i heard... that motherfucker had, like, thirty goddamn dicks (2472 hits)
Category: RomanceLabels: crap
Rating: 1.19 on 94 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by scourge - 1 Uber Year Old Today!!!!! (View user info) at 2006-10-13 11:32:25 EDT
I have wasted a year of my life on you bunch of fuckwits.
Unbelievable.
Simply unbelievable.
What the holy fuck is wrong with me?
Per tradition, go here, http://www.ubersite.com/u/scourge , and spam me with +2s or -2's, your choice. I don't really care either way. I'm too damn lazy to add favorites of mine. They all sucked anyway.
Apparently I'm Uber popular and I can get away with this, or so I'm told.
I've also been told I'm a garbage truck driver whose opinion doesn't matter.
As a special present, I will break my +2 streak for jokes. Make me laugh and I'll -2 a post of your choosing, it doesn't have to be yours. Tell me a joke and leave me a link.
That is all. I'm leaving for a couple hours, I expect to see this erased from the front page when I return.
User Reviews
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-05-18 12:51:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-31 22:33:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
0? Not a +2?
DEVASTATING.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-31 22:33:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't you get banned for +2ing all my posts after I composed this POS?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88935
OOH FEEL THE LINKPIMP
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-10-31 22:29:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I've had it up to here with your shennanigans, I'm going through and -2ing ALL of your posts!
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-10-27 14:51:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-10-27 14:35:19 (#)
Ranking: -2
stop using oathmeal to +2 yourself
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-27 14:47:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I LOVE MYSELF!!
SIGNED,
SCOURGEY
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-27 13:43:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-27 13:39:58 (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95020#2202073
banning attempt
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-17 13:01:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-17 09:38:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-16 21:57:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
SUSIE'S ON A ROLL.
Though i must say, your Canadia jokes are lost on me.
===
i WAS going to invite Suie to join my uber harem, but she neglected to leave me my +2, as is appropriate. now she will be invited, but has to pleasure the other women as well as me.
i have spoken.
------------------
Here's your +2 then (that was already left on my first response, but we won't bicker over small things) Besides, you had asked for -2's AND I believe you said once that ratings don't matter to you. So which is it Scourge?? ;) Anyhow, thanks for the invite. I'll take it under consideration.
Sorry, Sacrilicious, I know that joke won't make any sense to non-Canadians. Just subsitute whatever state you guys make fun of.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2006-10-17 11:52:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
He's coming. He's coming.
I have watched that video relentlessly since someone posted the link here.
I can't think of any jokes right now.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-17 10:15:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-17 09:43:32 (#)
Ranking: -2
What's black and white and red all over?
Scourge.
Nice post, asshead.
===
THIS JOKE SUCKED.
:(
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-17 09:43:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What's black and white and red all over?
Scourge.
Nice post, asshead.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-17 09:38:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-16 21:57:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
SUSIE'S ON A ROLL.
Though i must say, your Canadia jokes are lost on me.
===
i WAS going to invite Suie to join my uber harem, but she neglected to leave me my +2, as is appropriate. now she will be invited, but has to pleasure the other women as well as me.
i have spoken.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-16 21:57:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SUSIE'S ON A ROLL.
Though i must say, your Canadia jokes are lost on me.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-16 21:34:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously...
What do you call 100 cows lying on their backs in a field masturbating?
Beef Stroganoff (strokin off)
At the end of his divorce, a man finds a magic lamp. He rubs it and a genie pops out and grants him three wishes BUT whatever he gets, his ex-wife gets double.
First he asks for a mansion. He gets his mansion, his ex-wife gets two.
Second he asks for a luxury car. He gets his car, his ex-wife gets two.
Finally, he asks to be beaten half to death.
And my last joke (I promise....for now):
A Newfie walks into a convenience store looking for condoms. He finds a three pack that is $2.99. He brings them up to the register and drops down three dollars. The clerk shakes his head and says "That'll be $3.45."
The Newfie says "But the sticker says $2.99!"
The clerk responds "Yes, that's $2.99 plus tax."
"Tax!" the Newfie yells "Jezus b'ye, I thought they held themselves on!"
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-16 20:42:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How do you keep an asshole in suspense?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-15 21:33:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call lepers in a hot tub?
Stew.
What did the leper tell the prostitute?
"Keep the tip."
Submitted by WatchMyStep (user info) at 2006-10-15 20:50:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-15 17:23:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-15 14:01:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
Saw a commercial, thought of you
http://www.furmovie.com/
===
me big bro already clued me into this, but thank you kindly lady.
happy birthday rob.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-15 15:24:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2. Happy Birthday to me. Weeeee!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-15 14:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Saw a commercial, thought of you
http://www.furmovie.com/
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2006-10-15 13:43:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How many jews can you fit into a vw beatle. 100. 2 in front, 3 in back and 95 in the ashtray.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2006-10-14 23:35:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yawnfest
Submitted by littledan (user info) at 2006-10-14 08:12:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:38:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
can we please not talk about the holocaust on this post?
seriously, it's not funny, people. for chrissakes, my grandfather died at a concentration camp.
he got drunk and fell out of a guard tower...
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
BAAWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-10-14 06:16:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah? well I've wasted THREE years here! HA!
I'm a bigger loser than ALL OF YOU!
and your jokes SUCK
HA
HAHAHAH
HA
ha.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-14 00:27:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mets pitching blew.
Blew like my ex-wife for a dinner out.
But at least this series is more dramatic than the AL Choakland fest.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-14 00:17:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
St. Louis for the win baby!!
9 - 6
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-10-14 00:14:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn friggin Cardinals.
They hit well tonight.
Mets pitching kinda sucked.
Billy Wagner.....ugh.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-13 17:52:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
me
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-13 17:12:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:53:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a joke for you:
The St. Louis Cardinals.
Oops. That was mean. Sorry. :)
====
This is the meanest thing BigMike has ever done. I told you guys I would take over as nicest guy on Uber, see him baiting me? So cruel...
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 17:12:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
another genie joke
A black man is cleaning out his dirty back yard when he comes across a lamp. He picks it up and rubs it. Out comes a magical genie who says he will grant 3 wishes.
The black man wants to be rich, so he wishes that all the junk in the yard turns into money and treasure. The junk turns to gold
For his second wish, he wants to stay rich and be sucessful. He knows he cannot do this as a black man so he wishes to be white. He turns white.
For his last wish he decides that he doesn't want to ever work again. So the genie turned him into a black man.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 17:01:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this post makes me drip pee pee
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:53:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a joke for you:
The St. Louis Cardinals.
Oops. That was mean. Sorry. :)
Submitted by DrSeussman (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:04:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.jameshillforcongress.com/
No joke, just informing the public of the first "pirate for Congress" that I've ever heard of.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Caught that article this morning, I think the guys a genius!!
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:21:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRiqps32F4s
IT'S JULIE
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:15:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:17:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
I have a few Jokes for you....are you ready....maybe you should sit down
Ok here we go
Sphagnum
WTH
Maltese
DPrime
sicosemen
UnderOathMeal
CinderBlock
------
hee hee
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:04:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.jameshillforcongress.com/
No joke, just informing the public of the first "pirate for Congress" that I've ever heard of.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:03:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Giraffe tongue below.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm terrible at telling jokes, so I'll simply tell you that I love you mattius and am glad you've stuck around.
Happy Uberversary :)
Submitted by DrSeussman (user info) at 2006-10-13 16:00:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call an epileptic in a garden?
Seizure Salad.
Submitted by DrSeussman (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:58:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Because I got snot bubble from laughing so hard this has to be posted twice~!
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:59:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
A gay couple are walking down the beach and they find a magic lamp in the sand. One of the gay guys walks up and rubs it.
Out pops a magic genie and the gay couple becomes excited for they know what happens next.
The genie says he will grant them one wish. The couple is so excited that they don't know what to wish for. So they decide to go home and "celebrate" for awhile.
At home the gay couple are making furious ass love. Then out of nowhere, the Ku Klux Klan bust through the door and they proceed to hang the gay man who was giving.
"HELP HELP" he screams. "USE THE WISH!"
"I can't! I already used it!" The receiving man said.
"What did you wish for?"
"I wanted you to be hung like a nigger."
Submitted by DrSeussman (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:56:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
In the going to hell soon category I give you....
What's better than winning the gold in the special olympics?
Not being retarded!!
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:45:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy Uberbirthday!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:43:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you guys fucking kill me
i leave for 2 hours and this is all heated up. plenty of good jokes. i'll look into -2ing those links pretty soon.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:32:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc9y5ayeeb4 The link.
Submitted by Still-Life (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:30:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Six foot twenty fuckin' killing for fun.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:19:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tom and Betty were an old married couple, they led a simple ho-hum sort of life.
Tom had always wanted a pair cowboy boots and on his way home one day he saw the most beautiful pair in the window of a store.
Being full of himself that day Tom strolled in and bought the boots.
Tom skipped home as happy as can be, wearing his new boots. When he walked in the door he stood proudly in front of his wife.
"Betty," he said "notice anything new about me?"
Betty looked him up and down and said "No Tom not really"
Upset, Tom went into the bedroom, stripped off all his clothing except his boots and came back out.
"Now do you notice anything new about?"
Betty looked at her husband and sighed "Tom...it was hanging down yesterday, it's hanging down today, and it'll probably be hanging down tomorrow."
Unwilling to give in Tom shouts "Well Betty, it's hanging down because its checking out MY NEW BOOTS!!!"
Betty smirked and said "Tom...you should have bought a hat"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 15:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just wet myself reading that last joke...
|
|
v
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:59:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A gay couple are walking down the beach and they find a magic lamp in the sand. One of the gay guys walks up and rubs it.
Out pops a magic genie and the gay couple becomes excited for they know what happens next.
The genie says he will grant them one wish. The couple is so excited that they don't know what to wish for. So they decide to go home and "celebrate" for awhile.
At home the gay couple are making furious ass love. Then out of nowhere, the Ku Klux Klan bust through the door and they proceed to hang the gay man who was giving.
"HELP HELP" he screams. "USE THE WISH!"
"I can't! I already used it!" The receiving man said.
"What did you wish for?"
"I wanted you to be hung like a nigger."
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:54:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:38:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
can we please not talk about the holocaust on this post?
seriously, it's not funny, people. for chrissakes, my grandfather died at a concentration camp.
he got drunk and fell out of a guard tower...
--------------
Hahahaha that one made me piss myself.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why can't Hellen Keller drive a car?
cause she's a woman
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:42:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:17:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
I have a few Jokes for you....are you ready....maybe you should sit down
Ok here we go
Sphagnum
WTH
Maltese
DPrime
sicosemen
UnderOathMeal
CinderBlock
---
Thanks for thinking of me, outofshapemofo.
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:38:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
can we please not talk about the holocaust on this post?
seriously, it's not funny, people. for chrissakes, my grandfather died at a concentration camp.
he got drunk and fell out of a guard tower...
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:17:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have a few Jokes for you....are you ready....maybe you should sit down
Ok here we go
Sphagnum
WTH
Maltese
DPrime
sicosemen
UnderOathMeal
CinderBlock
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 14:13:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How did Hitler tie his shoes?
In little nazi's.
ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!! ALL FOR MOE!!!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:55:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice.
Submitted by Cadrach (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:55:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Clique, clique, boom.
Submitted by Biotch (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:48:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call a cow having muscle spasms??
Beef Jerkey
Submitted by jade_digitalmedia (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:48:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy UBERversery you fucking rockstar you!
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:29:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy uberversary.
woo.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:17:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A priest and the Pope go golfing one day. Everything is going fine until they get to the first green. The Pope lines up his shot, and misses by inches. In a tirade he screams "Fucking shit, I missed!".
Caught off guard, the priest says "Do you think you should be using that langage, Your Holiness.'
The Pope tells him it's okay because he is so close to God.
They get to the next green, and same thing. The Pope misses and yells "Fucking shit, I missed."
Again the priest questions him and again the Pope shrugs it off.
This happens every hole. Finally, they are at the 18th and the Pope is putting. He missed and lightning strikes the priest dead.
A voice booms from the heavens, "Fucking shit, I missed!"
I'll save my -2.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:13:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:56:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call a low fat communion wafer?
I can't believe it's not Jesus.
What do you see when the Pillsbury dough boy bends over?
Dough nuts.
==============================
BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-13 13:01:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A man goes into a lawyer's office and says, "I heard people have sued the tobacco companies for giving them lung cancer, and McDonald's for making them fat."
The lawyer says, "Yes, that's true."
The man says, "Well, I'm interested in suing too."
The lawyer says, "Okay, McDonald's, or the tobacco companies?"
The man says, "Neither I'm suing Budweiser for all the ugly people I've slept with."
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:56:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call a low fat communion wafer?
I can't believe it's not Jesus.
What do you see when the Pillsbury dough boy bends over?
Dough nuts.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:48:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dork
there's no joke
I just called you a dork
whatcha gonna do about it hu hu what
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:46:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEADON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD.
HEADON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD.
HEADON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:44:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He'll save the children but not the British children
He'll save the children but not the British children
He'll save the children but not the British children
Submitted by CHR15 (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
stfu noob
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:29:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My favorite bad joke of all time:
Do you know why lions and tigers can't play cards in the jungle?
Too many cheetahs!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Funnier each time I tell it.
Know how to get a nun pregnant?
Fuck her.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:24:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He'll save children, but not the British children.
He'll save children, but not the British children.
He'll save children, but not the British children.
He'll save children, but not the British children.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In a row?
Submitted by marginwalker (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:15:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay fer Scourge.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:02:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What do you call an old black man standing in a cotton field?
Antique Farming Equipment.
YEAH, I WENT THERE>
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-13 12:00:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I had hoped you were going to -2 me out of hate.
A -2 out of humor just isn't the same.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:59:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus. You people just jizz all over eachother constantly.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:58:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's the second BEST joke EVAR. After my Batman/Robin one.
SUCK A DICK, POPULAR JOKE WORLD. I HAVE RENDERED YOU USELESS. LIKE MY FIFTH TESTICLE AND MY VESTIGAL TAIL.
OR SHLONGY'S ATTEMPT TO COMB HIS HAIR OVER.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
He loves the children, but not the British children.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:57:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*groans*
You're right...THAT is far worse. :p
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:57:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ummm..NOOOOOOOO
It's my favorite joke, silly.
But this...
WHAT DO YOU CALL AN ITALIAN SUPPOSITORY?
AN INNUENDO
is the worst joke evar
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:56:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
One day when the teacher walked to the blackboard, she noticed someone had written the word 'penis' in tiny letters. She turned around, scanned the class looking for the guilty face.
Finding none, she quickly erased it, and began her class. The next day she went into the room, and she saw, in larger letters, the word 'penis' again on the black board. Again, she looked around in vain for the culprit, but found none, so she proceeded with the day's lesson.
Every morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found the same disgusting word written on the board, each day's word, larger than the previous day's word.
Finally, one day, she walked in, expecting to be greeted by the same word on the board, but instead, found the words: "The more you rub it, the bigger it gets!"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:52:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Saccy baby, I love you, but that is the WORST joke EVAR.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:50:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS AN AGNOSTIC, A DYSLEXIC, AND AN INSOMNIAC?
SOMEONE WHO STAYS UP ALL NIGHT WONDERING IF THERE IS A DOG.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:49:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.
THIS JOKE IS SO FUCKING BALLS THAT IT MAKES MY MUSCLES HURT. MY FUCK MUSCLES.
YOU ALL DON'T DESERVE TO READ IT, BUT I LOVE YOU ANYWAY.
TIME TO DO SOME MORE MALE KEGELS.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:49:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Way to stick around. Come on up to Peoria tonight, and we can knock back a brewskie while watching the Cards suck probably even more ass tonight than in last night's game.
Obligatory joke:
Q: What do you call a 400 pound woman who likes both men and women?
A: A bisexual built for 2.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94370
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:47:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How do you make pizza? Stick a leper next to a fan.
SCOURGE ROCKS THE HOUSE LIKE A DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH. I ONCE HAD A DIAMOND BUT I TOOK IT FOR GRANITE GET IT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAPENIS I HATE THAT CAPS LOCK IS STILL ON DEVASTATING.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay then they would be bagels.
THE HITS JUST KEEP ON COMIN'!!!!
IPA! IPA! FELIZ ANO NUEVO, MANG!
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:45:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy Uberversary Scourge. I don't want you to -2 anything for me, but here's a joke anyway:
How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Wanna go ride bikes?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:44:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Two ropes walk into a bar. The bartender says to the rope "Hey! we don't serve ropes in here" so one of the ropes left. The other rope frayed up his hair and tied himself in a knot. The bartender said to the rope "Are you a rope?" and the rope said " I'm afaid not."
OH YEAH MOTHERFUCKER IT'S GONNA BE THAT KINDA DAY!!!
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:44:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The Bungles are going to lose this weekend.
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:37:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Two Jewish guys were talking together, one turns to the other and says....
I don't remember the punchline but it had to do with Hitler killing his father.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/85557
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:37:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Washington, Washington...
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:36:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Congrats, another uberversary post that I don't care about, but everyone will suck your dick for. I guess the good news is that you can always count on me to neg2 any post that has uberversary and i got "x" amount of hits, etc. etc. The other news, good or not, is that you've been on your +2 tirade for so long and got nothing accomplished, so why not just call the whole +2 streak off and rate accordingly like the rest of us.
Good luck, Matt, hope to see you for another year too, chum.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:35:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I adore you, Matty.
No Joke.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:34:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was "blaerrrghflallfffghhererrrrghghallballmmrrf."
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:34:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A black baby was born with wings. He asked god if it was because he was an angel. God said nah nigga you a bat.
Yeah I know, best joke of all time.
-2 this post
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93434
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-10-13 11:34:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How does Hellen Keller's parents punish her?
They leave a plunger in the toilet seat. -2 Squattail's last post.