Picture, if you will... (762 hits)
Category: HumorRating: -0.58 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ticklish_squirrel (View user info) at 2006-06-20 13:30:40 EDT
A tranquil forest with tall evergreens, wee-little bunnies, and dainty wildflowers. Now, in the middle of all this serenity, picture a pond. Hovering about six inches above the pond there is a small, black fly. Just below the surface of the pond there is a fish. This fish is watching the fly with hunger in his eye and the fish thinks to himself "If that fly drops down about six inches, I'm going to swim up and eat that fly!"
Wading in the pond, not far from that fish, is a fisherman with a net. He's wathing the fish watch the fly, he does a simple equation, and thinks to himself "Man, if that fly drops six inches, that fish will swim up and catch that fly and I'm gonna scoop me up that fish!"
Back on shore, there's a big, brown bear hunkered down behind a bush and he's watching the whole scene - the fisherman watching the fish watch the fly, and the brown bear thinks to himself "Shucks, if that fly drops six inches, the fish is going to swim up and catch the fly, fisherman's going to scoop up that fish, and I'm going to take it from the fisherman when he gets back to shore!"
Peeking out from behind a little rock is a little mouse who's watching the ordeal - the bear watching the fisherman watching the fish watch the fly and the mouse thinks to himself "Jeepers, if that fly drops six inches, that fish will swim up and catch the fly, fisherman will scoop up the fish, brown bear will attack the fisherman and I'll get the fisherman's whole picnic basket to myself!"
Well, there's a kitty-cat sitting on an old stump studying the mouse watching the bear watching the fisherman watching the fish watch the fly and the kitty-cat thinks to herself "Interesting, if that fly drops six inches, that fish will swim up to catch the fly, the fisherman will scoop up the fish, the brown bear will attack the fisherman, that mouse will run for the picnic basket and I'm going to catch that little morsel for lunch while he's distracted! Purrrfect."
Sure enough - the fly drops six inches, fish swims up and eats the fly, fisherman scoops up the fish, bear lunges towards the fisherman, mouse scurries towards the picnic basket, kitty-cat leaps off the stump to catch the mouse but she slips and falls in the water... do you know what the moral of the story is?
Fly drops six inches... pussy's gettin' wet!
User Reviews
Submitted by mynameisandy (user info) at 2006-12-07 19:29:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't read it. -2 DIE!
Submitted by eppliks (user info) at 2006-06-20 21:42:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking stupid.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-06-20 16:51:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Chad_Sexington (user info) at 2006-06-20 14:55:17 (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
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YOU'RE still around?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-06-20 16:27:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
WOOD EYE?
WOOD EYE?
FAT ASS!
FAT ASS!
Submitted by Chad_Sexington (user info) at 2006-06-20 14:55:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by ticklish_squirrel (user info) at 2006-06-20 14:45:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry to disappoint everyone... it cracked me up, tee-hee
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2006-06-20 14:25:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
That joke like, totally kicked ass when I was in 6th grade.
Now that I'm all grownded-up, I'm all like, "Hmph. Stupid cat."
For sure.
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-06-20 14:06:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
not bad but i've heard it before
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:52:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Canto (directed across the valley): "jgREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEnniiiiiiing"
Respondu (from across the valley): "Shitty AAAAAAAAlter alerrrrrrt"
Submitted by GDR (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:49:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOLY SHIT!!!!!! HAHAHAHHAHAHH!!!! I TOTALLY DID NOT SEE THAT ONE COMING!!! You sir, are a comedic genius. Provacative, intelligent, my goodness what a punch line! Wow! How do you come up with this kind of stuff, is what I've always wanted to know! I mean, I've tried my hand at a few gag punch lines and stuff, but never have I seen brilliant work like this! YOU MUST MAKE SO MUCH MONEY WRITING JOKES!!!
Gosh, I really hope to see more of your work around here. Really top notch, sir, top notch.
Submitted by CrazyCanuck (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:43:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Old and dull.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:42:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
*zzzzzzzzzz*
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:35:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
i learned this joke in girl scouts when i was 10.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-06-20 13:31:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
wheres the picture