Ubermadness IV - Whom's in it and Why? (3407 hits)
Category: UberMadness!Rating: 1.15 on 240 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Snark << snarkk.at.gmail.com (View user info) at 2006-09-07 12:55:05 EDT
The deadline has passed, the submissions are in and Uber has spoken!
UM IV is ready to roll... almost.
As predicted by some of our more 'in touch' Uberites, a few slots are still open.
- What does this mean?
This means if you submitted you're in. Congratulations to those who've made it.
-You mean I wrote and wrote and wrote for nothing?
No! Your submission is still being read by judges for the purposes of seeding. Fear not, your efforts were not in vain.
In order to fill the remaining slots, I am extending the deadline one last time to 12 Noon, Monday September 7, and I'm extending invites to those of the elite 8 (something I should have done to begin with) from last year, who haven't already entered.
If you're one of the 8 your seeding will reflect your performance last year.
In addition, I am removing the restrictions on people who forfeited last year.
In the event the remaining slots are not filled, we will be continuing with what we have.
Regardless of the empty slots, we have a good showing and some big hitters in this year's tournament and it promises to be one of the best yet.
Things are going GREAT so far. We have some very strong contenders, some fresh talented faces, and a distinct lack of the drama that pervaded the contest last year.
Judges have one week from Monday to finish going through submission. Titles for the first round of UM IV will be up the following Monday September 18. This will also give Shlongy time to polish his fangs, practice his swing, count his money, wax his pole, and do whatever else he needs to give Shlongy's corner that special 'Something'.
Forgot about the tourney? Just got out of Jail? Mom been keeping you in the cupboard under the sink again? (HOT)
It's not too late! Sent in your submission this weekend and take on of the last coveted slots.
Do you got what it takes to keep McCallum from regaining is crown? Are you better than Ezra?
Who knows, you could be the next Uberlord!
That's it. I'm spent.
Anyone got a cigarette?
Feel free to bitch, laugh or groan here and I will do my best to answer any questions you may have.
Google Image Search for Post Coital:
User Reviews
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-16 04:10:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-19 15:42:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-19 01:24:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:32:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-09-19 10:17:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-19 01:24:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:32:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-19 00:18:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 23:07:41 (#)
Ranking: 0
ParlorTrick and Bigmike have been added.
Bigmike. If you don't want in, let me know and I'll make adjustments later.
Everyone else. Our Master Seeder (I know I know... kinky) is finally free and finishing off seeding.
We're doing our best here. """
come to me with solutions please snark not problems.
;)
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-19 00:09:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hulk SMASH seed!
GRRRAAAAAHHHH!
I'm sorry, that makes no sense...
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-18 23:14:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't stress the timing, Snark... the hard work you guys are putting in is appreciated.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 23:12:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Finishing off?
How long is that then?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 23:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ParlorTrick and Bigmike have been added.
Bigmike. If you don't want in, let me know and I'll make adjustments later.
Everyone else. Our Master Seeder (I know I know... kinky) is finally free and finishing off seeding.
We're doing our best here.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-18 23:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:49:51 (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:49:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
----
Worked for me.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:26:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:21:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-09-18 22:19:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
put the blunt down Cro-Mag and let's go
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:54:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:11:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
ParlorTrick and Bigmike.
Shoot me an email...
Everyone else. I apologize, I'm still waiting for the seedings from the person in charge of them.
I think real life has reared its ugly head.
__________________
Why? Did you leave him to separate the seeds from the shake?
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:44:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep this on the MRR so people think it's been announced, and the pressure builds.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:11:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ParlorTrick and Bigmike.
Shoot me an email...
Everyone else. I apologize, I'm still waiting for the seedings from the person in charge of them.
I think real life has reared its ugly head.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:10:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:58:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:31:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
!!!SHOEHORN BIGMIKE IN NOW!!!
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:04:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't make me come over there.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-09-18 21:04:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:58:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:31:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
!!!SHOEHORN BIGMIKE IN NOW!!!
V
V
V
V
_________________________________________
I agree.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, Shlongy, that depends on whether you're planning to be here in 2017 when this thing finally gets underway.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I forgot...am I involved in this?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:31:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
!!!SHOEHORN BIGMIKE IN NOW!!!
V
V
V
V
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:29:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So you move the starting date forward, which would give me an additional couple of days if I needed it, and I have already conceded my participation based on the original timeline.
Rats.
Good luck everyone.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-18 20:19:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-09-17 11:36:02 (#)
Ranking: -2
Nobody puts Danger in a corner.
---------------------
thank you, Manic.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-18 19:44:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
soooooooooo...............
what's happening?
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 19:32:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So.....
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 17:54:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm awake, where is it?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 14:12:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Everyone is in. I just got the last judges scores a little over an hour now, so me and Badass are scrambling to get seedings to you guys ASAP, but it's gonna be awhile.
You'll have your answers today.
I've emailed Bart and asked him to have the first round ready to go for Wed.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 14:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're in.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-09-18 13:55:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All I want to know is if I got in. My submission was such that if I did get in, I am playing McCallum in round one.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-09-18 13:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
One day I'll learn english and enter this competition.
*looks up out of hole in orphanege roof*
Someday...
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-18 13:02:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:42:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Gonna be awhile Darko, get some sleep.
--------
What is the general area of time? +/- 2 hours?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:57:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
TEll US NOW.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:42:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Gonna be awhile Darko, get some sleep.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:41:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how long til you post this? Should I go to sleep or will it be up within the next ten minutes?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:33:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:27:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:24:51 (#)
Ranking: 0
WELL??!!
-------------------------------
I must apologize with Snark's slow movements so far in regard to Ubermadness. I ask that everyone remember that he is doing the best he can, but he is still dealing with the handicap of being Canadian.
================================
It's so fucking cold here... hard to type.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:27:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:24:51 (#)
Ranking: 0
WELL??!!
-------------------------------
I must apologize with Snark's slow movements so far in regard to Ubermadness. I ask that everyone remember that he is doing the best he can, but he is still dealing with the handicap of being Canadian.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:24:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WELL??!!
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:21:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I really wanted my title before I went to school so I could think about something other than school...Instead I must suffer the agony that is universitet.
How I weep.
And question whether or not to do something with my hair....
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:17:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Parlortrick is good. I think a travesty of justice could possibly happen... Let Parlortrick in.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-18 12:15:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 10:11:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-18 11:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Do you want in this thing Parlor?
Everyone Else,
Got the last scores from judges... working on seedings and post now.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-18 10:11:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-18 08:55:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHOM'S IN IT AND WHY, SNARK?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-18 08:22:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shouldn't we be finding out about these today?
WELL. WHAT ARE THE SEEDINGS!!!? I WANT TO FUCKIN KNOW.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-17 17:18:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The ubermadness site is down now, so you can't see graphically what I'm talking about, but as an example, JMG and Slovin only made it to the sweet 16 and ended up leapfrogging over other people in the final standings because of their wins in the consolation bracket.
ParlorTrick, who made the elite 8 along with me, ended up in 12th place because she, like many of the rest of us that had to endure the consolation bracket crap, didn't give a shit at that point.
If you're inviting those who made the the elite 8, you should be inviting the following:
stevie_says
domenad
jack11058
antluvdog
Pentameter
ETS
ParlorTrick
That's all I was saying.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/74831
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-17 17:03:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ETS,
Send me an email about the final rankings. I'm not sure I get where you are coming from...
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-17 01:20:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:22:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark --
Silly, silly me. For some reason I was under the false impression that I HAD made it to the Elite 8 last UberMadness when ACTUALLY I ranked 12th.
------------------
You did make it to the elite 8. The final rankings were bullshit. We all know that. Someone who only got to the sweet 16 had no business outranking someone who made the elite 8 based solely on their performace in the crappy consolation brackets.
IF you don't get an invite, then neither do I.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-16 03:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope I wasn't out of line with that pie hole bit. I don't even know what a pie hole is, I just wanted to sound clever.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-16 03:22:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 17:59:23 (#)
Ranking: 0
A full list will be published on Monday.
Crystle, you're in. Pretty much everyone is.
Except D_R. There are dead people in and and boat people in and little babies that won't even be born until Monday in and make believe people from the movies in and even people from other planes of existence in, but not him.
------------------------
Fuck you Snark, I'm not reading your fucking Coventown 2 until you answer me. Go fuck a pie hole.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-16 02:55:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dayum, DR.
Just...
WOW.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-09-16 02:47:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-13 16:27:58 (#)
Ranking: -1
Correction: I'm not hard
^^^^^^^^^^^^
I bet you tell that to all your boyfriends.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-16 02:14:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So, bifocal boy, am I in or what?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 13:09:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ASHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-13 20:41:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope I wasn't out of line with that C3PO remark.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-13 20:32:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
*puts on best Eric Cartman voice*
"I'm assumin' if I haven't heard back that means I'm not in...?"
"Sure you're in, Coley, everyone's in, except for Danger."
"Am I in too, Snarkie Poo?"
"Is your name Ranger, Jay?"
"Sweet.."
"Pretty much everybody in the whole world is in, just not Ranger."
Suck my fat one, Four Eyes. And the turd wasn't out of focus, the hamster was. My dog (who's dead btw - thanks for sullying any lasting memories I have of him), hadn't been able to shit ever since he and I accidentally got those 52 ping pong balls caught up his butt, and he yawned and hiccupped and we lost the first twelve.
His pet hamster Argyle volunteered late one night while sleeping to be zipped up snuggly in a little poop costume we had Gunter from wardrobe fashion out of an old walking sock we had lying around, I screamed "ACTION!!", and Gunter sent Argyle in with the deft whack of a rubber mallet.
Argyle woke with quite a start after going in through my dog's out door, and exclaimed (after getting over his initial shock), that "Someone appears to have left some moth balls stacked up against your colon...". "Big ones." he concluded. "Maybe moth balls expand like tampons.." he mused, and it was then that Cleveland, my dog, stopped enjoying the sensation of having a talking acrylic walking sock with a rather cold zipper sewn into it up his poop-shute and expelled it like a human canon ball at the circus but in a more hind-legs first kind of fashion.
Gunter yelled "That's a wrap!", and using the footage we had caught on the small surgical camera we had mounted in the front end of the sock, we storyboarded the whole shebang, still by still, well neither Gunter or I are artists per se, and photo's make great pictures, and after pouring over what were essentially 2 dozen fairly dark and obscure images for what seemed like hours we just shrugged and ran with the still Gunter had caught on his Olympus C765.
And it wasn't 'blurred', it was 'steamy'.
And I also think it's pretty fucking rich that Ol' 4x4 eyes here thinks he's in any fucking position to critique my art, you're a regular jack of all trades aren't you Helen Keller? They must give you a big fucking sheriff's badge when you join that (finger quotes}, "committee", that says "I'm a huge pompous arse I have a fucking opinion on everything because I'm a (more finger quotes), "Juuuuuuuudge..."."
Snark: "Did you send a submission I didn't see?? Oh please, please tell me if that's the case Danger and I'll do my utmost to right these critical errors that obviously happened at some kind of clerical level."
Do you honestly think people can't see through that Cunty McCanaidiancunt? Really??
Fuck you C3PO, right in the star spangled maple leaf. Or whatever. I don't need this site anymore.
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-09-13 18:04:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*weeps*
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 17:59:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A full list will be published on Monday.
Crystle, you're in. Pretty much everyone is.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-09-13 16:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haven't heard back :-( <ubersobs>
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-13 16:27:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Correction: I'm not hard at work on anything.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-09-13 16:16:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The title of your submission was awesome but the content was nothing but a picture of a dog taking a shit in your back yard.
***
i realize i have no say in the matter but i think you should let D_R in: "the madness"
because this was the funniest fucking thing i have read all week
and..."the turd was out of focus" aaaaaaaaahahahahaha!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:47:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I already own the bootleg version.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:43:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
sweet, thanks bud.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:37:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm assuming if I haven't heard back that means I'm not in...?
============
You is in.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm assuming if I haven't heard back that means I'm not in...?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:21:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jay,
We're running this thing with 58 peoples which rocks cuz we have a shorter tourney and haven't really lost any of our heavy hitters.
This years winner wins the 4 hour epic home film "Urethra Cam - Part 2" by JMG... or maybe not.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:14:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's what's happening guys:
Judges are hard at work on your submissions. I hope to have everything done by Friday so I can work with BAMF and have seedings ready for Monday.
If Bart has the time, the judges are able to rip through your submissions and my therapist lets me out on a day pass, I want this contest to start Monday the 18th. Lot's of factors at play but I'll do my best to make it happen.
This means you would get your seedings and titles the day this thing starts. I know I said you'd get them before the start but I'm tired of delays and I want to get this fucker on the road.
If we can get things rolling for Monday, you'll still have a week to submit your first story, so don't fret too much.
Also it is important to note that, although I lost my virginity in prison years ago, I'm still pure at heart.
Thank you and God Bless.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:04:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-13 06:14:39 (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you Snark. Every Uber Madness I ask how to get in, you ask me to email a submission, and you never reply. The next thing I know one of my drafts has been submitted as your final entry and I send you a 'erm WTF' email and you block it.
YOU can lick the residue from the crack of my bum Borey, like if I'm DEAD, and have forgotten to leave "BTFUCKINGW WHATEVER HAPPENS DON'T LET SNARK LICK THE RESIDUE OUT OF THE CRACK OF MY BUM UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES" out of my last will and testament, like THAT'S gonna happen. I would totally own this "writers" competition and you know it. I could fucking forfeit and still fucking win.
And while I'm at it, why don't you and your (finger quotes) "committee", go and sit in your fucking star chamber, completely RANDOMLY generate your 'draw', manipulate the reviews, and spooge all over your elitist parker pens? THEN, when you've SOMEHOW made the final again, come up with a title something along the lines of "Dear Snark, here is my submission for this years Uber Madness, How I got Soap on a Rope Accidentally Caught up my Bum, I anxiously await your reply", but cut it back to How I got Soap on a Rope Accidentally Caught up my Bum, and then miraculously win again.
Get fucking the fuck fucking fuck fucked four eyes.
Everything you ever wanted to know about Snark
he is ghey.
==============================================
Well maybe I am ghey or maybe I AM GHEY (but only for you)
As to the rest:
The title of your submission was awesome but the content was nothing but a picture of a dog taking a shit in your back yard. I would have sent it to the judges but the turd was completely out of focus and the dog didn't look like it was enjoying itself at all.
I did send it to PETA though. Forcing a dog to shit for art is evil. I hope you know that.
errrrrrrr did you send a submission that was blocked? Let me know if something like that did happen.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-13 06:16:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope I wasn't out of line with that four eyes thing.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-13 06:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you Snark. Every Uber Madness I ask how to get in, you ask me to email a submission, and you never reply. The next thing I know one of my drafts has been submitted as your final entry and I send you a 'erm WTF' email and you block it.
YOU can lick the residue from the crack of my bum Borey, like if I'm DEAD, and have forgotten to leave "BTFUCKINGW WHATEVER HAPPENS DON'T LET SNARK LICK THE RESIDUE OUT OF THE CRACK OF MY BUM UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES" out of my last will and testament, like THAT'S gonna happen. I would totally own this "writers" competition and you know it. I could fucking forfeit and still fucking win.
And while I'm at it, why don't you and your (finger quotes) "committee", go and sit in your fucking star chamber, completely RANDOMLY generate your 'draw', manipulate the reviews, and spooge all over your elitist parker pens? THEN, when you've SOMEHOW made the final again, come up with a title something along the lines of "Dear Snark, here is my submission for this years Uber Madness, How I got Soap on a Rope Accidentally Caught up my Bum, I anxiously await your reply", but cut it back to How I got Soap on a Rope Accidentally Caught up my Bum, and then miraculously win again.
Get fucking the fuck fucking fuck fucked four eyes.
Everything you ever wanted to know about Snark
he is ghey.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 22:22:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Quick question, did you get 64+ submissions?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:54:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-12 14:19:28 (#)
Ranking: 0
Snark... is NEXT Monday still title release day?
__________________________________
NEXT Monday? Is this shit ever gonna start?
"Seeding" is what I did to my wife, until we discovered what it did. . . :)
Gimme a date of when titles are up.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:39:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-11 12:03:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
WHERE'S MA TITLE????
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:22:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark --
Silly, silly me. For some reason I was under the false impression that I HAD made it to the Elite 8 last UberMadness when ACTUALLY I ranked 12th. Just a self serving rewriting of history in my head which I'm going to blame on ETS as he was kind enough to praise all of my UM III posts with "Congratulations to the Elite 8" and well, I don't question anything ETS says.
Sorry for the confusion. Carry on...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-12 14:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Snark... is NEXT Monday still title release day?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-12 13:02:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-09-09 04:06:55 (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent! I made it to the top 64. I've exceeded my expectations already.
Thanks for the invite. Please add me to the list.
=================
Huh?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-09-12 12:51:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
um, i missed it twice.
go me.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 12:14:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd like one of you broads to submit to blowing me.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-12 12:05:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
So if we're in are we free to do whatever we want with our submissions?
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-12 10:52:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hardcore.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-12 01:50:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, committee, for working hard on this while the rest of us sit around bitching.
And now back to my Trailer Park Boys Marathon.
Next Episode: The Green Bastard.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-11 22:56:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-11 20:24:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, I completed all my rankings - and thanks to whomever offered hot sweaty lesbian sexx with me - your bribery worked!
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-11 18:50:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
sweeet, thanks snark
I menat to add in that last review "we'll see, I didn't want to bug you about it" etc.
So now I know :)
thanks!
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-11 18:04:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You will definitely be told first round seedings before your start.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-11 17:33:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If seedings come out next week, when the hell does this start? You aren't going to have us go into this without knowing our seeds/opponents are you?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-11 17:29:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's been a hell of a couple of days.
Those who have sent submissions but haven't heard back, will hear tonight.
Judges are reviewing submissions now and seedings etc will be anounced early next week.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-09-11 17:09:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When do the cows return?
I've sent my milk, but I'm afraid it'll turn into sour cream in the mail...
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-11 15:53:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope you got my shizzle. I sent it in yesterday but haven't heard back.
We'll see
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-11 15:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so what is the updated timescales?
do we get the seedings etc soon?
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-11 12:03:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHERE'S MA TITLE????
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-09-11 02:41:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
im going to send in a submission. i thought i missed the deadline but I feel like participating, and I have no time to write anything new, so im sending you some bullshit i wrote for some other website.
mmk pumpkin?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-11 02:28:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i'm not happy about the forfeit thing by the way.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-10 11:23:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submission sent.
:-)
ETS, if we match up, TRUST ME, homeboy, you'll cry conspiracy because I beat you so bad.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-10 09:38:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can I just send something I've already written? How about something someone else has written? Something you've written?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-09-10 09:35:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hehe blue screens..
Submitted by Awko (user info) at 2006-09-10 09:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This title gets a +2 without me even reading it or caring about UM.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-09 19:36:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2006-09-09 15:46:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
when the hell did all this happen
______________________________
When you were burying your bone in the big pine tree
in my back yard.
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2006-09-09 15:46:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
when the hell did all this happen
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-09-09 04:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Heavy-hitter alert!
|
|
|
v
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-09-09 04:06:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent! I made it to the top 64. I've exceeded my expectations already.
Thanks for the invite. Please add me to the list.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-09 00:09:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My soup is in the bowl marked 'Method'.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2006-09-09 00:04:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/73385
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-09-08 23:38:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm going to pee in everyone's soup.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-08 23:08:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-08 22:56:00 (#)
Ranking: 0
true.
Whens cut off date again?
I can't really write at work.
===========
Monday 12 EST Bro.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-08 22:56:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
true.
Whens cut off date again?
I can't really write at work.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-08 21:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-08 21:06:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait? ETS *is* in?
Can I still post jam 800 times and get in?
==========
OR, you could put a little effort in and guarantee your submission doesn't accidentally find binary hell on my hardrive.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-09-08 21:13:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ETS; I ain't entering this, try d-prime madness, you could go for the double, I seem to remember you writing fairly decent, though cliched, stuff.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-08 21:06:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait? ETS *is* in?
Can I still post jam 800 times and get in?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-08 19:05:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-08 11:28:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:09:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
UM Hitlist:
Indo
Ghola
Greening
McCallum
Wardy
Woody
You guys better pray you don't have to face me. You will be ripped asunder in the maelstrom of my reserved literary power.
-------
I don't even know who you are.
--------------
Yet after I stomp your ass in this competition, you will not be able to forget me.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-08 17:03:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just want to post the damn thing I submitted.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-08 11:28:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:09:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
UM Hitlist:
Indo
Ghola
Greening
McCallum
Wardy
Woody
You guys better pray you don't have to face me. You will be ripped asunder in the maelstrom of my reserved literary power.
-------
I don't even know who you are.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-09-08 04:19:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't finish reading this but SWEEEEEEEEEET
I was gone all week and din't make it..now to finish...
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-08 02:20:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:45:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
Due to 8,000 things going on at the time of the old deadline, I started a submission but I didn't finish it.
Since the Elite 8 are auto-invites, I accept the invitation.
I'm in.
------
Yay!
Look out ETS... you are going to be beaten by a girl!
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-07 23:30:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHERE'S MY TITLE?????????!!!!!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-07 22:23:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:08:53 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:03:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
UberapathyIV
-------------
You try so hard.
Don't worry. Someday, someone will pay attention to you.
--
heh-heh-heh
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:58:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
death
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:34:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:13:36 (#)
Ranking: 0
"Titles for the first round of UM IV will be up the following Monday September 18."
This is why I cannot play. I am on vacation that entire week and out of town with no access to a computer. Maybe I can catch a big bass, tie my entry to it and send it in to snark to post for me. Otherwise I'll have to wait until the next competition to give it a go.
Real life vacations rule, especially when there is an entire week of nothing but catching huge bass and northern pike.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, it won't be me...
But you missed a golden "fag below" opportunity, Snark.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:08:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:03:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
UberapathyIV
-------------
You try so hard.
Don't worry. Someday, someone will pay attention to you.
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 21:03:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
UberapathyIV
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:52:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:13:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:37:01 (#)
Ranking: 1
You missed a great chance to streamline the contest.
But now that you've extended the deadline, could you do it again and again and again?
The more JonnyX has to read, the less he seems to post.
------
That has nothing do with it, Sfaggy.
------
Too busy picking up marines in Oceanside, huh?
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:37:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:05:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:58:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:56:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
My piece of shit entry got me in!!!??
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:35:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:57:15 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:12:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
add me to that list chump i would take great pleasure in handing you your ass!
------------------
Your inclusion goes without saying, Globehead. Your suffering will be legendary.
__________
It is impossible to write decent fiction while wearing a tinfoil hat, so if you want
to write a good post, Mr. Bush will gather all your thoughts as you write. Do you
really want that to happen? :)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:28:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So, did I get in?
I've not been paying any attention lately and I had to put down a dog...and it's been raining, a lot...and...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-07 20:13:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:37:01 (#)
Ranking: 1
You missed a great chance to streamline the contest.
But now that you've extended the deadline, could you do it again and again and again?
The more JonnyX has to read, the less he seems to post.
------
That has nothing do with it, Sfaggy.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:12:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
add me to that list chump i would take great pleasure in handing you your ass!
------------------
Your inclusion goes without saying, Globehead. Your suffering will be legendary.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:50:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So what sort of penalty are the people who didn't submit before the deadline going to face?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:12:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
add me to that list chump i would take great pleasure in handing you your ass!
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:09:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
UM Hitlist:
Indo
Ghola
Greening
McCallum
Wardy
Woody
You guys better pray you don't have to face me. You will be ripped asunder in the maelstrom of my reserved literary power.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2006-09-07 19:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:58:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:56:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
My piece of shit entry got me in!!!??
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:03:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
I am tempted to enter myself just so I can beat ghola down for calling me a douchebag.
--
Enter yourself?
No need to be so polite.
We tell you to fuck yourself all the time.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:21:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:19:48 (#)
Ranking: -1
"Whom's"
"Whom is"
"Whom" is an object, not a subject. "Who's" would have been correct.
I must -1 this. ""
fucking n00b.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:20:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:19:48 (#)
Ranking: -1
"Whom's"
"Whom is"
"Whom" is an object, not a subject. "Who's" would have been correct.
I must -1 this.
---------
Search Electro's username for Paid In Full. You should know this by now.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:20:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I reserve the right to mock myself.
I skimmed the post and didn't even notice the deadline extension.
Thanks <EMOTICON>
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:19:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
"Whom's"
"Whom is"
"Whom" is an object, not a subject. "Who's" would have been correct.
I must -1 this.
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:18:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah? I got more than 16 entries. Looks like only SOME OF US can meet our dues. Pwned.
Submitted by WingedFoote (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:11:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+2 for being ubermadness, a chance to see some real good writing
-1 for incorrect grammar
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:08:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:03:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
I am tempted to enter myself just so I can beat ghola down for calling me a douchebag.
----
when did i do that?
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-09-07 18:03:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am tempted to enter myself just so I can beat ghola down for calling me a douchebag.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-07 17:41:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
woot or something.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-09-07 17:17:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:08:50 (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, if they end up begging me to enter and I DO decide to grace this competition with my very presence, I hope to personally wipe the floor with your ass just for DARING to call me rude!
----
To be honest, ETS' UM posts are original, which is damn tough in a competition like that.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:45:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Due to 8,000 things going on at the time of the old deadline, I started a submission but I didn't finish it.
Since the Elite 8 are auto-invites, I accept the invitation.
I'm in.
Submitted by whysenheimer (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:37:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You missed a great chance to streamline the contest.
But now that you've extended the deadline, could you do it again and again and again?
The more JonnyX has to read, the less he seems to post.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:18:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:13:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
If you end up with too many people after yet another deadline change, will you remove any of the prior people?
If not and 50 or so people entered that means this post is basically saying that 12 people can still get in, correct?
============================
The original entrants are in. That's me saying "Thank you" for being the foundation of the contest.
If we get more than the remaining slots allow, those that aren't elite 8 will be decided by submission score.
I'm not sure of the exact number of slots Darko. I haven't counted slots vs today's submissions vs elite 8 etc.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:13:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you end up with too many people after yet another deadline change, will you remove any of the prior people?
If not and 50 or so people entered that means this post is basically saying that 12 people can still get in, correct?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:09:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jam jam jam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jamjam jam
Lost count... what am I up to?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 16:04:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I'll submit "jam" 800 times.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:58:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:56:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
AAAAAAAAAAaaahahahahahahaahahahaha!!!
My piece of shit entry got me in!!!??
Shit.
Does this mean that if I had gone with my orginal idea of submitting 'Fuck You' copied 400 times I would still have qualified?
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:48:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GO UBERMADNESS, WOO!!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:46:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jay, just stay cool, man. You've written a few pieces better than anything produced by half the loudmouths on this site.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:44:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:32:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, glad to see all the cocksuckers who can't stand me *again* misunderstand my fucking point.
------
and that was...mmf mmf jam?
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:34:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:35:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
Shameful.
How many people entered via email?
12?
-----
50 something I believe.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:33:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
When the time comes, you will find your title by clicking on the "Submit" link. You know, the place where people should really stop and think before making asses out of themselves.
You will still be able to submit normally to Ubersite, but you will also see a link that says "Click here to submit your UberMadness entry, 'Title' "
Click on the link, and either write or paste your post in.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-09-07 15:01:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So we just wait until somebody post the titles and then we go underway.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:56:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AAAAAAAAAAaaahahahahahahaahahahaha!!!
My piece of shit entry got me in!!!??
Shit.
Does this mean that if I had gone with my orginal idea of submitting 'Fuck You' copied 400 times I would still have qualified?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:42:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not all Apollo, I'm sure there are a few folks here and there who don't despise me.
*chirp*
*chirp*
*chirp*
Fuck.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:40:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No worries.
Send a short bit of writing (800 words max) to umsubs.at.gmail.com
Make sure your username is in the subject of the email.
.doc or .txt format preferred, double spaced please.
Write whatever you want.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:37:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry if i'm asking questions that have already been answered (adnauseum), but what are the requirements for submissions?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:32:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, glad to see all the cocksuckers who can't stand me *again* ""
that'd be all of ubersite then.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:35:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shameful.
How many people entered via email?
12?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:33:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:32:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
Where does one send an 'application' ?
=====================
umsubs.at.gmail.com
Was hoping we'd hear from you.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:32:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, glad to see all the cocksuckers who can't stand me *again* misunderstand my fucking point.
I'd be shocked, except it always happens, and I've started to actually expect that shit.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Where does one send an 'application' ?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:28:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:26:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm blaming my not being in the contest on Razor
If it had run on the original timing, I wouldn't have been buried with work and missed all the posts about entering.
yes, the world SHOULD revolve around me.
<sigh>
Looking forward to some good reading here.
================
So enter already.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:26:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm blaming my not being in the contest on Razor
If it had run on the original timing, I wouldn't have been buried with work and missed all the posts about entering.
yes, the world SHOULD revolve around me.
<sigh>
Looking forward to some good reading here.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:24:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahahahahaha! I just noticed the Uberboard.
A dollar well spent.
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:22:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
gheypig: if you're going to traumatize yourself over writing an entry for a competion that nobody gives a rat's ass if you enter or not , why bother? yea. o.k. you want to suck your own internet dick. but you might want to consider this...the stress of it all might push those fat hardened arteries over the edge causing a coronary. do you really want to be found by a neighbour whos investigating the stronger than usual stench hazing out of your apartment , with your sweatpants around your ankles sat at the computer where ubersite's still running.
on second thoughts, you should enter. LET JAY IN. LET JAY IN.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:12:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:58:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:16:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Be nice or I WILL steal your girlfriend.
------------------
I'd be lying if I said I didn't secretly hope to one day sit in the corner of the room in a very comfortable chair while you TRY.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Only after she gets through with my wife... or vice versa.
----------------
I'm sure we can dig up 2 vvery comfortable chairs somewhere.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:12:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
woo
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:10:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:08:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
My cat's breath smells like cat food.
Imagine that.
I have mosquito bites and they are annoying the ever living shit out of me.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:08:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My cat's breath smells like cat food.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:07:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Listen, Jaypig. *I* don't care if *you* do enter, because *I* still hated all *your* bullshit stories last time and now *I* got to derive laughter from the fact that *you* actually said that *you* 'fretted' over *your* entries.
*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA* *AAAAHAHAHAHAHA*
*dies*
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:06:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:59:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:29:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
See, now I'm conflicted...
I kinda wanna enter now, since the forfeit restriction was lifted (although I still say I didn't forfeit, I DID make an entry, although it was shiite.) but I dunno if I wanna go through that again...
===
We don't want you to have to go through that either, jay. I know your selfless dedication to Bart will make you struggle on through the competition at the expense of your health, happiness and dignity, so we'll just ban you to remove the temptation.
It's ok, don't thank us. We only want the best for you, big guy. Stay well, sweet prince.
---------------------
And she's on the fucking committee?
Listen, slagwhore, *I* don't know if *I* want to put *myself* through all that damn writing, because last year *I* fretted over *my* stories way to much, yet at the same time *I* really enjoyed it last year because *I* felt like *I* did some of *my* best work and *I* would like to see if *I* can do it again.
If anywhere in that statement I mentioned anyone else, please let me know, because I hate it when I put in un-needed pronouns while sleepwriting.
Now shut the fuck up, cross the pond, birth the fucking anti-christ and die.
*kiss*
===
What's that you say? You don't want to enter? Awh, sweetheart, why didn't you just say. It's ok, I'll arrange for your submission to be taken out of the loop, as a special favour to you. No-one will need know.
You better get back to work now dear, that reception phone won't man itself.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-07 14:01:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bart should do a pose like Bill's for us to use in all UM posts.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:59:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:29:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
See, now I'm conflicted...
I kinda wanna enter now, since the forfeit restriction was lifted (although I still say I didn't forfeit, I DID make an entry, although it was shiite.) but I dunno if I wanna go through that again...
===
We don't want you to have to go through that either, jay. I know your selfless dedication to Bart will make you struggle on through the competition at the expense of your health, happiness and dignity, so we'll just ban you to remove the temptation.
It's ok, don't thank us. We only want the best for you, big guy. Stay well, sweet prince.
---------------------
And she's on the fucking committee?
Listen, slagwhore, *I* don't know if *I* want to put *myself* through all that damn writing, because last year *I* fretted over *my* stories way to much, yet at the same time *I* really enjoyed it last year because *I* felt like *I* did some of *my* best work and *I* would like to see if *I* can do it again.
If anywhere in that statement I mentioned anyone else, please let me know, because I hate it when I put in un-needed pronouns while sleepwriting.
Now shut the fuck up, cross the pond, birth the fucking anti-christ and die.
*kiss*
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:58:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:16:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Be nice or I WILL steal your girlfriend.
------------------
I'd be lying if I said I didn't secretly hope to one day sit in the corner of the room in a very comfortable chair while you TRY.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Only after she gets through with my wife... or vice versa.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:55:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, I'm in.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:16:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
Be nice or I WILL steal your girlfriend.
------------------
I'd be lying if I said I didn't secretly hope to one day sit in the corner of the room in a very comfortable chair while you TRY.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:52:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:29:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
See, now I'm conflicted...
I kinda wanna enter now, since the forfeit restriction was lifted (although I still say I didn't forfeit, I DID make an entry, although it was shiite.) but I dunno if I wanna go through that again...
===
We don't want you to have to go through that either, jay. I know your selfless dedication to Bart will make you struggle on through the competition at the expense of your health, happiness and dignity, so we'll just ban you to remove the temptation.
It's ok, don't thank us. We only want the best for you, big guy. Stay well, sweet prince.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:50:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sept 18 is Match Up day... as in you will see who goes against who...
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:50:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like the cut of your jib, Snark.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:49:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:48:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
v
v
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
================
I'm not sure what you're getting at.
Try and be clearer.
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:48:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
v
v
WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?WHEN WILL WE SEE BRACKETS?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jgreening: SHUT UP YOU ARE SHIT AT EVERYTHING
AJ: NO ONE GIVES A FUCK IF YOU ENTER OR NOT
Method: SEE ABOVE
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:42:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Woohoo!
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:41:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:37:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:34:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a lion
================
I'm a scarecrow.
================
The sexual tension in that movie was between Lion and Tin Man, Scarecrow and Dorothy...
you lucky bastard
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:38:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Knew it.
Auto-invites are not a bad idea.
I think I've proven myself at least twice (maybe not so much in UM 3). I thought about not entering.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
or uh.... 1st prize.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:37:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:34:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a lion
================
I'm a scarecrow.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:37:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There's no second prize for the whole thing though Loki.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:36:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would like to thank the academy.
oh wait
everybody "won"?
oh crap this is like the time in 5th grade when I got a trophy for playing soccer even though our team didn't win a single game
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-09-07 13:34:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm considering retracting my submission partly because this is becoming the indoctrination of a new constitution and partly because I have to take a massive shit right now. I'll be back in a few minutes.
Submitted by goferforhire (