I'm Gonna Kill That Woman - Round 2 Matchups and Theme (3867 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.64 on 238 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stagger Lee (View user info) at 2006-05-01 01:45:48 EDT
Well, that was an excellent first round. Very well played, everyone. For details on the competition structure and rules, see the previous post. Everyone who didn't make it is encouraged to write exhibition pieces based on this round's theme and post them with the IGKTW Round 2 (Exhibition) tag.
All ratings were collected and adjusted to remove trolls and alters by everyone's favourite Geordie who already cries himself to sleep at night over the loss of Alan Shearer, redskieslookfake, as I was drunk at the specified deadline and would have fucked it up anyway. Many thanks to him for his effort, and he'll be posting the Magic Spreadsheet he used so there is no confusion.
As indicated in the reviews on the last post, the two double forfeits opened up two slots for highly rated runners up (and I STILL couldn't get through).
All entries can be found here: http://www.ubersite.com/u/redskieslookfake/l/igktw
Theme for this round: Preachers and Vengeance
Entries from this round will be found here: http://www.ubersite.com/u/redskieslookfake/l/igktw2
Adjusted ratings:
Coyote 1.958
Chroniclysm 1.523
Coyote stole into Chronic's house under cover of darkness and buried a screwdriver in his throat.
scourge 1.821
r0fl 1.965
In the battle of no capital letters, r0fl bought scourge a drink and slipped poison in it, but scourge was just too damn hardcore to go down that easy, and both of them advance. Scourge claims the 2nd available runner-up spot.
BigMike 1.894
Orgasmatron 1.991
Just when this battle looked set to go BigMike's way, O-Tron pulled out an unexpected prose knife and slipped it between Mikey's ribs, leaving him broken and bloody on the floor. However, BigMike dragged himself to a phone and got medical attention, limping into the second round. Both advance; BigMike claims the original 1st-placed runner-up spot.
Jack_McCallum 2
Rad1101 0.965
Ole Jack filled Rad so full of lead that his own mother didn't recognise him. Jack marches through with an adjusted perfect rating.
CaptainThorns 1.713
Bubba2341 1.933
The Captain and Bubba had a titanic showdown in which Bubba struck the final blow. However, ya just can't keep a good Captain down, and Thorns claims the final runner-up slot.
Gank 1.85
Stagger_Lee 1.666
I tried to put four in Gank's motherfucking head, but the bastard blind-sided me with his dog, which tore my throat out and left me to bleed out in the road. I shot the fucking dog, but that's not the point. Gank buries his hound and strides confidently into the next round, with maybe the slightest tear shed.
wardy DNP
Unabonger DNP
And just where the fuck did you two go?
badassmofo 1.857
Stuch 1.5
Badassmofo garrotted Stuch in a dark alley and sold his organs to the Chinese meat-merchants. Stay away from the sausage in Chinatown for a while.
Promethias 0.833
redskieslookfake 1.842
Promethias and his debut post weren't enough to stop redskies headbutting him to death in the finest English blues tradition, leaving him to get cold on the mean streets of Leicester. Red probably snatched his watch too.
Sphagnum 1.833
Brdn_Nkd 1.138
Sphagnum cruised into Brdn's bar and blew his brains out all over the bottles. Word is that the thunder from his steely fist made all the glasses jangle, but that's just a rumour.
Circe DNP
Snark DNP
Circe had a valid excuse to stay home, but Snark apparently was too scared to leave his house with the very thought of Circe prowling the streets in search of him.
Matchups for this round, drawn once more from the Fedora of Whisky:
BigMike
r0fl
badassmofo
Jack_McCallum
CaptainThorns
Orgasmatron
scourge
Sphagnum
redskieslookfake
Gank
Coyote
Bubba2341
Get down to those crossroads and trade your soul for your tales, because this round's gonna be even better. Good luck.
User Reviews
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-21 02:10:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like you
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-08 08:48:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now THAT is an excellent idea, badassmofo. Best contest idea I've yet seen around here.
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Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-08 06:55:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think it'd be cool if someone hosted a contest based on fables.
I think it would be pretty challenging and I think it would be great to see the fucked up lessons people try to teach.
That is all
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-08 06:27:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know.
It's all about the timing. Had I been able to do the story this weekend, I would have had it all done and this little time wasting "argument" would have never taken place.
Unfortunately, I didn't get it done before I was off roster at work and you should know damn well that I wasn't going to spend one of my days off writing it.
I apologised in there somewhere.
You guys need to lighten up.... ALOT!
Afterall, it's all about the hits for Stagger, nothing else.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-08 04:06:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well done Gank
/graceful in defeat
I'm going to go annoy someone now.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-08 01:36:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-05 16:13:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/u/redskieslookfake/l/igktw2
Rate the entries, Uber. You know you want to.
---
Considering that I forgot to review everything, this is sadly comical now.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-08 01:35:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh son of a...
I knew there was something I'd meant to do this weekend, and that something was 'rate everyone's entries.'
Fuck.
I'm happy that I didn't get to some users and not others - that'd have pissed me off more.
Still...all apologies everyone. Feel free to knee me in the nuts the next time you see me.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-08 00:32:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I know I said I might not be able to continue but, there's a computer room here, so I'll give it a shot if I have to.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-07 22:58:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ratings closed last night at 11:59 pm, sunday the 7th. I've just been slack about collecting them, because the Real World was calling.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-07 22:54:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus, Sphag, you couldn't write a story, but you write out volumes of shit arguing here?
You must learn to focus your energy, grasshopper.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-07 22:45:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-01 01:47:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well done to me for leaving out the fucking deadlines.
Submissions due Thursday the 4th May, 11:59 pm AEST. Ratings close Sunday 7th.
==============
But what TIME did/do ratings close?
Sigh.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-07 22:21:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jiminy Cricket, I'm gone all weekend and come back to find that I missed the biggest argument in IGKTW yet??
Someone should have called me. I'm looking at you scourge, since you're the only one with my phone number!
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:35:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:33:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Perhaps, or your perception is inaccurate.
I guess either possibility is equally as credible as the other.
___________________________________________
Ah, So, Grasshopper. My perception matches most of the people on this site.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:33:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Perhaps, or your perception is inaccurate.
I guess either possibility is equally as credible as the other.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:30:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:27:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not angry.
That disproves that little theory, doesn't it?
________________________________________________________
Then you are a basic, run-of-the-mill asshole.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:27:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not angry.
That disproves that little theory, doesn't it?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-07 12:20:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:57:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, I made a grammatical error, I've promptly slit my wrists to ensure it doesn't happen again.
What I'd really like to know is why any of you believe that my attitude towards you is 'unfair' or excessively 'nasty'.
I'd like to see one reason why you think that I should be alot nicer to you than I am.
Anyone?? One reason...
____________________________________________________________________________
Your review speaks volumes. You ask why we think you are unfair or
nasty, and you wish to know why you should be nicer. Whassa matta, dude,
feeling guilty?
Mike gave you the best reason of all. To expand on his thoughts:
Life is too fuccking short to put up with assholes. People like to be
treated with a modicum of respect and a bit of congeniality.
I'm something near 11 years older than Mike, so I know what he says is true.
Sphag, you fit the title of the Billy Joel song "Angry Young Man."
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:57:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, I made a grammatical error, I've promptly slit my wrists to ensure it doesn't happen again.
What I'd really like to know is why any of you believe that my attitude towards you is 'unfair' or excessively 'nasty'.
I'd like to see one reason why you think that I should be alot nicer to you than I am.
Anyone?? One reason...
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:54:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice try, Sphagchump. A typo is when you hit the key next to the one you
want, not one two keys and one row away. You suck as a liar. . .
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:50:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was a typo, by the way.
I'd been awake for in excess of 34 hours when I wrote that review.
Not that I really care about something as inane as that.
Good work, detective.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, so we all understand how wrong you are?
Good, my job is done here.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-07 11:03:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-07 08:06:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
This whole internet argument thingy you guys have going on sure is getting redundant, no?
---
Quite. But I can't not throw my two cents in before being done with it for good.
Looks like there's another user I get to ignore now.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-07 08:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's right, Sphaggy, Bubba is too easy. Nice way to wiggle
out, considering any response you gave me was lame.
Your line should have been 'more than Ghola' rather than 'more then',
Mr. Intellect. It was not a typo, you are simply uneducated.
When Shlongy is an asshole he does it with grace, finesse, and
style. You just sling shit and stink up the site.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-07 08:06:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:41:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
You circle jerkers are ALL dense, fucking idiots.
Not everyone decides to be nice and friendly in order to escape from their work. Others don't find that entertaining at all and choose a different method of conducting themselves.
Netiher way is right.
Neither way is wrong.
Except the nice way, it's fucking lame.
This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever read. I'm not saying that in a bad way Sphag since I don't know you and vice versa. I also have nothing against you, blah blah blah.
This is just a ridiculous statement. I'm guessing you are very young, and there's nothing wrong with that either.
When you get old like me, you realize that the nice way is never fucking lame. It's nice to be nice and it's nice to have people be nice to you.
There, that's my two cents on being nice.
Have a nice day. :)
This whole internet argument thingy you guys have going on sure is getting redundant, no?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-07 04:02:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sphagnum:
http://www2.ubersite.com/m/87439#1966348
Sluttily yours,
Sacrilicious
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 02:36:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There are some golden reviews in this post. Most of them were provided by me but you guys did your bit as well.
Good luck to all of those who got their pieces in on time and hopefully tonight I'll get around to reading them all. Apologies for the forfeit as well. I really didn't have time due to a roster change.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 02:34:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
On a serious note. I like the way you guys all subscribe to the 'holier than thou' theory of "we're not going to indulge you, you're beneath us etc etc".
Then, you ALL take the time to respond to the original comment that I made last night. Come on, you have to admit that it is somewhat strange that you all felt the need to respond, some of you more than once, when my 'Shtick' is clearly so:
Juvenile
Well-used
Boring
Insensitive
Old
One dimensional
Conceited
Assholish
etc.
Looks like Sphagnum wins again. Thanks for playing, losers.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-07 02:28:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Alright! Circle-jerkers unite.
Stagger, you owe me $500 for keeping this thing on most heated for another day.
Orgasmatron, give me irrefutable evidence that I used an alter to stir shit up. The fact that you think I would need to us an alter to stir things up when I am more than capable of doing it myself is quite astounding.
Just because I said to you that I was going to be nice doesn't mean that I actually gave a fuck whether I was going to be nice or not. It just so happened that I was busy all week and was barely on Uber. The fact that I decided to be tolerable when I was on should be a demonstration to you obvious retards that perhaps there is more than one dimension to me.
I don't have alters. Sacrilicious is a slut. Scourge rapes babies. Orgasmatron ingests more contaminated semen per annum then Ghola does and Bubba.... Forget it, Bubba's too easy.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-06 22:53:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sphagnum -
Wail at the wind all you want. Adopt the pose of the shitstirrer. Ring them bells and toll your same, tired song until you're blue in the face. It only serves to prove that your behavior is beneath you. I've told you many a time that you're better than this. Inside, you know it's true. Say what you want, but you know it's true. Your existence isn't validated by this negative feedback you so desperately want to receive. You aren't "proving the case for Sphagnum and what he's about" by getting people to tell you off. If that's all that you're looking for here then you're more shallow of a cunt than I'd originally thought. Yes, yes, I know that "everyone's allowed to use Uber for whatever he/she wants, and fuck you very much if you want to tell me otherwise." I'm not going to try and shit in your Apple Jacks just because I don't like the taste of them. All I'm saying is that you're wasting your time with this needless behavior. It's not entertaining, it's not cutting. It's alltogether something that I, and most people here (omg du yoo mean teh circle-jherk!??!?!?!11), find to be rather embarrassing. You're a grown man for Christ's sake. Try and act like it for a change.
Love,
Orgasmatron
PS - Don't think I didn't notice how you used an alter to stir shit up on your 'nice week.' I didn't think for a minute that you'd be capable of something as ridiculously simple as sticking to your word.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 22:32:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 18:20:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am verbose, and you'll deal with it. <------------
This is what I mean. Your grasp of sarcasm and gross hypocrisy has me dumbfounded.
The fact that you clearly didn't understand what I meant when I wrote that suggests that you will never understand what Sphagnum is all about.
I suggest you stop trying.
=============
Your sarcasm wasn't lost on me. Sigh.
And I don't need to bother trying to understand you, because you're one-dimensional as far as uber goes. It's really quite simple. And that was part of my point.
Also, try sticking to English. Capisce?
scourge- I am glad to see you here.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-06 21:58:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sphagnum.
I don't really have anything to say to you I guess.
Your shtick is tired now. You're boring.
You bore me.
That is all.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 19:24:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 14:09:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, because my reviews and writing don't suggest that I own an extensive vocabulary.
I am important.
_____________________________________________________
Owning an extensive vocabulary does not prevent you from
being a third-rate asshole.
Yes, you are a legend in your own mind.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 18:20:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 14:14:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:41:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Not everyone decides to be nice and friendly in order to escape from their work. Others don't find that entertaining at all and choose a different method of conducting themselves.
Netiher way is right.
Neither way is wrong.
======================
I am verbose, and you'll deal with it. <------------
This is what I mean. Your grasp of sarcasm and gross hypocrisy has me dumbfounded.
The fact that you clearly didn't understand what I meant when I wrote that suggests that you will never understand what Sphagnum is all about.
I suggest you stop trying.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 18:17:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Although your analysis was well put together, it was not only grossly inaccurate but it was boring and uneducational.
I'll reiterate in a language that hopefully even YOU will understand. I didn't have time to write another entry, like half the competition obviously didn't. Capiche?
Like I said before; Making an assessment of someone's character based on the way they portray themselves on the internet is not only completely ridiculous, it's also juvenile and unintelligent.
Now that we've got all the foreplay out of the way, how about letting me earfuck you until your brain explodes?
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-06 15:07:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I totally would have had to write that review in MSWord
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Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 14:14:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:41:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Not everyone decides to be nice and friendly in order to escape from their work. Others don't find that entertaining at all and choose a different method of conducting themselves.
Netiher way is right.
Neither way is wrong.
======================
I am verbose, and you'll deal with it.
Most interesting people are interesting because they possess more than one facet in regards their personalities. Their reactions are often in response to those who attempt to either meaningfully engage them, or to antagonize them in some way.
I am good natured the majority of the time, when I'm talking to people who interest me. That's how human beings interact with people who they feel enrich their social interactions in some way, even when it's via the internet. But as you're so quick to point out, I'm also capable of portraying the role of "slut" and "bitch." You know why? Because sometimes, I am those things, too. I can also be spiteful and reactionary. I'm capable of loving or hating you (well, maybe not YOU), indulging you or ignoring you, making you laugh or making you cry. All these possibilities are what make some people interested in me, and interested in the kinds of people I tend to surround myself with.
In contrast, possessing one predictable, antagonistic, cantankerous, hateful, tired persona is what often bores people to tears. Knowing what you'll say, and when you'll say it, isn't interesting to people. If you're here solely to entertain yourself with no regard for anyone else, as you're so fond of reiterating ad nauseum, then that's your prerogative. But some of us are also here for other reasons and we refuse to assimilate to yours any more than you do to ours.
Let's face it. There's a good likelihood that you're just as bitter and boring in real life as you are on uber, because it's almost ALL YOU PORTRAY HERE. It's possible you didn't post your entry because you are uninspired and uncreative and incapable of engaging us with another story. Or maybe that's just a suspicion.
So I agree. Neither way is right, and neither way is wrong. The trick is to interact in more than one way. Either way, carry on.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 14:09:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, because my reviews and writing don't suggest that I own an extensive vocabulary.
I am important.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:50:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You must be an important guy, Sphaggy. You have your own secretary.
I know you had to have someone suggest to you the usage of 'pretentious'.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:49:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:48:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:45:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Didn't your mother teach you that, cocksore?
_____________________________________________________
I didn't have a mother. Just like you, a crow shit on
a fencepost and I was hatched by the Sun. . .
-----
haha... True story.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:48:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Anyway, your pretentious rhetoric is really starting to bore me, fossil.
Where the fuck is Scourge, I want to hear some more fanciful stories about how he would have beaten me if his toaster didn't malfunction and erase his epic masterpiece.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:48:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:45:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Didn't your mother teach you that, cocksore?
_____________________________________________________
I didn't have a mother. Just like you, a crow shit on
a fencepost and I was hatched by the Sun. . .
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:45:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Didn't your mother teach you that, cocksore?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:41:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, you showed us. Every time you call names your IQ.....never mind.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:41:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You circle jerkers are ALL dense, fucking idiots.
Not everyone decides to be nice and friendly in order to escape from their work. Others don't find that entertaining at all and choose a different method of conducting themselves.
Netiher way is right.
Neither way is wrong.
Except the nice way, it's fucking lame.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha
You sure showed me...
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:37:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:35:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
How old are you again? You form your opinion on someone's character based on the way they act on an internet message board?
That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard.
___________________________________________________________
I couldn't possibly form an opinion of your
character. You have none.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:35:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How old are you again? You form your opinion on someone's character based on the way they act on an internet message board?
That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:34:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck off Bubba, you fat cunt.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 13:20:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 10:33:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 10:24:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 09:25:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
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On a more believable note, I ran out of time to write mine
Unfortunately, you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time... AGAIN.
==========
"Running out of time to write mine" means the EXACT same thing as "you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time", Einstein. Does it not?
Go fuck yourself, Sphagnum. To quote another competitor's thoughts on your future, "I hope you die in a car crash tonight."
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Did you notice the emphasis on the word "AGAIN", skank?
I won't be in any cars tonight because I'm stuck in this stupid fucking controlroom until 6am.
Sorry to disappoint you, slut.
(On a more serious and infinitely less verbose note; I'm confused as to why you're defending that waste of Oxygen.)
_____________________________________________________________________________
Maybe she realizes he is a decent person and that you
are a blathering idiot who would call Mother Theresa a liar.
Forget the car crash, control boy. Just use the shotgun.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 10:33:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 10:24:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 09:25:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
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On a more believable note, I ran out of time to write mine
Unfortunately, you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time... AGAIN.
==========
"Running out of time to write mine" means the EXACT same thing as "you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time", Einstein. Does it not?
Go fuck yourself, Sphagnum. To quote another competitor's thoughts on your future, "I hope you die in a car crash tonight."
-----
Did you notice the emphasis on the word "AGAIN", skank?
I won't be in any cars tonight because I'm stuck in this stupid fucking controlroom until 6am.
Sorry to disappoint you, slut.
(On a more serious and infinitely less verbose note; I'm confused as to why you're defending that waste of Oxygen.)
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 10:24:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 09:25:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
----
On a more believable note, I ran out of time to write mine
Unfortunately, you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time... AGAIN.
==========
"Running out of time to write mine" means the EXACT same thing as "you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time", Einstein. Does it not?
Go fuck yourself, Sphagnum. To quote another competitor's thoughts on your future, "I hope you die in a car crash tonight."
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-06 09:25:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-05 20:59:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
Server at work blew up Wednesday morning. It finally got repaired about twenty minutes ago.
My post for this round was gone, along with some other fiction pieces I had.
Half of my photos are gone.
Half of this years work is gone.
No way to restore any of it.
My vacation is likely not going to happen now that I'm suddenly three months behind at work. I'm not incredibly happy. No. Not at all.
god damn it
----
HAHAHAHAHAHA
On a more believable note, I ran out of time to write mine and decided that I'd like to see what happy horseshit you came up with to describe how winning by forfeit was just a formality anyway.
Unfortunately, you couldn't even get your fucking shithouse story in on time... AGAIN.
Why don't you pull the heartstrings of the circle-jerk fraternity with your tales of server meltdown woe and see if they'll take pity on you and your pathetic little predicament and send you through to the third round as the highest rated loser?
God knows, if there was a vote, you'd definitely be the highest rated "loser" on this planet.
I hope you get electrocuted by your computer next time, you fucking retard.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-05-06 04:36:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
shu shu birdie poo flu
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-06 03:20:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bird Flu will only touch those with the
brain of a bird. I think you...wait...
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-06 02:38:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Go rate the entries, ESPECIALLY MY EXHIBITION PIECE IT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT.
It seems I've gone out of style.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-06 01:18:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm out of town next week and won't have access to a computer. If the deadline for writing is before next sunday, then I am out. I will continue Abigail's Will however regardless.
In any event, thanks for this contest, it has given me a new story to write.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-06 00:38:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-05 20:59:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
Server at work blew up Wednesday morning. It finally got repaired about twenty minutes ago.
My post for this round was gone, along with some other fiction pieces I had.
Half of my photos are gone.
Half of this years work is gone.
No way to restore any of it.
My vacation is likely not going to happen now that I'm suddenly three months behind at work. I'm not incredibly happy. No. Not at all.
god damn it
--
You kept PERSONAL stuff on the company server? Serves you right.
I keep all my shit on my fucking C drive, or burn it to disk, or email it to my personal account.
For Christ sake man.
May I suggest you rent or buy some Trailer Park Boys?
I think I'm coming down with Bird Flu, and Ricky's knock-knock jokes are cheering me right the fuck up.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-05 23:36:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You want a mustache ride, scourge?
They make everything better. For reals.
I won't even charge. It's on the house.
Hop on. Ride your worries away.
That's a tough break, man. You want that I should bust some heads?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-05 21:46:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sweet jebus, scourge, that's harsh.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-05 20:59:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Server at work blew up Wednesday morning. It finally got repaired about twenty minutes ago.
My post for this round was gone, along with some other fiction pieces I had.
Half of my photos are gone.
Half of this years work is gone.
No way to restore any of it.
My vacation is likely not going to happen now that I'm suddenly three months behind at work. I'm not incredibly happy. No. Not at all.
god damn it
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-05 16:22:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
(says the asshole who hasn't rated anyone yet)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-05 16:13:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/u/redskieslookfake/l/igktw2
Rate the entries, Uber. You know you want to.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-05 08:31:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-04 17:52:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87537
I'm going home. Fuck this work day.
------------------------------------
O-Man - good job. A few minor grammatical errors, but nothing to prevent me from leaving a +2 once this round is over.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-05 00:15:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87549
My exhibition piece.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-04 17:52:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87537
I'm going home. Fuck this work day.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 17:13:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've spent the last few hours at my desk staring at nothing, trying to concentrate on reading and reviewing some entries.
The last two IGKTW entries from me have really blown some fuses, cause I've had to go all out on them.
Of course, I enjoyed the hell out of doing it too, but I just have that 'I'm all fucked out, baby' feeling upstairs, savvy?
Great contest.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-05-04 16:57:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .._,,,,--~~~,~"¯¯¯¯"~~~,-~~----,,,__
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... ... ... ...,/,:::::::::::::\:::::::::::::|::::::::::::::::::|::::::::::::::::,,-"::::::::::::::::::::::"-,
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... ... .\,. . . . . . . . . . . . .\. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . /... ... ... .|::::::::""~~~--,--,~-,,::|
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|::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|"¯¯"~-,... ... ... ... |::::::::::::/
."~~~~~~~~-----------,-------,-------------~~~~~~~~";;;;;;;;;;/... ... ... ... |::::::::::/
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... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... '\... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... _,,-~"
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..\, ... ... ... ... ...___,,--~~"
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... "~--------~~~"''
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-05-04 16:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 14:51:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-05-04 14:41:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 12:31:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, this round was fucking disappointing. What the hell happened to everyone?
----------
I foresee a final round of three, where 2 of the participants forfeit.
---
My only chance of victory. Don't take it away
Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-05-04 14:41:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 12:31:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, this round was fucking disappointing. What the hell happened to everyone?
----------
I foresee a final round of three, where 2 of the participants forfeit.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:50:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't get Uber up on my screen sometimes. Takes a long time to load and---
What the fuck is with all the sniggering?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:49:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:29:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
More specifically, you are referring to what....?
--
I'm having difficulty getting it up.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:48:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
U.S. bird flu study predicts millions of deaths, billions in losses
Planners expect many would have to be treated at home -- other studies more dire
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/05/04/MNG76IKCPF1.DTL
Hey, I was talking about this a year ago and no one listened. Wait until the vampires and zombies start showing up. Then we'll see the true cost of ignoring my warnings.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:41:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just got into the office for the first time today...fucking construction sites...I'll tell ya.
Anyway, after traveling all weekend and trying to play catchup all week I have had absolutely no time to write so I guess (barring any miraculous extension) I'll be conceeding this round to that undeserving whelp McCallum.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:29:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
More specifically, you are referring to what....?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:27:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What in the cold-filtered fuck is going on with Uber these days?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:27:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know, Jackie. Seeing as badass hasn't submitted a thing yet, it might just.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:26:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 12:31:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, this round was fucking disappointing. What the hell happened to everyone?
--
Hey dude, does mine count? Huh? Does it? Huh? Does it count, huh? Huh dude? Does it count? Does it? Does it count, huh? Does it? Does it count? Huh dude? Does it count, huh? Does it? Does it count? Does it? Does it count? Does it? Huh dude? Does it count, huh? Does it? Does it? Huh dude? Does it? Huh dude? Does it count? Does it? Huh dude? Does it count? Does it? Does it count? Does it? Huh dude? Does it count?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:21:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Chill, Sphagnum. You're not 'everyone', at least - not yet.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-04 13:15:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not enough time, super genius.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 12:31:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, this round was fucking disappointing. What the hell happened to everyone?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-05-04 12:24:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't have enough time to write what I was going to.
Oh well, it sucks ass to win by forfeit anyway.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 11:58:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought it was 10AM my time, and I think it was 10AM Uber time.
I guess my dick is longer than I thought. I just fucked myself.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-04 11:53:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope I made the deadline. There's still an hour left, right?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87514
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 11:08:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:49:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
Seeing as Thorns made the deadline (I think) it's up to him whether you stay in or not, O-Tron.
-------------------
Yeah, I did make the deadline. As long as O-Man posts something by end of today (1159PM EDT) I'm okay with it...I know how stuff can come up at work.
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-05-04 11:02:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It was nice playin' guys.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:49:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seeing as Thorns made the deadline (I think) it's up to him whether you stay in or not, O-Tron.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:42:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice piece Gank. I shall rate it after the deadline closes.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:35:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:46:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:35:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The deadline is today isn't it? In 25 mins?
--------------------------------------------
Ummm, yup. Hence my somewhat hurried ending on my story. I had to leave it unfinished yesterday when I left work.
Hope the others post something soon, or this is gonna be a short-lived Round 2, unless we grant more extensions.
---
If that's the case, that'd be great. If not, then have Stag stick to the rules and DQ me.
Shit's blowing up here at work, and it's been crazy all morning. And...I kid you not...part of it's because of "the shocker" and a fairly big piece of advertising. I wish I was making that up.
I'll check back when this has blown over and see what's what.
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Round 2 - Inevitable: http://www.ubersite.com/m/87508
Sorry for the tardiness, I'm a bit hungover. I can only write these depressing shits lately when I'm drunk.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-04 07:33:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
I forgot: If I can recreate my post in the next few days I may
put it up for Exhibition.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
You should, so I can rail at myself for having advanced on a technicality when I see how much better your post is than mine. Or something.
Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:10:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's coming guys, I just woke up.
Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:02:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was going to try and be the LAST person to post this round.
But I had to make the deadline, so...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87507
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 10:01:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Annnnnd Gank submits in at the last minute: http://www.ubersite.com/m/87507
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking hell everyone. This is helluva disappointing! Star Wars day is becoming a farce!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:50:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:46:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:35:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The deadline is today isn't it? In 25 mins?
--------------------------------------------
Ummm, yup. Hence my somewhat hurried ending on my story. I had to leave it unfinished yesterday when I left work.
Hope the others post something soon, or this is gonna be a short-lived Round 2, unless we grant more extensions.
---
I had to spend half an hour of my boss's time writing it just now!
I did find the time to abuse Stagger via email and make fun of Phuzzy's freckly back however
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:49:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*bump*
BigMike
r0fl
badassmofo
Jack_McCallum
CaptainThorns - http://www.ubersite.com/m/87506
Orgasmatron
scourge
Sphagnum
redskieslookfake - http://www.ubersite.com/m/87505
Gank
Coyote - http://www.ubersite.com/m/87497
Bubba2341 - self-DQ (http://www.ubersite.com/m/87463)
Clock's ticking, fellas...
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:46:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:35:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The deadline is today isn't it? In 25 mins?
--------------------------------------------
Ummm, yup. Hence my somewhat hurried ending on my story. I had to leave it unfinished yesterday when I left work.
Hope the others post something soon, or this is gonna be a short-lived Round 2, unless we grant more extensions.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:35:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The deadline is today isn't it? In 25 mins?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:23:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Round 2: Remittance - http://www.ubersite.com/m/87506
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-04 09:14:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87505
Part 2.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-04 07:33:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I forgot: If I can recreate my post in the next few days I may
put it up for Exhibition.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-04 07:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Now that Uber is back up I can respond.
I seem to become an emotional idiot when I screw up, and
I sometimes follow with another screw up. When I realized
I posted the wrong shit I did two things: I posted the
No Content post and I wiped the word file. Stupid? Yeah.
When I saw the response here I felt like a total idiot.
I see Coyote has posted. I haven't read his entry yet,
but even if I could re-create my entry I would look like the
biggest asswipe on the site.
I wanted to WIN this comp! The blues are my thing. This
is gonna keep me pissed at myself for weeks.
My concession stands. Good luck, Coyote.
*weeps*
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-05-04 02:15:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87497
Let the beatings begin!
Submitted by Doodies (user info) at 2006-05-04 02:00:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Goddamn, you d'ubers are funny!
You have your own little personalities and everything.
I love ya!
http://suckityoubitch.com/pages/1/index.htm
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-04 01:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn, you're pretentious, Jackie me-lad. But in the nicest possible way.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-03 15:51:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think we should DQ McCallum
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-03 11:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My sugar-blasted mega-mocha is going down. Down, motherfuckers!
The magic C is kicking in.
Time to work on a story, damn it!
Time to cast out my story net and see if I can channel a voice.
Ahhh... there we go. Caught a black man. An OLD black man.
Tell me a story, old-timer.
*
"Ah'll tell you a story, white boah. Ah'll tell it true if you po' me a real cup o' joe, not that treacle you suckin' down. Now you set yo'self down an' doan interrupt none, an' gimme yo' ear. Now this heah is a tale 'bout a swamp, an' some white men with black hearts, an' a preacher what delivered unto them the vengeance of the Lord, praise Jesus, son, praise Jesus."
*
And away we go...
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 11:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And your fevered, sweating mind.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 11:02:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's impossible to ignore you.
You're a product of my keyboard.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 11:00:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:46:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and if there's any way you can send me those gigs, please do, much gratitude, etc.
-----
I will not be ignored.
Bitch.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:55:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shaving saved my marriage!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:50:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:46:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:38:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
p.s. Berty has small hands. Pass it on
===
This is a good thing, it makes you look bigger.
---
It helps when you're shaved, too.
Or so I hear, I mean.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:49:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*grumbles*
Fucking fascist.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:46:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:38:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
p.s. Berty has small hands. Pass it on
===
This is a good thing, it makes you look bigger.
Right?
What?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:46:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and if there's any way you can send me those gigs, please do, much gratitude, etc.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:46:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:36:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG liek I kant beleeve yoo R making conseshuns for peeple in UR circle-jerk1!!!
Mussolini.
Hitler.
Cunt.
Nazi.
Fag.
Dipshit.
You forgot Fascist.
If you are going to have Hitler and Nazi up there, you have to have Mussolini and Fascist. Get it right for god's sake. :)
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:44:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I got Live Seeds the other day. I forgot it existed, or I would've bought it far sooner. Turns out it's awesome.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got a concert of his from the Royal Albert Hall in 98, a live show from 96, a song called Cindy he did with Johnny Cash...um, I'll have to go back and check now, because I've been grabbing things left and right.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:40:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How'd you go with your downloading, O-man? Anything good for me?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:39:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:36:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG liek I kant beleeve yoo R making conseshuns for peeple in UR circle-jerk1!!!
Mussolini.
Hitler.
Cunt.
Nazi.
Fag.
Dipshit.
-----------
Shiftone, motherfucker. Shiftone.
Righteous.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:36:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG liek I kant beleeve yoo R making conseshuns for peeple in UR circle-jerk1!!!
Mussolini.
Hitler.
Cunt.
Nazi.
Fag.
Dipshit.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:32:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:29:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm drinking a hot chocolate and eating yoghurt, and they go well together, who fucking knew that? Weird.
---
*nods in acknowledgment*
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:29:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm drinking a hot chocolate and eating yoghurt, and they go well together, who fucking knew that? Weird.
Good man, Coyote. As long as people aren't deliberately screwing with things, I'll let most stuff slide. Bubba is back in with a chance to submit his correct entry.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm inclined to agree with Coyote and Stag...Bubba's entry isn't up to par with his usual snuff and he's not in the "throw-a-fit-over-rules-shlongy-nitty clique." So I don't care if he resubmits due to honest error...majority rule, I suppose.
As Coyote said, it's about the writing, not the rules.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:19:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:29:24 (#)
Coyote, if I could have your attention here for just one moment?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87468#1961920
I'm inclined to believe him because a) the formatting on his story was all screwy and b) he doesn't strike me as the type to go all bullshit on us.
If you want to let him resubmit his correct entry, it's fine by me.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
That's cool, let resubmission be the order of the day. This contest should be about the writing and not about the technicalities.
Whether I can actually come up with anything before the deadline is another question entirely.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
red, if you're gonna be here, you might as well go read my part 2.
Stagger, the Preachers real name is Ezekiel, but you're gonna find that out in the next part anyway whether I go on in this comp or not.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm glad he doesn't NOW.
I'm also glad that he lives thousands of miles away.
I originally had a longer list, but I decided just Robbie Savage was sufficient rebuttal.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:09:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:05:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage.
Robbie Savage.
---
Damn, I'm glad that Welsh bastard never played for my club! Aren't you glad too?
oh dear oh dear.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 10:05:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage, Robbie Savage.
Robbie Savage.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:58:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:39:41 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're just jealous of our awesome beaches and generally sunny climate. Also that we don't have whole cities full of Scousers, AND no Bradford, anywhere.
---
Snakes. Spiders. Sharks. Extra Snakes. Blue Ringed Octopi. More Spiders. Sea Snakes. Duck Billed Platypi. Kangaroos. Snakes. Harold Bishop. Stonefish. Spiders. Even More Snakes. Cunning Spiders. Giant Bees. Jellyfish. More Stonefish. Snakes. Spiders. Izzy with the Giant Nostrils from Neighbours singing rubbish covers. Giant Octopi. Snakes. Cancer. Flies. Hats with corks on.
And let's not forget Brisbane.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:39:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're just jealous of our awesome beaches and generally sunny climate. Also that we don't have whole cities full of Scousers, AND no Bradford, anywhere.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:38:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1000 words on Preachers or Vengeance.
I have a title, and a couple of paragraphs in my head already - but otherwise nothing.
I better get some work done tonight. Bah.
Australian time sucks ass.
p.s. Berty has small hands. Pass it on.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:31:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bubba, if I were you, I'd wait a day and then go ahead and post your proper entry, which will count pending Coyote's approval.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:29:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Coyote, if I could have your attention here for just one moment?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87468#1961920
I'm inclined to believe him because a) the formatting on his story was all screwy and b) he doesn't strike me as the type to go all bullshit on us.
If you want to let him resubmit his correct entry, it's fine by me.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-03 09:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Coyote, I concede. I screwed myself. See my 'No Content' post review
for an explanation. Good luck.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-03 07:55:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heah 'tis. . .
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87463
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-03 07:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Deadline is Thursday, 9:59AM, Eastern Daylight Time.
Sheesh, it's just like work. I do everything while the
boss sits on his ass.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-03 02:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Round 2: Preachers and Vengeance
BigMike http://www.ubersite.com/m/87456
r0fl
badassmofo
Jack_McCallum
CaptainThorns
Orgasmatron
scourge
Sphagnum
redskieslookfake
Gank
Coyote
Bubba2341
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:29:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
First off the blocks!
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:28:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87456
Mine is up. This was a good idea. It's got me thinking about writing again.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Just think crazy preachers inciting mobs to chase people through cornfields, that sort of thing. Blues, especially modern blues, is rife with similarities to noir. It doesn't matter if a blues tale is slightly noir-ish.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:23:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:07:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
I refuse to attempt to calculate time difference.
=============
Nazi.
Sheesh.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Such a kind competition host you are with the time zone conversion, alter mine.
I hope that next round's themes, when paired, make a little more sense when married together when considered in reference to the blues. For as fun as it is to play with 'preachers' and 'vengeance' I find it to be more an exercise in noir, or grit, than the blues. As such, I find myself feeling like I'm sacrificing the feel and nature of the competition in favor of staying true to the trappings of the second round.
But maybe I've just been listening to the wrong kind of blues...
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 23:07:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I refuse to attempt to calculate time difference.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 22:56:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dunno, but it's 12:56 as I reply.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 22:42:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Stag: As of this review it should be about 12:42PM Wednesday in Oz, right?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 22:41:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, I'm having Unabonger write my excuse when I lose the contest.. :(
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 22:19:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Unabonger's excuse was awesome.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 21:52:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-02 21:47:38 (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope Badass takes this round.
Strangling niggers with a guitar string and drinking their blood in the moonlight just to tap into this whole Negro Blues thing wears on a man something fierce.
__________________________________________________________________
Whachoo sayin' white boy? Jes write yer shit an' stop yer whinin'
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-02 21:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope Badass takes this round.
Strangling niggers with a guitar string and drinking their blood in the moonlight just to tap into this whole Negro Blues thing wears on a man something fierce.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 21:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I CAN'T STAND THE FUCKING SUSPENSE!!
I'm gonna write some shit and post it. . . . . . .
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-02 20:52:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 20:26:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
"There are 300,000 of you fuckers out there." OK, twelve.
SOMEBODY post somethin' dammit!!
--
I'll get to work on mine first thing in the morning.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 20:26:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"There are 300,000 of you fuckers out there." OK, twelve.
SOMEBODY post somethin' dammit!!
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-05-02 20:09:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wardy DNP
Unabonger DNP
And just where the fuck did you two go?
_______________________________________
I was busy.
Like my girlfriend left me and took my two sons from my previous marriage cause she said I wasn't fit to be a father due to the drinking and gambling. Then I lost all my money at the track, my landlord tried to evict me, I accidentally ran over my dog with my pickup truck, I went blind from drinking moonshine, and I got the clap from a hooker with foam on her baj. How was I supposed to know, I was blind, right?
So I didn't really have time to sit down and think of a good quality blues post, you know?
Catch ya next time.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 19:50:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still trying to figure out why Stag won't put times in EDT.
I mean, IT'S RIGHT THERE ON THE FUCKING SCREEN!!!!
Whew. I'm OK now. . .
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-05-02 19:04:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aww fuck.
Guess what I forgot all about?
Gawd damn it.
Piss on it. I'll worry about it tomorrow.
Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-05-02 12:39:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Likewise
|
|
v
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-02 11:15:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good luck Gank.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-02 10:52:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just got home around 9 last night from Kentucky.
Fucking McCallum...are you serious?
Watch out Jack, I'm coming for you.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-02 08:05:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Boy, I can't leave you people alone for a single night and you start babbling about dead singers, ghey actors, and roadrunners with giant yellow peenars.
What? It's true. Go ask Habeeb.
Bubba, I'm curious as to who's gonna post first too...and I haven't even started yet.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 03:07:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool, schweethaaaat, I'm done for tonight. Sweet dreams. . . .
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-05-02 03:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well he wasnt really gay, he just pretended to be gay because the landlord didn't want any dudes living with these chicks he was trying to score with.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-05-02 03:03:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so's the gay guy from threes company.
*tear*
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 02:59:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry to tell you this, Stag, but Johnny is dead too. . .. :-(
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 02:59:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
....right? RIGHT?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-02 02:55:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 02:49:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Stag, listen up: Elvis has been feeling sick, and the Beatles may break up. . . . .
---------------------------------------------------------------
At least Cash is still going, then.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-02 02:53:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Rad, I'm relly sorry. When your wang falls off, sing 'Imagine'.
Submitted by rad1101 (