How I got on the MVM (SPT) (451 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: comedy
Rating: -0.4 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Maltese (View user info) at 2006-08-03 13:35:06 EDT
It all started when I was at this totally BOSH cafeteria. I saw some dude named Jared talking to a girl named Clara so I went over and she called me Steven, so I ran into the bathroom and licked a clitoris ring until I came too soon. Then I got on my Blackberry and sucked an elephant cock horse until I was raped by an enraged baboon in a nipple factory while Clara stuck her finger in my lub-lub so I stuck mine in her UH OH!!?!??!!?!!?shiftone!!1!
All of the sudden, I kicked Earl Scruggs in the nutsac, stole his car, ran over a hundred British soldiers, and robbed a casino of a hundred and sixty million pesos. So then I went to the store and rented Gangbangs of New York and My Big Fat Greek Whore, which I masturbated to furiously while getting monkey-stomped by a badass Australian cow named Vinny who told me I was a good girl. Then I ran into a hobo named Tubgirl and dove head-first into his spewing anus and licked it clean while he told me that Coca-Cola was originally clean, among other totally useless facts, and then I grabbed Dr. Seuss after I saw him assrape a puppy so I sodomized his balls with an orange.
Then the Oil and Gas Industry came and made me get raped by a Dyson after Bill Brasky pushed me off a ladder. So then I worked in retail security until I got enough money to buy a totally fucking awesome lightsaber, but before that they told me to contact R. Kelly for more info. This pissed me off, so I punched a six-year-old in the face until I went to hell, in which Satan's 2-year-old daughter tried to kill me, but I won by killing her with my ass after eating some badass macaroni. I'm talking some FUCKING SERIOUS macaroni here, people.
Then I bought some KY Jelly and a cucumber so I dated a cripple teenage girl and ate her out in my Spider-Man costume until she became "that guy" and I saw his fart. So I exacted revenge on him with a rubber band that I used to tie his balls together while I moved to Canada with idiots who discussed complex subjects, so I fingered their assholes while the Kool-Aid Man gave me "the look" again.
This, my friends, is why nature is fucked up.
I am also not a hitwhore (sex fuck porn Lindsay Lohan ultimate ms paint GO BEARS WOO).
If you have any comments or questions, feel free to suck my cawk.
FSR! BACK UP IN YO ASS
STEP OFF DA FLAG OR YOU'LL CATCH A ROCKET BLAST
MAG IN HAND I'LL BE BLASTIN' YO MAN,
PUSH HIS WIG BACK WHILE I'M MAKIN' A DICK SCAN
YOU SIR HAVE THE GHEY AIDS AND THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE IN ALL THE LAND AND, WELL, I WOULD LET YOU HAVE YOUR WAY WITH ME IF YOU WANTED. HONK.
THAT IS ALL.
User Reviews
Submitted by blackeyedbitch (user info) at 2007-01-25 14:02:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-10-11 19:52:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
balteze, i <3 u
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-08-05 00:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-05 00:18:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
if i give you a +2 do you give me a +2?
+2 for the pic never seen so much fat
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Yes. Check your five most recent posts.
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-05 00:18:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
if i give you a +2 do you give me a +2?
+2 for the pic never seen so much fat
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-05 00:17:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck?
Submitted by eppliks (user info) at 2006-08-05 00:07:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Faggot kid.
Submitted by OldManTeething (user info) at 2006-08-04 17:17:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Plint (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:00:17 (#)
Ranking: -2
http://members.on.nimp.org/?u=timecop
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I fucking hate you.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:24:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 Sphagnum's alter.
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:16:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Someone is trying WAYYYYY too hard to be like LSD.
This sucked. Period.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:13:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
flubber mc flubberson flubbed da flub
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:06:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Plint (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:00:17 (#)
Ranking: -2
http://members.on.nimp.org/?u=timecop
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You. Mother. Fucker.
Submitted by Plint (user info) at 2006-08-03 14:00:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://members.on.nimp.org/?u=timecop
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-08-03 13:51:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm high as shit on speed
plus twos for all
too bad this was complete shit
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-08-03 13:48:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-08-03 13:39:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Seriously, more and more posts look like the "author" just opened the dictionary to random pages and wrote down the first word they saw.
At least put SOME effort into it people.
Christ.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-08-03 13:36:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Random done well is amusing.
This was not.