so I wrote a metal song...and it's teh suxxorz omg !!!11! (519 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.46 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by RockDocc (View user info) at 2006-08-22 10:32:26 EDT
Messianic complex
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you're beginning to bore me
you talk of saving the world
when the biggest problem is yourself
take what you will
and learn the truth
you can do nothing sitting on your ass
you want to save the world
you can't save yourself
dip into your personal hell
for relief and comfort
you'll get none here.
you scream and cry
and noone listens
you bitch and moan
we've grown tired of inaction
take what you will
and learn the truth
you can do nothing
sitting on your ass
you want to save the world
you can't even save yourself
you want to save my life
take care of your own
you're boring me
crying about injustice
bitching about life
you're boring me
save yourself
User Reviews
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-08-22 21:01:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-22 20:16:32 (#)
Ranking: -1
How again is this metal?
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fine, fine, FINE! I don't know how to write a good metal song. Or hell, write a metal song, PERIOD! My first foray into the lyrical side of my obsession has been turned into the laughingstock of uber.
which is a good reason for why I posted it. I wanted to get the most cynical and hateful comments one could muster about my lyrical writing abilities, and I wasn't dissapointed. Now that I know that I'm not too good at it, I wouldn't mind some help, even a couple ideas couldn't hurt. i know there's a few of you on here who are somewhat given to helping out a fellow uberite when it comes to their writing abilities, and it's to these people I appeal to. In the past, everything that I've ever written as "poetry" or lyrics, has never had a rhyme scheme. I instead chose to repeat certain stanzas in certain places, in order to give the piece a better "rhythm" to it, instead of a rhyme. This particular piece was actually, well to my woman at least, slipknotish. Which was fine by me, not exactly the mood I was going for, but if one were to use the piece in that context, I think it would work a bit better.
I dunno, like I've stated below, I'm usually a riff writer, the hardest part for me, is putting words to notes and chords. I can create a feeling with my guitar, I can create a mood, and I can give a setting, but I usually depend on a good singer to deliver in words what the music is saying. I don't like to accompany a singer, I prefer for the singer to accompany me, using lyrics as a sort of guide to the music I'm playing.
so, thanks for the comments, all of them, and I'll work on some other stuff and post it again. I would prefer the hateful comments of a faceless uberites, then an actual audience when I'm on stage.
-rockdocc
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-08-22 20:16:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
How again is this metal?
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-08-22 20:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if you write a riff to it, post it and I'll +2 it. I give you my permission and encouragement
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-08-22 20:00:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92133
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:41:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dude, this really did suck.
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shut up, you think I don't know that?
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then what business do you have fighting back against these people?
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I'm camping on my post, standard uber procedure
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dude, it's over, this was your metal waterloo, the crossing of your thrash rubicon, dude, they sank the fucking death metal battleship. GAME OVER MAN! GAME OVER!
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maybe if I don't move, they won't see me
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this isn't fucking Jurassic Park you stupid kike!
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did you just call me a kike?!
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yeah, what the fuck you gonna do about it?
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dude, you're my other personality..
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oh yeah, sorry.
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naw, it's cool.
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stupid kike.
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:37:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by dr_weazel (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:35:25 (#)
Ranking: -2
Metal sucks.
=======================
your mom.....sucks.....at metal.
yeah, take that, bitch!
Submitted by dr_weazel (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:35:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Metal sucks.
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:30:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I'll just stick to being a riff writer. Words...maybe later, right now I need to focus on learning the rest of the fret board. I'm up to E...that's some improvement over nothing at all...right?
Submitted by rockdocc (user info) at 2006-08-22 19:24:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:34:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
I never realized just how emo metal really is
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and just what the fuck is emo about it, you pathetically tiny dicked hemaphrodite?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-08-22 11:20:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
A Reading From the Book of Kickass Fake Rock Songs: 2006-08-11 17:57:07
"I'm gonna fuck you till you love me"
I'm restless for your breastses
And I'm not to be denied
I'm plumpin for some bumpin
And my target is your hide
You'll find that I'm the garlic
To your pasta sauce delight
But I won't make you stinky
My white gravy tastes just right
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
Fuck you
Your steezy is so pleasey
That I think I shit my pants
I long to kill your dueling knight
With my pink fleshy lance
No fakin', take my bacon
Catch my gristle in your pud
I'll hunt you down like Rambo
Bag and tag you for first blood
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
I'm gonna fuck you till you love me
Fuck you
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-08-22 11:01:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yeeesh.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:58:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I never negative rate music.
But this isn't music.
I don't know what this is.
Just take this instead of me continuing on.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:57:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't quit your day job...assuming you could actually get one.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:53:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:52:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If I did anything but -2 this heap of dung then I'd be doing myself and everyone else who digs hard music a severe disservice.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:48:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Brahman complex
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you're beginning to bore me
you talk of saving yourself
when the biggest problem is marriage
i'll take what i want
you'll learn the truth
you can do nothing saving your virgin ass
you want to save yourself
you can't save yourself
I'll dip into your vaginal well
for relief and comfort
you'll find it rocks
i cream your thighs
babies on your legs
now it's time for anal
i want some satisfaction
i'll take you at will
you'll learn the truth
that it's pointless
saving your virgin ass
you want to save yourself
you shouldn't want to save yourself
you want to be my wife,
you virginal Pakistani waif?
you're boring me
crying about marriage laws
bitching about tradition
and a dowry of goats and curry
you're boring me
get me another maiden from the Punjab, father
one that plays the Ass Bass and the electric Quim
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:41:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Weak
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:40:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:38:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
My love for you is like a truck, Berserker
Would you like some making fuck, Berserker
My love for you is like a rock, Berserker
The Berserker is just so obscene
Likes evil people you know what I mean
He takes your soul and then just rips you apart
He'll steal your heart
Would you like to smoke some pot, Berserker
My love for you is ticking clock, Berserker
Would you like to suck my cock, Berserker
Would you like some making fuck, Berserker
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:36:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
*devil horns*
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-08-22 10:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I never realized just how emo metal really is