Lies I have told in life, and the truths behind them. (3339 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.16 on 168 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jay Peg (View user info) at 2006-10-22 19:27:03 EDT
Like I said before, I'm coming to the realization that I'm an almost pathological liar.
I find myself and my life uninteresting, so when I am talking with people I have just met, or people who have no real way of verifying something, I lie to make myself sound better.
Sometimes the lies are outright fabrications.
Sometimes they have a basis of truth, and are exaggerated.
And yes, I've told a TON of lies here on Ubersite.
So many, in fact, I honestly can not think of them all.
But here are some of the ones I can really remember.
LIE: I volunteer 10-15 hours a week for the Colorado Democratic Party, and at times, I help organize and lead small events.
TRUTH: For 8 weeks a year before election cycles, I do mailers. Three or four times an election cycle, I cold call. And on election day, I help out where I can with whatever they need. I'm just a peon there.
-----
LIE: I'm the front desk manager at my hotel.
TRUTH: I'm FDM-in-training. Eventually in the next few months I *will* be a manager, but I'm not yet.
-----
LIE: I had scholarship offers to a could of 1-AA schools, but I lost them when I dropped out of high school.
TRUTH: I was SCOUTED by a few 1-AA schools my junior year in HS, but I dropped out after my second junior year, which was my 4th year of eligability.
-----
LIE: Just about everything I've ever said here about relationships.
TRUTH: In the almost 2 years I'e been posting here, I've had 2 girlfriends. One was for a few months, one was for about 6. Honest truth, and go ahead and cringe ahead of time, I've only had sex 4 times in the past two years.
Yes Caul, being overweight DOES fuck with your libido.
-----
I'm sure I've also said things about traveling around or whatever, and have had to back out at the last minutes because "something came up" or whatever. Truth be told, I don't make a lot of money, and I'm shitty at saving for things. I impule buy a lot of shit like books and CD's and shit, but I can't seem to save up and buy decent shit for my apartment, let alone save up a few grand for a trip out to London to see folks.
-----
Off the top of my head, those are the major lies I can remember without being reminded.
to everyone I've lied to, I'm sorry.
Also, and you don't have to or anything, but if you think I might have lied about something, whatever it is, I'll do my best to answer it.
User Reviews
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2009-03-30 13:02:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
aka: http://www.ubersite.com/u/DTII
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-03-30 12:44:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
classic
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-03-28 01:36:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw...you just stretched the truth a tad.
Go to sleep and wake up without wood. {nose-heh}
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-03-28 01:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This was a great post.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-08-13 15:40:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lmao
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-08-13 15:00:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
JAYPEG FTW
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-08-04 15:22:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Last year you said something about being able to make good picks for NFL betting.
I think we all know how that turned out.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2007-08-04 14:28:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hahahahhaha I never rated this!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-03-14 23:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i've just read this entire thing.
well worth the time invested.
+2 for all the hate.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-11-17 13:22:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-17 13:13:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
x
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-17 13:13:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
lol @ theuniter
Submitted by GMCrayon (user info) at 2006-11-17 10:24:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-11-16 22:50:23 (#)
Ranking: 0
LIE: I volunteer 10-15 hours a week for the Colorado Democratic Party, and at times, I help organize and lead small events.
TRUTH: For 8 weeks a year before election cycles, I do mailers. Three or four times an election cycle, I cold call. And on election day, I help out where I can with whatever they need. I'm just a peon there.
THE REAL TRUTH: On election day, I slash the tires on the van the Republican party uses to take senior citizens to the polls and the Dems let me rummage through the dumpster for old donuts.
-----
LIE: I'm the front desk manager at my hotel.
TRUTH: I'm FDM-in-training. Eventually in the next few months I *will* be a manager, but I'm not yet.
THE REAL TRUTH: I dispose of the used condoms between "guests" in the "hourly" rooms. They let me keep the full ones.
-----
LIE: I had scholarship offers to a couple of 1-AA schools, but I lost them when I dropped out of high school.
TRUTH: I was SCOUTED by a few 1-AA schools my junior year in HS, but I dropped out after my second junior year, which was my 4th year of eligibility.
THE REAL TRUTH: I begged to be assistant trainer, which consisted of rubbing out leg cramps and hand washing the jock straps, but was kicked out of school when the coach caught me masturbating in the whirlpool to a picture of Barry Sanders.
-----
LIE: Just about everything I've ever said here about relationships.
TRUTH: In the almost 2 years I'e been posting here, I've had 2 girlfriends. One was for a few months, one was for about 6. Honest truth, and go ahead and cringe ahead of time, I've only had sex 4 times in the past two years.
Yes Caul, being overweight DOES fuck with your libido.
THE REAL TRUTH: I've never had sex with a human female, but I did rub one out really quick in the hospital when my Grammaw died before I called the nurse. I think some got in her mustache, which is almost a blow job, I think.
________________________________________________
HAHAHAHAHA! B@W!
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-11-16 22:50:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
LIE: I volunteer 10-15 hours a week for the Colorado Democratic Party, and at times, I help organize and lead small events.
TRUTH: For 8 weeks a year before election cycles, I do mailers. Three or four times an election cycle, I cold call. And on election day, I help out where I can with whatever they need. I'm just a peon there.
THE REAL TRUTH: On election day, I slash the tires on the van the Republican party uses to take senior citizens to the polls and the Dems let me rummage through the dumpster for old donuts.
-----
LIE: I'm the front desk manager at my hotel.
TRUTH: I'm FDM-in-training. Eventually in the next few months I *will* be a manager, but I'm not yet.
THE REAL TRUTH: I dispose of the used condoms between "guests" in the "hourly" rooms. They let me keep the full ones.
-----
LIE: I had scholarship offers to a couple of 1-AA schools, but I lost them when I dropped out of high school.
TRUTH: I was SCOUTED by a few 1-AA schools my junior year in HS, but I dropped out after my second junior year, which was my 4th year of eligibility.
THE REAL TRUTH: I begged to be assistant trainer, which consisted of rubbing out leg cramps and hand washing the jock straps, but was kicked out of school when the coach caught me masturbating in the whirlpool to a picture of Barry Sanders.
-----
LIE: Just about everything I've ever said here about relationships.
TRUTH: In the almost 2 years I'e been posting here, I've had 2 girlfriends. One was for a few months, one was for about 6. Honest truth, and go ahead and cringe ahead of time, I've only had sex 4 times in the past two years.
Yes Caul, being overweight DOES fuck with your libido.
THE REAL TRUTH: I've never had sex with a human female, but I did rub one out really quick in the hospital when my Grammaw died before I called the nurse. I think some got in her mustache, which is almost a blow job, I think.
Submitted by cstick3 (user info) at 2006-11-16 21:55:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
the stupid ass picture cost you a +2
otherwise, it is great you are coming clean with yourself that your life sucks so bad you have to lie to complete strangers on the internet
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-16 21:48:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
being overweight DOES fuck with your libido.
------------
classic denial
being overweight affects your abilty to score, not your libido.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-13 01:02:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was lamer than Dr Weinheimer in Naked Gun 2 1/2
Submitted by foster (user info) at 2006-11-11 11:58:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95651
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-10-27 16:44:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-10-23 04:06:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Jay is at least trying to make his life different - somehow. He's aware it's not great and wants it to be better. That's admirable.
Filthy has spent the last two years holding together a long distance relationship because she believes that when you're in love, you make the effort, no matter how hard or painful it may be, and no matter what anyone else thinks of it. That's admirable.
Caul is the first one to laugh at himself, to be amused by his macho bullshit posturings, to poke fun at his lifestyle, his past, his nationality. He's as ready to laugh at himself as he is to laugh at anybody else. That's admirable.
There's not one of you here that isn't worthy of some measure of respect, in some aspect of your lives. I don't tell you this in some half-assed diplomatic effort to have you hold hands and sing hymns - I'm not bright, but I'm not naive, either. I only tell you this so that you're aware of it.
Carry on.
-------
This is probably the most intelligent reviw on Uber ever.
It also makes sense.
What is happening here?
I bow down to your pure superbness Miss/Ms/Mrs Circe.
I have nothing more to say,
I am teh drinked.
-Dave
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-27 11:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
He's calling me JFag.
I should jump off a bridge now.
Submitted by GetNakeddd (user info) at 2006-10-26 16:49:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That is the worst prosthetic nose I have ever seen
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-26 10:33:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That brief synopsis below, while totally accurate, can also be used with 100% accuracy to describe another dipshit Uberite....the author himself, OathMeal.
That's how he was able to describe this type of loser in such amazing detail. He lives it every day.
Pot, meet kettle. Kettle is also gay.
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-26 10:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Let's look at the facts:
1. JFag is a high school dropout.
2. JFag cannot be trusted, on account of his own admissions here.
3. JFag openly admits to not having any foundation for why he berates others (spite and boredom don't qualify)
4. JFag's idea of rigorous exercise is walking around in a park.
5. JFag seeks acceptance and attention by pitying himself before all of us.
And finally ...
6. JFag doesn't seem to realize that true friends won't be realized from the use of a website and some childish anger.
JFag, you're a lonely man. You're friendless, fat, unhealthy, uneducated, slovenly, boring, apathetic, uncouth, depressed, immature, ignorant and unliked.
If you truly wish to be happy, change everything about yourself.
And I do mean, everything.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-10-26 05:21:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:22:00 (#)
Ranking: 0
That's a good point.
*sniff*
But I've always showered alone.
*sniff*
Damn phuzzy for being a hot foreigner with an equally hot accent.
----
DUDE. What the fuck?
Submitted by PMN (user info) at 2006-10-26 00:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
we are not gonna read this - you fat fucker you get on my nerves
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-25 17:27:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
holy shit this was one huge clusterfuck
the only one with half a brain was Circe (and maybe rob b)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 17:19:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah...OK..toss your horseshit into that small group of prime reviews in what amounts to, one of the worst posts in internet history..
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-25 17:12:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ahem
mine too
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:59:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Good God, this post and the reviews - with the exception of mine and surprisingly, Caul's - are the epitome of patheticness.
Submitted by JohnnyMac (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:57:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I was with you right up until you mentioned your impotance.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Are I the Antichrist, you smell dump truck? Crikey one which load of ZAMMO! ON SMACK! The winter of our disco is now! Quack Quack, pay attention me to smell hair.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:26:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
But Me I have people who try and go out of there way to be friends with me, and take care of me and I cut them off, and throw them away with no second thought. I feel sad for this but I would rather have no one and not feel than have people and pine away for there love. People love me but I cant love them back. My heart won't let me.
-----
I getcha. I really kinda want people to like and need me, and when I'm kicking around alone, it sucks. But then again, there are times where I'm as happy as I can be while being alone, and I wonder why I feel the need to be around people.
And the lying and shit is somehow (I really don't know or understand how) tied into this. I want to be alone at times, so I lie to push folks away, and then I want to be around folks and be in the middle of this swirl of activity, so I lie to try and seem more interesting or important or something.
I honestly can't explain why I do a lot of the things I do. I mean, I KNOW I do them, I KNOW my reasoning at the TIME but I really don't get the underlying "why" of it beyond what's above this. All I know is that it ain't right, and it needs finxing and changing, which is a step in the right direction, I suppose.
Submitted by PerkMan (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:17:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It's funny you long for companionship from friends, and people. You everything you do to get it which includes lying, and doing what they ask of you to only at the end of the day have nothing.
But Me I have people who try and go out of there way to be friends with me, and take care of me and I cut them off, and throw them away with no second thought. I feel sad for this but I would rather have no one and not feel than have people and pine away for there love. People love me but I cant love them back. My heart won't let me.
It;'s fucked up I toss friends away like scraps and this guy wishes he had the friends I toss away..
It's sad. God screwed us both...
All hate aside Jaypig. i hope you get better. I don't take pleasure in others pain anymore. ETS, or Caul, or indoninja, or jeaneee and anyone else rate my latest post. I asked a question there and I want to know what you all think.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:11:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Next, why don't you try being nice for a whole week?
I bet it would be good for your tarnished empty soul.
(Oh, and I bet it will be much easier to start forgiving yourself once you stop acting like a fucking retard.)
-----------------------------------
I'm actually a generally nice person, Rob.
Shocking, I know, but true.
I only seem to be an asshole here, either out of spite, boredom, or pure unadulterated discontent with the masses.
Mainly spite and boredom, though.
Count the people I'm a dick to here, and then count the people to whom i am either ambivalent or on very good terms with. the only folks I can tack onto the "dick" list are ETS(and not even as much anymore, I think we have a semi-truce going), Oath, Caul, perk, PiB/GM/whatever and their ilk. Oh, and occasionally Apollo and you and a few others who I ride the fence about.
But people only notice the asshole, ya know? I KNOW that in the past, Caul wasn't as vitrolic, but shit if I can remember it. Not because it was so long ago, but because it doesn't stand out. Not saying it's good/bad, just sayin' is all.
Nice doesn't get noticed, even if it's a majority.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
maybe jay, but how can we know you're not lying?
we can't.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:48:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought rob_berg was ETS?
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:39:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is why I like Rob Berg.
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
V
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:37:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:15:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, Rob, I actually missed that.
To be honest, I don't care if other people forgive me for any lying or anything.
This sounds hokey as shit, but I need to forgive myself, and that's the only one who matters.
And to do that, I need to acknowledge the shit I've fucked up, and this is a decent way of doing so.
---
This is precisely why people don't like you Mr. Greening.
You know that right?
No matter how much malice, advice, pleading, name-calling, offers, threats are slung your way - you seem unable or unwilling to let yourself comprehend, digest, or reflect on ANY of it and inexplicably continue to be an annoying human being.
I respect that.
You are content on being "yourself" in all of your miserable fucking glory and that is a rare thing in this world.
Do me a favour and take out a pen and write this out on a piece of your hotel stationary and tape it to your monitor:
Name calling is boring.
Stalking people is pathetic.
Lies are stupid and pointless.
Next, why don't you try being nice for a whole week?
I bet it would be good for your tarnished empty soul.
(Oh, and I bet it will be much easier to start forgiving yourself once you stop acting like a fucking retard.)
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Which one?
The risperdol (which I can show you the diagnosis sheet taking me off)
The baritone voice (which I can have you call someone I've talked to) ((And no, you can't call me, I don't need stalkers)
The moobs (they have no definition, so they can't be bitch tits.)
Or the fact I can see a man as attractive, and yet not lust after him like a nun to Jesus? (I don't expect you to understand this, since you blow every 6-packed man who pins you down in a bathroom)
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:24:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:48:13 (#)
Ranking: 0
Remember, I'm not ON meds anymore. I got off the Risperdol alomst 8 weeks ago.
Also, the voice is a barritone.
Third, I have moobs, not bitch tits. It's more Ric Flair, less Tony Little.
Fourth, like I said, I can say a man is attractive, and not have the thought of sucking cock in my head.
===
*inserts this into jay's big list of lies*
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:23:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
why would i hit the clubs?
i have a pretty girlfriend that makes 5 times my salary and that sucks my cock everyday.
you have your ugly self to deal with with 5 mental diseases and a micro penis.
you pwn me jay, you really do.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:15:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, Rob, I actually missed that.
To be honest, I don't care if other people forgive me for any lying or anything.
This sounds hokey as shit, but I need to forgive myself, and that's the only one who matters.
And to do that, I need to acknowledge the shit I've fucked up, and this is a decent way of doing so.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:07:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94743#2194413
---
...or not.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
C'mon now, Caul.
We all know you hit the club scene, hoping to find some nubile young buck who's just drunk enough or X'd out enough to try new things in his life.
Quit masturbaing to ther words nubile young buck, you sick fuck.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:55:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
the only times i see an attractive man i happen to be in front of a mirror.
now stfu you fat fucking virgin.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:48:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't make assumptions, Caul, you look dumb in doing so.
Remember, I'm not ON meds anymore. I got off the Risperdol alomst 8 weeks ago.
Also, the voice is a barritone.
Third, I have moobs, not bitch tits. It's more Ric Flair, less Tony Little.
Fourth, like I said, I can say a man is attractive, and not have the thought of sucking cock in my head.
I'm pretty sure every time you see a man you find attractive, you imagine your tonsils coated in protein.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:47:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OK...I'm evening things up by pissing on everyone's cell phones around the office today.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:35:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
how would you know jay? you are asexual.
perhaps you're gayer than i am but since you have zero libido because of your morbid obesity and cocktails of meds, i guess we'll never know. but with your soprano voice, bitch tits and weak character, you'd make a decent faggot.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:19:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aw Caul, see, I'm able to say a man is attractive without wanting to suck his cock.
I don't know if you are, though.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:10:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my bad - should have said "At least weekly"
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:02:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
clean their bathrooms WEEKLY?
you dirty bitch.
3 times a week more like.
when the maid comes.
goddamn mexicans are cheap. good old texas.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:00:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
excuse me a moment as I wipe my desk and computer down with clorox wipes, and then use some purell...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:58:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Caul - statistically, toilets also tend to be cleaner than cell-phones.
HOWEVER - that is based on the cleaning habits of most people. Most don't ever clean desk-tops or keyboards, but do clean thier bathrooms weekly.
However, if you assume the desk, keyboard, cell phone, and toilet are cleaned with the same regularity, the toilet will be germier.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:53:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:50:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Splashes, Jay... splashes.
And I have never let any of my animals drink out of the toilet. It's gross - germy, filthy, everything.
If it weren't, what's to say you shouldn't wash your face or brush your teeth using the toilet bowl water?
===
a toilet is actually cleaner than a keyboard and a mouse which register the highest germ and bacteria count in a house. jay's keyboard also has a huge sperm count from all that gay bears porn.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:52:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Buahauahauahahahah
(See below)
Also, fag below, I guess.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:22:00 (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn phuzzy for being a hot foreigner with an equally hot accent.
===
OMG! JAY IS GAY! LOLOLOL! THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING EVER!
HEY JAY! GUESS WHAT! YOU ARE GAY! HOLY FUCKING TABARNAK, ROFL!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:50:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Splashes, Jay... splashes.
And I have never let any of my animals drink out of the toilet. It's gross - germy, filthy, everything.
If it weren't, what's to say you shouldn't wash your face or brush your teeth using the toilet bowl water?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:47:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
But Crystle, if you pee early in the shower, it's all washed away.
I mean, I pee in my toilet a few times a day, but I don't worry about my cats lapping up urine, because it's done been flushed, kiddo. :-)
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:35:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Also - it's not just people in the shower WITH you.
It's the people who shower AFTER you.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:34:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a shame he's so far away, Jay...
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:27:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not reading all the reviews, and I'll be nice here for the first time in a long while.
I don't think that you're a liar, just a dreamer. Dreams become goals. Goals become reality. yadda yadda yadda
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:22:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's a good point.
*sniff*
But I've always showered alone.
*sniff*
Damn phuzzy for being a hot foreigner with an equally hot accent.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:00:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
but Jay - when you're not the only one using that shower, it changes things!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:49:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
@phuzzy: It's not like you're pissing on yourself or someone else or anything like that. Just pee towards the drain, and you're good.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:32:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-24 22:58:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.coverpop.com/whitney/whitneyChromatic.swf
I stares at that shit for 5 minutes waiting for a face to jump out and scare the fuck out of me.
----
I was at work last night and saw that. It's a 3 minute cycle, 48 dots. The inside dot goes around 48 times, the 2nd goes 47, 3rd goes 46 etc etc etc and the biggest dot goes once.
I just sat and watched it for about 10 minutes, timed one cycle and worked it all out...
THAT is the kind of shit that I like to do. See something, figure out as much as I can about it...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 11:11:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:31:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
doesn't everyone pee in the shower?
Yeah, but do you also poop in the shower? I do.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:32:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-24 22:58:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.coverpop.com/whitney/whitneyChromatic.swf
This.
Is.
Awesome.
_________
I stares at that shit for 5 minutes waiting for a face to jump out and scare the fuck out of me.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:31:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
doesn't everyone pee in the shower?
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:10:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
NOOIT BRU! THAT'S HECTIC. GROSS MAN!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 09:00:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH PEEING WHILST SHOWERING! JUST MAKE SURE YOU DON'T PEE ON A WALL OR SOMETHING! PEE TOWARDS THE DRAIN, AND ALL IS WELL!
:-)
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-10-25 05:13:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was just really disappointed in you when you told me you pee in the shower.
Submitted by lordofthepost (user info) at 2006-10-24 23:06:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We all lie, its what separates us from primates...
http://youtube.com/watch?v=B5cM1YY1AGI&mode=related&search=
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-24 22:58:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.coverpop.com/whitney/whitneyChromatic.swf
This.
Is.
Awesome.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2006-10-24 12:48:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jesus fucking christ. get a hobby. for the love of god, jay, get a fucking hobby.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-24 00:00:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Caul, if I was talking to you, I would have addressed you.
I was replying to something that someone other than you said.
Now quit acting like a 5 years old who's pissed they're not getting mommies attention.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 23:33:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
NO ONE CARES!
SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 23:28:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Indo: We're a bit bigger in staff, but not in rooms. 86 rooms, but a staff of 12 desk and porter for meeting rooms, and I wanna say 8-10 housekeepers w/ 1 housekeeping supervisor. Sales staff of 3 with a sales manager, front desk manager and general manager. Sales manager is in charge of the 3 folks who are ONLY porters and the rest of the sales staff, front desk is in charge of the other 9, as well as some of the housekeeping stuff like supply ordering and scheduling.
And Shlongy, if you think I'm lying about any of that, I'm sure you can call the franchisee, Rocky Mountain Wingate, and they'll confirm the dates and rough needs. I don't know exact week/day stuff about when they'll open, because I'm not building the things, but my GM keeps me up-to-date with what's going on so I'm not thrown for a loop if there's a setback in the schedule or anything.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-10-23 21:13:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:10:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, Apollo, this might shock you, but you DO need a degree in Hotel Management. Most hotels accept an Associates Degree, but larger hotels require the bachelors.
Here's the best thing to me, the hotel is training me and giving me the position WITHOUT the degree, and when I get to whichever hotel they send me to, they'll pay for half my school.
There's a lot more to it than you see on the front end. Even a small hotel is a 5 million dollar a year business.
---------------------
I took a semester off of school and in two months they made me the front desk manager of a Hotel. It was a small place with 100 about units, two clerks at a time and 10 cleaning staff.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 20:37:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
no one cares about your 'career' plans/lies.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-23 20:36:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
A) Nobody cares, except you apparently
2) Sounds like more of the same ol' j in that LAST review
3) Shut the fuck up for ONCE
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 20:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nope, Apollo. That's all truth.
I'll be moving to either Henderson, Nevada or St. George, Utah (with a very small chance I stay in Denver and they move the manager here to one of those hotels) by some time near the end of the first quarter next year. The Henderson property is (I believe) just about finished with external finishing, and is now starting to do inside work like electrical/plumbing/whatnot while the St. George property is about 3 months behind that, and are currently halfway or so through framing.
The Henderson hotel should be open by April, which means management and sales needs to be in place by the end of February so we can start the sales blitzing, hiring of staff and training. Thankfully, it's Las Vegas, so there's not dearth of people who have hotel/hospitality experience. Downside, I'm not quite sure if they need to be union. I know they do if they work in a hotel/casino, but I have no idea if there is no casino.
As for St. George, they're more than likely going to open in late 2nd quarter, like July or so, depending on what winter does to the construction schedule. If that's the case, they need maangement in place by June. The lead time is different, because the focus of the hotel would be more leisure and less business like the Denver and Henderson properties. Folks driving along I-15 to Vegas or into Utah for Moab or SLC. Downside THERE is that the town is VERY VERY Mormon, and they actually have blue laws against WORKING on Sundays. We'd need a variance to have staff there.
<sarcasm>Plus, it's a dry county, so I'd have to go about 40 miles for beer to drown my sorrowful life. </sarcasm>
Aaaaaaaaaand if I stay in Denver, which is a longshot, but it would be nice, I can just slide into the office and face a small mutiny of staff who can't stand the idea of me being their boss, because I actually want them to you know, work and shit.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:22:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:10:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, Apollo, this might shock you, but you DO need a degree in Hotel Management. Most hotels accept an Associates Degree, but larger hotels require the bachelors.
Here's the best thing to me, the hotel is training me and giving me the position WITHOUT the degree, and when I get to whichever hotel they send me to, they'll pay for half my school.
There's a lot more to it than you see on the front end. Even a small hotel is a 5 million dollar a year business. ""
is this going on the next edition of 'lies i've told on ubersite'?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:12:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you,re a high school drop out...everything looks like a degree to you
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:10:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, Apollo, this might shock you, but you DO need a degree in Hotel Management. Most hotels accept an Associates Degree, but larger hotels require the bachelors.
Here's the best thing to me, the hotel is training me and giving me the position WITHOUT the degree, and when I get to whichever hotel they send me to, they'll pay for half my school.
There's a lot more to it than you see on the front end. Even a small hotel is a 5 million dollar a year business.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-23 18:00:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
LIE: You regularly (and crudely) bash ghey menz on Ubersite.
TRUTH: You long to be with your male Quebecois lover!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:46:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
how much training can it take to be a 'FDM'?
here's the phone.
here's the credit card swipy machine.
here's the computer with the rooms on.
CONGRATS YOU HAVE YOUR FDM DEGREE!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 16:33:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
TRUTH: I'm FDM-in-training."""
i like how you use an abbreviation to sound like a CEO.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2006-10-23 15:13:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:26:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Get ready for some pictures of me to smoke you, zoolander. We're about to have a model off.
===
bring it!
*makes self vomit*
=======
WOOOO
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-23 11:41:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94779
you inspired me Jason.
THE TRUTH WILL OUT!
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-10-23 11:36:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-23 11:02:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:39:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:30:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
Good point, Jay; but I'd say that delivery and presentation are what people come for.
Any new user can post the funniest post ever to grace this site in one giant block of text and it would be disregarded without a second glance. Similarily, if one only writes about how he's a compulsive liar and doesn't bring any actual substance worthy of positive attention to the table this person has not delivered a good post.
Whether or not you care about people's opinion is your choice, you're getting them regardless. But then again, you could just be lying about that statement as well.
------
I agree, they want delivery and presentation, but be honest, if I did clean shit up and posted these in story form etc etc, do you think folks like Caul, Apollo, Aj, Filthy et al. would actually change their rating?
No, they wouldn't. People have been rating "me" and not my "work" for damn near a year now. CIP is the aborted Afterlife series.
I got tired of watching posts go from 1.9 on 15 reviews to 1.2 on 22 reviews because they just came in, clicked ranked and left.
I got tired of watching posts over a year old go from 1.8 to 0.8 because people used 5 alters to bring down my score because I called their "OMFG ju don no I be pwnzering ju" posts crap. """
you have no 'work' you deluded fat fuck.
Submitted by Cadrach (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:54:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:47:56 (#)
Ranking: -2
pathetic.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:52:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice "young Shlongy" camwhore at the end.
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2006-10-23 10:28:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"..................Like I said before, I'm coming to the realization that I'm an almost pathological liar.............."
so, if youre lying about telling the truth, and the truth is a lie, but, paradoxically the lie is a lie, thus being truth...
fuck. i need a drink.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:47:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
pathetic.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-10-23 09:32:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-10-23 04:06:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
There's not one of you here that isn't worthy of some measure of respect, in some aspect of your lives. I don't tell you this in some half-assed diplomatic effort to have you hold hands and sing hymns - I'm not bright, but I'm not naive, either. I only tell you this so that you're aware of it.
Carry on.
--------
the dog whisperer has spoken. :D
good luck jay. it's hard to break bad habits.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-23 08:40:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have the opposite problem with Ubersite - I am far too honest on here, to the point that I have to hide this place's existence from most of my friends and family.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-10-23 08:36:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
While this wasn't the point of the post, I also have noticed recently that I am a pathological liar, though not consciously or about important things. The example I noticed a few nights ago was when I was at a party and idly trying to sell a spare concert ticket (IF ANYONE WANTS A SINGLE TICKET TO PEARL JAM IN BRISBANE ON FRIDAY NOVEMBER 10TH FOR $80 EMAIL THORPE AT THORPE87.at.GMAIL.COM). Someone said they weren't interested, but maybe the guy over in the corner would be, and had I asked him. Instead of saying I hadn't I just said "Yeah, he doesn't want it", because I couldn't be arsed getting up and going over there yet, and making the required conversational effort to explain that I hadn't but would be in the near future and thanks for telling me etc. I did it so effortlessly it can't be good.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2006-10-23 04:06:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jay is at least trying to make his life different - somehow. He's aware it's not great and wants it to be better. That's admirable.
Filthy has spent the last two years holding together a long distance relationship because she believes that when you're in love, you make the effort, no matter how hard or painful it may be, and no matter what anyone else thinks of it. That's admirable.
Caul is the first one to laugh at himself, to be amused by his macho bullshit posturings, to poke fun at his lifestyle, his past, his nationality. He's as ready to laugh at himself as he is to laugh at anybody else. That's admirable.
There's not one of you here that isn't worthy of some measure of respect, in some aspect of your lives. I don't tell you this in some half-assed diplomatic effort to have you hold hands and sing hymns - I'm not bright, but I'm not naive, either. I only tell you this so that you're aware of it.
Carry on.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 02:51:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
They need me to feel better about themselves.
"Shit man, at least I'm not JayPeg, I got that goin' for me."
They don't get the feeling that comes with "Shit man, I am *me*, so I got that goin' for me." """
hahahahaha...you are the best entertainment. i don,t even know where to begin with this.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-10-23 02:36:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:43:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you don't have your word, you are truly nothing.
If you would like to be a better person, don't 'try'... just be better. You have pissed off and alienated almost everyone you have come into contact with on this wretched little site - to expect forgiveness or any sort of latitude from the vast majority of them is delusional.
You have been a miserable human being because you COULD be miserable. That is the bottom line fella. You can ascribe it to whatever convenient disorder or management issue you most certainly have - but ultimately it was you who punched those little keys and perpetuated this mountain of stupidity that was/is 'jgreening' and whatever 'alters' you may or may not have had.
I, for one, appreciate your honesty, and especially your candid acknowledgements of your pathetic behaviour both on Ubersite and in your own tragic life.
I am also rooting for you to transcend all the bullshit you have manufactured and truly hope you surprise us all by not being such a frustrating pain in the ass.
Good luck.
Submitted by HawthorneHeights (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:40:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh My God LIES???
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94758
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:39:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:30:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
Good point, Jay; but I'd say that delivery and presentation are what people come for.
Any new user can post the funniest post ever to grace this site in one giant block of text and it would be disregarded without a second glance. Similarily, if one only writes about how he's a compulsive liar and doesn't bring any actual substance worthy of positive attention to the table this person has not delivered a good post.
Whether or not you care about people's opinion is your choice, you're getting them regardless. But then again, you could just be lying about that statement as well.
------
I agree, they want delivery and presentation, but be honest, if I did clean shit up and posted these in story form etc etc, do you think folks like Caul, Apollo, Aj, Filthy et al. would actually change their rating?
No, they wouldn't. People have been rating "me" and not my "work" for damn near a year now. CIP is the aborted Afterlife series.
I got tired of watching posts go from 1.9 on 15 reviews to 1.2 on 22 reviews because they just came in, clicked ranked and left.
I got tired of watching posts over a year old go from 1.8 to 0.8 because people used 5 alters to bring down my score because I called their "OMFG ju don no I be pwnzering ju" posts crap.
If I weren't stuborn as fuck, I would leave.
Shit, I still might after I finish putting the rest of this to keyboard and electron.
Blows me away, people feel the need to absolutly try and destroy people because they think they're not as worthy of humanity as others. I'm a fucking basket case who takes abuse like a Timex, and there's still a part of my that pities them, because they NEED to feel superior for some reason. They can't live without it.
Anyway.
I can assume that while I wrote this, I got another 5-6 reviews from FA and Caul and maybe someone who came home from work and saw this.
Know why I know that?
Because it's like clockwork.
They need me to feel better about themselves.
"Shit man, at least I'm not JayPeg, I got that goin' for me."
They don't get the feeling that comes with "Shit man, I am *me*, so I got that goin' for me."
It's a nice feeling, no matter how fucked up am or how much I'e fucked up my life.
To be honest, it's blue-green. And blue-green kicks ass.
Submitted by Serious_Melvin (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:33:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahaa, if someone asked me to summarize ubersite, I would point to this post and all of its comments. this is great.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-23 01:10:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
filthy, stfu and go bathe your dirty husband.
you travelled oversea to get married with a fucking 30 years old deluded failure. as retarded as jaypig is, you are in no position to say anything.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:51:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus. Fight the tide, not find the tide.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:51:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*speechless*
This website is fucking weird.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
As much as I hate to correct the yellow dart, because he's on my limited list of sensible people on this insane site, I'm not criticising this post because I don't want to hear about your life or choices, jay. In fact, the confessional, throwing it all out there posts are what I love about this site. Shit, that's 90% of what I used to post when I actually posted something I wrote.
But this isn't a look into your head. It's a laundry list of lies that seemingly has no feeling or passion behind it. If you were telling us something we didn't know, great, but I don't think any of the revelations here will come as a great suprise to anyone but (apparently) yourself. If I had even an inkling of a suspicion that you were being real for a second, I'd plus two this into oblivion and stick my tongue far enough up your arse to steal your chewing gum, but it just comes off as yet another stale, meaningless session of me, me, me that you don't really mean.
And before you're too quick to criticise the over-exposure of my personal life on this site, let me assure you that it wasn't always that way and a lot of things that are now very public were intentionally kept private for a very long time. If I had my way, none of you would know anything about it, but if you can't find the tide you might as well flow with it. I'll remind you that when I was considerably less open about it all than I am today, you yourself would go out of your way to bring it up in every situation to score cheap points, so I'm black and you're a kettle here dude. We're both in the same shameful boat on that score.
You want to make amends or come clean, then do so. But for fucks sake mean it and inject a bit of feeling into it. Otherwise you're not just wasting our time - you're wasting yours.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:46:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's true what I say is false.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A996942
"A study carried out by psychologist Robert Feldman revealed that most people lied in everyday conversation to appear more competent and more likable to people they are trying to impress. He found that 60% of people lied at least once during a ten-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.
People often lie about things trying to feel better about themselves.
- Charles Ford, Psychiatry professor at the University of Alabama School of Medicine and author of Lies! Lies! Lies! - The Psychology of Deceit
We are all human. Deep inside, we all have a longing to be liked, to be accepted by a certain clique. We want people to look up to us, to respect us, to treat us as equals or better. At the same time, many of us, from brutal years of childhood, have acquired a certain sense of inadequacy - a feeling that we are just not good enough to measure up to people's expectations. We feel that our lives are in severe need of excitement and glamour, that we are the most boring people on earth. So what do we do when we meet somebody whom we wish to impress, or are desperately seeking approval from? We lie."
...
"However, the Internet is also a wonderful playground for the human imagination. People who had stopped role-playing and making fairy tales in their childhood suddenly find the avenue to do so again on the Internet. You could be anybody at all, anybody you ever wanted to be - and better still, there is no one to question you about what you are doing. There is a certain sense of freedom in living your dreams where there is nobody to be critical about them."
...
"But what about compulsive lying? There are those who are compulsive liars, who are compelled to tell lies even when it would do them no good, or when the truth would serve them better. These are people who say they'd bought a certain item from Shop X when in fact they'd obtained them from Shop Y; people who would say that they had been to a certain place even when they have not. How does it profit these people to lie?
Paul Ekman, a psychiatry professor from the University of California, San Francisco, attributes this to 'duping delight'. People who tell such lies do so not to get out of trouble, but for fun. For them, lying is like a drug that provides an adrenalin surge or a 'kick' sensation, and the feeling of being able to control the person they are lying to.
However, there are individuals who seem to lie automatically without the intention to deceive. Jerald Jellison, a psychology professor at the University of Southern California, suggests that this may be due to momentum. A person who gets away with his first lie may be carried by the momentum of how easy it is to slip a lie past people. The second time around, it gets easier to repeat the lie with embellishments. The more you get away with it, the more you lie. And before you know it, lying has become second nature."
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:30:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Good point, Jay; but I'd say that delivery and presentation are what people come for.
Any new user can post the funniest post ever to grace this site in one giant block of text and it would be disregarded without a second glance. Similarily, if one only writes about how he's a compulsive liar and doesn't bring any actual substance worthy of positive attention to the table this person has not delivered a good post.
Whether or not you care about people's opinion is your choice, you're getting them regardless. But then again, you could just be lying about that statement as well.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The manner in which she's criticising Jay is more along the lines of: we just don't want to hear about how his life is unfolding or how he's living his.
-----
But her saying that is a pretty nice double standard that's all over Uber.
Folks don't want to hear about other folks, but they love to talk about themselves.
There are thousands of posts about peoples lives that have enthralled people, even from someone like Fat Tony.
So people don't like me, and don't want to hear about mine.
Too bad for them, then, I guess. They don't HAVE to click it and read it. They choose to.
Again, this isn't really for anyone but me, so with the exception of the 3-4 people here who actually matter to me, i could give a shit what others think.
And yes, there's gonna be more coming in time, so keep the -2redpencil sharp.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:11:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
_________
What on earth isn't self-indulgent in some form, Bubba?
You continue to breathe the air that allows you to live, don't you?
You're going to die your own death and live your own life, aren't you?
I think in the manner in which you're criticising Filthy is equivalent to scolding her for living her own life. The manner in which she's criticising Jay is more along the lines of: we just don't want to hear about how his life is unfolding or how he's living his. Completely different interpretations of "self-indulgent".
Although annoying, this is pretty much the standard for the majority of this site anyways.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry Caul, I forgot to tell you that Harvey the Rabbit is a swell ol' pal of mine, along with the Caterbury Ghost and Slimer.
Fucking twat.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2006-10-23 00:01:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:04:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm leaving this place. You people are severely fucked up.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 23:23:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
what friends?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:58:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I may want to point you abck to my previous, Ax.
Where I pointed out that a new 9competent) shrink has changed my diagnosis.
I'm not bipolar. ( I almost want to say anymore, but that's not possible)
I have anger/anxiety/acceptance issues that in my long dull life have never been dealt with.
Every general problem leads to something specific, and lying is from my issues with acceptance. I guess that I feel that if I make myself more interesting than I really am, people will "like me better" or something.
Yes, I know it's bullshit.
Yes, it's getting worked out.
But ya know what? even on a small scale, I'm now making a strong effort to point out what lies I've made, and give you (as in everyone) the truth.
A long journey blah blah single step.
Basically, I have to start somewhere, and this is as good a place as any. I'm not worried about actually losing friends by coming clean here, it's the real folks in my life I'm worried about.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:41:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Almost a pathological liar?
This post is a self-indulgent masturbatory epic of rationalizing and making excuses for your disgusting lying, your dehumanizing practice of inventing stories about your sex life, career, and intelligence to cover up for your insecurity.
Before a prisoner is found innocent by insanity, they ask if he had the "mental capacity to appreciate the consequences of his actions."
You're bipolar, that's your excuse, but can you appreciate the consequences?
Submitted by august_sobriquet (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:23:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my dad is not a worldly man, but a couple of things i learned from him that are valuable and always help me through are these...
Don't fucking lie.
it doesn't matter how hard it is to say the truth, the lie will always be worse in the end.
Nobody is better than you.
we are all just sacks of flesh and bones motoring around doing different things until we run out of energy and die.
they sound pretty unspectacular, but I think they are essential things to understand and accept.
good luck with turning over your new leaf.
I would say quit making excuses for yourself and think before you talk, or type, but that might be rude.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:17:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:08:02 (#)
Ranking: -2
its called a "therapist" or a "friend" to vent.
do you have either?
----
Someone hasn't read the last post yet...
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:08:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
its called a "therapist" or a "friend" to vent.
do you have either?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-22 22:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm leaving this place. You people are severely fucked up.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:58:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd put money on this being another one of jay's enlightening "experiments" that conclusively proves something that everyone else already knew.
--------------------------------------
Nope.
I'm just gonna be me from now on.
And whoever down there said it is a it right.
Here, I can have a voice, for good or bad, ridiculed or not, and I plan on using it.
And Filthy, before ya go too far, kiddo, remember this.
I actually like you hubby more than you, because he at least shows SOME intelligence that wasn't gained by gargling little swimmers.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:50:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:28:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:22:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
____________________
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
Maybe you should reassess your motivation and stop being rude to real people.
:-/
===
Maybe you should suck my metaphorical cock.
I'd put money on this being another one of jay's enlightening "experiments" that conclusively proves something that everyone else already knew.
+++++++++++
Maybe you should kiss my literal ass. You should save your money to keep your hubby from the clutches of the Establishment. They know about him you see, and, although you are simply a
third-rate cum hanger, it would be wise to put a damper on yer pie hole.
:-/
===
Third rate cum hanger? I'll start considering your advice when you start practicing what you preach, bubba.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:45:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Masochist.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:28:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:22:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
____________________
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
Maybe you should reassess your motivation and stop being rude to real people.
:-/
===
Maybe you should suck my metaphorical cock.
I'd put money on this being another one of jay's enlightening "experiments" that conclusively proves something that everyone else already knew.
+++++++++++
Maybe you should kiss my literal ass. You should save your money to keep your hubby from the clutches of the Establishment. They know about him you see, and, although you are simply a
third-rate cum hanger, it would be wise to put a damper on yer pie hole.
:-/
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:26:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Get ready for some pictures of me to smoke you, zoolander. We're about to have a model off.
===
bring it!
*makes self vomit*
=======
WOOOO
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:06:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
you're the type of dude that's always two days late for the party, but dude, to be two years too late for your own party here is fucking ridiculous. unbelievable, even.
i know why you continue to come here jay. in your world we're the only people that allow you a voice, and god knows how you wanna be heard. do you realize that these lies haven't aided your plight to seem less dull and pathetic? your admission somehow makes you come across as even more of a cock.
===
DOUBLE SNAP!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
____________________
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
Maybe you should reassess your motivation and stop being rude to real people.
:-/
===
OH SNAP!
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:22:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
____________________
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
Maybe you should reassess your motivation and stop being rude to real people.
:-/
===
Maybe you should suck my metaphorical cock.
I'd put money on this being another one of jay's enlightening "experiments" that conclusively proves something that everyone else already knew.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:16:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have had no girlfriends.
or boyfriends.
Submitted by djhurricane (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:16:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you're going to use shlongy's nose in your pictures at least give him credit. It's what he craves.
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2006-10-22 21:06:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you're the type of dude that's always two days late for the party, but dude, to be two years too late for your own party here is fucking ridiculous. unbelievable, even.
i know why you continue to come here jay. in your world we're the only people that allow you a voice, and god knows how you wanna be heard. do you realize that these lies haven't aided your plight to seem less dull and pathetic? your admission somehow makes you come across as even more of a cock.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:59:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*sigh*
nevermind Caul.
Sky is blue, dude.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually I'll pretty much fuck anything that has an ass in the ass. So I guess that includes you too, Shlongster.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:52:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It would HAVE to be the ass because...would you want to look at that face or taste her breath?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:48:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Of course, I'd also fuck Filthy Assistant in the ass pretty hard too.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:46:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
____________________
And traveling several thousand miles to hang with a weirdo is not self-indulgent?
Maybe you should reassess your motivation and stop being rude to real people.
:-/
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:45:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I wish I was gay.
I'd fuck Caulain in the ass so hard my dick would snap off.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:42:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:15:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
I care what people think, dipshit.
===
so does everybody. what does that excuse?
that's my point.
CRÈVES!
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You WISH you had a nose like that, to make up for your teensy-weensy fat encased little prick.
Submitted by 8track (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:39:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Damn it you suck.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Get ready for some pictures of me to smoke you, zoolander. We're about to have a model off.
===
bring it!
-------------
Fellas, you just made a lecherous old lady very happy.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:31:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're still lying. You've had sex ZERO times in the last two years.
And the rest of your lies? We already knew you were lying about pretty much everything you write so there's really no point in "coming clean".
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:28:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul.
====
There's no soul in this post, just self-indulgence.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:15:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:48 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:57:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
You really REALLY need to make it known that you're better than others, don't you, Caul? """
no fuckface, i just hate this sad fucking excuse "I care about people!" everybody cares about people, idiot. you sound like tigerlilly when she says she's too nice when she acts like when an emtionial wreck.
this doesn't make you any less worthless.
-------
Wow.
YOU read that WAY wrong if that's what you got from it.
I care what people think, dipshit.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jay, old Colorado compadre, Uber is NOT the place to bare your soul. People here will ream your ass from the cover of anonymity, and will be harsh when doing so. Let's just pretend this was all shennanigans....
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:06:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Get ready for some pictures of me to smoke you, zoolander. We're about to have a model off.
===
bring it!
*makes self vomit*
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:57:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
You really REALLY need to make it known that you're better than others, don't you, Caul? """
no fuckface, i just hate this sad fucking excuse "I care about people!" everybody cares about people, idiot. you sound like tigerlilly when she says she's too nice when she acts like when an emtionial wreck.
this doesn't make you any less worthless.
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:05:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You are such an asshole, Caul. Get ready for some pictures of me to smoke you, zoolander. We're about to have a model off.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:04:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
:-)
Thanks, KK. The Risperdol DID suck ass...
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-10-22 20:03:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Jay, I'm on enough medication to kill a small pony, as I've said multiple times before on here.
One of the side effects of being on heavy anti-psychotics is a much decreased libido. Often, I'm intellectually aware of beauty and sexuality, but I find myself unable to care. The last time I had sex (in March) I found myself thinking, "Meh." In the last 5 months, I've had seven different women stay the night with me, but nothing overtly explicit has happened. Some of that is obviously due to the women, but mostly it was me.
Currently I'm in this complex relationship with one of my best friends. She's beautiful, brilliant and I'm in constant awe of her. We make out when we're bored and she's stayed the night multiple times. There's a part of me that feels the overwhelming need to get her naked, then there's the majority of me that's half asleep.
The point of all this??? - I dunno...
Buck up, lil' Champ!!!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:57:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:50:26 (#)
Ranking: -2
But also someone who actually cares about people, even if it's a little too much at times,"""
that's what EVERY desperate person say.
"i'm an obese retard which steals valuable oxygen and space, but hey, i care about people...love me?"
fuck you! people like you only suck energy out of others because you'd rather think you're nice than face the fact that you're a worthless piece of shit.
you're past the point of no return, dude. i can provide the gun if you want.
------------------
You really REALLY need to make it known that you're better than others, don't you, Caul?
That's sad itself, in it's own little way.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:54:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:50:26 (#)
Ranking: -2
But also someone who actually cares about people, even if it's a little too much at times,"""
that's what EVERY desperate person say.
"i'm an obese retard which steals valuable oxygen and space, but hey, i care about people...love me?"
fuck you! people like you only suck energy out of others because you'd rather think you're nice than face the fact that you're a worthless piece of shit.
you're past the point of no return, dude. i can provide the gun if you want.
________________
They allow you to have a gun in Canada, even though you're a fa....
Far out!! I'm movin'.....
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:53:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I guess I have to +2 the honesty, but jesus. Self delusion makes me sad.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:53:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, just thought of another one.
And funny enough, it's about gambing.
I've dabbled for years, but never serious. A couple bets a week on football, about half the NCAA tourney games every year, and the occasional NBA game.
I am posting the picks this year for the side job, that's not a lie.
But I could also just be e-mailing them in. I'm posting them because I want to see for myself how I can do, and how I can get better at it. And the only way to get better is to be criticized. I knew Shlongy would rip the shitty picks, but I didn't think Nitty would. So I'm using what they both say, (even though it's not much) and working on it.
I'm actually happier with my picks the last few weeks, because I was picking with more info and less gut instinct, even though my gut picks tend to be right more often than not. (Not a ton, but enough) I just have to work on when to trust my gut, and when to trust info.
This week is a good case. I trusted info on Indy winning and New England winning. I also trusted info and had the Jags and the Chargers and the Eagles lose.
On the flip side, I followed my gut on GB and Atlanta and the Jets winning and was right, and on Seattle but I was wrong.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:50:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
But also someone who actually cares about people, even if it's a little too much at times,"""
that's what EVERY desperate person say.
"i'm an obese retard which steals valuable oxygen and space, but hey, i care about people...love me?"
fuck you! people like you only suck energy out of others because you'd rather think you're nice than face the fact that you're a worthless piece of shit.
you're past the point of no return, dude. i can provide the gun if you want.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Again, I kinda guessed. you have camwhored you know. 4 times is more than I'd have thought.
Submitted by Serious_Melvin (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:49:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:44:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:32:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
whatever, i'm actually a 40 year old man.
_____________________
I, on the other hand, am actually a 16 year-old girl with DD cup hooters and
a tight ass and a yearning for fat dudes.
:-D
--
what the hell man ,and so on and so forth
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:45:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't like you, Jay Pig.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:44:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:32:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
whatever, i'm actually a 40 year old man.
_____________________
I, on the other hand, am actually a 16 year-old girl with DD cup hooters and
a tight ass and a yearning for fat dudes.
:-D
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:43:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, all he knows about Uber is that it's a posting board, and we've had a brief conversation about WHY I stick around (arguing=communication and attention). In a way, I'm almost as bad as OathMeal. The difference is, I don't try to make people like or hate me, I try to make them notice me.
But no, we don't talk about the site itself.
--
As for this post?
Nope. It's all me. I'm just tired of lying all the time about everything, and I've decided to set some things straight so that that people can like or hate me for who I really am.
An overweight, overworked, apprehensive man with few goals in life who can't kick himself in the ass hard enough to get out of the rut he's been running in for the last 5 years.
But also someone who actually cares about people, even if it's a little too much at times, and who's bright but not intelligent.
Oh, there's another lie I tell a lot. I say I scored a 32 on my ACT's and a 1350 on my SAT's.
Those were my prep-test score corrilations. I never took the tests outright.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:37:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LIE: Just about everything I've ever said here about relationships.
TRUTH: In the almost 2 years I'e been posting here, I've had 2 girlfriends. One was for a few months, one was for about 6. Honest truth, and go ahead and cringe ahead of time, I've only had sex 4 times in the past two years.
--
You went out with a girl for 6 months and only slept with her 4 times??
What the fuck were you thinking?
A relationship for a fat guy is like Autumn for squirrels, you need to spend as much time as possible collecting those beautiful nuts of coital goodness in preperation for the cold abstinate months to follow.
DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING?
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:37:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh gee. I never thought anyone could lie on an internet website.
Gosh. I feel so violated.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:35:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i bet this whole apology for your lies is part of your therapy.
i bet you talk about ubersite with your therapist.
kill yourself!
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:32:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
whatever, i'm actually a 40 year old man.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:30:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-08-29 21:58:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Lesse... Last time... Sex with woman...
Hmm.
That would be Saturday night, thankya so much.
Before that?
Oh MAN... Gotta be... Shit... The Saturday before that?
MAN was it a long time ago.
Jeezus, I can't... I can't even remember anything about her, I mean, it was 3 and 10 DAYS ago...
HOly shit, I'm a PRIEST.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-10-22 19:30:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
+2 for your honesty
-2 for being honest