Grueberfest 06: Easy Kill (837 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Grueberfest
Rating: 1.81 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Anansie (View user info) at 2006-10-03 20:52:24 EDT
"Easy kill," Mac whispered to him when they saw the man round the corner. Whenever they found a particularly promising mark, he'd say that. This time, it looked too easy. For fuck's sake the guy was walking around in a bow-tie and a bowler hat. Who even wore that kind of crap these days?
He was obviously not from this part of town. The people who frequented this area at night wore the darkness like an old, familiar suit, but Bowler Hat seemed twitchy. Nervous. Mac and Tommy pegged him immediately and began to follow. Eventually the dude caught on, or at least seemed to. He glanced over his shoulder a few times, picked up his pace. Didn't matter. Mac and Tommy stayed close. They didn't give a shit if the guy saw them or not. Cops didn't frequent this area. Frankly, Tommy had the distinct impression that the cops could give two shits if this place sunk into a hole and disappeared forever. The people that lived here were smart enough not to look out their windows at night. Or maybe apathetic enough. Tom had always figured it was a mixture both. The reasons didn't really matter to him. All that mattered was that it made his job easier.
There was a slight drizzle of rain that would have been inconsequential had it not been so cold. Tommy and Mac hunkered over in their jackets. Bowler Hat didn't seem to mind. His posture was erect and his motion could have been called fluid, if it weren't for the nervous ticks. Something pulled at the back of Tommy's mind, but he ignored it and concentrated on his mark.
Black hulking beasts posing as tenements hugged the streets. Some people thought that at night the buildings looked spooky. Tommy always thought they looked sad. They were desperate. They would be torn down soon, and it was as if they knew it, clinging to the street the way a dying man might cling to his hospital blanket. Nobody cared about this place. Nobody from the outside. So Tom didn't feel guilty about robbing them. The place was an abandoned battlefield, and flickering streetlights stood sentry like old soldiers. Even if someone was lucky enough to find a payphone here, chances were that it wouldn't be operating. When you stumbled into Hollow End, you might as well have stumbled into another fucking dimension. God knows how Bowler Hat got here, but Tom knew he wouldn't come back after tonight.
The man in the bowler hat reached a point where he'd either have to turn around and face his predators, or duck into one of two alleys. It wasn't an easy choice, and Tom didn't envy him. Not that he gave a shit about the bastard. Preying on stupidity was too easy, and Tom generally felt nothing but contempt for his victims.
Bowler Hat seemed indecisive. He looked back and forth. He took a few steps toward the left before making a mad dash into the alley on the right. Tom heard a frightened grunt, and the slap slap slap of the Bowler Hat's oxfords pounding the wet pavement. Good. Stupid, but good. Someday Tom was going to write a book on how to avoid a mugging. It doesn't matter how abandoned the neighborhood is, your chances are always better in the street than in an alley. You'd think most people already knew that, but he'd seen enough to know that wasn't always the case.
The alley was especially long, situated between an unfenced meat plant and a condemned apartment building. The meager light from the street glinted off the wet brick and pavement near the entrance. They could see the man's shadowy figure, still running. He had already made it halfway down. What in the blue fuck? That something pulled insistently at his mind again, like a kid tugging on the hem of his shirt. How the hell did Bowler Hat make it that far, that fast?
"The fuck man, are you comin?" Mac called over his shoulder.
Tommy ran after him. "Easy kill, my ass," he panted.
There was a strange thickness in the air. It crowded Tom as soon as he ran into the alley. He was already out of breath, though he'd just started running. Bowler Hat should have already made it to the end, as fast as he was going. He and Mac should have gotten farther themselves. Tommy didn't know if Mac felt weird too and was just concentrating on the mark, or if he felt nothing at all. When his feet hit the pavement, it was like running on a trampoline. Unsteady like that. Elastic almost. But he wasn't bouncing. That thing in the back of his head wasn't just pulling now, it was heaving and screaming. He'd never really be able to explain to himself afterward why he'd kept running. But he did.
And then Bowler Hat stopped. Just like that. He had been running full tilt toward the end of the alley, faster than Tommy could have believed possible, but he just stopped. No slowing down. No stumbling a few more steps. Just a dead stop, as if he had no momentum going at all.
Tommy slowed down, but Mac kept running. He had taken out his gun, and was yelling and waving it at the man.
"Gimme your wallet you fucking muppet."
Bowler Hat turned around, and for some reason, though everything else this far down in the alley was shrouded in darkness, Tommy could see him as clear as if he were standing in daylight. Bowler Hat suddenly didn't look nervous at all. Not a bit twitchy. In fact, he smiled. In fact, once he started smiling, he didn't stop. His lips pulled back to reveal a set of perfectly straight, perfectly white, teeth. The smile spread, past his cheeks, all the way back to his ears. It pulled and pulled.
Tommy was frozen in place. He had always heard of being so scared you couldn't move, but never believed it was possible.
Mac had stopped as well. He was only about three feet from the man. Bowler Hat removed the hat, and tossed it at Mac. It landed on his gun.
The smile pulled harder on the man's lips. They began to fold upward, ripping at the groove above his upper lip. Blood began to pour down his neck and on to his collar, soaking his shirt and his bow tie. His eyes were merry.
Bowler Hat, who was no longer Bowler Hat but Peeling Face, began to heave and lurch. His teeth parted, and his smile turned in to a gaping yawn. The whole time his flesh was peeling outward, away from the mouth, like a rotting orange. His torso pulsed, and bulges appeared. His throat began to swell. Something was coming up, and with it rose a stink. Tommy couldn't put his finger on the smell, but it reminded him of musty libraries and dank cellars. It reminded him of his grandfather, in the old man's last weeks of life. It smelled like death.
Blood spurted from the gaping hole where the man's mouth used to be. A whiteness appeared, shining and round. It pushed itself forward, out of the man's mouth. Out the creature poured, first the head, then strangely flattened shoulders, then a torso, then legs. Peeling Face crumpled like the empty sack of skin that he was. The creature in front of him seemed to be folded inward, its body all strange angles and curves. It crouched and pulsed on the ground for a moment that stretched into infinity. Then it unfolded. Reverse origami.
It stood. The first thing Tom thought was that it looked like the man from "The Scream." Munch. That was what Tom would later start calling it. But not exactly. That guy was creepy sure, but Munch... Munch was thin. He was pale. And he was long. It was hard for Tom to put into words what he meant by that. Munch's face was elongated, and loose. Shit, all of him was.
The creature took a few steps, shaking his arms and legs like an athlete trying to get the kinks out. When he moved, he flowed. He stretched. It was like he was made of silly putty, or pudding. Not like Mister Fantastic or the fucking Plastic Man. He had a certain... quality. There was something wicked and ancient about the way he moved. It was an old evil, of that Tom was certain. He could smell it. It wasn't something that could be described. It was something that could only be felt. Somehow he knew that.
Munch shook the last kinks out of his head, and looked over at Mac. The creature smiled, mouth closed, and for some fucking reason, Mac smiled back. Mac looked at his gun, and tittered. He grabbed the hat off the end of the gun and placed it on his head, and began to dance.
Tom felt his legs begin to come back, and slowly began to back away. Instantly the thing's eyes were upon him. He froze. It shook its head, and smiled at him. This time, it opened its mouth. It was a shark's mouth, full of teeth. They seemed to go all the way back to the throat, row after row, closely locked together like phalanx soldiers.
It looked back at Mac. Mac stopped dancing, and looked at Munch, his eyes bulging. He swallowed a few times, convulsively. He began to beat himself with the butt of the gun. And for some reason, Tommy began to hear circus music in his head. Mac began to dance again, even as his face dissolved under the repeated blows of the gun he kept dancing. Blood poured from his nose, his mouth, his eyes, and yet he did not stop.
Tommy finally had enough. He turned and ran. He heard a wet, slapping sound behind him. The creature's footsteps. He ran harder. The stink rose strong in his nostrils, and he felt a heat right behind him. But he was close. Closer than Mac had been. Just a few more steps.
"Tommy!"
He kept running.
"Tommy, don't leave me!"
Almost there.
"Oh God don't fucking leave me here!"
He willed his burning muscles to keep going and sucked in a breath of clean air as he reached the end of the alley. The stink was gone. The feeling was gone. He turned. The alley was empty. Nothing but rainwater and shadows. What the fuck? Had he been hallucinating? No. No way. It felt way too real. He stepped forward.
Instantly the heaviness came back, and the smell, though not as strong. And there was Munch, kneeling (if you could call it kneeling, it seemed more like the bending of half melted plastic) over Mac. It had taken his jaws in its hands, and pulled them apart. Far apart. Unhinged apart. Mac was trying to scream, but he couldn't, instead he gargled as the thing poured itself into his mouth. Something like blood was shooting out of his ears and nose, but thicker, and clotty, as though it had ground bits of hamburger in it. His arms and legs twitched as it disappeared into him. And then it was gone.
Mac lay on the ground for a few more moments jerking and spewing, before becoming still. Tommy briefly thought of going to him, but it was only a thought. No way in hell would he actually do it. It didn't matter now, because Mac was getting up. He stood, jerked about a bit. His arms and legs flopped uselessly at his sided for a minute before straightening like a pair of jacket sleeves. Except no hands came out the end. And then, he looked at Tommy and spoke.
"Easy kill." He smirked.
Tom jerked backwards, but the last thing that he saw before falling on his ass was the creature turning around and walking toward the other end of the alley.
He wondered why Munch didn't bother killing him after what he had seen. Later, he would think about the abandoned buildings, and the people who never bothered to look out their windows. He would think about how the cops were never around. And he'd think of himself, and how he had preyed on the neighborhood's apathy. Why bother killing some nobody thief in a nobody ghetto in a nobody part of the city? Munch didn't give a shit for the same reason the cops didn't give a shit, for the same reason he himself had never given a shit. When you stumbled into Hollow End, you might as well have stumbled into another fucking dimension.
User Reviews
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-02 04:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice imagery.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-11 10:06:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 YOU HAVE A BAJINER
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-04 22:48:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i meant that to be a one. shit.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-04 22:48:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
at least you didn't forfeit. :)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-04 16:19:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Story Reader scrolled and scrolled, taking in all the words and ideas and finding them exceedingly creepy and engaging. Clicking a few times, he delivered a reply and a score to the woman he'd come to know as The Author, and hoped that she would take off her top for him in thanks.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-04 16:09:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh FUCK yes. The story was good, but I love love loved your imagery, and that made it great.
And as an aside, the man in the bowler man sounds a lot like my description of BooBerry ghost that I left on the hub post last night- BEFORE I read this.
COINCIDENCE, OR SOMETHING MORE?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-04 14:11:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What this compo should be about.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-10-04 13:32:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-10-04 07:58:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
I went to grade school with a kid who could peel his own face off. It was a trick he could only do once. He's dead now.
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Deserves a +2 for this alone. Good story also.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-04 12:00:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Easy +2.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-04 11:17:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Spooky. For some reason the town you described made me think of the area that Alex DeLarge lived in. Filename was damned funny.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-10-04 11:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:56:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicely done.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:43:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aye, that's pretty much what I do. I even steal most of my titles.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:39:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, that's a good idea. I'll try it next time.
You are right about the cookie cutter theme part. Nothing new under the sun, as they say. The best you can usually do these days is take an old idea, brush it off, and try to put your own shine on it.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:17:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:09:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, it wasn't really meant to be anything other than cookie cutter horror anyway.
Although I have to defend the guy saying "easy kill" at the end. Even though this was crap, I still kind of tried to give it an underlying theme, which was that the people who preyed upon apathy and forgotten places/people can just as easily become prey themselves. I can see what you are saying though. It is kind of predictable, although I didn't want him to say it just to be a smarmy smartass.
I can also see what you're saying about the last paragraph, Stagger. Endings have always been difficult for me.
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The only problem is that it's a fairly cookie-cutter morality tale as well as cookie-cutter horror. I did like it though, mostly for the descriptive bits. It's like hearing a song that goes verse-chorus-verse-chorus-bridge-chorus... You know what's gonna happen, but if it's done right then you don't mind waiting for it or even expecting it.
A suggestion... next time you end something, reread the ending and then cut your final paragraph and see if it still works.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-04 08:09:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, it wasn't really meant to be anything other than cookie cutter horror anyway.
Although I have to defend the guy saying "easy kill" at the end. Even though this was crap, I still kind of tried to give it an underlying theme, which was that the people who preyed upon apathy and forgotten places/people can just as easily become prey themselves. I can see what you are saying though. It is kind of predictable, although I didn't want him to say it just to be a smarmy smartass.
I can also see what you're saying about the last paragraph, Stagger. Endings have always been difficult for me.
Bah.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-10-04 07:58:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I went to grade school with a kid who could peel his own face off. It was a trick he could only do once. He's dead now.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-10-04 06:52:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think it needed the last paragraph. Or maybe the last paragraph should've been shorter.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-10-04 04:42:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll agree with your cookie cutter remark as to the ending, I mean was it really neccesary for Munch to say "Easy kill" like that? It was certainly the opposite of bad though.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-10-04 02:45:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cookie cutter? This? In what way?
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-10-04 01:39:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2006-10-04 00:14:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-10-03 23:56:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is pretty good Anansie. The thing that keeps it from being just a "1" is the descriptions. Very nicely described.
I enjoyed it in a cookie cutter sort of way.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-03 23:30:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ewe right gud.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-10-03 22:48:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kind of crap? MORE LIKE TOTALLY CRAP.
I loved this fucking story.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-03 22:29:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I ABSOLUTELY REFUCKINGFUSE to read all that shit!
Well, I did, and I FUCKING LIKED IT!!!!!
:-D
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-10-03 22:16:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good work
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-10-03 21:56:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
jesus craps that was creepy!
I pictured it all, quite well. Very descriptive. :) Good job
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-03 21:24:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93382
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-03 20:52:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, this is kind of crap but I guess it's better than a forfeit.