Dead Like Me (885 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.5 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Darko (View user info) at 2006-07-07 12:08:45 EDT
"You fucking lip off to me one more time I will fucking haul off and hit 'cha!"
In this smallish Irish family, Donald McCullough knew his limits. Mayhap an extra five minutes out before his mother called him in for the night, or an extra serving of the nightly stew; Donnie's momma didn't raise no fools. "Just do what she wants tonight, for goodness sake" (the latter 'goodness" changed to "fucks" in his later, teenage, years) "Just do what is raight tonight, and maychance you'll go straighton ta bed wit' out a beatin'"
Donnie laid his slight body on the dark carpet before his mother's bedroom. The napp of the rug, thick and smelt of cigarettes and chemicals, brushed against the youngster's face. Peering into the sanctum sanctorum of his mother's small apartment, Donnie understood the influence of Satan on his previous mommy's heart. Something to do with a slender shiny straw mama seemed really interested in. Always sucking at the air, always a match or lighter under the swollen bulb at the end of it, always twirling the thing like a drum major; a fucking slut twirling a dick, Don thought later on.
Fuck those mother fuckers who let that poison rule their worlds.
---
The blow knocked Larry Welsh from his chair. The seventeen year old had been in trouble before, but never like this. Another strike rained down upon his head.
"THOU shalt not sin, Larry! Do you thin the man Jesus was laughing when 'ee proclaimed thus upon all his chillins? No! Never laughing, sins is the laud's business, Larry! THOU SHALT NOT SIN IN THE FACE OF THY LAUD!" Maggie Welsh had a way with the scripture that non of heah chillin's evah forgot.
It was time for Larry James Welsh to leave his custodian's care and strike out on his own. Some work at a pizzeria/wing shop here, a job as dishwasher here; Larry never really understood what it was to work and make your way through the world. These small jobs slipped through his fingers like so much fine sand. As innocent and as pure as he was from his poisoned guardianship, he was to fall into the trap.
A day, a week. Living from flat to flat, street to street. What to do to survive, what to do to get by.
Larry smoked his first sherm stick in June. By July, he was addicted to another world, none that anyone in his life prepared him for. One where anything goes, anything went. Get you high, get you by. The one constant of the street.
---
Don McCullough chose Psychology. Specialist in Drug Rehabilitation, assistant director in a local shelter/clinic.
A psychologist is a dime a dozen, but you can choose a good psychologist by seeing who has worked through their issues. All people who get into the field of psychology do it for selfish reasons; all have issues to deal with and solve. Those who actually confront theirs and resolve them as best they can are the only ones who can really assist those of us who cannot help ourselves. There are those who never confront and resolve their personal issues, and thus are only repeating pedagogy and protocol.
And never really help.
---
Swimming in a thick pink goop on the hot sidewalk, a pair of Tommy Hilfiger jeans over his skinny ass; death would have welcomed this sorry addition to hell. Cisco and MD 2020 was a constant in this young man's life, but his greater purpose was for that sweet, sweet rock. The things he has done over the last five years; the near deaths, the homosexuality (sucking dick for crack was not funny nor fiction), giving up his closest friend in order to either score or to stay out of jail. Honor among thieves, maybe; honor among crackheads: Never.
Larry's dealers were few and far between now. Given the amount of money he has wasted away through his glass pipe, sucking on the glass dick; no dealer will touch this crackhead. Not enough money to score, not worth enough money to kill. A truly miserable existence, until Donnie came to town.
---
Don McCullough worked in a "wet" program. If a guy was okay to stay on a bed tonight, fine. If he has the Jones; into the wet tank they went. Don understood, and accepted that it was not legal, what they were doing at the Carter (what a joke, Jimmy and Ros) center, but some things had to be done to follow through and ensure the day by day well being of all these addicts. There were days the craving was so bad it was either just easier to give them what they wanted, or was more humane to quell their thirst. Don had a clue as what was actually happening.
Don didn't agree expressly with the mission of the wet drug clinic, but he went along with it. The social worker (never will be a psychologist, like Donnie) who ran the place was only interested in how many people she could pull off the street in a night, not in how many were actually cared for. This was not a priority of WestCare, to treat their clients, but rather to get through the mass, the absolute numbers on the street and get their funding.
This was not the way to do things.
---
Larry took the small baggie from Don.
"Now, you get out of here with that shit, Larry. I gave you enough to last a week. Go find your other spot and chill there while I help these other niggahs, ya dig?" Don stared intently into the young man's eyes.
"Sho' boss. You not gonna see mah fo' about at leas' three days! Tanks! You da' man, ya dig?" Larry could hardly contain his excitement at what his mentor had just done for him. A fat baggie full of crack would last him at least two or three days. More of the rock than he had seen at one time, and only this one man to thank. Oh, if this wasn't going to help him kick the habit, nothing would. This was it, time to hit it.
Back at the pad; an old construction site full of graffito and broken wood, Larry Welsh hit that glass dick again.
---
Donnie was a smart man. He watched the news. He paid attention to the news. He knew a noble cause when he saw one.
Don McCullough knew he hated what his government was becoming, saw how unclean it had become, how dirty its citizens were. Donnie could truly appreciate what those martyrs did in Olde London Towne, and understood even further what they used.
The acetone peroxide used to kill those unclean; the diseased.
The crystalline explosive, a danger to handle; worth it if you knew how to mix it.
His day is come.
---
Larry Welsh brought his old friend to his lips.
A sliver of yellow mellow was already in the bulb; Larry liked to twirl the junk around in his pipe before lighting it up. It reminded him of when he was new to the game, new and young. Playing in the sandbox they had called it.
The first time Larry snorted a rail of cocaine into his nostrils, be had made the usual mistake of blowing slightly on the mirror, and pushing the precious drug into disarray. Immediately he grabbed Sancho's ID card up, and began to realign the rail. Larry was lost in the shifting sands of his new playmate; moving it here, lining it up there: a true addict, rituals and everything.
One last twirl; the rock landed in the thin part of the bulb at the bottom. The Zippo lighter flicked on, and Larry watched the flame as it rose from his pant leg (he always did the trick) to his sweet release from this world into ignorance/oblivion.
Flash.
The explosion was sudden; the amount was small, but enough. The glass pipe (it used to be a canister for a vehicle deodorizer in a previous life) vaporized: microscopic shards of sand railed into Larry's eyes and face at thousands of feet per second, resulting in instant and permanent blindness. Slight fire ignited the dirty, greasy hair hanging down from his sallow, sloped head. Third degree burns were the order of the day; nothing do die from, and it was yet to be seen if anything would come of it besides the pain of an animal.
---
Donnie was pleased.
A rumor of a mad dealer circulated around the clinic<shelter/streets it was the same>and he knew it was benevolent.
The angel of the streets, the Jesus of the addicted. Soon everyone would be like he did on the inside. Dead. The envy of goths everywhere, the emos now had reason to cry.
User Reviews
Submitted by DrSeussman (user info) at 2006-07-20 20:49:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Righteous
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-07-08 16:32:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for people who don't get it
THIS WAS MY FIRST ROUND UBERMADNESS 2005 ENTRY.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/70907
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2006-07-07 22:26:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
plus eleventy
Submitted by consuelo212 (user info) at 2006-07-07 17:57:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-07-07 15:45:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG IF ONLY THAT ENDING HAD BEEN IN THE ORIGINAL
you know what, this could have been a double contest entry
One for DPRIME MADNESS and one for johnny x's (TBU)
IF ONLY YOU THOUGHT OF THAT YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THE TRUE LORD OF AWESOME SO EVEN IF YOU WIN I STILL AM MORE TEH AWESOME THAN YOU
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-07-07 15:42:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GOOD JOB DARKO
I LOVED THIS POST
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:49:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm im-fucking-pressed.
Submitted by Tracer0351 (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:39:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good plot, well writen.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:34:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:29:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Who wrote this, again? It's a good one.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Look on the bright side people, at least I didn't post abou space gremlins or some shit like that.
Submitted by Webered (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:27:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
That was decent. Needs a little more clarity.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:23:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good but the ending was shit. I am not a fan of Emos and Goths, but it was stupid. Shame. Fucking good idea though.
Submitted by BigD (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:22:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
It was a very difficualt read to be honest..it didn't flow smooth enough. Though i liked what you had to say about psychologists, that saves it from a -2
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:22:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:09:19 (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't read this.
---------------
Ok.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-07 12:09:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't read this.