The lie and how I told it. (705 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.25 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ampersand (View user info) at 2006-06-07 12:59:23 EDT
Travis is a returning character from this story: http://www.ubersite.com/m/86823
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"Yea, I'm Harrison." That was the lie. Here's how I told it.
It was in a seedy, poorly lighted pub that looked like it had seen a lot of stories like this one unfolding lately. It had a vaguely antique feeling, the bottom half of the walls consisted of unpainted walnut slats running vertical. The top half was a once gaudy, now faded design of red and white stripes running diagonally. Flimsy brass lamps punctuated the red and white at perfect intervals, doing their best to appear luxurious. A fancy walnut molding separated the two halves from each other and the ceiling and floor. The whole of it, and the dark red carpet in particular, was stained and soiled with the kind of things Travis' unblinking mechanical eyes told him an honest man didn't want to know anything about.
He was sitting at the bar dressed in his finest Italian suit, and his short hair combed to perfection. His right hand held a single malt scotch, his left rested on the bar with a nearly finished cigar pressed between it's pointer and middle fingers. Her voice behind him was quite a surprise. It was clear and pure; each word was calmly, carefully enunciated. Not what he was expecting to hear. But there it was:
"Are you Mr. Harrison?"
He turned around on his stool, curious to know more about the owner of this most unlikely of voices. Before him stood a young woman, almost exactly five and one half feet tall and slim of stature, weighing approximately 122 pounds. Long and shining black hair cascaded around a fashion model face. Her dress and purse were also black and looked as though they would not be unfit for her, even if she were a fashion model. She was not though, her presence, made him very clear of that.
"Yea, I'm Harrison."
"Come with me."
And she was off, not even bothering to wait and see if he followed, let alone toil with slight pleasantries. Harrison must have gotten himself mixed up in something heavy. Travis wasn't terribly surprised though, they didn't send him in to clean up little messes.
He picked up the briefcase at his feet and followed her out the door and into the backseat of a very expensive German sedan. Sitting in between them was the biggest, strongest, ugliest, and presumably meanest man Travis had ever seen. The man sat with his arms folded and his eyes fixated exactly straight forward at all times. It was not a friendly looking pose. It gave one the simultaneous impressions that the man was both in complete control at all times and yet at no time more then 3 millimeters from completely snapping and killing everyone in sight. The pair of handguns holstered under his jacket strongly reinforced both impressions.
"Aren't you gonna blindfold me or something?"
No one said anything but it drew the man in the middle from his statue-like habits long enough to fix Travis with the kind of one-eyebrow-up glare that made a man's heart stop inside his chest. Fortunately his heart was controlled by one of several microprocessor's in his chest so it kept beating merrily along.
The expensive German sedan rolled quietly through the back-alleys of the city under a dark and starless sky. It was windy and somewhat cold out; the sort of night Travis thought should have rain. At least that would help the almost tangible silence that seemed to hang in the air of the car and crawl down his throat to choke him. Travis was usually a calm, collected individual but he couldn't help fidgeting like a man possessed. The man next to him gave him with a second glare after which he decided he would make no more movements or noises not necessary for survival.
Finally they rolled to a stop in front of one of the large, fancy apartment buildings downtown. If he had a guess, his escort would be taking Travis all the way to the top of the building. A 30 second elevator ride shortly thereafter told him he was right. He stepped off the elevator into a short, plain hallway, marked only by a door with a brass one at the opposite end of where he stood. The woman in the dress stepped off the elevator then and walked on through the door with the one on it, pausing only long enough to tell Travis to wait. The three men waited in the little hallway with Travis, each using the same pose from the car, arms crossed and eyes always on Travis, breaking their vigilance only to blink occasionally.
Travis' legs did not tire but he decided to sit down against the wall and close his eyes for a few minutes anyways. He needed to focus and bring his mind to bear. After seven minutes and twenty-two seconds of waiting in the hallway, the door with the brass one on it swung open and another burly man stepped out.
"Mr. Avery will see you now."
User Reviews
Submitted by LisaD (user info) at 2007-05-18 13:41:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-06-21 05:45:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-13 01:01:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by legallady (user info) at 2006-06-08 12:14:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked the title. Liked the story.
Submitted by DirtyDoubleEntendre (user info) at 2006-06-08 01:37:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU'VE WON MY RANDOM +2 OF THE DAY!!!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-06-07 21:59:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
very nice, to be continued I hope
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2006-06-07 18:35:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. +2 for the lack of response alone. Story was good too.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-06-07 13:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-06-07 13:34:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was written very well--for the most part. You lacked something vital to the story such as body, history, etc. I'm going to have to give you a 1.5 solid.