The 50 Best Posts of All Time (2060 hits)
Category: Computers & InternetRating: 0.22 on 46 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Maltese (View user info) at 2006-09-15 19:15:55 EDT
Me: Gentlemen, behold! Here is a list of the 50 best posts of all time.
Fat Tony: Yessssssssss massssssssssterrrrrr... but what if it is just a mere "Ha ha, emu"?
Me: ... *pimp slaps* Silly bitch nigga, this is the real deal! So shaddap you face!
Fat Tony: Yessssssssss massssssssssterrrrrr... *emo tears*
Me: Now, as I was saying... gentlemen, BEHOLD! The 50 greatest Uber posts of all time!!!!!
50) The Interrogation of Ronald McDonald - by Jack McCallum (http://www.ubersite.com/m/41874)
Jack McCallum writes something funny for once, and hits it out of the motherfucking park.
49) Anal Leakage - by Alex DeWitt (http://www.ubersite.com/m/85129)
Alex takes a diarrhea-drenched journey by way of Vitamin B5 overdosage.
48) Damn, That Bitch Could Blow (NSFW) - by The Cyst Master (http://www.ubersite.com/m/86576)
Cyst totally destroys a girl. But whom killed her, and why?
47) The Art of Cum Gargling - by Zod (http://www.ubersite.com/m/25217)
Zod gets his shit ruined when a girl gargles his steady stream of potential Zod Jrs.
46) The Life and Death of a Conspiracy Theorist - by forthewin (http://www.ubersite.com/m/91913)
S. William "Dispositioner of Jonukah" Moore's masterpiece of biting satire directed at electrictoothsyndrome.
45) Just Who Is George Mason and Why Is A School Named After Him? - by stevie_says (http://www.ubersite.com/m/86022)
Stevie's view on one of America's founding fathers.
44) MY Desktop! (NSFW) - by professorfuckface (http://www.ubersite.com/m/76609)
PFF's desktop, just as I imagined it to look.
43) I'm out of juice - by Apollo (http://www.ubersite.com/m/32446)
Apollo's take on Maddox.
42) Revenge Is Best Served Cold, But What's Colder Than Cold? Ice Cold - by Sideburns (http://www.ubersite.com/m/44828)
Sideburns gets revenge on the douche who stole his girlfriend.
41) Reverse - by Matt Maiorano (http://www.ubersite.com/m/28994)
Matt's backwards tale of death.
40) Why You Should Never Have Romantic Inclinations Toward Your Grandmother - by Amusediniraq (http://www.ubersite.com/m/24726)
Amusediniraq's tale of Oedipus plus one generation.
39) This Man Saved Your Life - by CystMaster (http://www.ubersite.com/m/37531)
The tale of awesomeness that is John Perry. Oh snap! Cowabunga dudes!
38) Why You Should Not Vomit On Your Job Interviewer - by SG The Platypus Master (http://www.ubersite.com/m/72171)
SG blows chunks upon his job interviewer like never before.
37) I Woke Up Next To An Old Man This Morning - by comicbookguy (http://www.ubersite.com/m/52873)
It's not what you think it is, trust me.
36) No Porn... (NSFW) - by The Cyst Master (http://www.ubersite.com/m/77733)
The Cyst Master suggests eight things to do if zakalwe doesn't post. (WITH PICTURES!!!)
35) The Story of Tubgirl - by Saxon (http://www.ubersite.com/m/78553)
Saxon's explanation of how Tubgirl came to be.
34) You Don't Fucking Cum on Sunshine Bear! - by AllyJeans (http://www.ubersite.com/m/72921)
A tale of how Ally's teddy bear lost his innocence.
33) Microsoft Paint: Eleven Feet of Awesome - by Gibberish (http://www.ubersite.com/m/47215)
One of Gibberish's countless masterpieces. Need I say more?
32) Fat Fucking Adventure 2: Electro Boogaloo - by Degreeless_Capibara
A Flash game chronicling Electro's retarded adventures. (NOTE: Degreeless_Capibara made the Flash, but asked Rad to post it for him because he was banned at the time. Therefore, I give credit to Degreeless.)
31) should i tell my parents that i got fuked? (also is sex supposed to hurt this bad?) - by immygirl1 (http://www.ubersite.com/m/52393)
A masterpiece from one of the greatest alters of all time. Make sure to read the reviews as well.
30) I was accosted by a giant red Skittle - by Method (http://www.ubersite.com/m/48886)
How Method spent his Halloween.
29) King of Summer - by Nath (http://www.ubersite.com/m/90771)
It bring back so many memories of me playing with my friends in summer, but with a twist...
28) Political Correctness - by LSD420 (http://www.ubersite.com/m/89743)
The ultimate in satirization of political correctness.
27) A BOSH Uber ADVENTURE!!!!! - by DudethatsBOSH (http://www.ubersite.com/m/75679)
The ultimate BOSH post ever.
26) Shaquille O'Neal could bash you. - by Enraged Baboon (http://www.ubersite.com/m/25950)
Shaquille O'Neal could bash you if he so fucking wanted to.
25) I never saw a man... - by MaesterMeat (http://ubersite.com/m/7054)
Maester's classic tale of his badass dad - and his bad ass.
24) I Don't Want To Relocate Him, I Want To Kill The Motherfucker - by stevie_says (http://www.ubersite.com/m/90971)
Stevie attempts to get his next-door neighbor exterminated.
23) My J-Date Debacle - by JMG114 (http://www.ubersite.com/m/29780)
My personal favorite of the J-Date series, in which the date turns out to be a 13-year-old girl with... problems.
22) The Santa Claus Dildo Adventures - by Zoidberg (http://www.ubersite.com/m/54469)
The name says it all. Or not.
21) I Popped a Boner on a Nude Beach with a Chinese Stripper and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt - by Rizzo (http://www.ubersite.com/m/38540)
Rizzo's adventures at a New Jersey nude beach.
20) my-friend-John-what-kicked-all-ass - by skrapmetal (http://www.ubersite.com/m/79683)
Skrapmetal's moving tribute to his friend John, who kicked all ass.
19) Warning! Exploding Underpants - by Saxon (http://www.ubersite.com/m/57811)
Saxon's tale of accidental sweet revenge.
18) Adventures in Kids' Entertainment: The Passion of the Honey Bear - by JMG (http://www.ubersite.com/m/48127)
JMG goes to a party and gets laid, but not in the way you'd expect...
17) Shenanigan Pie: The Studio Session - by CaptainThorns (http://www.ubersite.com/m/79919)
Captain Thorns shows off his vocal talents on Orgasmatron's awesomeness.
16) Part of the Problem (NSFW) - by The Cyst Master (http://www.ubersite.com/m/90042)
The Cyst Master attempts to explain Electro's unparalleled autism.
15) re 16 y/olds - by Wazza (http://www.ubersite.com/m/44213)
A simple discombobulated sentence that changed Uber forever. What the hell man.
14) The Perils of Sex in a Toilet Stall - by comicbookguy (http://www.ubersite.com/m/56934)
Comicbookguy's adventure involving top floors and back doors.
13) Bastard Buzzard Brutalizes Brits - by Habeeb (http://www.ubersite.com/m/35708)
Words...cannot...describe... just go see for yourself.
12) A Totally NSFW Visit To The Hospital (NSFW) - by The Cyst Master (http://www.ubersite.com/m/85976)
Shitfuck and The Cyst Master visit the pediatrics ward. But who cares!? Show us your butt hole!
11) im gointo waste your anus with a brick - by DisturbedNakedChild (http://www.ubersite.com/m/33452)
DisturbedNakedChild contemplates his vengeance on America's Funniest Home Videos' studio audience.
10) How an Adult Board Game Got Me Into The Worst Trouble I've Ever Been In - by Sideburns (http://www.ubersite.com/m/90262)
A nine-year-old Sideburns and his friends unwittingly engage in sex play.
9) How to pick up chicks in grocery stores - by comicbookguy (http://www.ubersite.com/m/58423)
The title speaks for itself. Also, it got a +2 streak on 111 reviews until Rad killed it.
8) Adventures in Loss Prevention: "Bobby, Nooooooo!" - by Jack11058 (http://www.ubersite.com/m/68161)
A kid gets his shit ruined by Jack after stealing... well, just read it.
7) Losing My Virginity: The Fall of Righty - by Wardy (http://www.ubersite.com/m/84320)
Wardy's tale of conversation, masturbation, and penetration is 100% awesome and should be on B@W. Blows "If I cum now" out of the water.
6) Taco bell sour cream is made of semen - by Mr. Tinkle (http://www.ubersite.com/m/73068)
Mr. Tinkle impersonates comicbookguy. The result: the undisputed king of shit posts.
5) I Waxed Strawberry Shortcake's Bikini Line And Gave The Guy From Operation an STD - by Pentameter (http://www.ubersite.com/m/66141)
Pentameter's crowning achievement, concerning his hilarious childhood antics.
4) I was raped by my dyson - by Snarf (http://www.ubersite.com/m/64735)
Snarf gets anally sodomized by his vacuum cleaner and lives to tell the tale.
3) For I Have Tasted the Fruit - by Razor (http://www.ubersite.com/m/32650)
A fiction masterpiece, involving a serial killer slowly hunting down victims.
2) Killing a Small Child with my Ass - by j0andre1 (http://www.ubersite.com/m/34838)
The first Uber post I ever read, and it still has me in stitches. Jon's tale of expired macaroni and the havoc that ensues.
1) Too Late - by Razor (http://www.ubersite.com/m/32030)
A post about how one simple second in time can alter a life for good. Simply the best thing ever written on this site.
And there you have it. Just try to not masturbate TOO furiously, m'kay?
In conclusion...
CAT JIHAD!!!1! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA!!! MEOW MEOW ALLAHU ACKBAR MEOW MEOW AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
User Reviews
Submitted by NecroBlanca1 (user info) at 2006-09-17 01:33:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93154
entered stok madness
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-16 21:20:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This post gets points in a very cheap way.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-09-16 20:53:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-16 10:02:33 (#)
Ranking: -2
Bullshit.
______________
As usual, Shlongy sums it up in a word.
You missed many of the better authors, such as Bickerstaff.
Submitted by Amy (user info) at 2006-09-16 20:11:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF? where are the posts of...filthy, loki or lisa's?.
you just haven't been around that much
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-09-16 11:14:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bosh fan
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-09-16 11:00:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/59423
Submitted by littledan (user info) at 2006-09-16 10:59:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If I could give you 1000 Plus twos for this, I would. 47 of these posts are also some of my favorites, and I had forgotten about a few of them, until I read them again. Thank you.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-09-16 10:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Bullshit.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-09-16 09:45:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I like how nobody has commented on seeing LSM pop in. GLALL's great and all, but goddamn, people!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-09-16 09:43:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
MEH
PS squattail made all the Electro-related flashes.
STFU n00b
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-09-16 08:30:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Electro Boogaloo should be number one. That Habeeb one with the buzzards is fucking hilarious.
Submitted by NecroBlanca1 (user info) at 2006-09-16 08:22:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93137
for you douchebag
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-09-16 08:13:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oooh the controversy!
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-09-16 08:09:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This list is probably the best top post list ever
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-09-16 03:24:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-09-16 01:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-09-15 22:41:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
<Ctrl+F>
?"Shenanigan Pie"
FOUND
Auto+2!!!!
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-09-15 22:20:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Any of my posts could be #1 with ease. I'm that good.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-09-15 22:15:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Makes sense to me.
Submitted by kimberly (user info) at 2006-09-15 22:15:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked re-reading a lot of those.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-09-15 21:55:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-15 21:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
are you one of these morons who not only have horrible English, which isn't a big deal, but gets mad at people who have good English and calls them stupid?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-09-15 21:23:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who the fuck are you again?
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-09-15 21:00:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-09-15 21:00:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:19:29 (#)
Ranking: 1
Axolotl Jr.
^^^^^^^^^^
Word
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:59:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For showing me posts I'd never read.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:47:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wow. i'm number 7 on your list.
i'm so happy right now.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:34:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Every time I see one of these lists, I want to tell the creator "Hey, you can fondle our balls in the reviews all you want, but posts like this are unnecessary. Please do something more constructive with your time here at Ubersite."
But I usually don't, because I'm on the list and I can't help but feeling it would be rude.
Thanks for leaving me off this list, so I can tell you to fuck off without guilt. =)
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:31:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i guess everyone is entitled to their opinion
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:10:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Honored.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-09-15 20:01:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
**weeps**
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:56:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I fail to agree on some of these.
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:54:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Sorry, kid. You need 100 000 hits to get to do something like this, but more importantly... this list isn't very good.
Submitted by laika (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:39:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Ill give you a 1 for effort, but apparently we have very different tastes in what makes a good post.
If I were making a list of top 50, I dont think more than 5 of these would make it, and
some would be closer to the bottom 50 than top.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:38:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
1) I see now Wazza at #1
2) Hove you been around long enough to really be able to do this?
3) What, no stok posts?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:34:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:28:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
my list contains mostly lojope and anything on how to cure athlete's foot.
====================
GLALL siting auto +2!!
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:31:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*returns*
Of course I read the filename, thus why I left.
*leaves again*
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:29:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:27:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Sigh... I never make any of these.
*goes away*
----
You DID... read the filename. I wouldn't forget about you, darko.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:28:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
LSD hasn't posted anything that deserves to be on this list, much less so far up on it.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:28:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my list contains mostly lojope and anything on how to cure athlete's foot.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:27:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sigh... I never make any of these.
*goes away*
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:27:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not my best, but it'll do.
Submitted by lowsodiummonkey (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:23:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/13652
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you are annoying
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Axolotl Jr.
Submitted by bokinsmowls (user info) at 2006-09-15 19:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesomeness.