Ubersite
Home - About Us - Contact
"We must become the change we want to see in the world" - Gandhi
Welcome to Ubersite!
Search Ubersite
Search for:

Most Recently Reviewed
  1. The Luckiest
  2. You Moron Yanks Seem To Th...
  3. Thoughts about tonight
  4. majuls cartoons personal d...
  5. My adventures in a White C...
  6. Bigger than Maddox... Oh, ...
  7. Skiing in Dubai
  8. Picture of a Cow #5
  9. Uber Childhood Directory
  10. GrUeBERfest is good for yo...
more...
Most Heated
  1. This is a serious writers ... (81 heat)
  2. People Like This Need To B... (67 heat)
  3. McCunt (or, John McCain Sh... (47 heat)
  4. Bigger than Maddox... Oh, ... (45 heat)
  5. Porn (40 heat)
  6. Is Tom Brokaw gonna BITCHS... (38 heat)
  7. United States, Bend Over -... (31 heat)
  8. Presidential Campain Capti... (31 heat)
  9. Vote McCain or I'll Eat Yo... (29 heat)
  10. Jack McCallum thanks for t... (28 heat)
more...
Most Viewed Messages
  1. The Ultimate MS Paint: It... (1143225 hits)
  2. "If I cum now, will it be ... (698845 hits)
  3. Exploiting Peer-to-Peer Ne... (385757 hits)
  4. How To Pick Up Chicks (325687 hits)
  5. Motivating the Weekend (305382 hits)
  6. Knockoff porn movie titles (300352 hits)
  7. My J-Date Misadventure (286152 hits)
  8. Licking A Bum's Ass (249681 hits)
  9. Badass Australian Cows (246832 hits)
  10. Totally Useless Facts (231101 hits)
more...
Most Viewed Authors
  1. Bart Cilfone (1454850 hits)
  2. Stanley Moore (1440010 hits)
  3. JMG114 (1378258 hits)
  4. Razor (1372629 hits)
  5. MickGinny (1283067 hits)
  6. loki (1060342 hits)
  7. Jonukah (972501 hits)
  8. weeeeep (922907 hits)
  9. outed (898283 hits)
  10. Cat Crooner Extraordinaire (883928 hits)
  11. Ubersite needs me! (875776 hits)
  12. Asian Men Love Me (873060 hits)
  13. Tom (831553 hits)
  14. Sideburns, MUHFUCKA (805374 hits)
  15. apollo88 (761474 hits)
  16. oy vey (753975 hits)
  17. T+I+G+E+R (749683 hits)
  18. Sorrell (742635 hits)
  19. Satan is my Motor (688622 hits)
  20. RON PAUL 2008! (683827 hits)
  21. HIDDEN101 (682608 hits)
  22. Sock Penis™ (677217 hits)
  23. Phil Phone (639208 hits)
  24. Banned (639018 hits)
  25. T to the ToM (626117 hits)
  26. iddqd (618079 hits)
  27. kaos-king (603507 hits)
  28. comicbookguy (587122 hits)
  29. ♥ (581619 hits)
  30. O (577374 hits)
Click here to return to the list of messages.

George Bush, Faggotized Conservatives and Shitfuck the Terrorist Boards the Freedomish Airline (2024 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 1.6 on 94 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by shitfuck (View user info) at 2006-10-22 15:13:11 EDT



Rob Berg came up with a fantastical word the other night when he and I were enjoying a few rye and cokes at a very trendy yet undertoned Vancouver watering hole.

Freedomish.

The second he pronounced it I was startled by its greatness and truthiness.

Freedomish.

I'm a lover of words. This word is worth loving because in it you can see the smudge between real freedom--the freedom we used to know--and the New Freedom, more of a freedomish type of arrangement where one is permitted to feel free so long as there is someone else out there still hovering in dark control of it all.

This will make more sense to you in about seven minutes.

***

This year has been a real eye opener for me. More than that--it's been the year that my eyes were squeezed out of my head, plucked free with rusty hedge clippers and then stomped on by blackboot wearing warriors of the New Freedom.

For those of you that don't know--I am under investigation by the Secret Service as well as a Canadian institution called the National Security Investigation Service (NSIS).

Want to know why? Research it.

http://www.ubersite.com/m/83750
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92491

A few weeks ago, through the magic of techmology, I was tracked down by an RCMP officer here in Edmonton--he was a very genuine man, this I could tell instantly. Before meeting with him I asked if he was going to arrest me, he said no. I asked if I needed a lawyer--again he said no, he just wanted to meet with me to discuss some things. I agreed to go, but I brought my lawyer anyway.

Imagine this--

All your secrets and private goings on suddenly become known to someone else.

Would you feel naked?

I do.

***

Imagine someone pulling out a file folder an inch thick, on top of it a letter with an American address on it--I bet you'd wonder what was in that folder. Don't deny it. No one in the world is so clean and perfect not to have a few skeletons dangling in the metaphorical closet.

Get this--they won't even let you know what they know about you.

shitfuck used to be my skeleton.

A chance to piss off everyone in a really insanely obscene way.

My idea of freedom allowed for it, but in our newly freedomish world, it makes me a danger to an entire government--a threat to the American way of life.

That's right--all those backwater hillbilly gun fucking cowards and bible humpers should cower in fear--shitfuck the terrorist is single-handedly destroying a country of 300 million people with an evil collection of syllables, vowels and frequent expletives.

Can you fucking believe it?

You fucking should.

P.S. God is a fucking faggot and Jesus fluffs my balls every night, Conservatives are a bunch of hand job artists and rapists of kids under the age of 18. George Bush is a pussy ass bitch leading a company of vote stealers and criminals in a campaign against humanity. Somewhere in time there is a noose being knotted, and it's got FOX news written all over it like a surprise ejaculation launched across the Whitehouse garden.

***

I wonder--if I wrote something titled 'Kill Kim Jong Ill' would the SS send me flowers?

I'd bet my right nut that more than a few of the agents and investigators currently keeping me under tabs have scrolled through my past works here on Uber and laughed hysterically.

I'm no comedian, but at times I can be a real abstractionist--a true surrealist with words--and that's what makes people take a second look. At least that's how I figure it...

No matter what type of gun you might be carrying at the moment.

***

Your seven minutes are up.

Freedomish. This is my only freedom now. I know that my phone calls have been tapped, emails read, every detail of my life now belong to a few good men and women--men and women that probably got involved in the Secret Service and the National Security Investigation Service because they believed that what they are doing, the sacrifices they make--are all for a better world.

***

On the way home from Vancouver, I check in at the airport, go for a beer with my girlfriend, an hour later I'm at the security check point--I notice a few of the guards talking and looking at me, I'm pulled out of line, a guard puts on plastic stretchy gloves and asks if I want this done in a private room--I tell him no.

What's there left for me to hide?

He begins by touching every part of my body. Head to foot. Then in my pants. No kidding, this motherfucker has got his hands in my pants juggling around for a dirty bomb.

I've got nothing but balls for you buddy. Put them in your mouth and choke like the bitch you are.

My shoes get taken away for a separate investigation, he feels up my feet, up my legs. Turns me around forcefully, instructs me not to move. 'Look straight ahead'. My girlfriend is in the background getting upset that I'm being treated like this--I tell her it's okay. He makes me sit in the corner, other passengers are filing by looking at me, shoeless, shirt out of my pants, trying not to loose my cool--but I know what's going on here--if I complain then I must be guilty.

I will never be permitted to enter the US, I am a person of interest, the American government as well as my own government are spending thousands of dollars making sure I'm not flying planes into buildings--I don't even know how to fly.

Kids are dumber than ever, healthcare is a fucking disaster all over North America and yet for some reason keeping shitfuck controlled is an appropriate expenditure. Freedomish.

***

I drop F bombs like George Bush kills innocent civilians and Conservative motherfucks destroy freedoms. I'm a terrorist, the Secret Service says so. Inbred cock sucking 'America is Great' chanting faggotized people all over the south rejoice in knowing that they can sleep sound and free from my constant blitzkreiging of their fucked up morality.

They let me on the plane, we make it home, I'm unpacking when I notice that my luggage has been opened up and shuffled through.

Someone, somewhere had opened it up, checked everything in it and relieved me of my video camera.

They're lucky I do most of my writing in my head, that my imagination is locked up in an area of the brain they can never get to.

Several alarm systems are in place, trip one and the whole fucking head explodes all over you--

the bloody truth.

So put that in your pipe and pretend not to inhale it.

***



not just me the thousands behind me.jpg (58 kB)

Submit to Digg Submit to StumbleUpon

User Reviews


Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2007-01-02 15:10:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Shitfuck Rules!

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2007-01-02 14:48:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I just had to read and rate again. Well done, sir.

Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-23 17:34:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Be grateful you're not Arabic.

Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2006-11-23 17:03:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

This took forever for me to come across. I found it referenced in Wikipedias Ubersite article. Nice stuff shitfuck. Its cool you're a fellow Edmontonian.

Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2006-10-31 15:49:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

let's have a beer sometime. any g-man that thought you were a threat to Bush is either a massive idiot or has too much time on their hands and not enough to put on their resume.

i suppose i'll lose my security clearance now for giving you a +2, but what the hell.


i'm mad that the Trailer Park Boys was only released in Canada. i was almost ready to fly up there just to see it.

Submitted by marginwalker (user info) at 2006-10-31 15:17:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2006-10-30 02:42:51 (#)
Ranking: -2

please tell me how to trip the alarms that explode your head ass clown. stay the fuck out of America.
--------------------------------
Go fuck yourself. No one wants into your mess-of-a-motherland.
Dont worry.

Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2006-10-30 02:42:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

please tell me how to trip the alarms that explode your head ass clown. stay the fuck out of America.

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-24 08:16:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

http://www.rsf.org/rubrique.php3?id_rubrique=639

Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-10-24 04:42:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2


Dude.....


GW cybers with my little brother every night and calls him his "little filthy terrorist whore". Then when there's no reciprocation, he has Canadians molested.

Facking perv.

Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2006-10-23 21:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by BlueEagle (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:55:20 (#)
Ranking: -2

Go screw a goat, you Canadian bastard. You can't get away with everything you want, and you can't have "total freedom." It just doesn't exist. And if it did, I bet you'd end up a dead man at the hands of "backwater hillbilly gun fucking coward" or "bible humper" before long. America has more freedoms for her people than any country in the world, and if you don't like that, STAY THE FUCK IN CANADA.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------



WOW, you're fucking dumb!

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-23 19:15:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by BlueEagle (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:55:20 (#)
Ranking: -2

Go screw a goat, you Canadian bastard. You can't get away with everything you want, and you can't have "total freedom." It just doesn't exist. And if it did, I bet you'd end up a dead man at the hands of "backwater hillbilly gun fucking coward" or "bible humper" before long. America has more freedoms for her people than any country in the world, and if you don't like that, STAY THE FUCK IN CANADA.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

The thought of leaving Canada never entered my mind.

Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2006-10-23 17:17:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by BlueEagle (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:55:20 (#)
Ranking: -2

Go screw a goat, you Canadian bastard. You can't get away with everything you want, and you can't have "total freedom." It just doesn't exist. And if it did, I bet you'd end up a dead man at the hands of "backwater hillbilly gun fucking coward" or "bible humper" before long. America has more freedoms for her people than any country in the world, and if you don't like that, STAY THE FUCK IN CANADA.


___


Seriously dude. Here, I have some Xanax, I think you need it more than I do....

Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-10-23 17:04:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-23 13:22:29 (#)
Ranking: 2

I don't know which is funnier, that fact that you wrote this post, or the fact that several copies of this post have been printed out and are sitting in the IN box of a field agent somewhere in FBI-land...

Submitted by BlueEagle (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:55:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Go screw a goat, you Canadian bastard. You can't get away with everything you want, and you can't have "total freedom." It just doesn't exist. And if it did, I bet you'd end up a dead man at the hands of "backwater hillbilly gun fucking coward" or "bible humper" before long. America has more freedoms for her people than any country in the world, and if you don't like that, STAY THE FUCK IN CANADA.




Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2006-10-23 15:24:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

you ARE a fucking legend

Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2006-10-23 15:20:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

HEY FUCK YOU I PLAY VIDEO GAMES!!!

Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-10-23 15:10:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-10-23 13:11:15 (#)
Ranking: -1

Off to play Final Fantasy 20...

-----------------

How did I know you were into video games... Videogamers tend to be smartass little punks who have to turn everything into a joke so they don't have to live a single minute in the real world.

Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2006-10-23 14:56:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Wow dude. I never thought I'd be viewing shitfuck as a martyr.


Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:22:33 (#)
Ranking: 2

when the revolution comes, im on this guy's side


__

Yep.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-10-23 14:28:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

OK, this was good in a horrifying way...


You're still a both of Cocksucking Assholes though.

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-10-23 14:23:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


"Rob Berg came up with a fantastical word the other night when he and I were enjoying a few rye and cokes at a very trendy yet undertoned Vancouver watering hole. "


!!! FUCKERS!

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-23 13:22:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I don't know which is funnier, that fact that you wrote this post, or the fact that several copies of this post have been printed out and are sitting in the IN box of a field agent somewhere in FBI-land...

Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-10-23 13:12:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Oops, wrong review below.
Same rating though. This sucks.

Submitted by gank (user info) at 2006-10-23 13:11:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Felony:

I could link you a rebuttal to the claim you are making, and further argue with you guys about how the Roswell (or Corona) Incident was honestly the crash of an alien ship. Because that's what ETS would do, if he believed that particular conspiracy theory. But he doesn't, and neither do I.

I'm just proving a point though, and having a little fun at his expense. That's why I called him Jerry Fletcher at the beginning of that review.

Off to play Final Fantasy 20...

Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2006-10-23 12:08:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Don't drop the soap.

Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-23 11:57:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2



Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:14:17 (#)
Ranking: -2

"I really don't care what the moronic jerkoffs on ubersite have to say in agreement to this angry, arrogant dumbass. It is one of the reason this website just plain sucks... Idiots.... Idiots who think they are better than others when they don't know jack shit."

---

Funny, that is precisely what I think about your willful ignorance "Stabkill".

You spew out your contempt and idiocy and in your distain for intelligent aware people who dwell on this site - you ironically succinctly articulate how most of the very people you marginalize feel about YOU.

You are little more than a polarizing idiot whose participation in any discussion actually makes people stupider.

It's an all too common, annoying gift.

Congratulations: you = distractive asshole


Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-10-23 11:35:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:21:44 (#)
Ranking: 0

ETS is a delusional nut who obviously thinks only republicans are bad... when democrats are equally shitty.

--------------

How many times have I said Clinton was a crook? How many times have I said that going the way of Great Britain, which is where the dems would eventually lead us, is a mistake? More than you can fucking count.

Stop trying to margainalize me, asshole. It ain't that fucking easy.

It is up to everyone to research their local races and vote accordingly. This includes going back over voting records and reading a bit more than just bylines on how they voted. Sometimes you have to actually READ the finer print contained within the bill to see that Republicans overwhelmingly voted against expanding benefits for veterans, for example.

It might take a bit of research to figure out if your congressman has served your interests or the "special" kind. You'll probably find plenty of Republicans worthy of retaining their jobs. Ron Paul of Texas is one good example.

I have no beef with the Republican party as a whole, and I pity those who think that simply voting democrats in is going to solve all our problems. All I can say is, it's been over a decade since they've been given a chance, maybe that lesson will sink in. And if it didn't, they will get the boot too come '08.

Ideally, everyone would say "fuck em both" and vote green or libertarian, but that day has not yet come, I fear.

That said, I'm going to thoroughly enjoy casting my vote for a libertarian candidate against Senator Luger here in Indiana. That asshole has been in office since before I was BORN! It's time to kick his ass to the curb, whether he's got a democratic challenger or not.

Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:35:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

"........P.S. God is a fucking faggot and Jesus fluffs my balls every night, Conservatives are a bunch of hand job artists and rapists of kids under the age of 18. George Bush is a pussy ass bitch leading a company of vote stealers and criminals in a campaign against humanity. Somewhere in time there is a noose being knotted, and it's got FOX news written all over it like a surprise ejaculation launched across the Whitehouse garden........"


*THIS* is why i saw we need to storm the radio studios that syndicate and broadcast Rush Limbaugh, knife them in the gut, and let shitfuck take the airways. All you'd need to do is get him to say something snappy, like, "Thats just my opinion, i could be wrong" for a closing.... and we can off dennis miller too.

Submitted by IWalkOnPavement (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:26:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

This post scared the shit out of me...

Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:21:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

ETS is a delusional nut who obviously thinks only republicans are bad... when democrats are equally shitty. Check out New Jersey democrats in recent news, Einstein. And, because of the MSM's usual coverups of any democrat wrongdoings... you may have to dig a little.

Fucking MSN...fucking ETS.... Fucking threaten the president and have a shitload of moronic dickfaces on a website suck your dick and agree....

Ubersite is like a magnet for social waste liberal-types.

Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:14:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:59:28 (#)
Ranking: 2

I can't wait til 2008!

-------------

But we need a fix in '06.

Vote. Throw these crooked motherfuckers out on their asses.

Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:14:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Ubersite is full of idiots like this:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:46:25 (#)
Ranking: 2

I came away from this thinking it was the greatest thing I have ever read on ubersite.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Shitfuck is nothing new. He is a male version of Alanis Morrisette doing an "angry" album. Alanis Morrisette has moved on (and became American, I believe.) Shitfuck is just an angry nobody who vents his anger toward Bush on Ubersite while the idiots here, who regularly laugh incessantly at low-brow humor, suck his dick and think he's god.

Count me out of your little fuckfest. Shitfuck is a moron and is exactly where he is at because of himself and nobody else.

FREEDOM doesn't give you the right to go around threatening and advocating murder... especially that of a high-ranking government official. But the kiddies below all nod in agreement with this idiot and flip me the bird.

I really don't care what the moronic jerkoffs on ubersite have to say in agreement to this angry, arrogant dumbass. It is one of the reason this website just plain sucks... Idiots.... Idiots who think they are better than others when they don't know jack shit.

Go laugh at your haha emu rape posts, morons. Keep sucking this idiots cock and inflate his ego.

I'm going to side with the state dept. on this one. Stay the fuck out of the USA if you hate it so much, cockgobbler.

Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:59:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

shitfuck rules, but the government has probably been doing this for awhile anyway

but you do feel naked, this makes me excited.

Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I can't wait til 2008!

Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:46:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I came away from this thinking it was the greatest thing I have ever read on ubersite.

Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-10-23 08:36:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:12:07 (#)
Ranking: 0


Oh, let me guess--you know nothing about Arar?

Read this: http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/arar/

--------------------


That story conveniently leaves out it was the Canadian Govt who told the US he had Al-Queda ties.


Where were you flting to-from that you were checked? I didn't think US lists would affect who gets searched in canada, do they do random checks there? I really doubt they are researching all your friends and tapping your phone I am sure they interviewed you just to make sure you weren't a real threat because of some rule not because they were really concerned.

Submitted by GMCrayon (user info) at 2006-10-23 08:14:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Sieg heil! Sieg heil!

Submitted by bob (user info) at 2006-10-23 03:40:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Lord Acton never seemed so wise.

anyone knows this WITHOUT google or wikipedia gets...uh...my respect?

Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2006-10-23 03:03:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

someone once said: Sic Semper Tyrannis
he, he was a dumbass.

old gw "my daddy says its ok" bush is supposedly visiting my town sometime.

you ever see that video where the guy hits bill gates with a pie?

i'm just saying, dessert looks good on men who take themselves too seriously.

i will expect to be strip searched promptly.

Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:57:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2


Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:36:17 (#)
Ranking: 0


Rob Berg, thank you for everything.

---

You are most certainly welcome. Thank you... for being you.



Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:23:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:11:20 (#)
Ranking: 2

Bush blows. If "Jeb" runs (and god forbid, wins) I'm leaving the country. NO MORE GODDAMNED BUSH'S IN OFFICE!!!!

-------

pick me up n the way out, wouldja?

Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:14:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Valuing freedom has BECOME conservative, my friend. Artists, poets, scholars for truth...we are the true new conservatives - holding tightly these trinkets of understanding and knowledge like novelties from a lost carnival, while the rest of the world seems to be melting down around us like images in a clown's mirror.



Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord:
He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored;
He hath loosed the fateful lightning of His terrible swift sword:
His truth is marching on.

I have seen Him in the watch-fires of a hundred circling camps,
They have builded Him an altar in the evening dews and damps;
I can read His righteous sentence by the dim and flaring lamps:
His day is marching on.

I have read a fiery gospel writ in burnished rows of steel:
"As ye deal with my condemners, so with you my grace shall deal;
Let the Hero, born of woman, crush the serpent with His heel,
Since God is marching on."

He has sounded forth the trumpet that shall never call retreat;
He is sifting out the hearts of men before His judgment-seat:
Oh, be swift, my soul, to answer Him! be jubilant, my feet!
Our God is marching on.

In the beauty of the lilies Christ was born across the sea,
With a glory in His bosom that transfigures you and me:
As He died to make men holy, let us die to make men free,
While God is marching on.

He is coming like the glory of the morning on the wave,
He is Wisdom to the mighty, He is Succour to the brave,
So the world shall be His footstool, and the soul of Time His slave,
Our God is marching on.



A cockroach in the concrete, courthouse tan and beady eyes.
A slouch with fallen arches, purging truths into great lies.
A little man with a big eraser, changing history
Procedures that he's programmed to, all he hears and sees.

Altering the facts and figures, events and every issue.
Make a person disappear, and no one will ever miss you.

Rewrites every story, every poem that ever was.
Eliminates incompetence, and those who break the laws.
Follow the instructions of the New Ways' Evil Book of Rules.
Replacing rights with wrongs, the files and records in the schools.

You say you've got the answers, well who asked you anyway?
Ever think maybe it was meant to be this way?
Don't try to fool us, we know the worst is yet to come.
I believe my kingdom will come.

F is for fighting, R is for red,
Ancestors' blood in battles they've shed.
E, we elect them, E, we eject them,
In the land of the free, and the home of the brave.
D, for your dying, O, your overture,
M, they will cover your grave with manure.
This spells out freedom, it means nothing to me,
As long as there's a P.N.A.C.

F is for fighting, R is for red,
Ancestors' blood in battles they've shed.
E, we elect them, E, we eject them,
In the land of the free and the home of the brave.
D, for your dying, O, your overture,
M is for money and you know what that cures.
This spells out freedom, it means nothing to me,
As long as there's a P.N.A.C

Put your hand right up my shirt,
Pull the strings that make me work,
Jaws will part, words fall out,
like a fish with hook in mouth.

Rewrites every story, every poem that ever was.
Eliminates incompetence, and those who break the laws.
Follow the instructions of the New Ways' Evil Book of Rules.
Replacing rights with wrongs, the files and records in the schools.

I'm not a fish
I'm a man

Submitted by bob (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:06:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


What about my freedom? Imagine it--I said something that a few million other people are thinking and because of it, my life has changed. Does saying those three little words amount to attacking America?
-------------
YOU DO NOT HAVE THE FREEDOM TO EXHORT PEOPLE TO KILL SOMEONE. That's it, period, no more argument, no more talking. You may NOT DO THAT. It is not protected under free speech, it is not protected by a constitution, it is not protected by a law BECAUSE IT IS NOT A RIGHT THAT YOU HAVE. I just don't know how to make that any clearer to you. Why don't you understand that?
________________________________
It depends on the context. I dont know the incident in question. If shitfuck said something to the tune of "You should kill George Bush", then you are not protected. However, if shitfuck said "I believe that George Bush deserves to be killed because..." then he actually is protected.

The question is if his words were meant to incite someone to take action on his statement.

Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:11:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Bush blows. If "Jeb" runs (and god forbid, wins) I'm leaving the country. NO MORE GODDAMNED BUSH'S IN OFFICE!!!!

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Ooops...I just got home from a 40-drink football-a-thon and read that wrong.

Whiskey and cokes are even GAYER, if you can believe that.

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:34:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

rye and coke = whiskey and coke

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:30:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Rum and cokes are for fags, although, if you were really sitting with Rob berg, that explains it.

Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:58:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:39:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

and yes kids, what we are seeing is the beginning of big brother, omni government, et cetera


those of you are who are naysayers are fooling themselves.



what was it they said about the eurpoeans being blind to seeing a great evil grow before them?

north americans shouldnt make the same mistake

the evil is our government, and we must control it before it controls us.

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:37:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I think domenad just made a little fun of himself there.

well played old boy.



also, fuck the government. I'd rather clothheads play airplanes into us all day over being oppressed.

Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

By the way, thanks for the UM vote of confidence, but to tell you my title would be unethical, and we conservatives are always ethical. Especially around juicy young pages.

Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:05:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:03:19 (#)
Ranking: 0

I didn't threaten the president, you'll notice (and this is the exact line I gave to the Feds) I abstained from using the first person, this was intentional.
--------------
Did you honestly think they would give a good damn, or that this would make a difference? If some guy next door had a megaphone and was shouting to thousands of people (you received quite a few hits on that post, remember?) to kill you, are you telling me that's not a threat? You're not stupid, I know that. You can't possibly believe that. This is a juvenile argument, and you absolutely know that.

--------------
I understand what you're saying here, and yeah, I kinda did figure that the Secret Service, with the billion dollar budget, highly trained agents and all the techmology you can handle WOULD be able to tell that I'm not a serious threat to anyone.
--------
They are able to tell that - by doing a serious investigation of you. I don't want any cursory investigations of threats to my president, any more than I would want police to casually review a threat to me or my family.
--------------
What about my freedom? Imagine it--I said something that a few million other people are thinking and because of it, my life has changed. Does saying those three little words amount to attacking America?
-------------
YOU DO NOT HAVE THE FREEDOM TO EXHORT PEOPLE TO KILL SOMEONE. That's it, period, no more argument, no more talking. You may NOT DO THAT. It is not protected under free speech, it is not protected by a constitution, it is not protected by a law BECAUSE IT IS NOT A RIGHT THAT YOU HAVE. I just don't know how to make that any clearer to you. Why don't you understand that?
------------
My point is that in the climate of fear, everyone is a target. Maybe the SS agent that scans this will decide YOU need to be checked up on--how do you like that prospect?
------------
The minute that Homeland security starts delving into my privacy for no reason but that they feel like it, that they feel they need to keep tabs on me, I will pick up a gun, head to Canada, find you, hand you a gun as well, and say "Okay, where do we hit first?" You broke a federal law in both countries, a well known one. You are pretty lucky you didn't land in jail.
------------
As for Arar--that's bullshit, he was detained by your governmnet because your governmnet suspected ties to Al Queda--we didn't hand him over to you. Not that my government is faultless, we let him sit in a Syrian jail long after we knew the truth. Which is even more disgusting.
------------
Check into it more thoroughly. You will find that we picked up Arar because Canadian intelligence informed us of this guy's terror links. It was a mistake on their part. I'll take some of the heat for it, but I'm not taking the rap, as Michael Douglas said in "Black Rain".

An ally nation tells me a terrorist is coming through, I'm going to pick the son of a bitch up.

I've often wondered why I like you when you throw shots at my country, my president, and my God. I've come to realize why after this whole incident - you have a brass pair on you like two giant musk melons, and I respect that. Skol, you ballsy bastard!

Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:00:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I do believe this is my favorite shitfuck post of all time.

Mainly because, no offense, I generally don't like shitfuck posts...

Submitted by legallady (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:49:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

This was one of the best writings EVAR.
If I post here...will I be a person of interest?

Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:37:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

WOO EDMONTON! GO OILERS!

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:31:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Jesus loves you.

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:03:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:27:18 (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:06:46 (#)
Ranking: 0

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:03 (#)
Ranking: 0

Hahah! You got molested by George W.!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dom, you're the man and all that crap, but how the fuck is this situation funny?
-----------

Okay, SF, let's have the discussion nice and civilized like. I can't possibly deal with another guy ETS style, that's not why I come onto this site.

First and foremost, you threatened/promoted killing the single most powerful man on the planet, a guy that, despite any and all efforts, is going to be totally gone inside of two years. What exactly did you think was going to happen? Did you think the Secret Service was going to know you were kidding, or that you don't have any power at all to carry out such a threat? Seriously my friend, what did you expect to happen? You sound a little bit to me like a teenager that breaks curfew and is pissed about getting grounded. Obviously this is more serious than that. You talk a lot about freedom, and believe you me, nobody in the world cares about freedom more than I do. From what constitutional, divine, or other doctrine do you derive the right to threaten someone's life? Where are your freedoms being infringed? I'm not allowed to threaten the asshole who lives above me. Are you aggravated because you thought your citizenship would protect you and it didn't? I don't get the realationship you're making to your current situation and freedom.

As far as Arar go, you really should look to your own government. They handed him over to us and said "This guy has terrorist links." We believed them. BTW, make sure you vote in UM. You will fucking LOVE what I cooked up this round.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I didn't threaten the president, you'll notice (and this is the exact line I gave to the Feds) I abstained from using the first person, this was intentional.

I understand what you're saying here, and yeah, I kinda did figure that the Secret Service, with the billion dollar budget, highly trained agents and all the techmology you can handle WOULD be able to tell that I'm not a serious threat to anyone.

Obvioulsy they couldn't tell.

So what does that tell you? Do they need more funding? More agents? More techmology?

Freedom means a lot to you huh?

What about my freedom? Imagine it--I said something that a few million other people are thinking and because of it, my life has changed. Does saying those three little words amount to attacking America?

Obviously it does--your government's response to me is proof of it.

My point is that in the climate of fear, everyone is a target. Maybe the SS agent that scans this will decide YOU need to be checked up on--how do you like that prospect?

As for Arar--that's bullshit, he was detained by your governmnet because your governmnet suspected ties to Al Queda--we didn't hand him over to you. Not that my government is faultless, we let him sit in a Syrian jail long after we knew the truth. Which is even more disgusting.

UM? I'm not really into it this year, send me a link to your post I'll be sure to vote for you.

HA!





Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2006-10-22 18:03:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Liberals destroy freedoms as well.

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:44:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

That goes for those fucking religious fanatics too. Both sides.

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:43:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Whether it be a bullet to the back of his head, an axe to the pancreas or death by a corn
cob shoved up his anus, I will dance a jig when that pathetic piece of shit that
we have for a leader is no more.

Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:38:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I live in the United States, and while I may disagree with some of your opinions, I think
the Bushites have gone way too far with circumventing the Constitution, and most especially
in their treatment of you.

Nothing you wrote in any post is deserving of what you are now going through. People who
lie (Bush) use cheap tactics to justify their idiocy. Good luck.


Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:37:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Hey, if they are going to be reading your shit may as well give them something interesting
to read, eh?

Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:27:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:06:46 (#)
Ranking: 0

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:03 (#)
Ranking: 0

Hahah! You got molested by George W.!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dom, you're the man and all that crap, but how the fuck is this situation funny?
-----------

Okay, SF, let's have the discussion nice and civilized like. I can't possibly deal with another guy ETS style, that's not why I come onto this site.

First and foremost, you threatened/promoted killing the single most powerful man on the planet, a guy that, despite any and all efforts, is going to be totally gone inside of two years. What exactly did you think was going to happen? Did you think the Secret Service was going to know you were kidding, or that you don't have any power at all to carry out such a threat? Seriously my friend, what did you expect to happen? You sound a little bit to me like a teenager that breaks curfew and is pissed about getting grounded. Obviously this is more serious than that. You talk a lot about freedom, and believe you me, nobody in the world cares about freedom more than I do. From what constitutional, divine, or other doctrine do you derive the right to threaten someone's life? Where are your freedoms being infringed? I'm not allowed to threaten the asshole who lives above me. Are you aggravated because you thought your citizenship would protect you and it didn't? I don't get the realationship you're making to your current situation and freedom.

As far as Arar go, you really should look to your own government. They handed him over to us and said "This guy has terrorist links." We believed them. BTW, make sure you vote in UM. You will fucking LOVE what I cooked up this round.

Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:22:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I have heard of Arar before, actually. Silly of me to ask about charges when much more is at stake though. Good luck, dude.

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:12:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:50:08 (#)
Ranking: 2

That is incredible. One post that states what many of us wouldn't even bat an eye over and this is what happens.
Can you be lawfully charged in Canada for what you said, or are they just keeping close tabs on you?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charges don't matter anymore--this is the fact I've had to wrap my head around, but with the help of a few lawyers, criminal lawyers included, I'm understanding it.

The American government can label anyone as a danger, they don't need probable cause anymore, they don't even need the courts. Habeas Corpus is dead. International borders are dissolved.

With the help of some very prominent people here in Canada I have a network established--it includes authors, journalists, lawyers and politicians--if I suddenly dissappear, like Maher Arar did, people will know about it.

Oh, let me guess--you know nothing about Arar?

Read this: http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/arar/


Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:06:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Horrifying.

Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-10-22 17:04:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:45:17 (#)
Ranking: 2

"Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both." Benny Franklin

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Benjamin Franklin also said that we shouldnt enslave the blacks. He thought we should have sent them back to Africa. Not because he thought it was morally wrong but because he hated them and couldnt even stand their presence. He thought they were what kept America from truly becoming the city upon a hill and beacon of shining light that it should have been.


Good post anyway. I'm glad you're still around.

Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:58:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:50:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:45:17 (#)
Ranking: 2

"Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both." Benny Franklin

Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:50:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

That is incredible. One post that states what many of us wouldn't even bat an eye over and this is what happens.
Can you be lawfully charged in Canada for what you said, or are they just keeping close tabs on you?

Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:48:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I have nothing to say.

-Dave

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:46:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

domenad, you know you are just drinking the kool-aid, right?

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:45:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

"Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both." Benny Franklin

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:17:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

"The difference between a criminal and an outlaw is that while criminals frequently are victims, outlaws never are. Indeed the first step towards becoming a true outlaw is the REFUSAL to be victimised. All people who live subject to other peoples laws are victims. People who break laws out of greed, frustration or vengeance are victims. People who protest over laws in order to replace them with their own laws are victims (i.e.revolutionaries).

"Outlaws, however, live beyond the law. They don't merely live beyond the letter of the law - many businessmen, most politicians and all police do that - they live beyond the spirit of the law. In a sense then, they live beyond society. Their goal is to turn the tables on the very NATURE of society. When they succeed, they raise the exhilaration content of the universe. They even raise it a little bit when they fail. The outlaw is someone who cannot be 'GOTTEN', he can only be punished by other peoples attitudes.

........

"When freedom is outlawed, only outlaws will be free."

- Tom Robbins

Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:15:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:22:33 (#)
Ranking: 2

when the revolution comes, im on this guy's side

you are my hero

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

ShitFuck, sir... I salute you.

Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:15:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I hope the Bush administration wakes up one day choking on feces.

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:11:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Terrifying

Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:08:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

don't fuck with Gee-Dub.



Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:06:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:03 (#)
Ranking: 0

Hahah! You got molested by George W.!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dom, you're the man and all that crap, but how the fuck is this situation funny?



Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:06:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:06:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

P.S. God is a fucking faggot and Jesus fluffs my balls every night, Conservatives are a bunch of hand job artists and rapists of kids under the age of 18. George Bush is a pussy ass bitch leading a company of vote stealers and criminals in a campaign against humanity. Somewhere in time there is a noose being knotted, and it's got FOX news written all over it like a surprise ejaculation launched across the Whitehouse garden
==========

Awsome.

You've hit the nail on the head. This freedom that we have is a freedom that THEY have allowed us to believe we have.

Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

ohhh - our little shitfuck is growing up...

Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2006-10-22 16:03:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Hahah! You got molested by George W.!

Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:52:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i wish apologizing for my retarded government would actually help you out. i actually cried reading this.

didn't see that coming.

Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:52:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

UBER IS IN A SMALLER FONT AND I FUCKING LOVE IT, PLUS TWOS ALL AROUND!!!

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:36:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


Rob Berg, thank you for everything.


Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:34:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Noone has ever known real freedom. In every sense of the word, a constitution is an impairment of freedom. It restricts, constricts, subtracts from what one could do (usually for the better of all, but it still is an inhibition). I really wish people would stop using the word freedom like something that once was there, but was taken away. The grass has never been truly green People, stop eating those goddamn mushrooms.

Nicely written post, though. Makes me wonder, seeing as this wonderful place houses several of your kind, posting negative stuff about that Texan Bastard, shouldn't half of the users here be treated as potential terrorists? Write me down, mister FBI carnivore system, never wanted to go to America anyway.

The only freedom you ever had is in expanding your waists.

Submitted by bob (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:34:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Colbert couldnt have said it any better himself

Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:30:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2



Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:26:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


Oddly enough, when you're under investigation they tell you you are not under investigation. But then they proceed to investigate you, your friends and any animals you may or may not have kicked in a drunken rage.

Fortunatley, I never kick animals, I only piss on churches.


Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:25:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

You're not allowed in and I'm not allowed to leave. This is going to cut down our binge drinking options considerably.

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:22:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

when the revolution comes, im on this guy's side

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:21:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

you are my hero

Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-10-22 15:18:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Is there a news link to this? Could I search your name on a "Potential Threat" database?


The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy how to
be a man! Let's see; don't tattle, always make fun of those different
from you, never say anything unless you're sure everyone feels exactly
the same way you do.

-- Homer Simpson
Bart the General