Happy Birthday, Mr. Thorns (595 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.88 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Manda (View user info) at 2006-09-06 06:53:35 EDT
Yep. You're so old now that I have the right to call you Mr. Thorns and make you feel even older.
Thanks for listening to my eternal ranting, and for always being there with advice. I'm looking forward to "meeting" you in Boston hopefully next month. You're a great person and I'm truly lucky to be able to call you my friend.
So anyway, here's to the your 47th!
User Reviews
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-13 08:21:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am now officially back after a week of sabbatical. Did you enjoy it Mr. Laben?
"No reviews and no posts make Captain Thorns something something..."
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-09-06 20:14:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yea, horribly sorry about that. I think I'm past my skank phase.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-06 19:43:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, you haven't offered to do me in like, forever, so I had to shuffle you back to the rear of the line.
No, I don't want you to leave.
Doesn't matter to me on way or the other. I just liked the line.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-09-06 17:06:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Changing your tune, eh, Shlongy?
You're just huffy because I called you an old geezer. I hardly ever post, so there was really no need for that comment. It's like I'm gone 99% of the time already.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-06 14:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'd rather Manda left and you stayed around, Thorns.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 14:03:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And yes, you can all feel free to keep me in check on this. No further reviews or posts from now until next Wednesday, or else I'll post a picture of my own sphincter.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 14:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You want me gone, Shlongy?
Okay, I can do that. Honest. I'm not an Uber addict.
I'm outta here.
For at least a week.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-09-06 13:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay! Birthday!
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-09-06 12:57:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy, quit being a cranky old geezer.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-06 12:46:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, I saw it Thorns.
You wrote that last line as "time to time"...
I read it as "daily, or probably the same amount that I used to before I 'retired' from Uber".
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 11:59:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Shlongy...check that last line, first paragraph: "I'll drop in from time to time as able." (http://www.ubersite.com/m/91975)
So how does that equate to "retirement?"
Seriously, I can't help it the new employer's dragging ass on giving me work assignments. I'm chomping at the bit for work here but the trainer's knee deep in emergency shit. Try spending YOUR entire work day reading through manuals and documents without numbing yourself to sleep....
...thank God Uber isn't blocked here like half of everything else.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-06 11:50:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
He won't see this because he "retired" from UberSite. I remember reading that post.
Yeah. Right.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-06 11:35:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy Birthday!
Happy Puppies!
Happy Birthday!
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-09-06 10:34:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Baawwwwww cute puppies. Happy birthday Captain!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 09:36:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-09-06 09:26:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
I was completely convinced this was a Happy Birthday post to Capt. Thorns.
Capt. Thorns sure looked cute as a pup.
-------------------------------------------
Last I checked, that's exactly what it is...
And you're cute as a button. Whatever that means.
Submitted by slapsticky (user info) at 2006-09-06 09:31:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HapE birfdA
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-09-06 09:26:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was completely convinced this was a Happy Birthday post to Capt. Thorns.
Capt. Thorns sure looked cute as a pup.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2006-09-06 09:18:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yay doggy!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:39:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll do my best to round up enough asians here today to sing "Happy Bilthday, Captain Tholns."
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:38:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:35:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
47, huh?
So is it Pink Floyd we're doing, or Crosby, Stills and Nash?
HAHAHAHAHAHHA
================================================================
Yeah, I'm going to start calling myself "Shadow Captain."
Oh, captain, what are we hiding from?
You've been hiding from the start.
Did some lover steal your heart,
Or did the full moon make you mad?
Oh, captain, why these speechless seas
That never seem to land?
Oh I need to understand.
Could a little light be that bad?
I can see your hands are roughened
By the wheel and the rope.
I'd like to look to you for hope,
I think it's hiding there.
This boat is blacked out like a city
Awaiting bombers in the night.
Oh you hold your helm so tight,
And yet the sky seems so fair.
Who guides this ship
Dreaming through the seas
Turning and searching,
Whichever way you please?
Speak to me, I need to see your face,
Shadowy captain, in a darkened space.
If I were to spy a city
Floating just above the sea,
Could we stop
And look for me
Among those playing on the pier?
Or would you turn away knowing,
It was still a ways away,
And if I was there today
you could not see me all that clear.
Shadowy captain of a charcoal ship,
Trying to give the light the slip.
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
47, huh?
So is it Pink Floyd we're doing, or Crosby, Stills and Nash?
HAHAHAHAHAHHA
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And for the record no I am NOT 47...
29 would be the accurate age.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-06 08:28:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh dear god.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:44:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
That would make a Bonsai tree a shrub.
---
Motion carried.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That would make a Bonsai tree a shrub.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:42:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:37:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mutant vole
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:25:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Can we just have a concensus here? If an animal is that small, it cannot be a dog. I'm saying it's a mutant vole. Who's with me?
Feliz Cumpleaños, CT
Submitted by The_Mighty_Badger (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:19:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Couldn't afford to send a card?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:16:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thorny was 46 - hence he must now be 47. You can tell by the crows feet and liver spots.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:15:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He's NEVER that old!!!!!
Colour me flabbergasted.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:09:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought he was 48.
Happy Birthday Thorns.
-Dave
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-09-06 07:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
47?
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-09-06 06:54:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm off to college now. If this gets booted off the main page, I'll be sorely disappointed with the general population of Ubersite. CaptainThorns kicks ass.