Dance Dance!! (441 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Rumpleforeskin (View user info) at 2006-07-25 11:50:23 EDT
"It is coming down to the last play of the season folks. Chamberlane High is on the 20 yard line with 7 seconds left."
Kelsey could hear the announcer over the PA system. He was in the backfield waiting to execute the final play of his career, his football career that is. You see, he was more passionate about another sport.
A sport that was going to not only take him to college, but also to the most remote areas of the world. He was a professional, a professional Dance Competitor.
His vivacious moves helped him in his football career as well. The two activities seemed to rely on similar components. With both you needed balance, strength, agility, and vision. It is no wonder that Kelsey was a highly sought after football talent, but he could not wear the pads forever.
Day after day Kelsey would submerge into his pool to practice his flexibility and movements. Each day he grew closer to a dream. You would think that he might be ridiculed and teased for wanting to dance. Actually it took on quite the opposite effect. With Kelsey's backing, Chamberlane High became one of the first high schools to have an elective dedicated to Competitive Dance.
Before anyone knew it, Footloose was the highest rented movie at the local Blockbuster. Next, Wal-Mart had to keep restocking the pantyhose and sweatband sections. It was absolutely amazing.
The school became so passionate about Competitive Dance that they started to allow for hour long breaks during the day to give their little competitors "dance freedom". You would hear great songs like "Thriller" while the kids synchronized in unison as if they were Michael Jackson's backup dancers.
Kelsey was granted a key to the city for his instrumental enlightenment to what dance could do for the soul. It was a release, it was liberating.
People who danced with Kelsey called him the "Little Pissclam" because he maneuvered on a stage like a vibrant creature of the sea.
Through the years the "little pissclam" would travel to Africa, Russia, China, and numerous other places displaying his talents. Thousands began to adore him as he frolicked on the stage gaining a following that would rival Riverdance.
There became an unfortunate turn of events, however. Kelsey's parents never told him that he was adopted. He actually was of Inuit decent and the story eventually came out when he gained popularity. He never got to know his real parents.
The story has it that they were still afloat on an iceberg, which continues to bounce back and forth between Alaska and the Kamchatka Peninsula. This tremendously hurt Kelsey to a point where he wanted to hang up his dancing shoes, or moccasins for that matter.
The movements in his routines became forced and the "little pissclam" took on the new name. They started to call him the "crooked sea cucumber". His rocking back and forth now left audiences nauseous and leaving the theatre.
His fame dwindled and he soon could not find a theatre to book him. Kelsey now works at the local Piggly Wiggly bagging groceries. His picture still hangs in the halls of Chamberlane High where he once was the towns beaming ray of light. Those pictures are now covered in dust and spitballs.
He is thinking of making a return to the stage. People are starting to wonder about his sanity. Nonetheless, there was a time when he was famed, a time he was loved, and a time he was revered. Now people try to burn his garage down. Who knows what might have happened to Kelsey if he never knew he was an illegitimate? We will never know. We will never know.
User Reviews
Submitted by karates_badboy (user info) at 2006-07-25 15:02:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
would have given you a -1 had you made this story realistic by having him get killed in a gay bashing after everyone found out he was a dancer. In real life teenage jocks dont just go ahead and stay quiet about things like this.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-07-25 13:05:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I didn't think this was horrible, just a bit choppy.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:52:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I though this was going to suck ass, and it did. Way to live down to my expectations...
Submitted by exposed (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:43:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ScroatMeal, I was confused from what you were saying. Please remove that Cock Harmonica and repeat. Muchas Gracias
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:42:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Great.
You just wasted 4 minutes of my time.
Thanks asshole.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:29:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was crap.
Submitted by JDL (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:15:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Crap.
Submitted by recall (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:06:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hmm.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-07-25 12:03:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would have nejoyed it more if you just wrote "little piss clam," everything else kind of sucked.