I prefer a straight fight to all this sneaking around (bad punctionation, grammar, and spelling will insue<--jk)too long (1016 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: -0.61 on 64 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Poots (View user info) at 2006-07-03 11:32:06 EDT
I think I'm going to die soon because of an insane person.
My friend, we will call him Nick because that's his fucking name, was a crazy son of a bitch. I knew him for fifteen years and he was without a doubt one of the craziest son of a bitches I have ever met. You can also chalk up insesitive to other peoples wants/needs, arrogant, mean spirited, depressed,...we will just say complete sosciopatt cause this list could go on for fuck ever literally. Anyhow, this s.o.b. was one of my best friends for the 15 years I mentioned earlier. He was really into Roberto Deniro, JFK, nascar, getting into fights and animals.(make sense of that shit!) Sometimes getting into fights with animals. Sometimes getting into fights about J.F.K. Sometimes getting into fights bout nascar etc. etc etc. Needless to say he liked to fight which was good, like if someone was fucking with me, which never happened, he would fuck them up for me, and bad like I was always scared that if I breathed wrong he would fuck me up.(good times)
Well he did try to fuck me up one night because I was going to leave town for a while and maybe visit every holiday just to stay on everyones good graces. I was going to live in Florida with my brother and do film work at F.S.U. in thier film department. By film work I mean I was going to be handing out film supplies to the students as the saw fit to use them. Not the most admirable postion to hold but it beat the hell out of delivering pizzas or the what other inane dealing with rednecks job I could scrounge. Plus I was going to be with my brother whom I missed like crazy. Anyhow that was his fucking reason for swinging at me, he was terrible drunk and couldn't hit shit, but he could grab well enough and he choked the shit out of me. <-(scary redneck shit right there.) His brother was there when this was happening and he said he was goig to go call the cops or some shit. When he came back from the the phone I was laying there en gaurd style, yelling for help while Nick was about to pummel me. Brad, his brother who probably got a a beating once a week from this sick asshole, pushed him off of me which I will be eternally gratefull for. He held him back while I made Flash Gordon tracks for my house which was 2 blocks away. But that was his excuse for wanting to pummel me into bits. "You were going to move away." I never talked to the police about the incident.
I hid, much like yoda hid from the emperor, from the sorry ass mother fucker that called me a friend. I didn't want anything to do with anymore but it's hard to hide from someone that knows your address, work place, and phone number. He came over alot, in the 6 months that I hid, and would bang on the door. I'd watch him leave my house cursing and spitting and slamming his truck door shut behind him style which was good fun for the whole neighborhood. In 6 months of hiding this mother fucker never got the point that I did not want sexual relations with him. I mean to be his friend, although he did show signs of homosexuality I don't think he was 100% gay. Maybe just part gay or something....I'll tell you some other time.
After the 6 months I thought "well fuck, maybe I should sit down with the guy and have a talk, we've know each other so long maybe we could see eye to eye about things." WRONG ANSWER BIOTCH!
I invited him over to hang out and have a talk. He said that sounded fine to him and maybe we could go out to a bar and have a few drinks. I was apprehensive about drinking with him but I was in the turning a new leaf kind of mood. So he came to my house and his father drove him. His dad yelled "take care of our boy" I said "I will mr. soandso." And gave my buddy my friend my...a big ass hug. We talked about things, mostly his things, which wasn't unusual he always did like to talk about himself. He told me a funny story about this girl that he had sex with in the butt. And he told about same said girls sister getting a broken nose because he punched her in it. He told me that when we go out to the bar that the old nick was not going to show up. Not just tol, swore on god almighty and his grannies' grave and einstiens' dick and what the fuck ever.
"I weel not get us into trouble, I'm so happy to see you nothing can make me angry" sorts of things like that
"ok"
There was an expo going on in my town at that time which is big shit around here. All the fucking hills are emptied for the worst of the worst. You got slobbering drunk, shirtless, over tanned, mulleted redneck. You got slap happy Susan and her 16 chilluns. And the blacks hate the whites and the whites hate everybody and bullshit after bullshit after bullshit.
We didn't go to that mother fuckin thing. I just brought it up because they have a brilliant fireworks display on the second or third night. That same night. We went to my bar. Well my friends bar but it was cheersy enough for me to call it my bar. Which was awesome because the expo wasn't far off and we had to walk two blocks to get to it. The fireworks were just starting up. I walk in, light up a smoke, and head to the bar for two jager bombs. 1 for me 1 for him. Then we sit and talk and bullshit about his shit and never talk about him going nutzo on me for no reason.
It gets hazy..memory is getting blurrier.
He goes crazy and I learned from past experiences that it was cool to fuck with him when he's crazy. He started fights with chicks and arguments with dudes. He started stumbling and mumbling when I saw him. Which wasn't too frequent because I was trying to get some nice lady to insist I take her away from this cruel hard world and make her my love slave for enternity. Anyhow, he was getting bad drunk, like punch a mother fucker drunk, and I went up to my friend, the owner, and he said he was going to have to kick him out. I said "fine get him a ride because ms. givesmehead is looking nice tonight and I'm staying here for a bit". I don't know what time it was I didn't look at a clock Nick came up to me and said "I'm leaving" I said "that's cool I'm staying" because of ms. givesmehead. We had discussed earlier arrangements for him to get a ride from his paw if we got too drunk. I just figured "hey he did something responsible, good for him." Gave him a hug and watched him walk away.
As he did I saw him lock eyes with this guy a little too long and my friend drove a wild swing in his direction that came nowhere near hitting him. The dude swung back with a viscious hit that knocked my friend backwards. Then his five buddies came out of nowhere and started pounding on him. I was trying to get trough the swarm of people to get between Nick and his assailents. No dice. He got beat up pretty bad but I really did not care. He asked for it. Was always asking for it. He finally got it....*shrug*
They ushered him out and held back the other guys while they did so. Talking to them or whatever talking to my buddy who owned the bar to ammend hurt feelings. Forgot completely about Nick.
I woke up the next day to a massive hang over. The events the night before were disturbing but I had to be at work at 3 and it was probably 1 when I woke up. I called his dad at like 2 and asked if he had seen Nick. He said he hadn't and 3 days later I was looking at his dead body floating in the Kentucky river.
I don't know the details of what happened after he left the bar. I know he didn't like well anybody but espicially black people. I imagine him saying "out of my way nigger" to the wrong black person while he crossed the concrete bridge and that mother fucker through him in.
His crazy family blames me sort of. I don't know why I guess they are angry which is understandable. But I had nothing to do with it but I am sorry I wish I had never tried to rebecome his friend. I wish I never tried to be a human being to a inhumane fucker. I wish I never ever met him. Years of my life would have been much better if I hadn't. I just took it, the good with the bad, and loved him unconditionally. What a fucking stupid thing of me to do.
User Reviews
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-12-09 12:41:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-07-05 01:20:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2006-07-05 00:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
niet te lezen, ook niet met m'n ogen dicht.
Submitted by BrownEyedGirrl (user info) at 2006-07-04 18:55:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:58:39 (#)
Ranking: -2
Poots, I could dog every fucking sentence you ATTEMPT to write. You suck.
Damn near 60 reviews, and 30 of them are yours. I won't help put this piece
of shit on most heated, so this is it.
Also, your sense of humor is a pile of crap. So are you. Have a nice life,
alter boy.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 14:17:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ok I see it now. I'm propelling the shit by talking back to the people that deal the shit. Like a shit hole, it's only going to get filled by adding more shit to it. Maybe that similie doesn't work.
Maybe it's like a snowball that you tip at the top of the mountain. It gets bigger and bigger as it falls. It may even start an avalanche. From now on, no shit talking will come from Poots.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 14:04:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Another fan of poots lost. Boo hoo I can't stand it. What will I ever do without bubba in my life? Look man just because I fucked your sister you don't gotta go and get all mad and shit.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:58:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Poots, I could dog every fucking sentence you ATTEMPT to write. You suck.
Damn near 60 reviews, and 30 of them are yours. I won't help put this piece
of shit on most heated, so this is it.
Also, your sense of humor is a pile of crap. So are you. Have a nice life,
alter boy.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:54:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Actually I did the other night when I was boning your sister in Florida. She got beached becasue of the hurricane scare and I laid into her good. Not to try and help her so much as to try and see if I could inseminate an actuall whale. Turns out she's your sister. Small world.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:52:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Plus bubba you took one sentence from that whole paragraph of shit and dogged it. That's what the fuck I'm talking about. Little fucking nitpicking bullshit. Then calling me a dipshit or stupid shit or whatever.
Don't you see the error in your logic?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:49:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Whales are awesome fucks. You should try it, right after you
learn to write.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:46:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Actually bubba I do see the error. Your right I should just bend over and take it in the ass like how you showed me on that beached whale in santa maria.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:44:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
it sure shows.
Submitted by ArcEld (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:40:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Nobody cares.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:39:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No bubba I do not. I just recently passed that knowledge on to you guys. See the error in logic old fuck. Go bit a horses cock!
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:38:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You know I don't start shit with people...I said that earlier and I was wrong. This motherfucker jgreening, and all the rest, just decided to come in and try to piss me off, which you can't do. He did that. I had nothing to do with his decision. I don't understand why when someone talks shit back it offends people.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:38:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 11:51:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
Paul..I'm not being silly here but you should read the stuff that people say about it. I know it's course and jagged. I only have internet access at work. I'm too poor to afford a pc and an internet connection. So when it is slow, which it never completely is, I take the opportunity to post here and stuff. I simply do not have the time, in between interruptions, to make it perfect. Most of my posts are going to be sloppy and have bad grammar, bad punctuation, bad structure. I realise that that is the case and a lot of people will not accept it, however I simply can't do it anyother way. I know that is not your guys fault. I am not taking the fact that I do not have the time and the privaleges that you guys have out on you guys. I do wish that instead of those dull inane "fuck yous", trashed worn out"-2 dies" and redundant overly used ways of telling someone to abort themselves would vanish. They are conterproductive. They are overused. They make no sense in a world that makes no sense.
Why not try to help a mother fucker every once in a while instead of kicking him while he is down?
_______________________
What good would help do if you don't have time to do it correctly?
See the fault in your logic? Dumb shit.
Submitted by ArcEld (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:31:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who cares?
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:24:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your probably right on there jgreening. Nobody cares what you think. I hope you get your dick stuck in a light socket.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:16:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well.
Lesse how much I care...
Shit, broke the mocroscope.
Oh well, I guess the world is better off not knowing, cocksmear.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 13:02:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
And you encoraged me to do it one more time jgreening.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-07-04 12:59:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Jeesus, dipshit, you spam yourself more than WhatTheHell used to...
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 12:02:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
thanks Molari.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 11:51:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Paul..I'm not being silly here but you should read the stuff that people say about it. I know it's course and jagged. I only have internet access at work. I'm too poor to afford a pc and an internet connection. So when it is slow, which it never completely is, I take the opportunity to post here and stuff. I simply do not have the time, in between interruptions, to make it perfect. Most of my posts are going to be sloppy and have bad grammar, bad punctuation, bad structure. I realise that that is the case and a lot of people will not accept it, however I simply can't do it anyother way. I know that is not your guys fault. I am not taking the fact that I do not have the time and the privaleges that you guys have out on you guys. I do wish that instead of those dull inane "fuck yous", trashed worn out"-2 dies" and redundant overly used ways of telling someone to abort themselves would vanish. They are conterproductive. They are overused. They make no sense in a world that makes no sense.
Why not try to help a mother fucker every once in a while instead of kicking him while he is down?
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 11:34:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I prefer a straight fight to all this sneaking around (bad punctionation, grammar, and spelling will insue<--jk)too long
---
there you go Paul
Submitted by Molari (user info) at 2006-07-04 11:33:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow... some ppl are just fucked up like that... you have been a good friend to him poots. You have done well by him. Don't let the past get you down, move on knowing you did the best you could.
Submitted by Paul_Monroe (user info) at 2006-07-04 11:17:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey poots you should review your own post
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 10:41:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry sacrilicious I didn't want to make you angry or annoyed. I wanted the people that annoyed me to feel the same annoyance that I felt. These people come out and lurk like wraiths in the shadows. They feed on the weak and I can't stand for that. So I retract my plans to retire and offer my services as an uber-justiceleagues esque thingy. I will get banned I'm sure but I don't really give a fuck.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 10:09:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I will just go away forever
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 10:08:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
should I not do that?
should I not voice my concerns?
should I let indignant mother fuckers skate?
should I let boredom take me?
should I let people be mean and just let them get away with it?
should I go away from here and never return?
should I smoke weed and do a hullah dance for you?
should I send to a cliffs edge get you naked on all fours and push?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-07-04 10:06:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I tried to read this - and while my eyes did bleed a lot - there were a few good things about it. Please use proper paragraphs.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-04 10:05:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's because I go around and start shit with everyone I already know.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-07-03 15:33:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Unreadable.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 14:08:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fishbowl stomach... that's what I will call Johnny from now on.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 14:06:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hilarious hypocracy that's what it is. it's fucking funny trust me.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 14:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
lemme start over...Read Johnny-sweep the leg-xmans comment on my post then go to his post about guacamole. Surely you will see the hilarious contradiction.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 14:01:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I mean this post. I don't think you will stop laughing.. I haven't, seriously I can't quit laughing and thinking about guac.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:59:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
well thanks now please someone please go to xmans post about guacamole it's very very very good.
You should read his comment on my post first.
Submitted by GDR (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:57:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"I think I'm going to die soon because of an insane person."
All I read, but reminded me of the daughters mother... amen.
Submitted by dove666 (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:55:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Because you got me to read the whole thing.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:43:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
interesting story. needs a bit of editing, as loki pointed out.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:25:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I guess this is the guacamole recipe posting site. My bad dude I din't mean to to throw a wrench in your cogs.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:22:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHAHAHA I found you using uber as if it were AIM on the very first post I clicked on xman your an ass I hope you have an applesauce overdose.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hope you like -2's xman. I've seen you use this motherfucker in the same manner.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:16:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to get ripped for using a fight club quote in an argument aren't I?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:11:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:07:25 (#)
Ranking: -2
I took it and you came back for more as if it were a chat room. I rule you I know you can't get enough of the poots man. It's cool baby you come chat with poots anytime. And for your info a BUTT LOAD of people use this site as a chat room.
-----
auto -2 for not knowing the difference between AIM and Uber.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:10:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I told you the grammar would be bad..*shrug* you people don't listen. I even made a joke about it in the title...and still you don't listen. How about you just take the story for what it is a story. See when I tell a story I don't think about how the words I'm saying are spelled in my head. I don't think about puncutation when I am talking. You may but uh that doesn't make you special in any way. You are apart of the same decaying matter as everyone else. The Queen is a slave to the worker bees. I wish I could help you.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:07:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I took it and you came back for more as if it were a chat room. I rule you I know you can't get enough of the poots man. It's cool baby you come chat with poots anytime. And for your info a BUTT LOAD of people use this site as a chat room. Just to let you know incase you haven't noticed
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:05:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"9-1-1 operator, how may I help you?"
"Yes, get me the grammar police to 132 W. ******* St. immediately"
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2006-07-03 13:02:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ok so your gay or not, I dont care.
run along, for real, go on.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:56:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I mean I know what it means to be a fairy. Your calling me gay? If so where in that story did you get the implication that I was gay. Because I said I loved another man? If that's the case then I am a sthraight up faggot bitch....ththththththththt sounds like steam escaping-stripes I think-. To love a man doesn't mean you want to have anal relationships with that man. It sounds funny now, fuck it I'm a queer sure.
If you meant a winged creature with mystical powers that bit a hot women in Labrynth then I'm all for that too. Gimme some of dat lovely Jennifer Connely. I would shred you that albino's got nothig on me baby.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:52:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
1. A funny response.
2. A nod to your gay/ not gay relationship.
3. Quoted from the Dodge Magnum TV commercial,at the end where the fairy turns the bad ass pit bull guy into a preppy with poodles.
It's better if you don't ask for any explanations, this is not a chat room. Take the "-2" and run along.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
wtf does that mean fallen?
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:41:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'd rather shit on your forehead spook.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:39:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
haha, silly little fairy.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:33:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Blah blah fucking blah.
I'd rather read a toothpaste label.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:29:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
damn I just reread it..Fucks sake alive I made quite a few errors...*rapes self with chainsaw*
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:29:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And anyone can be tooted?
-- Homer Simpson, on tutoring
The Way We Was
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 12:25:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
nobody is in the mood to talk some shit?
that's good....
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:50:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not going to -2 this even though it was written really badly. I feel sorry for you becuase blame is so easy to give out. uck irrationality.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:43:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you were warned of the rawness
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:42:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
thanks for that kaos-
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:41:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow just wow
(you're going to catch shit for this being so, hmm shall we say raw)
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:41:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Um... your name is "Poots?"
This wasn't very good. Sorry.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2006-07-03 11:32:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I immediately regret the discion to write this..Now I feel all mad and shit.