Uber users at the Pearly Gates- Volume 3 (901 hits)
Category: GeneralLabels: pearly_gates
Rating: 1.71 on 47 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by awesomeface (View user info) at 2006-11-13 16:38:38 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94330 - Volume 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94473 - Volume 2
______________________________________________
The Cyst Master was waiting at the front of the line facing away from St. Peter. He was chatting away endlessly until Pete called his name.
"Cyst Master!" He shouted. Cyst turned around to face St. Pete. But we all know that when The Cyst Master turns around, so does his penis. St. Peter was violently sideswiped by The Cyst Masters junk and fell onto the floor. Cyst hadn't seen Pete fall onto the floor so he began to call his name.
"Hey Pete? Where the hell did you go?" The Cyst Master began to look in all directions except for down.
"Over here." St. Peter coughed. The Cyst Master once again turned knocking St. Peter back to the floor. Shortly after he did a full 360 degree turn knocking over the next 83 people in line with his penis. "This guy is too dangerous." St. Pete whispered to himself. "I can't let him enter heaven." Pete began to crawl to the red rope in order to pull it while the spinning pendulum of rape swung violently overhead. After a minute of ducking and dodging Pete was able to pull the rope down just enough to let the shaft to hell open. The Cyst Master disappeared in seconds but his penis took three minutes to fall in the hole.
NEXT
"Darko?" Pete announced.
"Yeah what?" He said slouching on over.
"Alright let's see your record here. Winner of D-Prime Madness, assortment of funny posts, nice camwhores, plays Chrono Cross and Guitar Hero. You know what? I really like you Darko."
"Yeah whatever." Darko mumbled. St. Pete looked up to see why Darko showed so much disinterest. As it turned out Darko wasn't paying attention at all to what Pete was saying. He held a wireless mouse and pointed it at St. Pete and repeatedly right clicked on him.
"Did you listen to a thing I said?"
"Nope...trying to read your filename." He said while continuing to click on the aggrivated saint.
"You dick! I don't have a filename." St. Pete tugged the red rope and Darko joined The Cyst Master.
NEXT
"AsshOly!"
"Why you gotta stress the O so much?" AsshOly responded.
"Cause it's written on the fucken paper you cheese dick."
"Aren't Saints not supposed to swear?"
"Only when nobody is writing shit down, we can't let that kind of stuff end up in holy scriptures. How do you think it would look if I said 'Is St. Pete gonna have to choke a bitch?' in the Bible?"
"It would score some points with the teenage crowd which you could probably use down at earth. Nobody really believes in this shit anymore."
"Is the presence of the Pearly Gates before you enough proof?"
"Yeah...I used to think heaven was like an internment camp or something."
"Uhhhh....nooooooooo...internment camp? No way in hell man. We're heaven, we are the good guys. Why don't you just come on in?" St. Pete pasted on a smile and tugged the golden rope. AsshOly walked on in and the last thing that could be heard as the doors closed was.
"Oh hey, greeters! Hey wait...why is there barbed wire and fences everywhere...and why are you guys dressed like Nazis?" A few muffled sounds were the last thing anybody ever heard from AsshOly.
NEXT
"Jack McCallum, come on down."
"You said that like I just won something on the price is right."
"Don't be a smartass Jack, you want in?"
"Yes sir."
"Ok then shut up. This piece of paper here tells me you are a brilliant writer who wasted all of his time away on a website full of fuck ups. What gives?"
"One must surround himself by idiots to look great. It has been done countless times throughout history. Genghis, Napoleon, Ghandi, Fonzi. They all surrounded themselves by idiots."
"Yeah you are right. Fonzi wasn't THAT cool, it's just Richie was a giant fucking tool."
"You see, I'm not even that good at writing. I only appear to be."
"Well we could certainly use more like you. Welcome aboard." Jack McCallum tiptoed into heaven.
NEXT
"Kaos-King." Kaos took a long drag on his cigarette and peered down to a nervous St. Pete. Kaos decided he would use the approach Foolproof used earlier. He stared deep into Pete's eyes and mumbled.
"Let me in."
"Uhhh...yeah sure...come on in." St. Pete tugged the golden rope.
"No not there...there." Kaos pointed his head to the red rope. An evil glare erupted from Kaos and Pete happily sent him down to hell.
"Guy scares the shit outta me."
NEXT
"Bad Ass Julie." Julie stepped forward.
"So boss...is it looking good for me?" She asked anxiously. Pete said nothing and just stared at her nose. "You ok Pete?" His eyes could not leave her nostrils. "Pete...you're creeping me out." Still on the nose. "Pete!" She snapped. Pete took his eyes off her nose for a second.
"Oh yeah...sure come on in. Heaven is a sausage fest anyway. We could use some stinky pinky upstairs." Pete tugged on the golden rope and Julie was immediatly seized by several lonely individuals upon entering heaven.
NEXT
"Ghola?" St. Pete shouted but to no response. He looked up and down the line for her but she was nowhere to be found. "Wonder where she could be?" St. Pete said while checking behind him. As soon as his head turned a blade rested on his throat. Ghola stood before him in full ninja garb.
"Where is Kaos?" She snapped.
"What?"
"Where is he?" She demanded.
"Ahhh..uhhh...hell...he wanted to go to hell so I let him go. If you want to follow him I will let you go just please don't hurt me. For the love of God!"
"HEY WATCH IT FUCK STICK!" A voice boomed from above.
"Oh...sorry god.." He turned his attention back to Ghola. Just please don't hurt me I will let you follow him."
"Follow him? Ha, fuck no. That guy is creepy. I'm trying to get away from him."
"And there I thought you were a loving and faithful friend."
"You've got alot to learn about women St. Pete. None of us are loving and faithful. Now open the gates." St. Pete tugged the golden rope and Ghola back flipped into heaven.
NEXT
"Sacrilicious." Pete said still startled by his near death encounter.
"What can I do you for Petey?"
"Well...let's see here. Well Sacrilicious...there is no record here for you. It is just blank."
"That's cause I know who to pay and who to sleep with."
"You know there is something about women like you. You are not whores but you have a class act about you. Even if it requires you being a whore. Since you went through all the trouble and slept with a string of people to get this erased...probably me. I will let you on through. Welcome to heaven. Plus we still could use some more pussy in there." Pete tugged the gold rope and Sacrilicious whored happily ever after.
NEXT
"Coley...oh...Nicole...Coley...I get it now."
"Get what?" Coley asked.
"Your username...Coley...Nicole...your real name."
"Figure that one all by yourself smart one?"
"Yeah I know, this interviewing process has really been stimulating my brain all these years. I don't even know how smart I really am."
"Yeah whatever. So who do I gotta bang to get into heaven?"
"That would be me. St. Pete took of his robe and waited for Coley to get working."
"You know I never figured out why inion_de_trua didn't try this." She said walking towards Pete.
"Try what?"
"Getting close enough to you to do this."
"Wait do what?" Coley looked as if she was about to go down on St. Pete but tugged the golden rope instead.
No that was not sexual either. She literally pulled the golden rope. I can't think of any sexual innuendo regarding golden rope but I am sure one of you can.
The gate flung open and Coley escaped with her dignity.
NEXT
"Sphagnum. The meanest sun of a bitch on this side of the block."
"Oh how are you doing St. Pete." Sphagnum said holding a tray of cookies with a pink apron draped with flowers.
"What the fuck? Why aren't you being a dick?"
"Oh you see, i'm nice now http://www.ubersite.com/m/95607 ."
"Well fuck...I liked the mean Sphagnum. If I want the old Sphagnum back I guess I have to send him back to the fiery pits of hell."
"Mother fucker!" He yelled dropping his cookies and ripping his apron off. "The hells a nigga gotta do to get in heaven?"
"Not cross dress. Buh bye!" Pete tugged the red rope and Sphagnum fell into hell.
NEXT
______________________________
THE SCORE BOARD
HELL:
Axolotl
Jeanneee
UnderOathMeal
Kaelic
ETS
Paint it Black
Average Dan
inion_de_trua
forthewin
Bart
The Cyst Master
Darko
Kaos-King
Sphagnum
HEAVEN:
Method
Foolproof
JonnyX
LSD
AwesomeFace
Sicosemen
Electro
Ilikesteak
Orgasmatron
The Bosh Man
Earl Scruggs
AsshOly
Jack McCallum
Bad Ass Julie
Ghola
Sacrilicious
Coley
_______________________________
Sphagnum fell onto the floor of hell and was surrounded by fire, brimstone and whores. Hell seemed pretty promising. All until a shadow came up from behind him. He tried to move but found that he was suddenly tied down on all fours naked.
He could have swore the shadow looked something like...
User Reviews
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-11-18 06:43:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
holy fuck, i remember asking to get killed for this series but i never read this post.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-11-17 08:55:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 Sphagnum going to hell.
He probably deserves it.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2006-11-15 15:33:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As long as my name is mentioned in a post in any way, I'll +2 it.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-14 16:10:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Of Course...
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-11-14 11:15:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My mom was sooooooo right. I am going to hell.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-14 08:26:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:59:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-11-13 20:50:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:33:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
(Ahem)...
Submitted by Joe_all_night_long (user info) at 2006-11-14 05:06:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Loved it. But when you say 'Heaven' you mean the gay club in London, right?
Right?
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:59:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-11-13 20:50:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:33:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
(Ahem)...
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:43:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FunnyAsCancer wants to die!
Think of all the good material you could get from that! Cancer! It's hysterical!
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:38:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It's funny, but I can't + 2 something that so clearly tries to suck so much cock at once.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-13 22:45:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by I_love_Kracka (user info) at 2006-11-13 22:10:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-11-13 21:14:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-10-17 00:20:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
There better be a follow up, and I better be in it.
Or else IMA KEEL U DED!
==========
U KEEL DED!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-13 21:07:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh-heh-heh... let the corruption of the innocents begin.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-11-13 20:50:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:33:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
(Ahem)...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:33:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
(Ahem)...
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:20:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:49:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:49:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
so far both places are full of C - listers.
someone wake me up when he gets to me.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You mean the D-list?
Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:19:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
gorgonaozla
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:16:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:49:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:49:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
so far both places are full of C - listers.
someone wake me up when he gets to me.
----
excuse me, bitches?
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:13:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank god I've maintained my dignity through this all.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:08:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:30:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
Forgot to rate.
-
because of that
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:04:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Please kill me. I could use the sleep.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:30:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
Forgot to rate.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:29:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
SHIT!!! WHY AM I NOT IN HERE? THIS IS THE THIRD FUCKING TIME I'VE ASKED YOU!!! PUT ME IN THE NEXT ONE!!!
Really.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:10:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:25:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
pssst.... scourge. Try googling "schmuck" instead of "smuck"
===
I know, I was picking on him. God knows I NEVER make any spelling errors. Beneath me...
Anyway, send me wherever the hottest chicks are.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:57:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet, you killed me off and I got into heaven.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:49:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:49:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
so far both places are full of C - listers.
someone wake me up when he gets to me.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:38:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:33:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:32:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
Try doing an image search for "prolapse."
-
mmmmm tasty
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:32:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Try doing an image search for "prolapse."
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:25:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pssst.... scourge. Try googling "schmuck" instead of "smuck"
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:10:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:08:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
YOu know, that alter is starting to get slightly annoying...
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V
___
I figured it was an alter, been camping me lately.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:08:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YOu know, that alter is starting to get slightly annoying...
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V
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:01:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:57:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:56:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
what is a smuck?
i googled it and found nothing....
_
South Park episode with the hybrid cars.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:57:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hell yea I'm still in heaven, even after I grabbed Julie, or all those things I did to those nuns. Really, I'm suprised, either god hasn't found my kidnapped angel harem, or he really enjoys a show.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:56:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what is a smuck?
i googled it and found nothing....
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:56:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:46:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-02-02 13:52:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-02 13:49:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're saying you don't want to be a whore for me on Tuesdays???
--------------------------------------------------------------------
'Whore' is not nearly a dirty enough term for what I want to be for you.
Appropriately whorish entry into heaven.
===
Agreed.
You really "get" me.
I laughed out loud a few times here..this is really good, AF.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:52:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
But I'm still waiting for a hell of unopenable jam jars.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:50:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:49:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
so far both places are full of C - listers.
someone wake me up when he gets to me.
_
*cough SMUCK!!!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:49:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
so far both places are full of C - listers.
someone wake me up when he gets to me.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:46:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Another good installment.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:46:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-02-02 13:52:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-02-02 13:49:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
You're saying you don't want to be a whore for me on Tuesdays???
--------------------------------------------------------------------
'Whore' is not nearly a dirty enough term for what I want to be for you.
Appropriately whorish entry into heaven.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:46:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha..
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:44:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:42:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahaah
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-11-13 16:40:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*emo tears*