ADD - That's Where the Cabin Burned Down (1056 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.64 on 31 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Steve's House of St. Awesome (View user info) at 2006-07-28 16:44:34 EDT
Mr. Rogers prodded the ground with his foot. He didn't see the circling bird of doom above his head. No one did. No one knew what would happen that afternoon of sheer horror.
"What used to be here?"
Paulie turned his head, knocking his briefcase to the ground. The briefcase was in a tree above his head, you see. So when he turned his head WHAM down to the ground. The briefcase was filled with rocks and tiny gerbil skulls he'd grind into a fine powder and snort off a hooker's ass.
"That's where the cabin burned down. It caught on fire due to the atmospheric displacement of the October winter-burn. They never found the bodies. The bodies covered in liquid beans."
"What bodies? What beans?" Mr. Rogers removed his ballet shoes and started to massage his feet with a hot poker. He forgot that his socks were in the wash. Washing to death.
"I wonder what's for lunch today." Paulie was quite fat. Fat to death.
"Hey, let's go for lunch." Mr. Rogers hated ballet and wanted to eat seventeen types of cheese in one omelette for thirteen hours straight. What he didn't know was that the contest was closed and his dreams would never come true. :-(
"I'm attending the University of Ass-Kickery next fall." Paulie's father used to beat him with a dead seal. So dead it had started to catch on fire at random times for no reason.
"I had sex with your mom." Mr. Rogers wasn't serious. He couldn't have sex with anything. Not even Paulie's slut mom. Even a dead baby could have sex with Paulie's slut mom.
"My mom has a tiny tail." That's a lie and you know it.
"What's the deal with plywood?" Fuck plywood. I'm sick of its shit. Always lying around, not building itself into a new cabin. Or a roller coaster.
"Have you ever seen the brain of a kitten?" I have. It blew my mind.
"No, can't say I have." Mr. Rogers red blue green rainbow awesome.
"Really?" Said the ghost.
BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW THERE WAS A GHOST, DID YOU???
User Reviews
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-12 13:21:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ghost
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-08-12 13:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2006-07-30 16:35:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Stevie, you can't just rest on pretty....
you have to be pretty to do that!! hahaha
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-07-29 15:39:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Dexter-Brown (user info) at 2006-07-29 05:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What - IS - the deal with plywood anyway?
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-07-29 01:58:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:21:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
I got distracted by this awesome bottle of water.
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A bottle of water, where. I need to see this. Is it shiny? Is it cold. Can I kill it.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-07-29 01:28:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
um
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-07-29 00:53:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-07-28 19:25:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:44:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You scare me with your brilliance.
Submitted by gonefiguring (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:26:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like this ADD thing.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:24:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 2
Im totally not even reading any of these. I didn't even read mine.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:21:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Im totally not even reading any of these. I didn't even read mine.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:21:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I got distracted by this awesome bottle of water.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why didn't you choose "The 'A' Stands For 'Awesome'" for your ADD post?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:10:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am the biggest sucker ever
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:08:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just bought $5 worth of happiness.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"One dollar for eternal happiness? I'd be happier with the dollar."
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:02:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Am I the only one who is debating spending 5 bucks to buy happiness?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 17:00:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAH!
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:58:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY!
I SEE IT NOW!!!!
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:58:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
All I see is Jason Pollock.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
SOME ONE UNCLOG MY TUBES!!!!
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:55:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:52:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The internet is a series of tubes, and your candain tubes are probably full of hockey and beer right now.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:51:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bored at Work
Bored at Work
A work of Bart since 1998
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"Work is the scourge of the drinking classes."
-- Oscar Wilde
Ten Things To Do When You're Pulled Over By A Cop Ü
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Buy Some Happiness
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:50:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I put all my thought into the post and had nothing left for the filename.
AND IT'S NOT ON B@W.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:49:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
filename
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:49:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY HAVEN'T YOU LABELED YOUR NEWEST B@W POST YET!?!?!
Submitted by foodman (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:48:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I did not know there was a ghost...Awesome twist.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-07-28 16:46:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nicely done mr. st. awesome