The coming of the Messiah (Part II) (555 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.5 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sunny Gurm <sunnygurm.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-09-10 09:29:32 EDT
Part One: http://www.ubersite.com/m/86044
Another bright Sunday afternoon, I was settling in watching some 7's Rugby. I was still a bit hung over, still unbathed, and my turban was rather dirty.
I had totally forgotten about those "Watchtower" fools who had come by warning me of Jesus Christ's impending invasion. Then I heard the doorbell ring.
I saw that bald fucker again, and I just smiled. This time he didn't bring his bitch however, it was some other decrepit old man. They both looked like those personal injury attourneys you see ads for on TV. Celino and Barnes type of guys. Nice suits assholes, good to know the donations to your "church" go somewhere.
Upstairs my dad had just finished showering, and he leaned over the banister to hear me answer the door. Now before I delve into this, let me tell you something about my dad. Hes one of those Indian guys who was raised in England and ended up with some sort of cross breed of an accent. It's a British accent, but Indian-ized. It is really odd, when hes talking to other Indians, the Indian accent comes out. When hes talking to white people, all of a sudden he's Mr. Anglo Saxon.
I digress. The creepy old man looks at me.
Watchtower Guy 1: Beautiful day. Isn't it?
SunnyG: Yeah, I guess so.
Watchtower Guy 2: *stares*
WG1: Last time we met, I left you some reading material.
SG: Yeeeeah, about that...
WG1: I came by with some more.
Now at this point, my dad realizes who they are.
My Dad: (Indian accent) SUNNY, TELL THOSE FUCKERS TO LEAVE
SG: (Yelling back in Punjabi) Come on dad, it'll only take a minute.
WG1: (completely disregarded my dad calling him a fucker) I just wanted to leave you some more material for you to read. *smiles*
SG: I can't wait
WG2: *keeps staring*
WG1: Yeah, this pamphlet is about 9/11, and what it means to the world
SG: Neat
WG1: Also, it is about who will feed the earth once war has taken over. And how the world will not be able to sustain itself in the future.
SG: Oh my god...can Jesus help us? *panic stricken tone*
WG1: *creepy smile* Yes, Sunny. And I want you to read it
SG: Well awesome, awesome. Real good stuff here fellas.
Dad: SUNNY, TELL THEM TO FUCK OFF
SG: Well I'll read through these fellas.
WG1: And I'll come back to check up on you.
SG: Lookin' forward to it
WG2: *no expression, continues staring*
*SLAM DOOR SHUT*
What is it with these fuckers? Even with a big angry Indian man yelling at them, they still hold their ground with that shit eating grin. I'm gonna feel like a big asshole if it turns out they're right.
My master plan however is still intact. I'll keep them coming back, until they invite me to their church. Then I can get in on the drug smuggling or whatever it is that they do. Until next time...
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-08-17 10:34:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-08-16 13:46:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-08-16 11:07:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
auto indian +2
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2007-08-16 11:05:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-16 10:40:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Retal. Deal with it.
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You wouldn't need to retaliate if you didn't post total shit, emo boy.
Submitted by azurefroz (user info) at 2007-08-16 10:40:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Retal. Deal with it.
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2006-09-11 12:17:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
sorry again sunny.
Submitted by Happily_Agnostic (user info) at 2006-09-11 07:00:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GOLD
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-10 11:18:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny shit.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-09-10 09:57:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2