Lube guzzling ass honker (572 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.85 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Paul Hibbert (View user info) at 2006-10-10 13:03:07 EDT
1. WHAT CURSE WORD DO Y0U USE THE MOST?
Lube guzzling ass honker
2. DO YOU OWN AN IPOD?
No, but I heard once if you do some thing on the internet you get one for free by conning some multi-conglomerate billion dollar organisation that controls earth and ordering something you don't want and getting the ipod for free and then re-turning the goods for a refund but keeping the ipod... it hit my bullshit filter that filters out phrases like "something for nothing" and "free".
3. WHAT PERSON ON YOUR TOP 8 DO YOU TALK TO THE MOST?
Umm.. In real life- Bart, in myspace- Bart. I'm technically gay.
4. WHAT TIME IS Y0UR ALARM CLOCK SET TO?
Eleventy past sixtyteen
5 . DO YOU STILL REMEMBER THE FIRST PERSON YOU KISSED?
On the mouth?
6. Do you wear flip flops when its cold?
Flip flops produce a burning rage like only flimsy rubber footwear can.
7. WOULD Y0U RATHER TAKE THE PICTURE OR BE IN THE PICTURE?
I'd rather hit you with the camera
8. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
I'm not telling you. Can you feel it eating away at you? You wanna know but I'm not gonna tell you. Ha ha ha, I have a secret and you will never know.
10. HAS ANY0NE EVER CALLED YOU LAZY?
11. DO YOU EVER TAKE MEDICATION TO HELP YOU FALL ASLEEP?
Before we continue to answering question 11 can we all please appreciate the irony of my answer to question 10. Genius. Thankyou... Anyway I once took this shitty tablet because my doctor said that my neighbours partying on a wednesday night between the hours of 3am and 6am at random intervals throughout the year shouldn't cause me furious paranoia. That particular set of tablets gave me pins and needles all over my body for 3 days, rendered me incapable of speech and movement and told me to kill my girlfriend.
12. WHAT CD IS CURRENTLY IN YOUR CD PlaYER?
I cut a spicegirls cd in half and a motor head cd and glued them together to see what would happen if you played it. You know to see if it would play a bit of both really quickly and maybe the devil would speak through the stereo like if you played old rock and roll records backwards and get this... my cd player broke.
13. DO YOU PREFER REGULAR OR CHOCOLATE MILK?
bonjella
14. HAS ANYONE TOLD Y0U A SECRET THIS WEEK?
An exception error has occured. Bullshit filter detects bullshit question and has not posted to recipient.
15. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD STARBUCKS?
Weird. Where did question 14 go?
16. CAN YOU WHISTLE?
from the mouth?
17. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
What sex they are.
18. DO YOU THINK PEOPLE TALK AB0UT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK?
Yeah
19. DID YOU WATCH CARTOONS AS A CHILD?
Between the beatings and all the colouring in I did I didn't have time.
22. WHAT MOVIES DO YOU KNOW EVERY LINE TO?
none.
23. DO YOU OWN ANY BAND T-SHIRTS?
Oh do shut up. I'm actually irritating the shit out of myself by answering these questions. How in gods name did I wind up writing any of this?? If my conciousness has degraded enough to allow me to "accidentally" start answering an online poll then what's to stop me "accidentally" smearing shit in my own face? Fan-fucking-tastic:- shitville here I come. What's worse is I'm going to continue this plaid of testicles to the end simply because I'm too neurotic to close the window.
24. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SALAD DRESSING?
I don't dress in salad
25. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?
yeah
26. DO YOU DO YOUR OWN DISHES?
I have a dishwasher fool
27. EVER CRY IN PUBLIC?
Does Mr. T cry? Would you pontificate such nonsense if he granted you an audience? I wouldn't cry if you threw acid in my eye!
28. ARE YOU ON A DESKTOP COMPUTER OR A LAPTOP?
Both. Total nerd.
29. Piercings or tattoos?
Neither. More individual not to nowadays.
30. WHATS THE WEATHER LIKE?
it's like, a part of the eco system dude. Totally.
31. WOULD YOU EVER DATE ANYONE COVERED IN TATTOOS?
Covered? Like that hobo in that documentary that turned himself into a tiger? I'll pass, thanks.
32. WHAT DID YOU DO BEFORE THIS?
I modified the authorative DNS records to point the mx records for a domain at a new IP. Did you really want know that or was that a "filler" question?
33. WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU SLEPT ON THE FLOOR?
Anyone who sleeps on the floor but has an internet connection has their priorities all wrong.
34. HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU NEED TO FUNCTION?
7.577 recurring
36. ARE YOUR DAYS FULL AND FAST PACED?
Hell yeah, did you not read the part about me modifying the authorative DNS server?
37. DO YOU PAY ATTENTION TO THE CALORIES IN THE PACKAGE?
You don't look at the mantle piece when you're poking the fire. I'm sorry I don't think I fully understood the question. Either way my answer remains the same.
38. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Have you been paying attention to any of this??
39. HOW OLD WILL Y0U BE TURNING ON Y0UR NEXT BIRTHDAY?
I'm not answering that.
40. ARE YOU PICKY ABOUT SPELLING AND GRAMMAR?
If you wanna abbreviate every word of the english language into 3 letters then be my guest you lazy fucking ass hole.
41. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO SIX FLAGS?
lol omg wtf?!? brb...
43. DO YOU GET ALONG BETTER WITH THE SAME SEX OR THE DIFFERENT?
OK I'm back. The "different sex"? What the hell is the "the different sex"??? I prefer to make love to the different sex. Man I'm so metro.
44.DO YOU LIKE MUSTARD?
Fuck you you god damned intrusive piece of shit... ... Oh mustard. Yes.
45. DO Y0U SLEEP ON YOUR SIDE, STOMACH, or BACK?
Ever consider the word "back-side"? Why do people refer to their ass as their "back-side". Who's ass is on the side of their back? It would like hang off your hip, and when you took a dump you'd have to lean to stop it from getting on your shoes. I sleep on my backside.
46. DO YOU WATCH THE NEWS?
No news is good news.
47. HOW DID YOU GET ONE OF YOUR SCARS?
Vietnam gave me the one on my eyebrow. Either that or falling out of my babywalker... like rambo.
48. WHO WAS THE LAST PERS0N TO MAKE YOU MAD?
Myself for carrying out this ludicrous nonsense
49. DO YOU LIKE ANYB0DY?
I'm assuming this is a childish way of asking if I am currently interested in dating another member of this glorious abomination we call the human race but I am going to go with my gut reaction and say No! I fucking hate everybody, I hate you, I hate me, and I hate this stupid fucking quiz.
50. WHAT IS THE LAST THING YOU PURCHASED?
A big baloon shaped love heart to give to the world in some pussy ceremony where I release it to the skies so that everyone can feel the rainbow of love, rain its dirty piss down on the lot of you. No more questions.
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-16 10:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-16 10:16:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2006-10-15 18:25:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
You have my first review in probably a year. Well fucking played man. Funny shit.
When you get a chance, we all know myspace is lame but i's good for band promo...
www.myspace.com/mrwolf
I do indeed despise Myspace EXCEPT when used by bands to get their music out there.
I mean, hell, The Buzzcocks and Eddie and The Hot Rods both have MySpace accounts.
As long as we're talking music, I'm sure you know who Brian James is.
Check THIS out...You will love it. Brian James Gang
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgI8HGOiViM
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2006-10-13 03:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't think much of the plot, but the characters, they seem so real.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-10-11 09:56:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
26. DO YOU DO YOUR OWN DISHES?
I have a dishwasher fool
------------
What's their name?
Submitted by paint_it_black (user info) at 2006-10-10 21:06:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I usually hate this kind of shit but the DNS server stuff got me LOL'n 2 tha MaX
Submitted by Jack_Burton (user info) at 2006-10-10 20:21:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2006-10-10 15:26:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Filename.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-10-10 14:59:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
title
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-10-10 14:17:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Should have stopped at 10 or maybe 0
Submitted by august_sobriquet (user info) at 2006-10-10 14:07:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i though this was humorous.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:59:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:31:33 (#)
Ranking: -1
51. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU COPIED AND PASTED A SHITTY E-MAIL FORWARD ON A SERIOUS WRITER'S FORUM?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Serious writers forum?? Ha ha ha. Last time I was here I saw 3 old men sucking each other off, does that still happen? What am I talking about, I'm at ubersite of course it still happens.
Of course if you missed any of the irony in my posting an email forward and taking the piss out of the email forward then feel free to criticise you fucking noob.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:58:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck you n00b.
This shit belongs on Myspace.
(Rating the poster not the post).
-Dave
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:48:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ScarfaceMN (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:45:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
How the fuck did I get to livejournal? ubersite.com, you fucking piece of shit computer!
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
+2 for your answer to part 10. -4 for mentioning it in part 11
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:36:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD REVIEWED A POST?
Weird. Where did my review go?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:31:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
51. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU COPIED AND PASTED A SHITTY E-MAIL FORWARD ON A SERIOUS WRITER'S FORUM?
Submitted by STIXS (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:25:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to have to concur.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:22:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
solid worth reading
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:17:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 title and first two sentences, don't want to read the rest or it'll ruin it.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:14:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
#12.
Classic.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-10-10 13:13:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Great, keep this on myspace, where it belongs, fag.