Dean Kamen and the Two-Wheeled Electric Ego (547 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: -0.44 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SoSomething (View user info) at 2006-04-27 09:06:37 EDT
Dean Kamen thinks we need an extremely expensive and inefficient electronic personal conveyance to get around.
I think Dean Kamen is stupid.
Ok, not actually "stupid" per se, but he's one of those inventive folks with book smarts leaking out of his ass but without the common sense of a non-scented tissue. To further apply the metaphor, that combination just makes a big mess...
...and a big mess is exactly what I would call the Segway. It's a $5,000 piece of intellectual diarrhea that should have been wiped up and disinfected years ago, yet it, and it's "visionary" inventor Dean Kamen, keep popping back up as if to say "You haven't heard the last of me! I'm independantly wealthy and will continue to pour money into this cesspool of an idea until it coagulates into some kind of market willing to buy my piece of shit!"
Give it up, Mr. Kamen. It wont. There is no market for your Segway. No one with 5 large to spend is going to drop it on a 2-wheeled stand-up electric cart that is only designed to go where anyone with legs to stand on it could walk for free. Go away. Yes, we know the technology is kind of cool, and the gryoscope-balance thingy is very neat with the leaning and the rolling, but you forgot one really important aspect of a revolutionary new product: A FUCKING POINT.
There are three reasons people walk from one place to another:
A. It's a short distance and not suitable for a motor vehicle or bicycle.
B. It doesn't cost money to walk.
C. They want the exercise.
Where does the Segway fit here? It's not any more practical for traveling short distances than a bike, it requires a very costly investment to the average consumer, and it completely negates any of the health benefits of walking. What's left?
"...but it's got this cool gyroscope thingy."
And don't forget the cup holder, Mr. Kamen, since our hands would be occupied with the handlebars of this rediculous thing.
In CNN.com's July 4th article, this guy is quoted as saying "When we invented the locomotive, the airplane and the automobile we had to put in an infrastructure. The infrastructure for the Segway already exists -- it's called a city."
Very fucking clever, you arrogant twat. We know what a city is.
There is a big distinction between the inventions you mention and the Segway that you missed - the locomotive, car, and airplane each were designed and implemented to satisfy an economic NEED. Our country was growing, and our economy was becoming more specialized by location. People needed more to live and succeed than what was readily available in their area - hence long-distance freight trains, cargo planes, and passenger vehicles to get people from where the live to where they work. We built an infrastructure to support these innovations because their obvious potential justified the cost.
The Segway does not satisfy any need. Hell, it barely satisfies a want! "It travels on sidewalks and roads, and we already have those things" is hardly a justification for the cost. Get a grip, Dean Kamen. Just because you invented it does not mean anyone needs it. Just because you developed the technology does not make you a genuis visionary mastermind. Divorce yourself from your egomaniacal drive to see this thing succeed and move on to something worthwhile.
User Reviews
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:53:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:13:45 (#)
Ranking: 0
Once again, Tim, you manage to completely miss the point. I'm stunned, really.
Before it was released, Kamen claimed the Segway would "change the world in ways no other invention ever had." It was supposed to be the new "everything." It's a $5000 toy. I doubt he's made much money on it. I doubt he has recovered his R&D, given that it was in the works for years. I'm not saying he isn't brilliant and he hasn't invented some great things but really.... The Segway will change the world? Come on.
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you are retarded.
what the fuck is your problem with me?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-28 01:58:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I've seen better, right here:
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=segway_more_complicated_than_it_needs_to_be
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-04-27 13:25:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HOLY SHIT WERE ALL GOING TO BE RIDING GUNDAMS SOON<
WOOT!!!
Submitted by sosomething (user info) at 2006-04-27 13:24:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
(in reference to my comment below) I'm talking about the Japanese leg chair, not the Kamen invention (though both have a practical use).
Submitted by sosomething (user info) at 2006-04-27 13:17:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
His iBot had more potential, but has been rendered obsolete already by the Japanese.
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Now THAT is an innovation with some real-world potential. It is fulfilling an existing need. Cool link.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:17:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here we go. http://msnbc.msn.com/id/12497049/
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:16:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And they changed that link since I emailed it out yesterday. fuckin-A.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:16:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
His iBot had more potential, but has been rendered obsolete already by the Japanese. http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/photospecials/graph/photojournal/1.html
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:13:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Once again, Tim, you manage to completely miss the point. I'm stunned, really.
Before it was released, Kamen claimed the Segway would "change the world in ways no other invention ever had." It was supposed to be the new "everything." It's a $5000 toy. I doubt he's made much money on it. I doubt he has recovered his R&D, given that it was in the works for years. I'm not saying he isn't brilliant and he hasn't invented some great things but really.... The Segway will change the world? Come on.
Submitted by hyprspacd (user info) at 2006-04-27 12:01:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah but the Ibot mobility device is an astounding invention.
Submitted by sosomething (user info) at 2006-04-27 10:35:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
More fun Seqway facts: There are independant computers for each wheel. The computers, besides determining the behaviour of the wheels, also record the inputs and outputs of the sensors and motors for several hour's use. These recordings are downloadable, and they can be played back on a simulator. If you're on a Segway and you are injured, the manufacturer will download the stored information and can use it to 'play back' your path for several hours (independant of actual location, of course).
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That sounds more like taking every opportunity to limit liability than concern for user safety, IMO.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-04-27 10:03:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
More fun Seqway facts: There are independant computers for each wheel. The computers, besides determining the behaviour of the wheels, also record the inputs and outputs of the sensors and motors for several hour's use. These recordings are downloadable, and they can be played back on a simulator. If you're on a Segway and you are injured, the manufacturer will download the stored information and can use it to 'play back' your path for several hours (independant of actual location, of course).
And you thought the 'black box' in cars was bad.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:55:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aye, the C5 was even more idiotic than this
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:52:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/2989000.stm
If George Bush fell off one of these then you won't catch me buying one. If the cleverest most influencial man in the world can't handle it's gyro thingy then I'll be falling off all over the fucking place.
Oh...and Sinclair C5.
Submitted by sosomething (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:47:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Of course he has made money on it - it only proves the gullibility of affluent people with more money than sense.
It's a toy.
But it's marketed as some kind of urban savior for the common man.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:39:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
forgot the link that proves my last sentence obviously sarcastic:
http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/8.09/kamen_pr.html
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:39:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yeah segway sure sucks. he's made money on it. what a retard.
he's never invented anything else worthwhile either.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:31:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The Segway has only been around for what...5 years?
Submitted by sosomething (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:19:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I guess we'll have to wait until this trend is emulated by the inner city youth. At least then it will be really easy to run up, knock them off, and steal all their bling.
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That picture makes it look like he's playing a trumpet right into the guy's nose.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:14:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
actually, i saw hulk hogan on one too.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-04-27 09:12:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU OBVIOUSLY DONT LIVE IN THIS SOCIETY OF LAZY, GET-THERE-QUICK TYPE FOLKS.
there is a market, rich people.
people i've seen with segways...
1) p. diddy
2) shaq
3) G.O.B. from Arrested Development
AND THATS TO JUST NAME A FEW.
think about inner city mail carriers and police officers. there is a market and I WANT ONE OF THOSE FUCKIN THINGS BAD!