The chronicles of my Ass (537 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.4 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by RPharazon (View user info) at 2006-08-14 19:41:44 EDT
I think My Ass hates my guts. Weird choice of words, I guess.
It all started a bit under a half a year ago. My Ass decided that a part of it would start hurting. It's in the crack, but only a bit below the waistline.
Now, this is all fine and dandy, since the hurt was only minor, and only every week, but eventually it started hurting quite a bit. Enough so by the end of last month, I had a bit of trouble sitting down. The pain went down a bit, and I was back and running around.
But no, My Ass realized that I was making a resistance towards it. It retaliated by telling my guts to digest only a portion of what they gained. This led to diarrhea. I wiped well, but this did not defend against the dreaded WET FARTS.
2 days ago, my pants started staining. Not skid marks, but stains. My Ass made it all so much the better by confusing me with weird-colored... outcomes. This includes green, brown, reddish-brown, light brown and every single color of the Brown rainbow. I'm worried now because I think it might have some blood content in it. I don't exactly want to go to a doctor because I don't want to make him (or an unlucky her) barf, making the pants situation all much the worse.
In conclusion, cocks.
Also, first post. Weird.
User Reviews
Submitted by Defect (user info) at 2006-08-15 08:54:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know why I like this post.
Submitted by The_Mighty_Badger (user info) at 2006-08-15 07:47:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha! i can only imagine what you must look like. this was hilariously lame.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-08-15 07:07:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is awful. You're awful. How do you get out of bed in the morning?
Submitted by Sockster (user info) at 2006-08-15 06:53:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-08-15 04:28:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for choosing a tough opening subject. The subject of shit is always a hard one to pull off: http://www.ubersite.com/m/91768
Submitted by fun_with_needles (user info) at 2006-08-15 01:28:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Welcome
Submitted by toucansam (user info) at 2006-08-14 23:25:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
*sigh*
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-08-14 23:22:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
some day we shall all be healed
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-08-14 22:55:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Meh
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-08-14 22:05:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Welcome to Uber. Normally I would -2 this but you started off with shit.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:46:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck you.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:30:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
A negative deuce for a post about negative deucing.
*begin jingle*
What sits in pants
cologne has no chance
and makes a squishity sound
A stink, a stink!
A marvelous thing!
Ev'ryone knows, it's Mud-butt!
It's Mud-butt! It's Mud-butt!
For fun let your care be gone,
It's fun for a Pharazon,
It's fun for a Pharazon!
Submitted by RPharazon (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:27:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Gee, thanks.
Also, believable fiction FTW.
Thanks for caring though.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:25:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
AUTO 1ST POST -2 MOTHER FUCKER
Submitted by Snalty (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:14:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
-1 for discussing the color of your excrement.
But you really should go to a doctor. They've all seen worse, trust me.
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2006-08-14 20:10:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:54:55 (#)
Ranking: -2
Why the hell is this positive? It's about shit-stains
Submitted by OfficeZombie (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:55:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
How fat are you?
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:54:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why the hell is this positive? It's about shit-stains
Submitted by Cracked_out_cali (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:52:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
mmmm....Mud-Butt
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:51:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
shitty.
Submitted by stok (user info) at 2006-08-14 19:49:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
last night i had the biggest shit attack ever, right in the middle of trying to watch the jerky boys movie. even though this post is a lie, i empathise.