FUCK Average_Dan (2072 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.87 on 75 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <thedarknessfromabove.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-08-06 23:15:14 EDT
Congratulations average_dan, you managed to join the mainstream sheep who decide to go against me, although not in an intelectual way - you chose to do it in a childish gay way.
I hope everyone else has as much fun with this email that I did, you really made me laugh.
fucking puppet.
User Reviews
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2006-10-11 06:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-08-30 21:11:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-21 06:28:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
We know you like cock, shitty alter.
I mean, you sell your man-ass on the street for crack, so of COURSE you like cock.
Submitted by paint_it_black (user info) at 2006-08-21 04:55:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hey average-dan its meant to be i like cock
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-14 00:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm glad we got that settled ILS.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-12 20:08:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-08 03:59:41 (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I also used "Know" instead of "no", but hell, I'm pretty buzzed, and my caps lock is fucked, hence mussing your name.
My bad man, my bad.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It's ok.
Submitted by Defect (user info) at 2006-08-09 21:55:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I almost got through the first sentence. Almost.
Submitted by paint_it_black (user info) at 2006-08-09 21:42:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How about FUCK YOU?
Submitted by wingester1 (user info) at 2006-08-09 02:35:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
how about fuck you?
Submitted by DirtyDoubleEntendre (user info) at 2006-08-09 00:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Please print that email so that you can use it to give yourself billions of tiny paper cuts.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-08 21:18:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
AHAHHAHAHAA
If I knew this cunt was going to post this on Uber, I would have made it worth while, maybe I'll try it again.
But probably not.
Much to the relief of Uberers everywhere.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-08-08 18:43:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Puppets?
Don't worry about me, I made up my own mind. You've given plenty of evidence in each post to prove what a disgusting person you are.
Also, you can't post your email and be suprised when people send you stuff.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-08-08 17:37:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-07 05:25:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
If this is an alter, it is SHOOTING up the charts.
It's got to be Top 5 alters of all time, maybe Top 3.
-------
Jay, this alter already fucked up and blew it by posting an old pic off Uber.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-08-08 14:46:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
wtf is this shit?
this has to be the worst alter ever...
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-08 03:59:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I also used "Know" instead of "no", but hell, I'm pretty buzzed, and my caps lock is fucked, hence mussing your name.
My bad man, my bad.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-08 02:55:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-08 02:43:16 (#)
Ranking: -1
ILikeSteak,
This isn't me you dolt. You were talking to me, know?
Forensic,
I just saw the review and I chortled until I died. Then I was born again, but not in the biblical way as much as the physical way, which is much better i think
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. You fucked up my name cuntbag.
2. You didn't get the joke.
3. Somewhere there's a loud "woosh" noise that exists just for you.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-08 02:43:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
ILikeSteak,
This isn't me you dolt. You were talking to me, know?
Forensic,
I just saw the review and I chortled until I died. Then I was born again, but not in the biblical way as much as the physical way, which is much better i think
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-08-07 23:47:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Way to stick it to the man.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-07 19:59:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-08-07 19:47:02 (#)
Ranking: -1
Eventually, I'll see his eyes...
====
I highly reccommend it!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-08-07 19:47:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Eventually, I'll see his eyes...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:31:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:22:42 (#)
Ranking: -2
Average_Dan is a kind, encouraging man with eyes I could get lost in,
---------------
I got lost in his eyes once. I mean, I thought I knew where I was going, but then I got all turned around..like in those funhouse things with the mirrors and shit? And I realized that I was totally fucked and should have stayed in one place for the rescuers to find me. I'm lucky I had some granola with me 'cause that would have been a hell of a way to go. The only reason I even got out was because I could see the light coming in through his ears.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-07 17:07:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Average_Dan, you've crushed another "I made another emo kid cry." statement. Thanks for killing that dream. It'd be a +2 for the awesome joke, but you still posted shitty emo poetry.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-08-07 16:41:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Bi-curious?
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-08-07 16:29:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-08-07 16:09:57 (#)
Ranking: 0
I hate it when things like this happen and then later I never make it back to see whose alter it turned out to be.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Me too.
I miss so much these days as I have better things to do. I'm not bored every day now, just curious once a week or so.
But I keep missing whats going on.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-08-07 16:09:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hate it when things like this happen and then later I never make it back to see whose alter it turned out to be.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-08-07 15:58:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-01-16 11:17:38 (#)
Ranking: -2
Alter, alter, posting shite,
Yay, another uber fight;
Why the effort? Why time spent
Being a douchebag on the 'net?
In what room of parents' house
Do you reside with cat or mouse?
Of what age? Near 44?
Have you e'en touched girls before?
And why fear the showers, you?
Soap and suds and shampoo, too?
Clean that fupa, wash that mop,
Maybe then you'll get a job.
When your dad shot deep inside
Your mother's womb, she should have lied
And told him not a sperm hit true,
Then used coat hangers to kill you.
Alter, alter understand
You should not have roamed this land
Or lived to see these skies of blue.
A parting gift: a minus two.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-08-07 15:49:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
it's nothing a bullet to the head couldn't fix, though, so there's a bright side...
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-08-07 15:49:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
We're not sheep rallying against you. It's really not us. I'm sorry to break it to you, but it's you. You just suck.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-08-07 15:47:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Dan, you can get girls in bed without having to resort to this.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-07 15:39:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I liked it, forensic...
I liked it.
RAWRRR
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-08-07 14:53:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I can't believe Dan hasn't remarked about my remark about his balls. You know, being mighty and fierce.
I figured he'd like that.
weep
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-07 14:52:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This needed far, far more gay bashing.
And a sprinkle of teh Rape.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-08-07 13:57:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I can not support your bashing of A_D, you dickwad.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:52:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Stupid.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:43:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
no more please.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:32:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love heat posts about Average_Dan
Will someone please come out and fess up to whose alter this is?
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:31:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I prefered the embarrassingly crap poetry posts myself..
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:22:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You both sound gay.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:18:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hahahahahahahahaha
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-08-07 11:10:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Does this mean that Average_Dan is having schizo issues?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:57:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can I make fuck with your mouth?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:43:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-07 05:25:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
If this is an alter, it is SHOOTING up the charts.
It's got to be Top 5 alters of all time, maybe Top 3. """
gayest comment ever
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:38:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-08-07 00:40:29 (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't fuck with TeH A_D, little Alter...
I'll slice off your imaginary vagina with an x-acto blade, fry it in a pan with some butter and garlic salt, then serve it to you on a bed of cajun rice. I'll sit back and watch as you are forced to consume your pretend womanly parts, the blood leaking from between your legs where I've stuffed a gasoline soaked rag. Once you've finished in the joys of self-cannibalization, I may or may not light up that rag in blazing victory, forever rendering your fictional cunt a place of TRUE darkness...
------------------
Dude. Wow, seriously....THAT'S alotta hate there.
PS: Yes, "Shari", we all hate you.
Kindly fuck off.
Regards,
Foolproof
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:35:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
eh.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:24:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OH yeah, and you spelled "ghey" wrong you fucking bitch.
I'm sure everyone else had plenty of fun with this you gullible fucking tool. You ever get those pieces of mail that said you have already won $1,000,000? WELL THIS IS THE SAME THING EXCEPT YOU DON'T EVEN GET GOOD MAGAZINES FOR WASTING YOUR TIME. YOU JUST GET A SHITTY MAG FULL OF POETRY FROM SHIT FUCKERS LIKE YOURSELF.
In the event that this is an alter (which is becoming more apparent everyday), please ignore the above paragraph.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-08-07 10:11:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHHAHAHA,
I got you all bitches, this is my alter and I tell hew what to do and how to act!
You are all my flock of sheep and I will control your direction with my crook rod.
And I'm not talking about my peenar.
Maybe I am.
In any case, this is the most fun I could ever have without leaving the office. Well, unless you count that time that we laid out a line of glossy photopaper and poured Dawn and a five gallon water cooler tank on top of it for an impromptu slip and slide. That was a little better. But involved less sheep.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-08-07 08:23:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Im bored of this now, are you bored of this now?
Im bored and hungry
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-07 07:06:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Method, ???
I'm just saying, if this is an alter, it's a REALLY good alter.
If it's a real person...
Well...
Wow. That's a scary thought I don't want to get into.
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2006-08-07 07:01:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
As opposed to the alternative and emo sheep, fighting against the machine to retain their individuality for the good of humanity! those widdle fwuffy lumpkins!!!!
Shit, if you're going to use the word "intellectual," at least spell it right, I don't care if you are an alter. And now I am taken by a strange urge to go read Average_Dan's posts...
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-08-07 06:42:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you guys are incredibly gullible idiots
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-07 05:25:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If this is an alter, it is SHOOTING up the charts.
It's got to be Top 5 alters of all time, maybe Top 3.
Submitted by fun_with_needles (user info) at 2006-08-07 04:45:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Okay so...next.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-08-07 04:04:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This has taken a turn for the worse and is now boring.
Shame really because it was great fun while it lasted.
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-07 02:15:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Arent you a sheep for following all the sheep that dont want to be a conformist and "sheep"
O the hypocrisy
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-07 02:11:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
your poetry dose suck.
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-07 02:10:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
And one for giving me one
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2006-08-07 02:09:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Here is a -2 for not being smart
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-08-07 02:01:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Ok, definitely an alter! I hate to give you alter-creatin' pussies attention but.....
why mess with A_D?!
Lo, for his balls are mighty and fierce and have laid waste many a late-adolescent belligerent twat's battlements and ramparts.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-07 01:17:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
We all know it's an alter, but since when is it not fun to throw rocks at them. It could also be a joke account. I've had my suspicions, but I like to think that somewhere, I've made another emo kid cry.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-08-07 00:40:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't fuck with TeH A_D, little Alter...
I'll slice off your imaginary vagina with an x-acto blade, fry it in a pan with some butter and garlic salt, then serve it to you on a bed of cajun rice. I'll sit back and watch as you are forced to consume your pretend womanly parts, the blood leaking from between your legs where I've stuffed a gasoline soaked rag. Once you've finished in the joys of self-cannibalization, I may or may not light up that rag in blazing victory, forever rendering your fictional cunt a place of TRUE darkness...
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-08-07 00:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Die of herpes, cumwhore.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-08-07 00:15:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
JUST BECAUSE A_D's LAST CAMWHORE IS EERILY THE SAME STYLE AS THIS TEENY-BOPPER'S DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S HIS ALTER.
Dan, if this is you, I swear..
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:47:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:39:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
ok, idiots, heres a hint for you. this is clearly an alter. i was taken in at first, but the same drivel each post, and the blatantly gay camwhores has woken me up. look at that spelling of 'intellectual'. its even more contrived than the fat tony 'yous'.
some unoriginal genius is giggling at your every indignant response.
==========
WHO GIVES A FUCK
ITS SOMETHING TO DO
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:39:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ok, idiots, heres a hint for you. this is clearly an alter. i was taken in at first, but the same drivel each post, and the blatantly gay camwhores has woken me up. look at that spelling of 'intellectual'. its even more contrived than the fat tony 'yous'.
some unoriginal genius is giggling at your every indignant response.
Submitted by toucansam (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:39:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i wonder how long until this one gets on most heated.....
this makes me suspicious that this is dan's alter....hm.....
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:32:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
somebody make a hate post about me. I want to know that I inspire strong emotions in at least one of you.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:31:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:22:42 (#)
Ranking: -2
Average_Dan is a kind, encouraging man with eyes I could get lost in,
---------------
I got lost in his eyes once. I mean, I thought I knew where I was going, but then I got all turned around..like in those funhouse things with the mirrors and shit? And I realized that I was totally fucked and should have stayed in one place for the rescuers to find me. I'm lucky I had some granola with me 'cause that would have been a hell of a way to go. The only reason I even got out was because I could see the light coming in through his ears.
Submitted by stok (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:28:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:25:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh. I thought this post was an offer.
________
plus 2 for that
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:25:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh. I thought this post was an offer.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:25:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait, how come Bart let you have an alter, and he still hasn't let me have one?
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:23:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahaha
This +2 is for you Dan.
I bet this is your alter isn't it?
Submitted by stok (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:23:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
show us your front
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Average_Dan is a kind, encouraging man with eyes I could get lost in, who was clearly only trying to help you by lending some emotional support on Ubersite..possibly in the hopes that you would stop cutting. You are a heartless cunt who has now posted his personal info for all to see.
Not that we don't all have it anyway.
You should appreciate.. HEY WAIT,WHAT THE FUCK, AVERAGE_DAN, YOU NEVER GAVE ME NO CONGRATULATIONS ON MY SUCCESS AFTER ALL WE'VE BEEN THROUGH!!11
p.s., "Shari"- everybody hates you.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You'll need this later.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:20:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Someone can't tell sarcasm when they see it. I also love that you keep your email address as your name when you post. Expect porn from me soon.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-08-06 23:19:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
One who cannot spell intellectual isn't one. . .