My Secret Smileys (847 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.04 on 31 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by :D (View user info) at 2006-05-09 06:15:12 EDT
I can hear the photocopier. Whirring away.
It has 100 sheets to print out.
The photocopier is also a printer.
People are talking about the party last night.
It sounds like they had fun. I was not invited.
I do not mind. Everybody seems to like me. I have been told that I am very likeable.
But I do not get invited to parties.
Whiiiirrrrrr. Slap.
Whiiiirrrrrr. Slap.
Whiiiirrrrrr. Slap.
I can hear the slapping noise of the fresh sheets landing on the pile.
Whiiiirrrrrr. Slap.
I am printing out 100 smiley faces.
100 little cute smileys. Except they are not so little. Text size 100. Landscape.
I should not waste ink and paper. So I am printing out 100 big white smiling faces. On white paper.
I think the photocopier has finished printing now.
It carries on Whirring for about 30 seconds after it finishes.
Even if you only print out 1 invisible smiley.
Or 1 of anything.
I will put all the smileys back in the printer later.
And the next 100 sheets that people print will have secret smileys on them.
I like to think it has an affect. Spreading secret happiness through the office.
Nobody will ask me what I am doing. Mr Simms likes me.
The photocopier has definitely finished.
It is still whirring but there is no slapping anymore.
I will go and get the sheets.
I will put them back later.
For now I have put them across my thighs.
100 friendly little smileys in my lap. Photocopier warm.
Mmmmmmmmmm.
User Reviews
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-05-16 14:02:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, I'd already reviewed this. Huh.
Oh well.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-05-16 13:56:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
enjoyable.
Submitted by DasHeer (user info) at 2007-05-16 13:55:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha I liked it
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2007-05-16 13:36:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JapanFour (user info) at 2006-06-12 21:43:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome.
Submitted by pragmatic (user info) at 2006-06-12 21:30:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like
Submitted by Sockster (user info) at 2006-06-12 21:03:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude, you're a nut.
Keep it up.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-06-01 17:12:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
retardedly humourous
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2006-05-18 13:07:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
jeebus this was so sweet and cute I actually caught myself leaning into my left hand while reading with a big stupid smile on my face.
can I keep you?
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2006-05-18 10:21:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:17:57 (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:16:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Photocopiers smell of death.
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It's how the world lost Grizzly Adams
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I don't know why, but I think that's the funniest fucking thing I've read all week.
Submitted by Lucylou (user info) at 2006-05-09 20:41:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:51:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by angel_2k01 (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:05:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
i think this is cute. screw you -2 guys.
Submitted by COMountain (user info) at 2006-05-09 17:54:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by MonkeyingAround (user info) at 2006-05-09 10:44:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
e
You scare me, and yet remind me of my little one at the same time.
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OH FUCK! YOU REPRODUCED?
Someone actually left their wang near you gash long enough to conceive?
Submitted by BrownEyedGirrl (user info) at 2006-05-09 15:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
whatever makes you smile.... er... smiley....
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2006-05-09 14:52:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Welcome to alter. I mean uber. Welcome to uber.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2006-05-09 14:46:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You remind me of me.
Submitted by MonkeyingAround (user info) at 2006-05-09 10:44:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You scare me, and yet remind me of my little one at the same time. I am not sure what to think. I like what you are doing with the whole secret smiley yet the way this is written .... it's like your either on some heavy psychosis drugs or need to be. Eitherway have a plus 2
Submitted by georgemichael (user info) at 2006-05-09 09:11:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-05-09 09:10:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think SHLONGY needs a secret invisible smiley! Here's one just for YOU big guy:
^
|
|
It's right there, but it's INVISIBLE so you can't see it!
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-05-09 09:10:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
...meh.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-09 08:51:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This ain't a secret; This post blows and so do "smileys".
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-09 08:45:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not too shabby for a first post...here's a "Worth Reading" rating in high hopes that you're not just another alter among the 10K recently created in past months.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2006-05-09 08:35:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It is rare these days to see examples of benign psychosis. I think the world needs more of it.
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:51:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by angel_2k01 (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:05:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
i think this is cute. screw you -2 guys.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:17:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
nice
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:17:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by angel_2k01 (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:05:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
i think this is cute. screw you -2 guys.
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Got to say, no one actually has given this a -2
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:16:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
what a FAG!
Submitted by angel_2k01 (user info) at 2006-05-09 07:05:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i think this is cute. screw you -2 guys.
Submitted by MrSmiley (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:24:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
:(
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:17:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:16:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Photocopiers smell of death.
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It's how the world lost Grizzly Adams
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:17:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Photocopiers pump out ozone. Which sterilises you.
Also putting paper through twice can jam a laser printer. If it wraps around the imaging unit I hope you get burnt retrieving it.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-05-09 06:16:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Photocopiers smell of death.