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Late nigh television can bring great disappointment. (247 hits)

Category: General

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Submitted by Wildcat (View user info) at 2006-09-29 09:10:44 EDT


"Fuck that!" I thought, flipping the TV station past the Lifetime channel.

Click. Click. Click. "Huh?"

"We're here today to talk about the power of God..........."

This piqued my interest. Not the message they were trying to get across, not the late night commercials in between, but the host and his guest.

Before me on the television sat two rather large men on two green couches. One held a bible in his left hand, the other looked to be a little impatient and trying too hard to look trendy.

They were trying to spread the word of God through their personal anecdotes, though. Something I always find to be absolutely annoying. Very similar to several law classes I've taken that were filled with people arguing facts of law with stories of their 'uncle's girlfriend's son' getting away with whatever facet of law we were there to discuss. I hate personal anecdotes in cases like these.

However, the personal anecdotes were a little different. They were about drugs, sex, partying, more sex, and more drugs. Very attention grasping to say the least.

I sat for 15 minutes watching this show trying to figure out who I was watching. The impatient man kept calling the host Steve. 'Steve who?', I thought. I've seen these mens' faces tons of times but I couldn't place where.

The impatient man with blonde highlighted hair kept talking and crying about losing his wife and watching his girlfriend die in his arms. It was all so interesting but I couldn't figure out why.

Then it struck me like a fucking brick to the face.

"So, Lex, how has God come to help over the years?", Steve asked.

No. Fucking. Way.

I had to flip to channel before I puked. My mental image of these two men was just shattered. My childhood hero was now a brainwashed late night talk show host for a Christian show. He was now a bible thumper, not a skull crusher. Everything has been ruined.

And so, Steve Borden and Lex Luger continued their indoctrination attempts and I flipped the channel again, happy to be watching another Girls Gone Wild commercial and being in the arms of sacrilege.

stingluger.jpg (13 kB)

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