Hirings and Firings - The View From the Top (23292 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: boredatwork
Rating: 1.34 on 61 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by nitty (View user info) at 2006-07-24 10:10:32 EDT
Business is good.
So good, in fact, that I've had to open the doors of the moderately sized printing company I sell for and bring in temporary labor. Last year my company output a little over $4 million in commercial offset print. I've recently been fortunate enough to land a client who's given my 2 jobs totalling $800K in the last month.
We're slammed.
As it always is in this industry, getting the jobs in the door is only half the battle. Getting them out is the other half. Both jobs require an extensive amount of handwork - kitpacking, collating, shrink wrap, banding...etc.
Thus the need for the temp labor.
Word spread, and I've begun 2 shifts. As this is my job, my customer, and my comission on the line, I'm keeping a close eye on the labor I've brought in. Any slippage in their production means dollars lost from my pocket.
So for the last 3 weeks, I've been able to observe a rather elementary sample market of the American workforce. Surely, this isn't representative of everywhere - but I bet it throws a pretty close dart. Below are examples of the extremes. The best, and the worst.
-nitty
User Reviews
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:33:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I see why this got showers of +2s, but not the b@w.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:04:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's nice when you can give a +2 and not have to debate whether or not it truly deserves it <3
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2007-03-23 14:19:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
seems like a farily decent representation of the diverse workforce...some good, some bad, some eager, some lazy...
Submitted by ThatsGodToYouBitches (user info) at 2007-01-14 10:13:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Your employee "Jarrod" is actually a rapper that was on Making The Band. Maybe next time you could put in the effort to choose pictures of people that haven't been on TV.
Excuse me while I go weep for actually knowing that :*(
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-10-01 04:11:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-07-28 15:58:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
Holy fuck, this made B@W?
Submitted by PenanceInACan (user info) at 2006-08-30 06:44:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yea capitalism.
Submitted by compEngineer0 (user info) at 2006-08-09 08:33:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not much...
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2006-08-09 07:45:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm trying to figure out how you have these photos of them. Are they real staff photos? Did you go around asking to take their photos especially for this? I mean, if our staff 'who's who' pages had pictures of us chewing our bling or standing moodily with a skateboard wrapped about our head I might actually make the effort to have a look.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-08-05 20:33:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
i was waiting for the funny bit
Submitted by Hypnoholic (user info) at 2006-08-05 15:30:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, don't let these meat heads get you down. Not EVERYTHING has to be funny to be entertaining. I enjoyed it. Though, being that I'm in a supervisory position I can relate.
Submitted by konohasaiyajin (user info) at 2006-08-05 14:47:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for some reason quite interesting. makes me realize how lazy i am at work.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-08-04 12:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fell asleep halfway through it again. Nearly lost my job.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2006-08-04 12:37:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
? I read it because it was on B@W, and I kept wating for the funny part.
Bart said awhile ago that he was trying to diversify the types of posts that made B@W. Maybe thats why he put his one up there.
Plus he seems to like to put "work" posts up.
What Bart needs to realize is that most of the people who check B@W are probably interested in it because they appreciate his sense of humor. If he switches it all up it might lose some appeal.
"Oh, I haven't checked www.boredatwork.com lately, it's been kinda bunk".
Submitted by ELG (user info) at 2006-08-04 00:00:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Damn, I hate you. Only one out of every twenty idiots we hire is a decent worker. I spend so much time chasing after people to get off the phone and do their work, I don't have time to do my own.
Submitted by ELG (user info) at 2006-08-03 23:58:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Damn, I hate you. Only one out of every twenty idiots we hire is a decent worker. I spend so much time chasing after people to do their work and get off the phone, I don't have time to do my own work.
Submitted by Molari (user info) at 2006-08-01 13:27:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't know why this was entertaining. But it was.
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2006-07-31 13:53:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We had a temp in my office last week...she came in on monday, called in sick tuesday, and went on break wed and never came back. She called on friday to tell us that we were boring and she wouldn't be back
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-07-30 09:19:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If I wanted to hear stories about Human Resources - I'd go along to our department, they at least have breasts.
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-07-29 09:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Congrats on B@W, it's my dream to make it there someday...
PS- were you on E when you wrote this? It seems like every person you talk about is "the hardest worker you've ever met"...
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-07-29 09:32:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this, but I was surprised at the B@W.
It was good, just not the usual fare.
-Dave
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-07-29 05:46:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Congrats on B&W!!!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:20:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Will's and Maria's were the only ones I laughed at.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-07-28 15:58:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Holy fuck, this made B@W?
Thanks for the vote Wardy.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-07-25 16:13:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:58:32 (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for Li'l Wayne
thats chopper from making the band2
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-07-25 16:05:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Im sorry but this sucked
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-07-25 15:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've hired temps who couldn't staple two pieces of paper together and stuff them in an inter-office envelope without fucking up in some impressive way.
Then again, this is California.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-07-25 10:14:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-07-24 13:21:54 (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe you could grow some brains and learn to spell 'permanently'
------------------------------------------------
Meh...you're hot. You don't need brains.
PS...I want you. Again! ;P
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-07-25 08:25:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great synopsis.
You know, you could hire Bart as your "social engineer."
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-07-24 22:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-24 15:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gimme a break...Shlongy work for Nitty?
Are you kidding? He'll be down in HH cleaning my toilets for room, board, booze and golf in three weeks.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-07-24 15:33:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm surprised you haven't put Shlongy on the payroll as Executive Vice-President In Charge Of Vermouth Acquisition yet...
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2006-07-24 14:35:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Suprisingly excellent.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-07-24 14:05:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Reminds me of a job that I had a long time ago...
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-07-24 13:21:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe you could grow some brains and learn to spell 'permanently'
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-07-24 13:15:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe you could grow some balls and hire some of them permenantly.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:58:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for Li'l Wayne
Submitted by krissi (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:30:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent work, as always, nitty.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Worth reading, just.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:27:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:43:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
This kept me entertained, but I can't figure out why.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-07-24 12:21:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LONG LIVE THE FUPA!!!
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:54:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's so much fun to pre-announce to the world someone's termination, isn't it?
You didn't hear this from me, but he's also stealing supplies.
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:47:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:43:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This kept me entertained, but I can't figure out why.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:39:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"will" made me think of warren from empire records.
Submitted by street-pirate (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:25:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a message for Dylan; Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
That is all.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:20:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Have you banged Alysia yet? I'm sure you probably already bent Samantha over the desk, ya sick fuck.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:11:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
great idea and done well
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-07-24 11:03:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:57:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
black
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:53:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha - you work at Popcopy!!!!
What's Dave Chapelle REALLY like???
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Har Har!
Hiring child labour on the sly and letting workaholics rag them selves rotton at the plant. Berty approves.
Submitted by STIXS (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:47:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree, get rid of the slacker, and, instead, hire Eddie's kids.
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:42:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I must say I always find your posts entertaining. Good stuff.
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:39:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:29:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
D'you have room for one more?
More of a management type position?
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:26:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As Always...
Submitted by NotSteve (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:19:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Praise Jesus I only have two employees.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:19:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i just submitted that shit.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:17:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Get rid of Jarrod, and the fat white bird. The others make up for them.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-07-24 10:12:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W.... and i'm not even done yet.