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Nice Try You Filthy Whore! (992 hits)

Category: None
Labels: untruth

Rating: 1.38 on 29 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Snark << snarkk.at.gmail.com (View user info) at 2006-09-15 16:05:24 EDT




GOD! You're such a dumb bitch!

I see you sitting there, pretending to be all coy, while really you're hoping I'll just walk up and plant a big slobbery kiss on you.

You know how I know you want it? You shaved your mustache today and you put on that bright orange lipstick that you know drives me crazy, and you keep talking about your date with 'Steve' from accounting loud enough for me to hear.

You wanna play games? That what you wanna do?

Bring it Whore!

This ain't a Windows 95 T-shirt I'm wearing baby. It's armor you big sweaty sexy vixen. It's impervious to your big sexy sweaty vixen ways.

That's right, shoot me another sneer. I know a love growl when I see one. You can't hide nothing from me. The Snark sees all: Every wonderful roll hanging under your shirt. Every bit of breakfast stuck to your shiny chin.

I know how you think. My Snarky sense is ringing like a dinner bell and you're the main course.

If I wan an Inuit, you'd be my handful of warm blubber.

Go ahead, turn your back to me. I can see the thick black hairs on the back of you neck sticking up. I can see your moles swelling. I know you can feel me looking. I see the way you tremble. You're breasts are heaving aren't they? They're sweating in anticipation of my skills.

I can feel the lust emanate off you as strong as that odor. What is that? McDonalds? Wendy's?

Taco Bell? It's Taco Bell isn't it? OH YOU FUCKING SLUT!

That's just plain low. That's just dirty pool!

You think just cuz you're sexy and you smell like Tiawana at noon, you can tease me all you want don't you? You think I'm nothing but a bit of cookie dough for you to kneed and shape as you see fit?

WRONG!

I'm gonna wait. I'm gonna play it cool. You're going to come crawling to me and beg me to do you in ways that would give Paris Hilton night terrors.

Yeah baby. I see you.

I see your love for me and I love you too.

Just say it.

Three simple words.

Do it by noon or I'm gonna kill you with a fork.



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User Reviews


Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-16 02:22:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by Alter (user info) at 2007-09-26 22:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No, Comment.


Submitted by earth_collapse (user info) at 2006-09-18 05:11:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2006-09-16 03:12:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2






i hate you?

Submitted by Benny (user info) at 2006-09-16 02:20:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I don't know...I hear Steve from accounting is quite the ladies man. You might have some real competition there.
Accountant = Sex God!

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-16 02:01:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:58:46 (#)
Ranking: 2

....Interesting day at work?

This cracked me up.

==================

Nah, just bored.

Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:58:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

....Interesting day at work?

This cracked me up.

Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:56:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

lol funny


Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:36:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

shweeeeee

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:33:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Delta Burke??? YOU FUCKING LUCKY BASTARD!!!

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:09:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

scourge is confused

Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:00:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

RAD!

Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-09-15 18:44:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

"If I wan an Inuit, you'd be my handful of warm blubber."

Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-09-15 17:22:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-09-15 17:04:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 17:00:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Ding Ding Baby.

Ding Ding.

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:59:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Oh..Snark ring my bell..that's it..just like that. EXTRA SOUR CREAM PLEASE..DAMMIT THAT'S TOO MANY WORDS

HEY JONNYX were you talking about this, mayhaps?

http://www.ubersite.com/m/93001

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:39:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

If you want to be REAL old school, you _could_ call it Tia Juana.
Which means 'Aunt Jane'.
Who sells maryjane.
Which comes from....wait for it, wait for it...

Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I could either love this or hate it, depending on my mood.






Right now i'm neutral.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:29:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Either or ... or even if you just said "Bell." or even "B." i'd be happy with "B.":

DAMMIT! You know you want to!




Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:28:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

God now I want Taco Bell.


You asshole.

*cough*grueberfest06*cough*

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:27:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

So..the three words..

Yo quiero TacoBell? Taco Bell could be considered one word, right?

I want to make sure I get this right.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:17:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:10:43 (#)
Ranking: 2

He likes me..HE REALLY LIKES ME!


=====================

You have until noon, July 2015

Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:16:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0



Submitted by Uberjunkie (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Hahaha!

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:13:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:12:17 (#)
Ranking: 1

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tijuana


========================

Ahahahaha WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Submitted by WildcatMcGee (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:12:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tijuana

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:12:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I didn't know how else to tell you.



Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-09-15 16:10:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

He likes me..HE REALLY LIKES ME!


Oh everything's cruel according to you. Keeping him chained us in the
backyard is cruel. Pulling his tail is cruel. Yelling in his ears is
cruel. Everything is cruel. So excuse me if I'm cruel.

-- Homer Simpson
Bart Gets An Elephant