Recipe for a Jaypig Martini (1256 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.35 on 71 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jewfag (View user info) at 2006-09-12 16:17:57 EDT
User Reviews
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-14 23:33:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm not the biggest prick in the world.
I'm sure I can name 3-4 bigger cocksmokes than me, just here on Uber.
So I'd be the 4th or 5th biggest prick.
I can live with that.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2006-09-14 11:28:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, essentially he reminds me of me, before I turned 16 and grew out of it.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2006-09-14 11:28:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You know, every time I see his face or his reviews I just kind of shudder like I just saw some old guy who was horribly burned by a nuke. I'm not even sure what it is. Maybe it's his perpetual vigilantism. Maybe it's because he's easily the biggest prick in the world. Hard telling.
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2006-09-14 01:02:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
theres no hotsauce.
Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2006-09-13 17:24:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
God I love e-wars.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-09-13 17:06:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JediMasterJambi (user info) at 2006-09-13 15:02:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Cocaine's Rating made me sneeze milk, other than that, I don't really understand why you would piss in a martini glass and waste a perfectly good strip of bacon. Unless you like pee covered bacon...that dosn't quite do it for me though...
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-09-13 14:24:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-09-13 14:23:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by cocaine (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:55:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
jesus christ boys...it's like reading an excerpt from a script born in third grade.
the both of you.
caul: "jay is a fat retard"
jay: "caul is a gay french-canadian"
caul: "jay is fat and unoriginal"
jay: "caul like dicks in his mouth"
caul: "nuh-uh"
jay: "yeah-huh"
caul: "fuck you fatty"
<shoves jay>
<jay doesn't move>
jay: "you're only touching me because you're gay and want to feel the warm skin of another man"
caul: "you didn't move because your 800 pound body is now grafted to the earth."
jay: "..............i'm telling...........BAAAAAAAAAARRRRRT!!!"
bart: "stop it you two"
jay: "but he <sniff> won't stop calling me fat"
bart: "stop calling him fat, caul"
caul: "but all he does is make alters and eat all day...i'm really scared for his health and, in order to motivate him to lose weight, i'm calling him fat."
bart: "that never works, you know"
caul: "i know"
bart: "so can you two please shake hands and be friends so that i don't have to ban you two from the playground....jay?"
jay: "...................fine"
<extends hand>
caul: "................fine"
<unzips jeans and puts his erect penis in jays hand>
<jay and caul make out>
---The End---
----------------------------
hahahahaha... you are one funny drug.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:32:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jason M. Greening?
Hello?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:07:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Squee.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:06:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jaypig, I apologize for making fun of you.
Truce?
Submitted by cocaine (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:05:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:02:34 (#)
Ranking: -2
No dipshit, translation is I'm sick and tired of expending energy on some cocksucking assfelcher who has nothing better to do with his day in whatever fucking office he's blowing people in that give me shit to make his hollow fucking existance seem worthwhile.
---
then stop, jay. stop.
stop expending your energy here and start expending it at the gym.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:04:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would drink that.
PS I got a mental image of Jay shedding a tear into it that sent me into fits of laughter.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:02:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No dipshit, translation is I'm sick and tired of expending energy on some cocksucking assfelcher who has nothing better to do with his day in whatever fucking office he's blowing people in that give me shit to make his hollow fucking existance seem worthwhile.
Take a fucking look Caul at the people who are actually siding with you.
Stok. Paint_it_black. UnderOathMeal.
Everyone who agrees with you is a fucking mongoliod who couldn't form a coherent thought unless it was written on a 3x5 card for them.
And yet you think that because you come up with the same shitty insults as these diaper-wearing mouth breathers you're better than me.
Whatever, dude.
Think what you want.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-13 13:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hahahah
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:55:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i just threw up in my mouth a little.
Submitted by cocaine (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:55:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
jesus christ boys...it's like reading an excerpt from a script born in third grade.
the both of you.
caul: "jay is a fat retard"
jay: "caul is a gay french-canadian"
caul: "jay is fat and unoriginal"
jay: "caul like dicks in his mouth"
caul: "nuh-uh"
jay: "yeah-huh"
caul: "fuck you fatty"
<shoves jay>
<jay doesn't move>
jay: "you're only touching me because you're gay and want to feel the warm skin of another man"
caul: "you didn't move because your 800 pound body is now grafted to the earth."
jay: "..............i'm telling...........BAAAAAAAAAARRRRRT!!!"
bart: "stop it you two"
jay: "but he <sniff> won't stop calling me fat"
bart: "stop calling him fat, caul"
caul: "but all he does is make alters and eat all day...i'm really scared for his health and, in order to motivate him to lose weight, i'm calling him fat."
bart: "that never works, you know"
caul: "i know"
bart: "so can you two please shake hands and be friends so that i don't have to ban you two from the playground....jay?"
jay: "...................fine"
<extends hand>
caul: "................fine"
<unzips jeans and puts his erect penis in jays hand>
<jay and caul make out>
---The End---
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:44:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
translation: I surrender
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:40:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
But, to quote another one of our looooooooong glorious conversations, the fucking sky is blue, Caul. Find someone else to argue with, k?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:34:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Caul, I was asked in a chat room with 5 people who loathe me.
Even you with a dick in all holes aren't dumb enough to actually fall into that kind of trap.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-13 12:25:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 10:47:54 (#)
Ranking: -2
Again, you're repetitive BS isn't worth the effort to actually respond to on any sort of scale worth trying at.
===
when you were asked to make an effort to PWN me, you couldn't deliver. this is a lame excuse to justify your rampant cerebral inertia.
face it jay, you're a fat fucking retard.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-09-13 11:35:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:31:05 (#)
Ranking: 0
ahahahaha
If you've read a fair amount of my reviews, you'd know that I'm a college student in my 20s. The kid in my "camwhore" looks like he's about 14. That photo has served as some quality Shlongy bait, though.
My real camwhore is here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/89674
---------------------
You have like 5 fake camwhores, I don't care which is the real one because they all look like shit. I am guessing none of them is real because you are probably even worse looking in person.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-09-13 10:51:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that actually made me gag a little. and it looks more like a bacon margarita.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-13 10:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Again Caul, you're missing the big picture because someone is challenging your machismo.
Call me fat all ya want, insult my job all ya want, because it's obvious you can't come up with anything else.
And until you CAN come up with anything else, I'll keep calling your a faggy frnchie.
Why?
Again, you're repetitive BS isn't worth the effort to actually respond to on any sort of scale worth trying at.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-09-13 00:11:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Amusing sight gag.
Or site gag.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-13 00:07:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:15:23 (#)
Ranking: -2
Wait, so even though you admittedly sucked dick and LOVED it...
And the fact you look like you spend more time in the bathroom prefecting your hair than Rapunzel...
And the fact that your face in EVERY PICTURE YOU TAKE just screams "Mmmmmmmmm yeah, lemme getchu outta those chino's boy"
BUt no.
nooooooooononononononononono
Of COURSE you're not gay.
Just REALLY REALLY REALLY REAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY fucking bi.
Sure thing, hoss.
Sure thing.
===
The insults themselves are already harmless, do you even look at how you formulate them?
Your blatant mental retardation is showing again, Jay.
Submitted by OneCheapGeek (user info) at 2006-09-13 00:03:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I like how Jay's ONLY insault for caul goes something like this...
HAR HAR CAUL SUCKED COCK <fat ripples>
CAUL IS TEH GHEYNEESITUDEITY <pokes belly and giggles>
COCK COCK COCK IN CAULCAUL'S MOUF <somuchisridingonyourtires>
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Right. That post was believeable and well-done. Fucktard.
Name caller. . . . . . . . . .
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:31:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ahahahaha
If you've read a fair amount of my reviews, you'd know that I'm a college student in my 20s. The kid in my "camwhore" looks like he's about 14. That photo has served as some quality Shlongy bait, though.
My real camwhore is here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/89674
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:18:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by paint_it_black (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:15:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:39:08 (#)
Ranking: 1
No, you don't.
Although I'm 100% sure that thousands more people - probably millions - actually hate you, than they do me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:24:05 (#)
Ranking: -2
It's official Shlongy, I have more hate posts than you...
Christ they're pathetic.
_________________________---
Yeah...
hers the thing :
shlongy knows hes pathetic, jaypig thinks hes not
___________
PIB, stop calling names, you fucking moron. :)
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:15:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Caul, WHAT did you do to your little cousin? Hmmmm?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:15:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wait, so even though you admittedly sucked dick and LOVED it...
And the fact you look like you spend more time in the bathroom prefecting your hair than Rapunzel...
And the fact that your face in EVERY PICTURE YOU TAKE just screams "Mmmmmmmmm yeah, lemme getchu outta those chino's boy"
BUt no.
nooooooooononononononononono
Of COURSE you're not gay.
Just REALLY REALLY REALLY REAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY fucking bi.
Sure thing, hoss.
Sure thing.
Submitted by paint_it_black (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:15:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:39:08 (#)
Ranking: 1
No, you don't.
Although I'm 100% sure that thousands more people - probably millions - actually hate you, than they do me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:24:05 (#)
Ranking: -2
It's official Shlongy, I have more hate posts than you...
Christ they're pathetic.
_________________________---
Yeah...
hers the thing :
shlongy knows hes pathetic, jaypig thinks hes not
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 23:08:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:20:20 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:00:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:02:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
i think the sad part is that you consider chatting on the Internet 'meeting' someone?
----
Did I say anything about chatting with people online, there?
I'm talking all of Quebec, LaFlamer.
And probably most of Saskatchewan, too.
===
you said most people Jay. QC and SK aren't most people. And in order to make that assertion, you'd have to meet me in person, now do you?
Jesus Jay, don't you ever get tired of being walked through conversations?
------
We must be leading each other down the same conversational path, Frenchie, because I said "MOST PEOPLE WHO'VE HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF MEETING YOU not MOST PEOPLE.
===
SK is nowhere near QC, Jay, how could they meet me? And again, in order to call someone the gayest fuck ever, you'd have to meet this someone in person because let's face it, gayness is not as transparent on pictures as let's say, your morbid obesity or down syndrome. Thus my comment about you thinking that Internet chat is meeting people.
I'm kinda tired of holding your hand through every single sentence of your own language. It feels like spoon feeding my little cousin.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:58:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Glass Houses, doughboy, glass houses
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:49:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wiggles, you were the tag-along kid in high school who jumped on the bandwagon,
weren't you? You called the other kids fat or stupid because the other assholes started it.
Have you ever had an original thought in your life? I doubt it.
I would like to meet you in person, so I could find the weak point in your physical
self that could be exploited. Oh yes, there is one.
Your lack of intellect is not a point of contention; you show it here in every post
and review. . .
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-09-12 20:18:56 (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88801
How many of these do you drink a day?
------------
Wait, THAT'S the fuck who gives me shit?
Christ boy, at least I'm down to ONE chin.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 21:20:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:00:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:02:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
i think the sad part is that you consider chatting on the Internet 'meeting' someone?
----
Did I say anything about chatting with people online, there?
I'm talking all of Quebec, LaFlamer.
And probably most of Saskatchewan, too.
===
you said most people Jay. QC and SK aren't most people. And in order to make that assertion, you'd have to meet me in person, now do you?
Jesus Jay, don't you ever get tired of being walked through conversations?
------
We must be leading each other down the same conversational path, Frenchie, because I said "MOST PEOPLE WHO'VE HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF MEETING YOU not MOST PEOPLE.
Swear to God, I know a cock in your mouth keeps you from speaking the language correctly, but I never knew it kept your from reading too...
Well, wait... I guess the balls slapping you in the eyes could account for that...
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-09-12 20:25:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
IndOWNED.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-09-12 20:18:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88801
How many of these do you drink a day?
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:49:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
MMMMM, Bacon.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:14:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:21:53 (#)
Ranking: 1
Almost funny...except I hate Wiggles.
===========
Very funny, but i feel the same way about the second part...
Great reviews...
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:10:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck that cunt's annoying.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:00:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:02:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
i think the sad part is that you consider chatting on the Internet 'meeting' someone?
----
Did I say anything about chatting with people online, there?
I'm talking all of Quebec, LaFlamer.
And probably most of Saskatchewan, too.
===
you said most people Jay. QC and SK aren't most people. And in order to make that assertion, you'd have to meet me in person, now do you?
Jesus Jay, don't you ever get tired of being walked through conversations?
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:33:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I laughed.
Submitted by The_Mighty_Badger (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:20:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Would have been funnier if it was a picture of you drinking martini from a pig's crotch.
Submitted by Deidra (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:10:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Is it thursday?
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:07:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the hell is that supposed to be, bacon?
Nice replies.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:02:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i think the sad part is that you consider chatting on the Internet 'meeting' someone?
----
Did I say anything about chatting with people online, there?
I'm talking all of Quebec, LaFlamer.
And probably most of Saskatchewan, too.
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-09-12 18:00:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:48:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:45:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
You're ego needs someone you think is a lesser person than you to insult so that at the end of the day you can gloat to yourself that you're just OOZING "manliness".
The sad part is, you need to do that to keep hidden from yourself that you're one of the gayest fucks most people have ever had the displeasure of meeting
===
i think the sad part is that you consider chatting on the Internet 'meeting' someone?
nobody needs a fucking loser like yourself to feel better, jay.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:45:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're ego needs someone you think is a lesser person than you to insult so that at the end of the day you can gloat to yourself that you're just OOZING "manliness".
The sad part is, you need to do that to keep hidden from yourself that you're one of the gayest fucks most people have ever had the displeasure of meeting.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:43:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my ego is fine. it doesn't need an Internet ass clown like you.
you are merely entertainment, mon cochon.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No you won't.
Your ego won't let you.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:39:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:10:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:57:49 (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate sad quickies.
==
they must occur a lot when you fuck whores
______________
snap
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:34:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:21:36 (#)
Ranking: -2
Should I expect any different from Caul?
Even when I leave the faggy frog alone he can't help but take a swipe.
===
yeah, you're right.
you're an easy target.
I'll try to stop.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:21:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Should I expect any different from Caul?
Even when I leave the faggy frog alone he can't help but take a swipe.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:16:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:10:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:57:49 (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate sad quickies.
==
they must occur a lot when you fuck whores
======
lol... now, THAT is good !!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:10:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:57:49 (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate sad quickies.
==
they must occur a lot when you fuck whores
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-09-12 17:00:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lol
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:57:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I will give you this, Shlongy. At least your hate posts are thought out and semi-decently done.
Every one of mine is a sad quickie.
I hate sad quickies.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:41:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:21:53 (#)
Ranking: 1
Almost funny...except I hate Wiggles.
------
hey, that's right - Wiggles, are you allowed to post that, being a vegantarian and all that shit????
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:39:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Everything tastes better with bacon on it"
I actually had a t-shirt that said that - I won it in a bacon contest. RLY!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:39:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No, you don't.
Although I'm 100% sure that thousands more people - probably millions - actually hate you, than they do me.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:24:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It's official Shlongy, I have more hate posts than you...
Christ they're pathetic.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:23:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you're on a diet, use canola oil instead of chicken fat.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:21:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Almost funny...except I hate Wiggles.
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:19:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hhahahahaha
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:19:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-09-12 16:18:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Get it?
He's fat.