bob dylan (594 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Best
Rating: -0.84 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by LSD 420 <lsd4444.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-05-06 15:40:44 EDT
So the other day I was hanging out at the local food-mart putting bite marks in all the hot dog packages when this pregnant mother comes up to me and she's like "excuse me sir, i need to get some hot dogs."
So I was like "I'VE GOT YER HOT DOGS RIGHT HERE!" And I made her smoke twenty thousand cigars.
So then I performed a C-section on her and pulled out her meth baby who was so deformed that he had turned into an anvil, which I dropped on her foot.
Then she was like "NOOO MY RUNNING CAREER IS RUINED!" and she turned into a giant vagina filled with centipedes.
So then I went to blockbuster to rent some porno but the guy was like "I'm sorry sir, we don't have any pornography, but you can now rent your balls for the low price of YO MAMA!"
So I rented my balls and left. Terrible service.
So then I went to work. I work in a coffee shop and we all the time have these university students coming in to debate post modernist pre modernist post cubist pre archaicist art, but I enforce a strict policy of no intellect, so I usually throw fecal matter at their papers.
Then I usually get put on a five week probation cuz I'm actually just the janitor.
Well, the janitor's son, but I like to pretend.
So I walk in and there's like these three spanish guys and a japanese dude there and they're like "hey hombre, burrito salsa tortilla dorito!" and I was like "ci, señor!" then the japanese dude was like "toyota toshiba!"
Of COURSE I was absolutely enraged! HOW DARE HE CHALLENGE MY HONOR!?
So I put him in a jar and spread him on my toast for the next few years.
Course since this was just the other day, I had to travel time to do that, which meant i had to get my passport updated.
I went to the passport office, but I just ended up buying some looseleaf paper that I later wrote "passport" on in my own blood. Cept I forgot that my blood is made of Fromaldistate Shambligrade, which explodes when it touches purtanium.
So then there was this huge explosion which knocked earth off its axis and catapulted it into the sun which then exploded too and destroyed the whole universe which collapsed upon istelf leaving nothing left but a fat dude floating through the nothingness beating his meat for the rest of eternity.
Then god was like "oops, the paper wasn't made of purtanium" so he reversed it and gave me a free meatball sub.
YUM!
It looked like this:
User Reviews
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-08 16:56:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He'd love it
Submitted by marginwalker (user info) at 2006-05-08 14:27:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dylan would be mortified.
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2006-05-08 07:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
terrible
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-05-07 23:06:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gayish.
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2006-05-07 22:56:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:00:53 (#)
Ranking: 0
Regardless of who wrote it, take it as it is, you fags. God damn I must be dealing with a bunch of immature six year olds.
_______________________________________
Yeah, and YOUR reply is so much more mature, right?
Submitted by sealclubber (user info) at 2006-05-07 04:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Midgets should be kept as pets.
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-05-06 21:51:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Store-brand BOSHman...
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2006-05-06 20:53:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I sense potential in you young one...
One day you may be great.
For now however.
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2006-05-06 19:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jojojojoan (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:48:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 15:54:20 (#)
Ranking: -1
Not BOSH.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-05-06 17:55:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87593
Because I like me better.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-05-06 17:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:00:53 (#)
Ranking: 0
Regardless of who wrote it, take it as it is, you fags. God damn I must be dealing with a bunch of immature six year olds.
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I didn't read your post, but obviously you're a whiny bitch. Here's a -2 for that.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:58:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
heh
Submitted by jojojojoan (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:48:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 15:54:20 (#)
Ranking: -1
Not BOSH.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Allow me to clarify:
I was using "BOSH" as an adjective, not a reference to a user. Although, if you're going to copy someone's style, you should at least do it well.
Regardless of who wrote it, I didn't find it funny. Hence, my rating.
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-06 16:00:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Regardless of who wrote it, take it as it is, you fags. God damn I must be dealing with a bunch of immature six year olds.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-06 15:54:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Not BOSH.