A Holy War (Part 1) (385 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesLabels: Holy-War
Rating: 0.71 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hourman (View user info) at 2006-06-19 11:37:43 EDT
Nathanial looked around him, maybe one billion strong about to take on an army of unfeasible proportions, seems the odds were always stacked against them. This time, however it seemed somewhat more ominous. This time he could not foresee the outcome. One thing was for sure, many would perish.
His holy armour bore no resemblance to any metal or material, his was weaved of faith and belief, and when combined they create such an inner fire, that will stop, or at least hinder all attacks. His steed, for it was not a horse of such, shuffled in the stillness.
"Hush Godspeed" He whispered, "they will find him, and they will come to us. We must have faith." The steed seemed to relax.
Nathanial wished he could, but so far there were three of the great left, and the other two were out finding the only one who could help.
This was the second line of defence. He knew that if the defenders fell then the gates of heaven could not hold. They must hold this purgatory. The army of heaven was ready for war.
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The Devil sat on his thrown of skulls, his hand resting on the head of one of the damned. He drummed his fingers on the whimpering mans head.
"Is the army ready?" He said, in a slow methodical voice.
"Yes. Ten billion will fight willingly the rest are hurting more than ever in their lives."
"Ten billion?" His fingers stopped drumming, and with great strength they made a ball, popping the head of the man he was resting on. "An army this size has never attacked the gates of heaven before."
"Sir?" The General stood up.
"What?"
"We need a leader. We need a leader worthy of commanding such a force."
"Am I not worthy!?" The Master of Darkness took too his massive height.
"Master, I only meant we cannot risk losing you on the field, which would never happen, but of course we can't lose you."
The Devils' chest puffed in and out releasing smoke with every exhale and seeming to suck in all the light with every inhale.
"He slumped in his Throne of Bone,
"Hmm agreed, we need someone of unimaginable evil. We need someone so violent that they would have no problem in bringing darkness and suffering to mankind."
"Surely there is someone." Snivelled the cowering peon.
"Yes. There is one."
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*Johnny's in the basement mixing up the medicine, I'm on the pavement thinking about the government, a man...*
"Dude."
"What?"
"Is it Halloween?"
"It's January you Fucktard"
"Oh yeah. Dude, do you fancy skinning up another one?"
"No. Why did you ask about Halloween?"
"Oh yeah, there are two guys dressed up as angels on your street. Could just be the gear playing tricks. I'm going to go and make a cheese toasty."
"Make me one too man."
"Make your own!" Mark trundled down the stairs.
Dan looked around his room, his vision was somewhat hazy. He was jamming out listening to Dylan playing some killer air harmonica when the doorbell went.
"Mark!" He listened. "MARK!" Nothing. Fucking reprobate must have made his toasty and left.
Dan flung open the door.
"What the fuck do you-"He stared in disbelief. "What do you fags want?"
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Dan woke up. He looked around, and really wished Mark was with him just for the obligatory "Dude, this ain't Kansas no fucking more." Wizard of Oz is never unappreciated by a Stoner.
A man entered surrounded by some weird swirling shit. Dan had had enough.
"Fuck you man, what the fuck is going on?"
"You are needed Dante."
"Call me that again ass clown, I dare you."
"Ha! You have a long task ahead of you. We have five years to train you. In your world, minutes will pass. Here, well, here you will see."
"Dude, you could have at least warned me. Anyway enough of this hippy shit I'm going home."
"Dude" The Angel said in a mocking voice "You are home, and you're right...you're not in Kansas Dorothy."
To be continued part 1
User Reviews
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-06 07:14:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-05 09:54:26 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am going to rate every one of your posts with a +2 without reading them.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-06-20 09:13:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm torn. Your grammar and such makes this a difficult read, but obviously I read it anyway. Now, that can either be attributed to your skills as a storyteller or the face that I am at work by MYSELF today and quite bored.
Either way. I'm going to give it a zero and go read part 2.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-06-20 07:10:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
This is certainly amongst the worst grammar and spelling I have seen on Uber. There's an idea in there, I'm sure, but it's hard to discern from the words. "...rested on his thrown of skulls.."? C'mon. Hope part 2 is better.
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2006-06-19 13:24:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In reading this, I am terribly reminded of the movie "Dogma" mixed with something that has the words "Bill and Ted's" in the title. Not terribly new but certainly containing many possibilities for story lines. The spelling and grammar errors detract from what could be a possibly interesting idea if filled out a bit more. This was worth reading, and I'm looking forward to part 2. Before you post it, may I humbly suggest proofreading aloud and using the grammar checker as well as the spell checker in your word processor program.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-06-19 12:12:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hah. Stoners going to save the world. A true underdogs story. Can't wait for part deux.
Submitted by GDR (user info) at 2006-06-19 11:58:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Would of been a +2 if I didn't have to wait! ARGH
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2006-06-19 11:51:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hmmmmm.... hmmmmmm... hmmmmm...
I'm undecided on this one. The story is original enough (I've not seen a movie involving satan attacking the pearly gates), but it needs more description and narration...
Just my opinion.