Oh, how I love a wrong number... (985 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.17 on 38 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by swine_powered_sock_monkey (View user info) at 2006-05-16 12:14:45 EDT
So last night I'm driving home from the mecca of everyday low prices when the familiar chime of an incoming text message distracts me from my bargain-induced stupor. "New message from *Random Number*" Is what I see when I pick up the phone. My first thought was that one of my friends got a new phone, but what would have been just another wrong number turned into the best laugh I've had in several weeks. The following is an unedited transcript of the text conversation between me and my new friend Alexis.
From: XXX-XXX-XXXX
Hey loren wassup this is alexis
8:44pm 5/15/06
From: swine_powered_hate_machine
Hey Alexis, this isn't Loren's number. What are you wearing?
8:47pm 5/15/06
From: XXX-XXX-XXXX
Who is this?
8:47pm 5/15/06
From: swine_powered_hate_machine
Just some random guy that got a text from a random number.
So what are you wearing?
8:49pm 5/15/06
From: XXX-XXX-XXXX
None of ur binness dont ever text me again
8:51pm 5/15/06
From: swine_powered_hate_machine
Hey! You started it!
I thought we had something special there :(
8:54pm 5/15/06
From: XXX-XXX-XXXX
No i thought this was lauren and im not like that i have someone ok buh bye
8:59pm 5/15/06
From: swine_powered_hate_machine
So what ARE you wearing?
9:01pm 5/15/06
By this point in time I'm safely back home and unloading my treasure trove of homogenized consumer goodness, slightly dissapointed that I haven't heard back from my new friend. Then my phone rings. Another number I don't recognize. I answer it.
"Yeah?"
"Hello?"
"Yo."
"Who is this?"
"You called me... who the fuck is this?"
"Uhhhhhh, this is Cody." Cody sounds like a 12 year old that's seen his first dead body. "Have you been texting someone tonight?" JOY! The game continues.
"Could you be a bit more specific? I text a lot of people. Like at the moment I'm waiting to hear back from a guy about getting myself shot out of a cannon."
"(Nervous laugh) Ummm, her name is Alexis and she called me cause somebody at this number was texting her."
"Well, technically Cody, she messaged me first. Sometimes I enjoy having a bit of fun with a wrong number. She wasn't the best I've had, but she was pretty damned good."
"Well she thought you were a pervert or something."
"Not at all, Cody my boy. No more than any other guy my age. Just having a bit of fun at another's expense. By the way, you don't happen to know where I could score about 30 pounds of smoked salmon do you?"
"Ummm... no."
"Just my luck. Well if that's all then I'll be going now. I need to make dinner and beat the old lady before I go to bed."
"Ok..."
"Just one more question Cody."
"What's that?"
"What are you wearing?"
*click*
Well I'll be damned. I guess she did have someone after all.
User Reviews
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-06-30 11:03:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am pretty sure this is the best first post I ahve ever read...
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-06-02 13:25:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-02 12:12:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 For the best comment I have read on Uber all day
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-06-02 11:02:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
giggle
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-06-01 21:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-06-01 21:02:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-06-01 21:01:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
decent
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2006-06-01 20:44:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
forgot to rate ti
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2006-06-01 20:44:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Just one more question Cody."
"What's that?"
"What are you wearing?"
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-06-01 20:15:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You funny guy, Joe.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-05-19 10:34:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Heh
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-05-19 10:28:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Chazzy (user info) at 2006-05-17 02:52:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I bet Einstein turned himself all sorts of colors before he invented the
lightbulb.
-- Homer Simpson
Bart the Genius
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-05-17 02:39:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-05-16 23:48:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-16 17:40:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Is Mike Hunt there? Can I speak to him?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-05-16 17:26:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
DO YOU HAVE PRINCE ALBERT IN A CAN, WELL DO YA, PUNK?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-05-16 14:54:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
lolocaust
Submitted by ampersand (user info) at 2006-05-16 14:24:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
word
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-05-16 14:23:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*chuckles*
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:27:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
EXCELSIOR!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You like to touchy the kiddies. "Let's play a little game of just the tip."
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:21:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's just a prank call. A guy keeps call this girls house asking what she's wearing. Finally her husband gets on the phone and flips but the caller keeps asking what the husband is wearing. The husband tells him and hangs up. It's not really funny though.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
lollerskates
Submitted by swine_powered_hate_machine (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can understand if you have doubts as to whether or not this happened to me... but it honestly was the best laugh I've had in awhile and the only thing that has occured lately that could have been worthy of my first uber submission.
And I'm curious... how would one pull off a skit involving text messages and a phone call on the radio?
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:12:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hahaha! Pretty damn good.
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The original was titled "What are you wearing?" by Crazy Wally. Fucker.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-05-16 13:05:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahaha. you potentially verbally molested a retarded teenager. cool.
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:54:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:47:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
This is a skit that's played all over the radio. Mancow plays this and so do the local guys in VA. Douche.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:37:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahaha
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:30:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67027
Me too. Here's my take on it.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:24:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It bothered me that Loren became Lauren.
I need to lighten up.
Submitted by StanleyBostitch (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:23:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh, just isn't as funny when its not happening to you
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:21:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't believe you but it was still funny
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:21:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This had so much potential.
Submitted by karates_badboy (user info) at 2006-05-16 12:21:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
amazing.