-04-19 10:21:03 EDT
UBER HEADQUARTERS...
The portal cascaded open, a blue disk surrounded by crackling white lightning. It floated in the air about a foot off the ground, then slowly lowered into the dirt. Once it had burnt its way a number of inches in, the color of the disk twinkled into a paler shade.
The Ubermen stepped out onto the Compound yard with Bickerstaff and Istaros.
"Thank you for bringing us back," said BRDN NKD. "I don't know if I would have been able to."
"Of course," replied the tattooed emissary of Bickerstaff.
"Now what?" asked Munkeypants.
"Well," sighed Commander Rad, "First we check on the Professor to see if there has been any change. Then we get together as much weaponry as we can, get Orgasmatron, and have Istaros take us to Method."
"But we don't have any idea where the bastard is," said Mockidol.
"Actually," spoke up Axolotl, "I ran some equations based on the energy signature left behind when Urbane and the alters attacked. I'm pretty sure I've tracked Method's lair within a five mile approximation."
"So we're going to really do this, then?" questioned TigerLily, an eyebrow raised.
"Do we have a choice?" replied Rad.
"Good point," returned TigerLily.
"Um, guys," said Ghola shielding her eyes and looking towards the setting sun, "Were we expecting anyone?"
The Ubermen turned to see five black helicopters coming in from the west. They all had a large silver emblem on them. A stylized "M" for Method.
"Fuck!" swore Rad. "Mockidol, TigerLily, go get Orgasmatron! Ghola and Axolotl, go gather up as many..."
"Here comes Orgasmatron now!" yelled Mockidol, rushing towards the giant robot.
"TigerLily, go..."
"I'm on it, Commander!" replied TL heading off after Mockidol.
"Okay, Istaros, can you and Bickerstaff hold off the..."
Rad was interrupted by the sound of gunfire and piercing screams.
The Commander spun in time to see what was left of the body of Mockidol collapse to the ground. TigerLily had rolled out of the way of the first blast, but before his eyes he watched her get caught in the second. Rad heard himself scream.
Then BRDN NKD was there. He teleported in and grabbed TigerLily and was vanishing. But not before, he too, was struck with Orgasmatron's awesome firepower.
The alien and the bionic woman appeared beside the Ubermen, both of them covered in blood. TigerLily was moaning and BRDN wasn't moving. Orgasmatron was marching towards them from one direction, the helicopters landing on the other.
"We're pinned in!" screamed Munkeypants.
"The fucking robot's turned against us!" swore Ghola.
"Istaros, can't you..." Axolotl said.
The monk sighed. "No. You saw how long the spell took to prepare to get us here. I need at least a half an hour to achieve such a thing."
"I'll kill Jackson for this," growled Rad.
The Ubermen watched as the copters landed. They saw Method jump out and direct a number of villains to follow him. The rest began to advance towards the Ubermen's position. Orgasmatron loomed behind them.
"If Method gets to Professor Bart-Bart and gains possession of the Uber Crystal..." Axolotl started.
"Fuck that," said TigerLily from the ground beside the alien. "BRDN, you alive?"
"I don't think so," replied the alien, trying not to laugh as blood spilled out of his mouth.
"We'll take care of that god damn walking weapon. You four follow up and get inside the east entrance and get to the Professor. If Bickerstaff is so fucking great, he can deal with Method's lackeys," said TigerLily, her breathing heavy.
"TL, don't do this!" exclaimed Rad, reaching out, knowing what she had in mind.
TigerLily slapped his hand away. "Rad, BRDN and I are both all ready dead. We're just too stubborn to fall over." She looked over at the alien. "You ready?"
BRDN NKD nodded with a solemn smile on his lips and they disappeared.
"NO!" screamed Rad.
"What is she..." asked Munkeypants.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
TigerLily and BRDN NKD teleported right beneath the legs of Orgasmatron. She looked over at the alien to say goodbye, but his eyes stared out vacantly. The last transport had been too much for him in his weakened state. TL sighed and ripped off her bionic leg. Punching in the code near the ankle with one hand, she gave a middle finger to the robot that tilted down to look at her.
"Yeah, yeah... fuck off," she said.
The fusion powered leg exploded mostly upwards as she had aimed it. TigerLily, BRDN NKD and Orgasmatron were vaporized.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
The Ubermen picked themselves up off the ground from behind Istaros's force field. It had shielded them from the worst of the blast. Rad swore again and looked to see Method's people getting up and making their way towards them.
"Oh god, TigerLily!" cried Munkeypants.
"No time for that now," yelled Rad. "Bickerstaff, can you..."
"He will keep these wicked ones at bay. Go. Find your Professor and deal with Method," said Istaros.
Commander Rad, Munkeypants, Axolotl and Ghola took off for the east entrance. The tattooed monk watched them go with a sad look upon his face. He turned to the greatest warrior the planet had ever seen and placed his hand upon the man's shoulder.
"I know, old friend. But soon it will be over and you will be able to finally rest," said Istaros.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
The four Ubermen busted through the doors and entered the secondary ready room. It was empty. Rad tossed the Boy Genius two hand guns. Axolotl flipped off the safety on each and brought them up. Ghola had out both her katana and her wakasashi. Munkeypants had morphed both hands into lion claws. Rad checked the charge on his pulse cannon and motioned to the remainder of his team.
Forward.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
"What's this shit?" laughed Sphagnum walking up with his accomplices.
Bickerstaff stood there completely at ease, his hands at his sides. He surveyed the approach of the men and women with no expression on his face. Istaros was a few feet behind him, his hands folded at his waist.
"We have work to do," sighed Ajanssen aiming his gun and pulling off two shots.
Bickerstaff's hand came out. Fast. Then it was back at his side. Without ceremony, he tossed the bullets in the grass.
"Dude, that's... eh... wow, that was Bosh!"
"Well then," snorted Caulaincourt, "Perhaps a worthy opponent."
The Quebec Quartermaster marched forward to meet his adversary. He positioned himself into a fighting stance. Then he advanced, bringing punches and kicks towards Bickerstaff.
Bickerstaff did not move.
Then Caulaincourt shot a fist where Bickerstaff's head was suppose to be. But it wasn't there anymore. Caul's opponent had dodged it, and now he had one hand gripping Caul's wrist and another on Caul's shoulder.
"Uh..." said Cauliancourt trying to break free.
Bickerstaff ripped the Quebec Quartermaster's arm off and in the same motion, plunged it through his enemy's chest.
Multiple screams and curses went up from the villains and Caulaincourt's body hit the ground.
Stabkill and Badass Julie ran forward, each brandishing a sword. Bickerstaff grabbed each weapon by the blade and swung them around, tripping the two. As Stabkill spun to his feet, the ultimate warrior reached out and pierced his hand into the villain's back. He ripped out Stabkill's spine, turned, and whipped Julie in the head with it so hard it cracked her skull.
DOS called down lightning, Shadow hurled balls of concentrated darkness, Retrospect willed de-evolution, Sphagnum sent out waves of the purest hate.
Bickerstaff took a step forward.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Alters were everywhere. Obviously, they were getting close.
The four remaining Ubermen kept battling their way through their own Compound, trying to make their way to Professor Bart-Bart's study where he had been in seclusion for months. They had no idea what state he was in, only that he had put up some form of protective shield around the room that no one had been able to penetrate. However, if Method got through and got his hands on the Uber Crystal...
The Ubermen were cutting through the alters when a laugh echoed out down the adjunct hallway. Ghola let out a scream of rage and bolted in the direction of the laughter. Rad called out for her, but the little ninja was gone.
"What the hell was that all about?" yelled Munkeypants while using an alligator tail to smash a few more alters.
"Sacrilicious, no doubt," replied Rad blasting away. "She's Ghola's mortal enemy."
"Why?"
"Sacrilicious is Ghola's ex-wife," replied Axolotl firing his handgun into an alter's head at point blank range.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
"Where are you, you fucking whore!" screamed Ghola.
"What's the matter, wifey?" asked Sacrilicious hurling a piece of the Compound at Ghola's back, dropping the little ninja. "Not up for a smooch for old time's sake?"
Ghola picked herself up and retrieved her katana. "You were my partner. Both as a hero and as a civilian. You gave it all up for power - the power to cause disease. And it rotted away your soul."
"Always the drama queen!" Sacrilicious laughed.
"Your power doesn't work on me, remember bitch? Ninja training schooled my mind to be protected from psionic attacks."
"Of course. I went to the same ninja school. It's how we met, isn't it?"
Ghola tossed her sword off to the side and removed her belt of throwing stars. Sacrilicious removed her cloak. The former lovers faced each other, fists raised.
"Let's do this, cunt," smiled Ghola.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Sassmaster felt a snap, realized something felt funny, then everything went black.
Bickerstaff flipped Sassmaster's body around and brought it down on the back of Filthy Assistant, who was trying to get up. The force broke her spine in half, and both villains lay in a pile. He stepped over the body of DOS, whose face had been caved in.
All that was left was Bosh, Sphagnum and...
Mr. Cancer screamed out from behind him. "I have your monk friend! If you don't let us go, I'll infect him!"
Bickerstaff turned to see the situation of Istaros. His old friend was held by the neck. The monk looked quite bored.
Bickerstaff shrugged.
Istaros rolled his eyes.
The monk's hand shot back, incredibly fast, his two fingers penetrating the socket of Mr. Cancer's right eye. The villain screamed and let go, at which point Istaros calmly wrapped one arm around Mr. Cancer head and snapped his neck. He adjusted his robes and glanced back to Bickerstaff.
"This is so, so not Bosh!" exclaimed the doomed assassin.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Commander Rad, Munkeypants and Axolotl ran down the length of the hallway. They hadn't seen any alters in a few minutes and that worried Rad. They were getting quite close to the Professor, and he hoped that nothing cataclysmic awaited them. If only they could make it there before Method and his...
*CRACK*
Rad fell backwards, blood gushing from his nose. He looked up just in time to roll away from a huge metal foot coming down on his head. He heard Axolotl firing, but he also heard the bullets bouncing off the steel hide of Skrapmetal.
Although bullets may not have been a concern for the large cyborg, Munkeypants in the form of a grizzly bear was. She went at him full force, knocking him back down the hall way in the direction they had came. As Rad was getting up, he felt warm metal pressed against his temple.
"I'm sorry it had to be this way, Rad," said Wardy. "Now tell your so-called 'Boy Genius' to drop his guns."
Rad said nothing.
"Do it Rad, and maybe the two of you can walk away from this. Even your enhanced red skin can't protect you from a shot this close. Tell the kid to drop them."
"Axolotl," said Commander Rad, then pausing. "... Fire."
Wardy's bullet grazed the side of Rad's head as the Boy Genius pumped four in the mad scientist's chest.
"You okay, Commander?"
"I'll be fine, we have to go."
"What about Munkeypants? Or Ghola?" asked Axolotl.
"They've got the other two. It's only Method left now," replied Rad.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Down in the rec room, two ninjas stumbled circles around each other. Sacrilicious had broken her hand and had dislocated her ankle. Ghola had lost some teeth and shattered her elbow. They both smiled at each other. Then fists punched and feet kicked at a rapid pace.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Bickerstaff dragged the body of Sphagnum over to the rest. Bosh was still spraying blood all over the broken face of Professional Peon. The great warrior tossed the corpse of the Hate Monger on top and calmly walked over to his voice.
Istaros sighed when he saw the look of regret on Bickerstaff's face. "Our job here is done, old friend. Let the others fulfill their destinies. There are only a few more minutes left."
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
The sight itself was somewhat ridiculous. A large cyborg doing battle with a brown grizzly bear. But between the sparks and coolant fluid from Skrapmetal and the blood and fur from Munkeypants, the scene was quite grim really. In the end, it came to one major difference between the two. Skrapmetal battled for his life. Munkeypants battled to save tomorrow.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Method clasped the Uber Crystal Shard he had stolen off Gascs in his hand so hard it drew blood. He didn't notice. He created alters, thousands upon thousands. Almost a million. He used their strength, their allegiance, their devotion to beat against the shield that Professor Bart-Bart had erected around his study.
He felt it weaken. He felt it crack. The King of Alters felt it crumble.
He stood there laughing at his success. He thought of the once proud and powerful Professor now cowering in his study like a frightened child. He thought of what he would do with the powers given to him by the entire Uber Crystal.
As he reached out to place his hand on the knob for the door, one of his alters jumped behind him to intercept a blast from a pulse cannon. Method closed his eyes and sighed. It was always something, wasn't it? He turned about as Commander Rad bellowed out his name.
"I'm right here, Rad," said Method smiling. "No need to yell."
"You fucking madman, I'll..." screamed Rad firing off his pulse cannon again.
Two more alters took the blows.
"As much as I would like to stay and play with you and little Axoltl, I'm afraid I have business elsewhere with slightly more important people," replied Method.
Alters filled the hallway in front and behind Rad and Axolotl.
"Enjoy yourself, prison guard," said Method mockingly as he entered the Professor's study.
"No!" yelled Rad rushing forward, firing his pulse cannon with one hand and swinging his electric charged baton with the other.
"Commander, get in there! I'll try to hold them off!" screamed the Boy Genius.
"Axolotl, you can't..."
"Shut up and switch me weapons!"
The last two heroes did, and Rad looked at the young team member.
"Just fucking go. Somebody has to stop that asshole," said Axolotl pumping the charge on the pulse cannon.
Rad turned away and began to fight. He tried to make every shot count. Half way through the horde, he ran out of ammo. He swung his baton with all the force he could muster. He wouldn't look back to see how Axolotl was doing. He didn't want to know. But he knew he was getting closer to the study doors.
Closer.
Closer.
He dove through the arms of the last few alters into the study and into...
Absolutely nothing.
There was no study. There was no room at all. No walls, no ceiling or sky. No ground. Everything was white, illuminated by an unknown source. It was just like from that movie about a world created by computers. It was like something had...
"Rad!" screamed Method, hoisting the Uberman up by his uniform.
"What is this?" screeched the King of Alters into Rad's face. "Where is that damned..."
Rad responded by punching Method in the throat.
He dropped Rad, but before the Commander could get up, Method swung a kick around and caught the Uberman in the side. Method went to kick Rad again, but the Commander caught his foot and threw Method off balance. Rad was up, only to see Method flip to his feet as well.
Rad came in swinging his electric baton, but Method blocked him at the wrist and took a punch at Rad in the torso. The Commander dodged the blow and brought his palm up to meet Method's chin. The King of Alters staggered back, and Rad lunged forward. Method dropped low and swept his leg out, bringing Rad down.
Both men were on their feet again when there was a flash of blinding light. Covering their eyes, and blinking back sight once the light was gone, a figure stood a few feet away from them. He looked from one to the other, then took a swig from his beer bottle.
"Professor!" exclaimed Rad.
"Bart!" swore Method.
"Um, what the hell are you two doing here?" asked Professor Bart-Bart.
"I want that fucking Uber Crystal, and I'll..." started Method.
His shadow selves, his alters, all appeared around him and began tearing at him, ripping at him. He screamed something as more and more alters joined in the mutilation. The last thing Rad saw was Method face being peeled off before the "King Of Alters" was lost beneath a pile of shadows.
And then there was nothing.
"Well, I guess this proves it. The experiment is over," sighed the Professor.
"What the hell just happened?" asked Rad.
"I really didn't want it to come to this, but I guess I knew it was going to. What a waste. Oh well, I guess I'll just create another universe where things aren't as..."
"Professor, what are you talking about?" questioned Rad, his concern growing. "Another Universe? What the fuck are you..."
"Too much individual power and free will, I suppose. That Gascs didn't help. Uber Crystal... what a stupid idea! What was I thinking?" mused the Professor taking another swig of his beer.
"Bart!" yelled Rad.
"Oh!" said Professor Bart-Bart with surprise. "Are you still here? Must be because you're outside the basic structure of the reality. That's interesting. So you still don't get it, huh?"
"Professor, I have no idea what's going on," sighed Rad.
"Brave, loyal, dedicated, just. But I did give most of the smarts to Axolotl. Didn't it ever occur to you why a teenager with no other meta human ability other than being really, really intelligent was part of the Ubermen?"
"Um..."
"Exactly. And it's not as if other aspects didn't try and warn you. Firefly did show up and tell you the 'end was near' or some such horseshit," said Bart.
The Professor took another drink and continued. "Rad, this whole thing has been ridiculous. Stupid names for lame super heroes doing pointless battles with generic bad guys. It was all an experiment, a test. I just wanted to see if I could do it. I divided my consciousness into six billion parts. To a handful, I gave powers and/or purpose. The Uber Crystal is just a trinket I bought at a head shop."
"Rad," said Professor Bart-Bart looking the Commander straight in the eyes, "You are all just my alters."
"No," muttered Rad stumbling back. "You're lying. You... you've gone insane!"
"I'm sorry, but it's the truth," said Bart pleasantly.
"But Ghola and Axolotl... Munkeypants..."
"Oh, they're all gone now. I've erased that world completely. Once you and Method broke through my shield I realized I had given you all too much power. Nope, I'm going to have to start all over again. Maybe scale it down a bit."
"No," said Rad. "You couldn't have... I won't let you... no."
"Too late," said Professor Bart-Bart finishing off his beer.
"NO!" screamed Commander Rad, running towards the Professor, his electric baton crackling with energy.
Bart Cilfone, creator of the Uberverse, just smiled sadly...
User Reviews
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-01-24 17:22:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*creativity.
Dammit!
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-01-24 17:21:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ah, so much creatively freely blown like a moneyshot on the face of Uber.
what?
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-12-08 08:06:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
~OathMeal Approved~
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-04-23 22:30:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lovely
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-04-22 18:15:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this was awesome. but i wasn't in it at all :(. even hilarity was a freakin blurb in this dammit and i've been around longer. way to make a girl feel loved.
sidenote: i saw a license plate with BARTC on it. prolly shoulda jacked it and mailed it as a stalker present to please the ubergod.
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-04-21 15:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was awesome, but one review made me laugh harder than the whole story.
==========================================================
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:28:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaah dude im sorry, i scrolled down before finishing, and blew a snot rocket at that picture
hahahahaahah
==========================================================
Sometimes it's the simple things in life.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-21 12:53:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-04-08 00:45:53 (#)
Ranking: 1
Honest advice - don't drop forty characters into a story in one page of material. The story can not really progress meaningfully in any way, and when they are just introduced BAM-BAM all it seems like is name dropping, not any actual examination of how you see any of us.
-----
Eat those words, dickbrain.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-04-20 04:48:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wonder if Bart's read these...
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-04-19 21:51:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 14:42:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:52:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCKING AWESOME
<EJACULATES>
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2006-04-19 20:43:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i finally died!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:26:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I might do it for fucking up this poor boys streak
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:13:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
but will you do it before i even know what hit me? will it be with an AK-47? because THAT i just couldn't deal with. kill me if you must, but please, don't do it with overgrown thumbnails
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:11:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
poor Georgey
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 19:04:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'LL KILL U BOTH
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 18:58:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it is NOT!
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-04-19 18:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
he doesn't have much face for his head does he
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-04-19 18:54:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HA HA HA That drawing of Method is SPOT ON!
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-04-19 18:47:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Cool as shit.
I get in a fight with a powerful woman who changes into a grizzly bear, I use all my superpowers in an attempt to conquer, I am sorely injured and I do grievous injury, and in the end I still have to ask if I won. And before I am answered, someone changes the rules of of war so my previous battles are rendered meaningless.
It's like being married.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-04-19 18:26:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh heh, I liked the nihilstic ending.
Submitted by mockidol (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:47:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'M DEAD!!!!!!!
sweet.
This series was kick ass anti.
like you havn't heard that already.
congrats.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:39:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*speaking from beyond the grave*
I WANT MY DEATH AVENGED!
Submitted by Webered (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:24:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:14:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Learn this quick...
*Respect the elders and don't talk shit.*
Dropping -2's on a good post is a great way to get your ass booted.
Notice how I'm dropping a negative two. That's because I have over 100 entries on Ubersite and this post was shit.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Dropping a -2 on any post soley because you didn't like the rating they gave someone else is a great way to make yourself look retarded.
And congradulations on your 100 entries, I'm sure they've brought happiness in the shit-storm you call a life.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-19 16:05:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
great pic too - its my computer's background pic right now
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:48:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you for not using "Average" in this one.
God show man!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:42:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And another for you.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:01:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
So, I was under the impression me and Shitfuck were going to bang some tards. What happened with that?
------
HAHAHA!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:28:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WOW!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:07:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Teh Lord BartBart giveth, and the Lord BartBart taketh away...
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-19 15:03:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:37:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
And another +2 for the sheer awesomeness of this series.
If anyone on Uber could turn this into a cartoon book...I'd buy it.
---
AND
One last rating.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-04-19 14:45:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-04-19 14:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:52:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCKING AWESOME
<EJACULATES>
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:58:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ace
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:49:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
KICK ASS!
I knew I was an alter. I knew it.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:41:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was very...
Bosh.
BOSH WOO
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:40:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kick ass.
Killed by TL's bionic leg, how beautiful.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Bickerstaff turned to see the situation of Istaros. His old friend was held by the neck. The monk looked quite bored.
Bickerstaff shrugged.
Istaros rolled his eyes."
hahahaha... funny thing is, that pretty much describes my personality perfectly
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-04-19 13:01:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So, I was under the impression me and Shitfuck were going to bang some tards. What happened with that?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:53:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
They both smiled at each other. Then fists punched and feet kicked at a rapid pace.
===========================
Oh, fuck yes. There is NO better way for me to have gone out. Always swinging. It's the way I would have wanted it.
This series was awesome.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:46:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dude, have another
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:37:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And another +2 for the sheer awesomeness of this series.
If anyone on Uber could turn this into a cartoon book...I'd buy it.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:36:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PLEASE tell me there's an epilogue!
I wanna know what Bart's gonna do next!
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:35:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHHHH!!! I'M NOTHING MORE THAN A CONSTRUCT!! I KNEW IT!!!!!!
good show
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:25:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sheer awesomeness.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-04-19 12:03:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome fucking ending. This was a fantastic series. I loved the comic book story telling and the way you assigned the teams and powers.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:33:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahah.
I love you so much.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:25:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still trying to figure out how my face got broken.
I mean... more so than it already is.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:21:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:04:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
"I'm sorry it had to be this way, Rad," said Wardy. "Now tell your so-called 'Boy Genius' to drop his guns."
after this bad ass line, you kill me? oh fuck you, you fucking bastard. i would've fucked his shit up real bad...
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Sorry Wardy, eveybody had to die. I had to have Munkey and Ghole occupied, and the alters had to be attacking someone, somewhere. I wanted to demonstate that Rad's character didn't give a fuck, and that Axolotl had some usefulness other than just being smart.
At least you didn't get torn apart by Bickerstaff, I guess...
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:05:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm so happy I got to see Tiger without her leg on before I died.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:04:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"I'm sorry it had to be this way, Rad," said Wardy. "Now tell your so-called 'Boy Genius' to drop his guns."
after this bad ass line, you kill me? oh fuck you, you fucking bastard. i would've fucked his shit up real bad...
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:02:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-04-19 11:01:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just drew this out this morning. I had another version half-way done, that was an actual battle image... but it kinda sucked. I tossed it and did this one instead. I knew Rad had a para-military outfit on, and I pictured Method wearing an outfit similar to Mr. Sinister from the X-Men comics.
I can see the roboty-thing, Method. I was unsure how to draw out your powers working.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:56:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I look like I'm doing 'the robot' in that picture, like that crackhead guy from The Chapelle Show
Love it
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:52:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCKING AWESOME
<EJACULATES>
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:42:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dude this wasnt not not bosh
haha im just kidding
one for the green thumb, ya know?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I loved the easygoing beer swilling by bart.
Awesome ending. Awesome.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:31:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hells yes.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:31:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i willed de-evolution. sweet!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hehehe.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:29:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:28:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It started out as a joke...
I'm not really sure why it changed...
Needless to say, this series became something else entirely. The more I wrote, the more I began to enjoy the story that was unfolding. And this was the way it had to end. Everyone had to die. I had to kill everybody off to be fair, and honestly, it was the only thing that made any sense.
My apologies to Rad and Method. I hope the illustration does you both justice.
Thanks to all of you, Ubersite. Because without you, obviously, this could not have been written. I haven't had this much fun killing people off since my "Tales Of New Hell" series.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-04-19 10:28:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaah dude im sorry, i scrolled down before finishing, and blew a snot rocket at that picture
hahahahaahah