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Attention Ubersite - &- ADDMadness, a special message for Spencer, apollo et al. (724 hits)

Category: Romance
Labels: crap

Rating: 0.95 on 36 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by scourge - now taking requests (View user info) at 2006-09-01 15:26:09 EDT


Good Friday my dearest Uber,

I haven't posted since last month and I know you all have missed me horribly. Well, here I am. Please feel free to lavish praise on me before you see your way out of this. Who knows? I may not post again until next month...and then where would you be? Lost and scared is where.



Here is the type of praise that I have grown accustomed to having lavished upon me:

"Scourge - someone who is perfect in every way."

As seen here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/91314

That Jonny, he's a real card isn't he folks?




AND LOOK, even noobs recognize my wondrous ways:

"..scourge

i'm starting to become a better person, and it's not so bad

Maybe trying to compensate for some bad karma of the past? Apparently he is the best author/person in the entire universe."

As seen here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/92528

This guy will be getting +2s for life from me. Just like everyone else.





Hell, feel free to use one of their assessments of me in a review if you'd like. They both summed it up pretty well.

Enough of that, you all know how to kiss ass well enough without my help. Let's move to the next item on the agenda.





As many of you unwashed non-American heathens are probably unaware, due to your lack of freedom and superpower status, I will have to provide this public service announcement.

You will likely see very few of us until Tuesday.

Americans celebrate a very special holiday in September...no not a remembrance of that whole building/airplane/boom boom business...who cares about all that when there is McDonalds to buy and gas to guzzle? I'm talking of course about Labor Day!!! (Get it, Labor Day? Hahaha fat lazy Americans.)

We celebrate the glories of the working life at this glorious arbitrarily chosen time of year by not working.

We also make sure to do it on a Monday so we can all feel like we get a mini 'naughty' bonus vacation from the tedious, mind numbing toil done behind ugly pressed wood desks. (My desk is actually made of cherry, but I'm better than most other people and deserve something a bit finer. See examples offered above for further proof. )

The long and short of this is that you odd 'foreigner' types will have this place to yourselves come Monday.

Please feel free to talk about whatever you'd like.

Tea
The Queen
Moose (if you're one of our Canadian brethren)
Poisonous things (for the Australians of course)
Crumpets
Football
Even apartheid (this is also known as the phuzzygish special)

No worries and guilt free!!! We won't be here to mock your strange and savage ways.

Because we'll be driving our Hummers to WalMarts and McDonalds all day long, just thinking about how cool and free we are. We'll be singing the 'I Love Labor' song while we pull the lever on our La-Z-Boys. It rocks, no doubt about it.

We're #1. It's true.

So anyway, have at it while we're gone suckers.



EXTRA SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT SUCK IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE:

If the above sentence applies to you, click here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/92455#2124470 then come back here.

If you are of a mind with young Master Spencer, please indicate to me here in a review if you'd be interested in participating.

If enough of you sign up we'll make a go out of this.

I don't see this stepping on anyone elses toes. I plan to participate in UMIV myself in addition to this. If enough people are interested, we'll build a bracket and hack away at each other until someone wins the fucking thing.

I'm thinking single elimination. And quick turnaround on rounds. Three or four days. This time we'll even take the word limit seriously, and establish a size limit if someone wants post an image as their entry.

I'll check back here over the weekend and see what the response is like.


I probably won't review though. That's Labor.


labor is for slaves.  pass me a mint julep..JPG (24 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-05-18 12:52:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-10-31 22:29:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

I've had it up to here with your shennanigans, I'm going through and -2ing ALL of your posts!

Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-27 14:46:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I LOVE MYSELF!!

SIGNED,

SCOURGEY

Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-27 13:44:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-27 13:39:58 (#)
Ranking: -2

http://www.ubersite.com/m/95020#2202073

banning attempt

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-06 13:32:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I FORGOT I EVER POSTED THIS.

HAHA. SORRY GUYS.

Submitted by The_Mighty_Badger (user info) at 2006-09-04 04:35:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

I'll have at it whenever I please.

Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-03 16:42:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Man, four day weekends sure do fuck the water right off of a duck.

Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2006-09-02 23:43:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

I'll do it. Obviously.

Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2006-09-02 11:54:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Two of my highest rated posts were because of ADD so you can count me in for sure.

Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-02 01:08:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i am really jealous wifey. tell me how they are.

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-02 00:55:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i like add i just ate a bucket of mussels and some creme brulee and lots of vodka and tomorrow i'm going to a bbq then a rock n roll show ghola is jealous and im going to the phillies game on monday and i don't know when im gonna get any sleep this weekend my friend says he thinks we should sleep together and i just don't know but he is very tall and i like tall and hes funny too i miss deadwood already what a fantastic show wtf nothing good is on tv anymore you know what i mean i need some iced tea and a nap i think i wonder if anyone is on gabbly i shouldn't gabbly drunk but it's a hurricane outside and i was bored at the bar so what else should i do i like ubersite and imma go read some posts i think i hope theres something good oh look a cookie

Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-02 00:35:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I thought stagger said that spiders were "pretentious"

I was trying to figure that out.

Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-09-01 20:41:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Spiders. Spiders are poisonous.

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-01 19:57:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Too many contests...too little time...way too little interest.

One big johnson.

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-09-01 19:24:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

You're nowhere near as funny as you think you are.

Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-09-01 19:11:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I was just thinking to myself that old scourge was a pretty fine fella and that I sure could use something to do what with nothing really going on here...so um count me in or something or whatever...

...well you know what I mean, like if its cool or like if you're ok with it because...

WHOA DUDE....I JUST ONE A HAND WITH ACES FULL OF KINGS!!!!


Sorry

Listen...yeah I'm in your contest think or whatever. Do I need to do a submission, blood/semen sample ,proof of my pure aryan heritage? And who takes the sample and will it be anoni...ano...anono...anonymous?

PS - Call me, you know like tonight, when the wind is right and you know....you wanna....talk.






Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-09-01 18:47:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

4PPL3 S4UC3

Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-01 17:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:39:33 (#)
Ranking: 0

I hope to be in this, DPM, and UM all at the same time.
------
me too. unless i don't get into UM.

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:47:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Dear Scourge,

You have taken egotistical ranting/raving to new levels. I am impressed at how easily you were able to craft this supreme post dripping with condescension. You've skillfully crafted words that could almost be considered flattering in with phrases that are most definitely insulting. Your patriotic embrace of all that is Labor Day is incredible, its subtle mockery of all that the world sees as U.S. (see what I did there?) is beautiful. Finally the way that you have attempted to insult those posters from other nations is quite awesome. I love that you couched your mockery of their countries as humor.

I will not sell you the woman but I will participate in your silly little contest as long as you acknowledge my superiority in all things.

Love always, Barry


Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:46:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Gay

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:33:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Depending on the turnaround time, I'm in. I'm a busy Lishy. But I'll make a concerted effort for you, dear.

Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:14:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:06:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

You rock. You roll. You rock and roll.

Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-09-01 16:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I see this just after I have decided to compete in UM4?

Ah, well count me in. I probably won't get through the qualification process.

-Dave

Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Not ADD again... seriously.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:45:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:40:31 (#)
Ranking: 2

Snark - I think I knew that. This shouldn't step on UM I don't believe. last time I used a 500 word limit. May bump that a bit this time as a lot of people had trouble with it. But even at 750 most people around here should be able to knockit out in an hour. You could look at it as an appetitizer for UM. Helps get people into their writing groove.


Lishy- I did not realize that. Apparently I am EVIL. I like that. Join this.


==========================

I like the fact that I got something to compete in seeing as how I can't compete in UM. Flash fiction is a blast to write.

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:41:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:38:23 (#)
Ranking: -2

Who are you again?
---
Hello, lover.

Join my contest.

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:40:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Snark - I think I knew that. This shouldn't step on UM I don't believe. last time I used a 500 word limit. May bump that a bit this time as a lot of people had trouble with it. But even at 750 most people around here should be able to knockit out in an hour. You could look at it as an appetitizer for UM. Helps get people into their writing groove.


Lishy- I did not realize that. Apparently I am EVIL. I like that. Join this.

Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:39:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I hope to be in this, DPM, and UM all at the same time.

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:38:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Who are you again?

Submitted by Uberjunkie (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:36:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Scourge, you are perfect in every way and certainly the best author/person in the entire universe. I'm in love.

Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I hate you for this whole ADD thing. I just thought you should know.


Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:35:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

THIS POST HAS EXACTLY 666 WORDS.

I like you.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:34:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Us Canuckians celebrate Labor day as well.


What the hell, I'll give this here contest a go.

Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I'm behind you, Scourge!

Scourge for president!

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-01 15:29:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

This post is perfect in every way!


Anyway, we'd like to thank you for the occasional moments of peace and
love our family's experienced ... well, not today. You saw what
happened. Oh, Lord, be honest. Are we the most pathetic family in
the universe, or what?

-- Homer Simpson
Bart vs. Thanksgiving