Voices of Überusers II (1155 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.45 on 64 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (View user info) at 2006-06-22 16:25:15 EDT
Voices of Überusers I - http://www.ubersite.com/m/89283
Sacrilicious covered my "Libido Honalee," and apparently wound up sounding like a Liliputian 900 line operator. Because the Orgasmatron is a benevolent god, he passed the savings on to you, the public, for free. Huzzah, huzzah, huzzah. This offering also kicked off a slew of voicewhores that, while satisfying many an Ubery ear, cut down on the number of guessable suspects for future instances of this series. OR DID IT? As my grandmother said when she found out a colony of fire ants had taken up residence in her duodenum: "Aces."
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So here we are again, you and I, looking down the barrel of another helping of the Ivory Coast's new favorite game show "Guess That Uberuser." Poetry is again being used as the medium for this exercise, but the piece is not mine (but +2 for the user that links it here in a reply).
Will YOU be able to uncover the identity of this individual?
Will YOU use this knowledge for good, or for awesome?
Will YOU be able to tell me the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow, OR the capital of Assyria?
Let's see.
Here's one of our ranks giving their reading of "About a Boy."
About A Boy.mp3 (1 MB) [audio/mpeg]
User Reviews
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-06-30 00:45:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice voice - Just enough proper brit without too much accent
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-27 07:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Change instrument to 'real instrument' and set to your mike input.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-06-27 07:34:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-23 09:02:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm English. I would do one of these if I wan't such a computer retard. I've have a iMac for about 18 months and don't know how to use the fucker.
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It has a built in microphone
Load up garage band and have a play around. Beano to music awaits
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I'm on it.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-06-26 23:33:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (loser info) @ who in the fuck cares
bla bla bla, bla-bla, blaaaaa bla
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Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:32:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Just ignore that old fuck
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-26 22:50:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-06-26 22:31:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
plus of course i have class.
===
IS THAT YOU APOLLO?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/89623
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-06-26 22:31:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
plus of course i have class.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-06-23 12:24:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-23 02:28:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to see if I can get Davs to do a duet with me.
______________
You might as well ask him to lick your undercarriage as well.
ATTN GHEY MENZ.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-23 10:42:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sigh. Nice way to ruin the surprise already.
Now I know why I miss having skype. I adore your voice.
Good choice of poems, too.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-23 10:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Mysterons (user info) at 2006-06-23 05:18:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
The Orgasmatron Is Our Agent, And Is Under Our Control Through The Powers Of Retrometabolism!
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You have no hope to survive. Make your time.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-23 09:02:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm English. I would do one of these if I wan't such a computer retard. I've have a iMac for about 18 months and don't know how to use the fucker.
---
It has a built in microphone
Load up garage band and have a play around. Beano to music awaits
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-06-23 07:55:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:38:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
I vote for Redskieslookfake or maybe Berty since those are the only two Uber people I'm sure are English.
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I'm English. I would do one of these if I wan't such a computer retard. I've have a iMac for about 18 months and don't know how to use the fucker.
Submitted by The_Mysterons (user info) at 2006-06-23 05:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This Is The Voice Of The Mysterons.
We Know That You Can Hear Us Earthman.
GREEN CIRCLE
BLUE CIRCLE
The Orgasmatron Is Our Agent, And Is Under Our Control Through The Powers Of Retrometabolism!
You Can't Stop Us Earthmen!
SPOOKY MUSIC
RED CIRCLE
SPECTRUM AGENT GLANCES UP UNEASILY AS A BLUE CIRCLE TRAVERSES HIS FACE
We Will Have Our Revenge!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-23 02:28:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Saliva crackling?
I blame my microphone. It sounds duller than my usual accent too.
I'm going to see if I can get Davs to do a duet with me.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2006-06-23 01:13:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i've come to the conclusion that i don't really like english accents..they're either snooty sounding or impossible to understand
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-06-23 00:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
redskies. the voice matches the sad smile.
i'm not gonna say sexy, although it is really. but more soothing. the kind of voice that makes you stop sobbing.
back to laundry and cd burning now...
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 23:33:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 21:46:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 19:07:44 (#)
Ranking: 2
(but +2 for the user that links it here in a reply).
======
I am officially an insufferable bitch.
---
Do you get a plaque and decoder ring and such?
=======
I wish. Just a copy of Ann Coulter's new book and a lifetime supply of diurex.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-06-22 22:52:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's Jake, without a doubt.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-06-22 22:24:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was pleasant. I do have to agree about the saliva crackling previously mentioned. But nice, overall. There's nothing you can do, really.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 21:46:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-06-22 19:24:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
The steady stream of -2's really started with the contest.
Prior to that, I probably only -2ed 50% of your posts.
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Oh you know what I mean, you little hawk-nosed mouthbreathing love of mine.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 19:07:44 (#)
Ranking: 2
(but +2 for the user that links it here in a reply).
======
I am officially an insufferable bitch.
---
Do you get a plaque and decoder ring and such?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-06-22 19:24:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The steady stream of -2's really started with the contest.
Prior to that, I probably only -2ed 50% of your posts.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 19:07:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
(but +2 for the user that links it here in a reply).
======
I am officially an insufferable bitch.
I didn't see this earlier, O.
I'm sorry.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:38:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I vote for Redskieslookfake or maybe Berty since those are the only two Uber people I'm sure are English.
Submitted by ThoreauMe (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:32:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Haha. just fuckin' with you.
Submitted by ThoreauMe (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll do one.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:08:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, and to whomever this is, I am honored that of all the things you could read, you chose an ode to my favorite 7-year old.
And Coleslaw, thanks for the linkwhore.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 18:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:19:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
It was pretty damn obvious it was Licious on the last one.
All that "I don't know who that is but she sounds like a whore." from Licious sealed it. Because only she knows how much of a whore she is.
This one is definitely me. Without a doubt.
=============
LIES, ALL LIES!
No wait..that's sort of profound.
And this isn't you. You don't respect my work enough to choose a piece I wrote.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:58:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll do one of these I suppose.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:34:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I preferred Sacrilicious' voicewhore. Once I hear the sound of someone, I hear all their work and comments in their accent too.
Anyway - my point is that I'd rather listen to female voices than some bloke's.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So basically I shouldn't ever reply to people who leave comments that blow my skirt up?
Can you see that I'm not replying to the rating but to the attitude and/or position that's driving the reply? And that I'd reply the same way if they left the same comment with a +1 or +2?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:32:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:02:50 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:54:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
Yup- my auto -2 button still functions.
When are you gonna post something worth a shit? I seem to recall that you used to.
---
Funny. I've always been under the impression that you've -2d a good 98% of my stuff here. And even when you +2d it you'd have something "witty" to say.
It touches me that you're concerned about the quality of my work. It really does.
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Just ignore that old fuck, he's like that crazy uncle that came back from 'Nam never quite right, drinking rye whisky from the bottle and constantly poking a shotgun filled with rock salt into the shrubbery, looking for 'Charlie'...
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:30:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:29:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
caulaincourt I just love it when you call me a little bitch, I can just imagine you purring it in your sexy faux french accent
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:26:10 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:22:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well you put on a brave face and act like you don't care, but I know you care, otherwise you wouldn't bitch every time somebody gives you a negative rating,
===
While I think PFF is a bit of a little bitch, he's often right. As in this case.
---
Shh you two. Kiss and make up or something.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:29:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
DC Woody?
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:29:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
caulaincourt I just love it when you call me a little bitch, I can just imagine you purring it in your sexy faux french accent
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:26:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:22:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well you put on a brave face and act like you don't care, but I know you care, otherwise you wouldn't bitch every time somebody gives you a negative rating,
===
While I think PFF is a bit of a little bitch, he's often right. As in this case.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:25:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes it does.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:23:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:17:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
pff, do you still have the ratings drop down when you go to review? Can you apply a rating but it just defaults to a zero when you hit the rank button? Just curious.
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does this answer your question?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:22:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:19:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
It was pretty damn obvious it was Licious on the last one.
All that "I don't know who that is but she sounds like a whore." from Licious sealed it. Because only she knows how much of a whore she is.
This one is definitely me. Without a doubt.
---
It's an Englishman though - unless you're a master of accents
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:22:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well you put on a brave face and act like you don't care, but I know you care, otherwise you wouldn't bitch every time somebody gives you a negative rating, I doubt my ratings will ever be "reinstated" but if I did, I would probably just -2 everything, and since it would appear that I would give a -2 rating even if I came across something I actually liked, it wouldn't do anything, so my ratings wouldn't count whether I had them or not
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:21:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Doesn't sound Northern to me.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:19:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It was pretty damn obvious it was Licious on the last one.
All that "I don't know who that is but she sounds like a whore." from Licious sealed it. Because only she knows how much of a whore she is.
This one is definitely me. Without a doubt.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:17:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
pff, do you still have the ratings drop down when you go to review? Can you apply a rating but it just defaults to a zero when you hit the rank button? Just curious.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:15:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not me Coleslaw.
I'm an American.
I like this game though.
And I know who this is.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:15:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey fuckface, I'm not complaining about the ratings Harrelson gives me. I'm simply saying that it's not like he's ever been that thrilled with my submissions and, because of that, it's funny to hear him say that I've been posting shit lately. As, really, what does it matter what my posts are like if he's not going to enjoy them anyway?
You're free to think whatever you like about whatever I write - you're your own man. Hopefully you'll be able to leave ratings that "mean something" one day, so I can properly taste the stink of your fist. I'll be sure to piss myself in frustration and cry myself to sleep over the shards of my shattered ego.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:14:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
teh voice is PFF!
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:13:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*swoons*
Is it Berty? Or Redskies? I bet Redskies.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:08:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:43:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know the names of most of the english blokes but I can say this: it's obviously not apollo because it's not just a series of grunts followed by some clapping and a "WOO! YAY! BALLOONS!"
===================================================================================
And this made me laugh. I <3 FA.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:07:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
orgasmatron you really have to stop bitching, if I still had ratings I'd -2 every single post you've ever written, because I'm not interested in it, even the most popular thing on earth has it's haters, get over yourself
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:04:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I couldn't get it to play (last one either). I'm going guess anyway though...I'm going Stagger Lee. Is he still around? I've been gone for awhile.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:03:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:00:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Poem by Licious: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85538
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YES, and you've received your +2.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:03:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't know who it is, but it's a nice voice. Very soothing. I'd say it was an attractive voice, but that may only the accent, and I don't know if it's attached to a fatty or not.
Yes, I'm superficial. Blow me.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:02:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:54:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
Yup- my auto -2 button still functions.
When are you gonna post something worth a shit? I seem to recall that you used to.
---
Funny. I've always been under the impression that you've -2d a good 98% of my stuff here. And even when you +2d it you'd have something "witty" to say.
It touches me that you're concerned about the quality of my work. It really does.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-06-22 17:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this was FUPA.
Poem by Licious: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85538
Voice: Scourge?
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:56:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AUSTRALIA DRAWS
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:54:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yup- my auto -2 button still functions.
When are you gonna post something worth a shit? I seem to recall that you used to.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:43:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know the names of most of the english blokes but I can say this: it's obviously not apollo because it's not just a series of grunts followed by some clapping and a "WOO! YAY! BALLOONS!"
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
where are the guys that sound like michael caine? aren't there any cockneys out there in uberland?
of all these voices, most of them sound like those english actors in nazi movies.
i'm curious...why don't they ever get germans to play those roles, or at least englishmen that can do german accents. it's annoying.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:37:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I could listen to that voice all night. It's so nice and soothing. Charming accent too.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:35:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:29:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
ghola...without a doubt
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I resent that.
Also, I have no clue who this is.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:34:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i hate earing "saliva clicking".
i bet this guy has white spit in the corner of his mouth
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:33:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:27:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
I know who this is because he (or she) sent it to me the other day. I thought he (or she)would sound a lot more northern.
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Then we certainly know that this user is "cheeky."
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:32:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
davros?
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:29:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oops
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:29:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ghola...without a doubt
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-06-22 16:27:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know who this is because he (or she) sent it to me the other day. I thought he (or she)would sound a lot more northern.