Super Justice Fags, Episode Two REPOST (654 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: super_justice_fags
Rating: 1.3 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by LSD (View user info) at 2006-07-20 15:43:22 EDT
Cereal...err Serious Retribution (part one)-- http://www.ubersite.com/m/90632
See this for the history of "The Slonge" -- http://www.ubersite.com/m/90408
"You better hurry the fuck up, Donatello." Awesome Face urged Fungah.
"How 'bout you SHUT the fuck up. Everyone knows I'm the coolest one." Fungah retorted.
"You guys are fags." The BOSH man added, dressed as the blue power ranger.
LSD was in the washroom, jacking off.
In the washroom of a hippo...?
Awesome Face leaned out the window...of the hippo... and formed a gun shape with his fingers.
"BAM! BAM!" he yelled. "I got you!" He screamed, pointing at the Lucky Charms Leprechaun.
"Did not!"
"Yeah!"
"No!"
"Bitch... he's got a point..." Awesome Face mumbled, pulling his head back into the hippo.
"Whoa, where the fuck is this?" LSD said, suddenly amazed by the innards of the hippo.
The cereal-mobile increased speed and slowly escaped the sights of our heroes.
"OUR DRUGS!!!" the four brethren moaned, defeated.
The Super Justice Fags pulled over and parted ways with Fungah (he had a date with a rubber woman).
---
THE NEXT DAY AT THE SUPER JUSTICE CAVE!
"Man...What are we supposed to smoke, man?" LSD complained, although it was evident that his anger stemmed from the fact that earlier that morning, he had masturbated his dick into a stump after seeing a picture of some wite womenz licking popsicles.
The Bosh Man just lit up a cigarette and shook his head in disappointment.
"Being sober sucks" LSD sulked.
"We can still get drunk, right?" Awesome Face chimed hopefully.
"You're not allowed anywhere NEAR my booze until you atone for the last time you got drunk and filled out our superhero registration forms as belonging to 'The Super Justise Fags'"
Bosh took a hard drag on his cigarette, devoured the filter, and then shit it out at supersonic speeds, knocking over an empty can.
"We need some fucking drugs, man..." LSD groaned, sobering up from his trix high.
"Let's go to Fungah's place. He's always got some crack rocks laying around... or at least some E pills." Awesome Face Suggested.
"TO THE FAGGOTMOBILE!!!" Bosh shouted, striking a pose.
The faggotmobile was an amazing creature: Part rhino-car, part hippo, all faggot. They had gotten it tricked out somehow in the space of one day to be an even faster car than the hippo. If they ever saw their beloved trix again, they'd save them.
The Super Justice Fags piled in and sped off at TREMENDUS SPEADS to Fungah's house.
So then they ran over like fifty old ladies on their way to Fungah's, which earned them like 3200 points and two 1-ups, which were useful, cause LSD exploded because he ate five million and two pop rocks.
So then they crashed through Fungah's living room wall and found him sitting on his couch wearing a bra masturbating to a VCR infomercial.
"It's okay man, we've all been there..." LSD said, patting Fungah's back solemnly.
"I haven't." the BOSH man and Awesome Face replied in unison.
"We're here for drugs, man." LSD said, helping himself to some baking soda from Fungah's fridge. "And we need some better food than this shit." LSD said. "It's terrible!" He said, continuing to snack on the bitter powder. "Oh god I have the munchies though..."
"I don't have any drugs. Doctor Octopus was here and he stole all my shrooms!"
"What the fuck do you mean, 'I don't have any. Doctor Octopus was here and stole all my shrooms'?!" The BOSH man roared.
"Oh..."
"Well we can't just go straight into Doctor Octopus's lair...the only man brave enough to do that was my father, sonik da hegehog, and he died a long time ago..."
"Maybe we could just smack our sacks together until we get a headrush?" the BOSHman suggested.
Then a light bulb appeared over Awesome Face's head.
"I have an idea..."
---
MEANWHILE!
Earl Scruggs reached down in Doctor Octopus's lap and began to stroke his master.
"OH YES BABY DOLL! WOOHOOOOO!" Doctor Octopus moaned.
Suddenly, the door to the "interrogation room" burst open and in came...
The Slonge, the most dreaded mothafucka in all the land.
The Slonge raised his hand and began to squeeze at the air. He lifted his hand and Earl Scruggs went flying into the air, clutching his throat.
The Slonge slammed him to the ground, turning Earl Scruggs instantly into a pile of lemonade and bones. Cause he's got pussy ass lemonade for blood.
"Master! I have news! The Super Justice Fags are on their way to the supermarket to buy some bleach, vinegar, anti-freeze, and cough medicine!"
"But that could only mean one thing..." The Slonge hinted.
"Yes, my lord: They're going to try to cook some home-made meth."
"Engage the fleet of asspirates. We've got to stop them before the BOSH man powers up into his most powerful form..."
---
AT THE LOCAL SUPERSTORE!
"Where the fuck are the Bosh man and LSD?" Fungah asked, suddenly realizing half of the Super Justice Fags had disappeared.
"I heard they went to the dairy section to hit on that old lady. Either that or they're sucking on sausages in the meat isle." Awesome Face said, slightly distracted by the ingredients list on a jug of bleach. "This'll do, let's round them up and get home."
So LSD and the BOSH man took the old lady home and gave her a sound banging to while Awesome Face and Fungah cooked up some meth.
All of a sudden, The Slonge kicked down the door and he was all "bitch please!"
So Fungah was all "bring it, girl"
And the BOSH man was all "oh no you di'n't *snappity snap snap*"
"Awww yeeah..." a random black man said, flicking on a boombox full of tight beats.
"You guys...it's time." Fungah said quietly.
Then all four fags shouted in unison,
"SUPER JUSTICE FAGS UNITE!"
"What is the meaning of this faggotry?" The Slonge demanded.
"FORM OF..."
"Stop! You're becoming too powerful!" The Slonge screamed.
"A BLACK WOMAN!!!!!"
There was a brilliant flash of light, paint peeled off of cars for miles around, and the terrible roar of the explosion was heard even by Bart, the man who crammed his head so far up his ass he won a world record.
The Super Justice Fags, now in the form of "Black-chick-zord" crushed the Slonge with their collective big ass bootay.
The Super Justice Fags then went out to celebrate their victory and circle jerked on a newborn baby, not aware of the entire fleet of asspirates right behind them.
LSD, always a "quick finisher", as he preferred to be called, turned aro(UN)d first and froze, wide eyed.
Then Fungah and Awesome Face turned and froze.
The Bosh man, always a conversationalist, (B)eg(AN) bragging about the size of his tits. When he heard no response, he tried to coax one of the Fags into speaking, but all they could (M)uster was a Scooby-Doo-like "a mamamamama... a mamamamamama.....a mamama-fl(E)et of asspirates!"
The asspirates descended on our heroes to try and loot their (B)ooties, but the BOSH m(A)n tu(R)ned around jus(T) in time to shoot a ridiculously thick stream of lava-jizz at the asspirates, and they all died.
Then they all went to the bar and got drunk. Awesome Face went home with Fungah, The BOSH Man struck out when he tried to hit on a stray dog, and LSD went home and locked himself in his room. He masturbated all night, and all was well because they finally got wasted.
PROLOGUE: The next day they all pitched in for some sweet ganja and hot-boxed the BOSH donkey's colon. It was a GREAT bake.
AND SO, ONCE AGAIN, THE DAY IS SAVED THANKS TO...
User Reviews
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-07-21 07:18:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There are so many great quotes in this post that I can't possibly list all of them, so I won't bother.
But I will bother to give you this well-deserved +2.
WRITE MORE OF THESE DAMMIT!!!!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-07-20 21:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ban me Bart......
heh
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-20 21:15:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I forgot you are in this too. http://www.ubersite.com/m/90311
Submitted by Ishamael (user info) at 2006-07-20 19:59:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The davinci code aint so great, and this post was nothing special, to be hoenst.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2006-07-20 19:51:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This reminded me of The DaVinci Code.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-07-20 19:07:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
For SPT, it's decent.
For the other 6 days a week, it sucks nuts.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-20 18:17:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shit where are the reviews! This is gold. Mainly cause of me but its still gold!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-07-20 16:37:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!!
<BREATH>
HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-20 16:33:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Did I just read that one of you dorks was driving a "Fagmobile"?
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-20 16:28:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Im still going to write serial retribution part 2 though even though this was insanely funny.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-20 16:27:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
llolmdladgmolasdoflolololoslfmsaofdoosaldlolol
I liked the code you slipped in their.
Submitted by Samo (user info) at 2006-07-20 16:07:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Some crack rocks laying around...
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-07-20 15:57:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
This and WAY too many other posts today are FAR too good for a Thursday.
Submitted by HHH (user info) at 2006-07-20 15:47:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck that was supposed to go on episode one.
I CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT TODAY!!!
Submitted by HHH (user info) at 2006-07-20 15:47:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
EPISODE TWO NOW IN STORES!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/90741