Uber VS. Uber - A Response to JohnnyX (620 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.95 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ih8u2man (View user info) at 2006-10-25 12:04:50 EDT
Original post... http://www.ubersite.com/m/94799
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-24 14:16:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Do these with Uberusers instead.
Good day everybody. In response to a comment JohnnyX was kind enough to place on a post of mine the other day I put a little do dad together here.
I ask you UBER's....who would win in a fight? Below are my picks. I am curious about yours....who would win in a no holds bar fight and more importantly why?
Ladies and germs....here are your choices.......
MickGinny VS. Fat Tony
MickGinny would take him in 3 rounds, tire him out and knock his ass to the ground.
Matt Maiorano VS. Sideburns
Maiorano looks a little off in the head, probably be a lot of kicking in the fight, but Sideburns would put up a good fight.
Rad 101 VS. Apollo 88
Heavy weight fight. I bet this would be a tie for awhile knowing Rad has recently got into shape, but my money's on the sun god.
ETS VS. Caulaincourt
As a Canadian I would want Cal to win. But ETS has plenty of pent up anger. Political anger outweighs sexual frustration and thus my bet would be ETS.
Cystmaster VS. Cystmaster
This guy is fucked. I respect that. Cystmaster would beat himself as he does regularly I am sure. And then shit and masturbate at the same time. While peeing on babies.
Kaos King VS. Method
Kaos King looks like one bad motherfucker. Method is a big guy too but Kaos would fuck him up.
TigerLilly VS. Forensic Girl
I like them both. I can only guess here, but TigerLilly seems like she could throw a punch.
Ghola VS. Jeannee
Not sure again, but Jeannee looks like she could pummel poor little Ghola.
Jgreening VS. Phuzzygish
Jgreening would drop kick this dude pretty hard. Lots of blood. And the smell of sweaty balls.
Shlongy VS. Skinny Kenny
C'mon people. This would be quick.
Thorpe VS. Wiggles
Go Thorpe.
Bart VS. Emu
Obvious to me.
Habeeb VS. iddqd
Iddqd is in drag. That is all.
Kracka VS. Badass Mofo
Last but far from least is this title fight. I go with Badass, but Kracka would be no pushover. Equal weight classes, but Badass is a harsh dude.
User Reviews
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-10-25 22:49:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-10-25 21:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would totally beat filename.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-10-25 20:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I might be able to whup a skinny, starving third-grader who has MS, MD, and is
blind...
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-25 19:59:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kaos rocks my socks
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-10-25 19:42:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:15:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Kaos smokes two packs of full flavored menthol cigarettes a day, I would ruin him
I only smoke one pack a day
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Yeah, but it doesn't take much effort to swing a baseball bat laced with razor wire at the back of your head while you're posing in front of the mirror again.
Let's be honest here - Method would use his nefarious evil schemes to lure unsuspecting Uberites into my torture chamber, where after I have enacted unspeakable violations upon them, we sell their remains for a small profit to The Cyst Master to masturbate into.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I could beat every Uber user's ass, but I'm too modest and easygoing to say it.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:29:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BUT WHOM WOULD CRUMPLE WHOM AND WHY?
Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2006-10-25 16:22:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice idea, poor execution.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 15:03:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think ETS could kill Caul before it even started.
Remember, he does like to threaten people with his long-range sniping skillz.
Oh, and I'm sure getting punched in the ovaries by a Masonic ring would double Caul over.
Don't forget the hunting knife, either. ETS would hold that up, and Frenchie would try to deep throat it like a pro.
Then again, I'm sure ETS would rather blow himself up than get fucked in the ass, so maybe Caul COULD win by just getting undressed and lubed up...
I'm going to bleach my mind, now...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:00:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
i have no sexual frustration. if anything i asked my gf to take breaks because my peener hurts a lot.
and i could kill that 135 pounds ETS faggot in a heartbeat.
--
Isn't ETS originally from Kentucky, or residing there now? Not only would Caul be cut down, but his remains would end up in a damn stew along with some squirrel heads.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-10-25 14:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i have no sexual frustration. if anything i asked my gf to take breaks because my peener hurts a lot.
and i could kill that 135 pounds ETS faggot in a heartbeat.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:17:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cystmaster VS. Cystmaster
This guy is fucked. I respect that. Cystmaster would beat himself as he does regularly I am sure. And then shit and masturbate at the same time. While peeing on babies.
---
Made the whole journey worth it.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:16:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Did someone say something?
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:03:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:59:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
Needs more Sphagnum whipping some moron's ass.
=====
The problem with this, Sfaggy, is that you couldn't beat your way through a cobweb.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:03:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:59:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
Needs more Sphagnum whipping some moron's ass.
Well, I think you MIGHT be able to whip Electro.
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2006-10-25 13:01:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
As long as we're being semi-serious, surely Caul would muder ETS? Yes, he's a flaming frenchcanadian cokeaddict fag, but he looked pretty pumped in the last few camwhores I saw (yeah, I jerked off to them too). Muscles =/= Good fighter, but they certainly help.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:59:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Needs more Sphagnum whipping some moron's ass.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:53:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I expected this to be 'meh,' but jesus, this killed me...
ETS VS. Caulaincourt
As a Canadian I would want Cal to win. But ETS has plenty of pent up anger. Political anger outweighs sexual frustration and thus my bet would be ETS.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:52:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:47:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
You forgot this one...
Captain Thorns vs. Orgasmatron:
Another close fight, but in the end Captain's loud guitars and mesmerizing o-face soundly defeat O-Man, who was too busy writing another poem about vaginal discharge.
---
I have not yet entered my Vaginal Discharge/Yeast Infection Phase yet.
Rest assured, everyone will know when I have.
I do believe I am moving out of my Vaginal Blood Period though.
Submitted by livEvil (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:47:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This seems like a very silly way to get hits/name drop. You can't possibly guess someone's ability to fight based on a picture and/or internet persona.
With that said, I would beat the living shit out of that emu.
He looks weak.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:47:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You forgot this one...
Captain Thorns vs. Orgasmatron:
Another close fight, but in the end Captain's loud guitars and mesmerizing o-face soundly defeat O-Man, who was too busy writing another poem about vaginal discharge.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can throw a punch, but would never hit forensic.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:36:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I am not in it.
and your picks are terrible...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:35:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
~OathMeal Approved~
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:29:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't DARE fight phuzzy.
Because every female here on Uber would fucking KILL me if I accidentally did anything to him...
CAn't discount the female Ubersexdrive, you know...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:20:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Shlongy vs. ANYBODY would be "quick".
Next time, match up Shlongy vs. TigerLilly, round 2.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:19:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me laugh.
MickGinny VS. Fat Tony
MickGinny would win by a heart attack.
Matt Maiorano VS. Sideburns
This would be a draw after they fall in love with each other and leave holding hands.
Rad 101 VS. Apollo 88
They would both spontaneously combust due to the alcohol in their bloodstreams.
ETS VS. Caulaincourt
Depends on how coked up Caul is.
Cystmaster VS. Cystmaster
Who cares?
Kaos King VS. Method
Kaos King wins outright, but method's alters swarm him and pick him to pieces.
TigerLilly VS. Forensic Girl
TigerLilly goes all Jose Canseco with the leg.
Ghola VS. Jeannee
Jeaneeee slays Gholaiath
Jgreening VS. Phuzzygish
Jgreening wins due to Phuzzygish forfeiting because he simply has better things to do.
Shlongy VS. Skinny Kenny
Shlongy gives him a sandwich to take a dive.
Thorpe VS. Wiggles
Who cares?
Bart VS. Emu
Emu wins. Bart bans him and takes away his ratings.
Habeeb VS. iddqd
iddqd loses and can't erase the yellow and red peener drawn on him
Kracka VS. Badass Mofo
They get bored and team up to pummel Oathmeal.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:18:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah, i don't smoke menthols
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:16:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it's still menthol *vomits*
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:15:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kaos smokes two packs of full flavored menthol cigarettes a day, I would ruin him
I only smoke one pack a day
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:13:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
*sung to the batman theme tune*
nanananananana
hit whore
*pow!*
hit whore
*sock!*
HIT WHORE
Still good though
Submitted by Cadrach (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:10:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
User Reviews
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No reviews
Submitted by UnderOathMeal (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:09:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
~OathMeal Approved Post~
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-10-25 12:09:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If this gets a lot of responses then I will do the winners and come down to the toughest Uber in a second round and final round.