UberMadness IV - Round Four Analysis - REVISED (3211 hits)
Category: UberMadness!Rating: 1.15 on 263 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Snark << snarkk.at.gmail.com (View user info) at 2006-11-14 00:27:19 EST
First Off,
I want to say a heart felt thanks to those of you who are involved in the tournament this year and who have been more than patient with the technical glitches. The format this year is brand new and as such glitches are being ironed out as we go.
Secondly,
My apologies for the last minute changes that have haunted the last few rounds. I could make all sorts of excuses regarding time frames, rule complications etc but I won't. Any gripes people might have with the way things have been going can fall squarely on my shoulders. I take them gladly as long as this thing keeps going. There have been some great stories and I'm really looking forward to seeing how things pan out in the end.
Will Jack regain his crown? Will a dark horse rise to take it? Will JMG reveal his love for all things puce?
Only time will tell.
Here's the next round...
Kaos and Coleslaw will rematch. The decision for doing so was based on this:
"However, for the record, allowing Kaos back in and giving out no byes is an equally acceptable alternative solution. The important thing is to have the 4-0 people in one bracket, and to have the right number of survivors going into the next round."
Consider it a rematch. Also, if someone runs into Kaos... let him know what's up.
Also, I have had to make one adjustment to avoid a matchup between two people who have already faced off.
Good Luck to all in round 5.
Here is the graphic:
User Reviews
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-16 02:23:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-11-27 03:30:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I lost. Not surprising really, I was god smacked that I actually made it this far.
Well done to Parlor Trick and I wish you well in the rest of the competition.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-11-26 20:50:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I had the worst week evar, resulting in my five minute poem (entry two of Twilight Lost). It was that or a forfeit.
Congrats JMG :)
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-26 20:49:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks Bubba!
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-26 20:04:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fairly certain this is correct...
Almost Full
Entry 1: 5 (6) ColeslawMurphy
Entry 2: 24 (24) Kaos
Deep Forest
Entry 1: 27 (28) FunnyAsCancer
Entry 2: 15 (16) Nerfherder
Over the Falls
Entry 1: 13 (13) DragoRoch
Entry 2: 23 (23) ParlorTrick
Twilight Lost
Entry 1: 35 (37) JMG114
Entry 2: 8 (8) Coley
High Stakes
Entry 1: 21 (21) Pentameter
Entry 2: 16 (17) Ghola
Victim of Progress
Entry 1: 20 (21) Domenad
Entry 2: 20 (21) Hilinara (won per Uberlord)
Plan of Action
Entry 1: 30 (31) Stagger_Lee
Entry 2: 12 (13) ShaunRocks
Titan
Entry 1: 26 (27) Jack McCallum
Entry 2: 16 (17) Stevie_Says
Hardcore
Entry 1: 39 (48) JoeyG
Entry 2: 14 (14) Crystle
Never Again
Entry 1: 16 (18) Coyote
Entry 2: 37 (43) CharminglyBeef
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-26 19:52:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://howtoprankatelemarketer.ytmnd.com/
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-26 13:33:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jack, what happens when the bloodlines intermingle?
ETS&Filthy's kids - who's "win" would that be?
And if there are any more 'Cons there are bound to be other "uber-babies"
it could complicate things infinitely.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-25 05:16:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
Let's start the whole thing over again. We can invite every uberuser and have 4,444 rounds. We can teach our children to carry on this generational contest and hope there is an afterlife so we can see which bloodline wins.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-26 03:31:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I DISAGREE FULLY http://www.ubersite.com/m/96173
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-26 03:03:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I listened to the worlds dumbest drug dealers outside my window one early morning.
It was rather funny looking back on it.
In fact, it was funny at the time as well.
Where's my hat?
I'm going to bed.
Break the med.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-25 19:34:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Get the fuck out of here you fucking bitch. You fucking bitch. This is my-- you fucking bitch, this is my house. Get the fuck out of here. You fucking bitch. What the fuck are you doing in my house you fucking bitch. Get the fuck out. Get the fuck out of my house you fucking bitch."
Multiply X 10 and turn up the volume and you have my drunken neighbor's rant from last night, at roughly 2:30am.
I shall have to purchase a firearm and put it to use.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-25 16:22:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to put chocolate syrup on my tater tots.
Jesus Christ does that sound good.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 05:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
thank god for the swiss, if not for the chocolate and cheese and clocks and skiing, the double elimination.
Jack, thats a brilliant idea.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-25 05:16:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 03:50:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
if you dont get a do over this competition is a pice of crap.
--
Let's start the whole thing over again. We can invite every uberuser and have 4,444 rounds. We can teach our children to carry on this generational contest and hope there is an afterlife so we can see which bloodline wins.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-25 04:06:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
He does get a do-over.
That's why it's Swiss-style double-elimination.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 03:50:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
UM has officially jumped the shark.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 03:50:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
if you dont get a do over this competition is a pice of crap.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-25 03:50:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Who wrought what?
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-25 03:25:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Can I get a do-over too?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-24 21:28:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-24 20:21:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, so 8 more people are out.
Next round, there are 12 people left, 2 undefeated, 10 with 1 loss.
After that round there will be 7 people left, 1 undefeated, 6 with 1 loss.
So um...with 7 people left, how's that gonna work out? Please don't tell me you're going to give the undefeated person a bye.
You got a month, hope it's a good answer.
********
I've been involved in blind-draw dart tournaments for years using the double-elimination method.
This is a travesty of that system. In darts, the names are pulled out of a hat and listed in the order they are drawn. If things start with a weird number of entrants, the byes are listed halfway through the chart in advance. Tournaments work best when the number of participants turns out to be 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, etc.
You really needed to know this bullshit, huh?
:)
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-24 20:25:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Easy. The remaining 6 team up and write a collborative story to go against the remaining undefeated player.
The single player has 6 hours to post, and that story will be held back.
The collaborators have 6 weeks.
This should all be over by April of '07.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-24 20:21:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, so 8 more people are out.
Next round, there are 12 people left, 2 undefeated, 10 with 1 loss.
After that round there will be 7 people left, 1 undefeated, 6 with 1 loss.
So um...with 7 people left, how's that gonna work out? Please don't tell me you're going to give the undefeated person a bye.
You got a month, hope it's a good answer.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 16:57:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think this is the 4th tie...
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 16:02:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No shit Jack this really sucks.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-24 15:41:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh Snark you artsy-fartsy bastard.
I had to break a tie just once, and HATED it. This is how many for you?
Jesus.
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-24 15:40:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stagger was entry 1 in Plan of Action, he wrote a cool story with a flop ending. No, I;m just kidding, it was good stuff. Congrats on beating me Stagger, goodluck on the rest of the tourny.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:43:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What a shitty decision to have to make. Who the hell wants to knock out a good writer?
Not me.
This job sucks sometimes.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:11:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Another tie... goddamn.
What a tourney this is turning out to be. I wish I was in this.
Tie breaking sucks... Time to go make a decision.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:08:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Cancer's "Deep Forest" FTW.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:00:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No, you're right -- that was definitely a McCallum tale.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 13:43:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This round, my dark horse went up against my fav to win. Either way, I feel like I won and lost.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-24 13:27:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:17:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
Because you touch yourself at night.
I was number two in 'Never Again'.
I'm betting Stagger_Lee wrote number one in Titan. Don't ask me why.
===
At night..yes..only at night..
I was a little put off about it because I still had one more matchup which I ended up missing a vote on because I thought the pair was closer than it was.
Interesting call you make. Stag's stories tend to jump out to me as his sometimes; that particular one didn't strike me as his style. I enjoyed/voted for it though- I'm interested to see if you're correct.
Enjoyed yours very much, CB. I think I've voted you every round so far.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:58:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:47:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
This round hurt.
So many good writers getting knocked out, yet so many cool stories to read.
**********
My heartfelt condolences go out to the losers of each round, but I am creaming my shorts just reading the entries. This is some good shit, folks....
No matter who wins or loses, I love all of this shit. Thank you all.....
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:47:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This round hurt.
So many good writers getting knocked out, yet so many cool stories to read.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:36:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:17:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
Because you touch yourself at night.
I was number two in 'Never Again'.
I'm betting Stagger_Lee wrote number one in Titan. Don't ask me why.
)))))))
BeefBoy, yer wrong about Titan. I really think that was Jac Mac....
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:29:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Or maybe that was McCallum.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:17:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Because you touch yourself at night.
I was number two in 'Never Again'.
I'm betting Stagger_Lee wrote number one in Titan. Don't ask me why.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:10:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Why would a matchup be marked as "too close to call" with 10 minutes to vote and a difference of 10 votes?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-23 20:44:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-23 20:17:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
sick and tired of this UM
--
Thanks for the input. If we need more of your opinions concerning Uber we'll be sure and give you a call. Have a nice day.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-23 20:17:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
sick and tired of this UM
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-23 12:06:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sent another email to Bart...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-23 08:59:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
http://www.bubbashouse.net/TGP/index.html
V
V
V
V
V
V
V
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-22 20:01:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-22 04:17:21 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-22 03:52:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
so,um... my story still isn't up yet.
==============
I sent an email to Bart earlier today.
__________
Bart who?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-22 04:17:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-22 03:52:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
so,um... my story still isn't up yet.
==============
I sent an email to Bart earlier today.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-11-22 04:02:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:55:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
Take_A_Drag _On _The _Roach had better not forfeit this round. He beat me because Snark hates me and wants to see my Grandchildren die in a nuclear war, but that is no excuse. Post it, DragDude, or I will find you and shove you and Snark up each other's asses....
:-D
--
I didn't fofeit chap. I gave it a go and will breathe a sigh of relief when I get knocked out this round as any creative juice I may have mistakenly believed I had is definately gone.
And Snark doesn't like me either because he gave me an evil title, so Snark the offer of my Anal Virginity is definately off now. (Any other takers?)
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-22 03:52:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
so,um... my story still isn't up yet.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 21:29:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 19:35:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm bored. soooo bored.
<mumbles something awekward about blow-drying>
sigh - my brain is dead for the day- my self-entertainer is broken! I need to be entertained.
--
*resists urge to make snide comment regarding battery-operated device*
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-11-21 19:50:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:14:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy fuck, Coley is still in this?
=======
WTF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN, DARKO
brain-raper!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 19:35:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm bored. soooo bored.
<mumbles something awekward about blow-drying>
sigh - my brain is dead for the day- my self-entertainer is broken! I need to be entertained.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 18:42:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Crystle, that's why I never 'do' lunch or go out with the crowd at work. I end up wearing whatever the hell I'm eating.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 18:37:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shit, I just found out I get out of work at noon tomorrow. Cool.
Maybe I'll head over to the dark calm of John's Grill and have a drink or two at the bar.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 18:37:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hahahahahaha
Oh man.
I'm sorry, really I am...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 18:26:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The crotch of my trousers is wet.
I'm not sure if I spilled some water while sipping from my bottle of Crystal Geyser a moment ago or if I just pissed in my pants.
The fact that I can't remember EITHER way is disturbing.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 18:16:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:26:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
jag är ledsen.
jag ska gråter nu.
jag är död.
slut.
--
What in the folded, spindled and mutilated fuck is that?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:27:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:21:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just done. The only time I face a real challenge, I throw up all over myself and collapse and die on the bench before I get a single shift.
--
Would it help if I said the following in a gravelly voice?
"Change your jersey, wipe your face, and get back on that field kid!"
Would it help if I provided old-fashioned sports movie music?
dah-dah-DAH-DAH, dahdahdah dahdah, dahdahDAAAHHDAAAAHHH, dahdahdah dahdah...
Would it help if I slapped you on the butt in a manly motivational fashion with no finger-linger or anything like that?
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:26:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
jag är ledsen.
jag ska gråter nu.
jag är död.
slut.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:23:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't you wish Bart left that Author #1 / Author #2 option in play so you could respond anonymously in your UM posts? Damn, man.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:21:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just done. The only time I face a real challenge, I throw up all over myself and collapse and die on the bench before I get a single shift.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:19:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:16:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just going to forfeit next time. I'm sick of this shit.
--
Whoa! What's goin on, stevie?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:18:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:37:16 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94829#2197154
hmmmm???
I should never have camwhored.
--
Have you SEEN how many times I said that and was wrong? One lucky guess.
And you look cute in that camwhore.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:16:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm just going to forfeit next time. I'm sick of this shit.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-21 17:04:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good Lord. Not again.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-11-21 16:14:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:06:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
The way things are looking, I'm going to lose simply because my story is longer.
--
Still much too early for that sort of thing. The post has been up for a few hours and already you're hopeless?
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:37:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94829#2197154
hmmmm???
I should never have camwhored.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:10:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:00:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
although.. it seems that it's pretty darn easy to pick which writing is mine.
--
Are you kidding? I can never tell.
If I could tell, I would have voted for you.
Cause you're a girl. And you have boobies and stuff.
Hey, this IS uber, after all...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:00:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
although.. it seems that it's pretty darn easy to pick which writing is mine.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:48:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
and we all know IT'S THE ANONYMOUS VOTE THAT COUNTS MOSTESTESTEST!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:40:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:37:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
How did I make it this far? I'm SERIOUSLY outclassed by the writing this round.
--
You've done some nice writing. I think the assigned title thing is a killer for you, but stick with the writing. Of course, I never seem to vote for you, but still...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:37:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How did I make it this far? I'm SERIOUSLY outclassed by the writing this round.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:34:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:20:05 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, if "I didn't read this, I just saw how long each was" is any indication...
--
I've gotten that before. That, and dumbasses who say, "#1 had a better picture." Fucking lame shit.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:28:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
darko,
I agree. This ain't 'Nam, there are rules here.
I've posted at the last minute all five times, and I'm pretty sure I was late by a minute or so in Round 2. What changed since then?
The OTHER THING is that why does it even default to posting under my own name after the deadline? Shouldn't it not allow me to post at all since it started in the UM submission window. The way it works now, it will be obvious to people paying attention what my opponents' title is when it comes up "anonymous" as a UM post with mine as a forfeit. I'm sure that in some ways "violates the spirit of Ubermadness".
Because if I had tried to start the submission process after the deadline, the link to UM wouldn't show up and I wouldn't then post the story under my name.
Again, I'm out, kaos is in. Bad timing, my fault, gnashing of teeth and all that.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:20:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, if "I didn't read this, I just saw how long each was" is any indication...
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:14:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy fuck, Coley is still in this?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:12:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:06:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
How bout both of you forfeit, and I take the spot?
The way things are looking, I'm going to lose simply because my story is longer.
-------------------------------
If you lose because of length, it's because you failed to grab onto and keep the readers attention with your story.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:10:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:31:11 (#)
Ranking: 0
EITHER WAY,
This is the second week in a row where I clearly had a story lined up for the deadline and tried to submit it before noon. Other than that I have no excuses.
------------------------------
And the second week in a row that you waited until after 11:50 to try to submit it. Twice now you've tried to post at the very last minute, and twice you missed the cut-off time. Either you are going by your time and not uber time (clocks could differ) or you have a slow connection where it takes a while to upload posts to ubersite. Either way the simple solution would have been to post earlier. Don't blame Ubersite for this.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 14:06:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How bout both of you forfeit, and I take the spot?
The way things are looking, I'm going to lose simply because my story is longer.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:58:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm willing to bet dollars to donuts that this is all part of some arcane conspiracy engineered to guarantee kaos rises to the top and wins this fucking thing.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:55:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Kaos-king,
Let everyone see when your submission gets posted.
You put the time and effort in, submitted it 2 hours ahead of time, and I didn't.
Your effort will prove to outshine mine, I'm sure. Hell, I didn't even submit ahead of time LAST WEEK.
The only reason I'm giving any type of defense is so people don't think I'm a complete jackass (i.e, that there are some factors beyond my control).
I think you should advance.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:43:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is ridiculous.
There's no reason that I should advance due to this situation.
Hell, I shouldn't have been in this round to begin with.
Simply put, I can not accept Murphy's forfeit without casting my own.
What a wonderful clusterfuck...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:39:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
does that make any kind of sense?
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:37:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Kaos - I think something is wrong with the way Coleslaw submissions are being processed. For some reason they aren't being recognized by the UM "bot" thing.
As such, your entry is currently waiting for it's match-up to be submitted (as Cole's wasn't recognized) so it will go up as if it were up against a forfeit.
Any pairing in which one participant forfiets has to be posted manually, so Kaos's submission will probably appear later tonight.
Not lost, just not recognized as having a match.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:31:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
EITHER WAY,
This is the second week in a row where I clearly had a story lined up for the deadline and tried to submit it before noon. Other than that I have no excuses.
Do you think I am waiting until a minute after noon to post my story, written for and with the UM title, then posting it under my name normally? That doesn't make sense.
Ask Bart whether my submission started in the UM submission window. He should be able to tell you.
Bottom line is, I'll take my forfeit. I clearly haven't made it a priority to write and submit a day or two ahead of time (I wrote it last night, and it's certainly not as long or developed as I'd wanted).
Believe me, I am just as bloody-eyed as kaos-king over my bad timing. And also, because it seems that the work that I put in on last week's title "Rewired" was irrelevant to the contest. And I liked how that one turned out a lot better than this one.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:29:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Deep Forest Submitted by UberMadness! at 2006-11-21 12:01:21
Almost Full Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy at 2006-11-21 12:01:03
This was the basis for my arguement last time in Murphy's defense!!!
How did this occur when I posted my entry around 10am this morning?
I know it was a shitty tale, but I can't believe it was THAT bad that Uber's programing just chose to ignore it.
Can someone please find my story?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:29:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:22:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
kaos,
If mine shows up as a forfeit, then yours went through and Bart just needs to manually post the title (like has has to do for all matchups that have a forfeit).
That would mean, though, that he had changed the code for the UM submission at some point, to NOT allow late posts. This makes sense, but did he do it AFTER round 2? And why is there a UM submission right after my post? Does it take 5 minutes or so to take effect once both people submit?
-------------------------
The post was submitted before yours. You submit the post and have it go through before noon, and then it waits a while before posting it, as opposed to uber posts that auto submit when you hit submit.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:24:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:22:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
Jack, if you don't vote for my story this round, I will kill you for breaking my streak.
--
I'm not even gonna read your's until kk's tale appears.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:22:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jack, if you don't vote for my story this round, I will kill you for breaking my streak.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:22:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
kaos,
If mine shows up as a forfeit, then yours went through and Bart just needs to manually post the title (like has has to do for all matchups that have a forfeit).
That would mean, though, that he had changed the code for the UM submission at some point, to NOT allow late posts. This makes sense, but did he do it AFTER round 2? And why is there a UM submission right after my post? Does it take 5 minutes or so to take effect once both people submit?
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:21:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The Ubermadness bot takes a little while to post the entries. Happened to me last week.
I posted it at 11:55ish but the timestamp read as a little after noon. I'm pretty sure the post is fine.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:17:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I get you Murph, I was just being cranky.
And kaos, if I were you I'd be so angry blood would be pouring out of my eyes.
My question is, does the UM match posted AFTER yours count, or is it a double forfeit for being late?
Deep Forest Submitted by UberMadness! at 2006-11-21 12:01:21
Almost Full Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy at 2006-11-21 12:01:03
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:13:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Murphy makes a good point.
I can understand what happened last time, but why did it happen again?
And, uh... where the hell did MY submission go then?
I would have assumed it would have appeared on the front page against an (incorrect) forfeit.
Did Bart eat my UM post???
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:06:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jack, Snark, UM contestants,
Last week, it wasn't merely that I posted late. It was that I posted late AND my opponent hadn't submitted anything yet.
I've posted the same way the past five rounds. I click Submit, click on the link on the right for my UM title, it opens and auto-fills the title. I paste my story, preview it for formatting and spell/grammar check one last time, correct formatting if necessary, and hit Hook Me Up.
My lunch break STARTS at 11:45am, so I can't get on there until then. I have to login to email, get my story, and then do what's listed in the paragraph above.
I'm almost CERTAIN that I ended up submitting about a minute late when I faced Sicosemen in Round 2 (something happened to his submission that round too), and maybe in rounds 1 & 3 as well, and it wasn't a big deal.
I thought that if kaos-king submitted already, then my minute late submission wouldn't do what it did last week.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-21 13:04:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Noon Uber time. Bart does not live on Uber Time.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:58:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I need clarification on the deadline thing.
Is it noon EST time?
Or is it noon Bart-Bart time, a.k.a. 1pm EST?
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:48:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yes, it does.. and it hurts because mine was soooooooooooooo bad for me!!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:23:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Man, this round has all the kick-ass titles.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:14:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What the fuck??? (repeat)
I submitted my post around 10am today!!!
It's, like, seven pages long with a photo attachment and everything!
Granted, it was a crap story, but I went to submit, clicked the link on the right and did everything as usual.
What the fuck is going on????
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:12:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
IT'S BECAUSE YOU POSTED LATE!
WHY DID YOU MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:11:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:09:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn, the UM submission happened the same as last week.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96017
I guess kaos-king didn't submit anything before the deadline either.
--
Explain in more detail, please...
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:09:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn, the UM submission happened the same as last week.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96017
I guess kaos-king didn't submit anything before the deadline either.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-21 12:03:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm watching these titles appear and crying as each new one goes up.
DAMN My limitations!!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 11:55:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy fuck there are a lot of meaty entries this time around. Excellent!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 11:54:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Looks like 2 to 4 people have about 6 minutes to get their submissions in.
Cue Mission Impossible theme...
PS - Until I corrected it, I had misspelled minutes as 'minjures.' What the hell, man.
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-21 10:18:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-11-21 08:45:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah, and I smell like sweaty asscrack.
----------------------
How is that any different than usual?
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-11-21 08:45:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah, and I smell like sweaty asscrack.
I will jump in the shower presently.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-11-21 08:44:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've been up all night writing an essay which articulates the differences and similarities between the policy decisions of Robert McNamara during the Cuban Missile Crisis and the Vietnam War to the ongoing policies of the Bush Administration in Iraq.
I am very tired.
I have a burst blood vessel in my right eye.
My left foot keeps twitching.
I have masturbated 14 times tonight just to stay awake.
It's not even fun anymore.
I have a wedgie.
My spine is damaged beyond repair from sitting in this uncomfortable position all night.
My toes are cold.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-21 00:11:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm proofreading my pile of garbage right now so I go out like a man and not forfeit like a quitter.
I'm ready to die.
I'm ready to take my medicine.
I wrote a story about NOTHING and I'm damned proud of it.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-21 00:03:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
12 hours and 10 posts have yet to appear.
Jesus wept.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:32:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
14.5 hours left. Whom will forfeit, and why???
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:29:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:19:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
If it makes you feel any better Bubba, my dad is a year older than you are. No I'm just kidding, that shouldn't make you feel better. :D
***
Oh yeah?? Well, I whupped yer dad's ass in the contest back in '65, and I remember...
"Hey, Ma, bring me another beer. What? Don't you ever tell me to shut up about that, you lazy
little...Huh? He kicked my ass? I don't remember nuthin...."
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:19:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If it makes you feel any better Bubba, my dad is a year older than you are. No I'm just kidding, that shouldn't make you feel better. :D
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:10:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:08:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
wow - playboy has been around FOREVER then, hasn't it?
</endcheekycommentary>
*****
Not forever, child, not forever. Only since 1953. I was 4 years old....
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:08:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow - playboy has been around FOREVER then, hasn't it?
</endcheekycommentary>
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:04:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:02:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
heh Right-wanger
--
Actually I'm ambidexterous (sp?).
I decided that might be a good thing when I was 11 years old and found my dad's Playboy stash.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:02:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heh Right-wanger
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:58:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:54:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, I'm beginning to think he's waaaaaaaaaaaay beyond mere coffee..
***
C'mon now, young lady. A Repubican Right-Wanger like Jack has never even READ about drugs, let alone tak... never mind...
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:55:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Take_A_Drag _On _The _Roach had better not forfeit this round. He beat me because Snark hates me and wants to see my Grandchildren die in a nuclear war, but that is no excuse. Post it, DragDude, or I will find you and shove you and Snark up each other's asses....
:-D
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:54:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, I'm beginning to think he's waaaaaaaaaaaay beyond mere coffee..
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:52:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
15 hours left, and only one of ten has been posted. Any bets on how many forfeits this time? I say two....
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:25:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jack, put down the mug of high-test coffee and step away...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 19:13:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*ejaculates*
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-20 19:13:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
January IS just around the corner, and that means nothing if not the new single from Amon Tobin's 'Foley Room'!!!
Don't know who this is or what this means? Find yourself asking, "What's an Amon Tobin?"
Well, my friend, I have a treat for you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvodRa9Md1Q
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:41:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, if there's one thing I hate it's when I accidentally slug myself in the nuts.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:41:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, January is just around the corner and you know what that means.
A whole new year of...
24!
And Jack Bauer kicking ass! YEAH!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:37:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn it, THIS is why this country needs the draft and needs it now.
Fuck Iraq, we need to teach the young people of today how to follow through on commitments and stay on schedule, gar dammit! Military discipline would be just the thing!
Did I say stand easy, you fucker? Did I say you could SLOUCH on my parade ground?
Who the FUCK do you think you are, mister?
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:19:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jack, do you want me to just send you my entry? Would that appease your monstrous appetite for UM entries?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:17:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
V
V
V
V
V
UberMadness! Real Time Scoreboard
Round Five | Round Four | Round Three | Round Two | Round One
There are no entries for this round yet.
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Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:14:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:51:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
why is it that ..well, ok, bluntly, very obviously over-weight...(some might even say a specific subset of that - the WT) women seem to think that leopard print ANYTHING is a) appropriate to wear to work and b) ever right on them?
--
To help out us men-folk, being mostly ignorant and all, I suggest you post a picture of the beast you are referring to, as well as one of yourself, in a skin tight leopard print, say, sprawling on a stark white polar bear skin rug, or crawling toward the camera on all fours with your cute l'il butt up in the air, so we can compare the two and say, "Damn it, Crystle is right AGAIN!"
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:10:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:51:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't been screwing around. I've just had no ideas that don't revolve around posting a picture of a giant boob and calling it a day.
--
A thinly-veiled attempt at making fun of the exquisite self-portait I sent you last week. Bastard.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:08:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Dammit! I spent two straight days working on my entry, only to have it go against a drunk post?
You better be the writing equivalent of Drunken Master, buddy!
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:06:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:25:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
I get the feeling that ALL OF US were the kind of kids in grade school who would be scrambling on a Sunday night to complete a project for presentation to the class on Monday morning when we had three weeks to do the thing and spent the time screwing around.
-------------------------------
While that is true, and it was Monday morning, not Sunday night. That aside, this was a busy ass week at Columbia too. I had 10 page mininum research papers due on Wednesday and Friday last week. I'm still going to turn something in, but I think this is going to be the end of the line for me.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:51:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
why is it that ..well, ok, bluntly, very obviously over-weight...(some might even say a specific subset of that - the WT) women seem to think that leopard print ANYTHING is a) appropriate to wear to work and b) ever right on them?
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:51:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't been screwing around. I've just had no ideas that don't revolve around posting a picture of a giant boob and calling it a day.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:50:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
They'll be waiting until the deadline, FAC.
Just so happens that from last Tuesday to tonight was finals week here at ol' Ohio University. (GO BOBCATS?) So I was kinda busy. Still am. Got another final tonight and then I'll be getting fucking wasted.
So I'll either be writing drunk as fuck or hungover as hell.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:35:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jack, when you finally get to find out which was my story, you'll take that back. At least for me.
I worked fucking harrrrrrd on my story.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 16:25:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I take care of a ton of work, run out to the dentist and nearly piss in my pants when he does a few things w/o anesthetic "to save time" and buy a couple cartons of smokes and finally get back into Uber and see that ther are no stories posted yet.
I get the feeling that ALL OF US were the kind of kids in grade school who would be scrambling on a Sunday night to complete a project for presentation to the class on Monday morning when we had three weeks to do the thing and spent the time screwing around.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 15:27:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:44:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
When my post goes up later today, oh trust me, you'll have something to read. You'lllllll have something to read.
~~~
I amend my previous statement to read, "When my opponent's post goes up later today, oh trust me, you'll have something to read. You'lllllll have something to read."
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:41:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:24:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
Less than 24 hours remain everyone!
--
The Spark sneaks!
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:32:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It was meant to be more self-deprecating than anything.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:31:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:29:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha, sorry Snark.
Judging by your quick response, that comment was inappropriate.
=============
Actually, I saw yours after I posted it.
Sorry I ruined a perfectly good psyche attempt.
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:29:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha, sorry Snark.
Judging by your quick response, that comment was inappropriate.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:24:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Less than 24 hours remain everyone!
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Read the post idiots -- submission deadline is NEXT Tuesday.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 13:00:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*must resist leading remark*
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:53:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*building gets a good taste of Jack*
PTUI!
*Jack lands on street. Shrugs. Lights cigarette and takes a short break*
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:51:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*floor laughs, opens mouth*
*Jack falls into throat of building*
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:49:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*rolls on floor surrounded by concerned co-workers*
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:49:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WHAT ARE YOU ON JACK!?!?!?
can I have some? It might help me write this damn thing..
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:48:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what the
Holy fuck there are BUGS CRAWKLING ONM MY FUCKLING ARMN !WYt1er624
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:47:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:44:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
When my post goes up later today, oh trust me, you'll have something to read. You'lllllll have something to read.
--
If Uber was a porn movie this would read, "Baby, this fucking thing is HUGE and you are gonna TAKE it ALLLLL!"
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:45:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*fast dung beetle roll out of harm's way*
*one-winged fly corkscrew kick to groin*
*dumping dragon mid-air feces launch*
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:45:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jack - you're worrying me a bit.
Have you had your coffee and smoke yet this morning?
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:44:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
When my post goes up later today, oh trust me, you'll have something to read. You'lllllll have something to read.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:42:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I see you sneaking up behind me-
*SLAP!*
HA! How does it feel to be on your knees, Huh?
All right, where are the rest of you filty bastards! Come on!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:41:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:38:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY!! STOP THAT!!
It's only monday morning here, and you know it!
You're making it harder!
--
...must resist...making...vulgar response...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:38:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
my head hurts
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:38:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY!! STOP THAT!!
It's only monday morning here, and you know it!
You're making it harder!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:32:07 (#)
Ranking: 0
And PS will all you motherfuckers pull your thumbs out? It's Monday afternoon already.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:37:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm so fucking frustrated I just bit my desk! Damn, those teeth marks will be there long after I have departed. I have left... my mark on the WORLD! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:36:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
nnnngh!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:35:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I see you sniggering! You're gonna die with that stupid loom on your face, kid. Come on, damn you!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:35:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Come on you bastards! Come on you motherfuckers! I'll take you all on! Come on, godammit! Look, one hand behind my back, one eyes shut, one testicle clamped in the jaws of an iguana. Come on, you lousy bastards, let's see what you've got!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:32:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
And PS will all you motherfuckers pull your thumbs out? It's Monday afternoon already. Jesus H. Christ. The front page of uber has been shitville ever since Rad put up that 'look at me sticking up for the abused I'm such a nice guy doesn't that entitle me to a sympathy blowjob?' post, and until we get some decent reading material it's gonna stay that way.
Fuck.
Goddamn it.
Shit.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:28:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:23:47 (#)
Ranking: 2
My title is a little bitch. When first looked it, it seems good, but I've been having a helluva time coming up with a decent story that wasn't obvious as shit.
--
I hear ya.
My title is similar, with two blatantly obvious ways to go. By taking neither, I may have boned myself.
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:23:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My title is a little bitch. When first looked it, it seems good, but I've been having a helluva time coming up with a decent story that wasn't obvious as shit.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:57:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love the gentleness of that shove, Joey...
I know, you LOVE the title and have written the most kick-ass story evar! and I'm still wrestling. I SHOULD just forfiet, but you deserve the gloating satisfaction of actually beating me, so I'm attempting to provide it.
hate the title.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:52:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am hereby serving stevie with official notice that I am fucked. Work last week and this week gave me only the weekend to blow through a tale, so I am boned.
Take it home, stevie.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:48:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So, just over 24 hours left, and no entries yet???
Is everyone planning to post at 11.59 on Tuesday in an attempt to bring down the Ubersite server? Or are there a whole bunch of forfeits this round?
God damn, I want something to read!!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:22:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hellooooooooooo....
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-19 21:59:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-19 15:53:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Sunday afternoon and not one post up. Damn.
Gonna be another clusterfuck Monday.
******
38 hours to go....
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-19 16:38:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
just got home from a weekend trip. lots of homework to do. looks like i'll have to find time to write mine tomorrow.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-19 15:53:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sunday afternoon and not one post up. Damn.
Gonna be another clusterfuck Monday.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-19 14:39:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is still going on?
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-19 14:22:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh big suprise, FAC wrote something awesome. Because THAT never happens...
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2006-11-19 05:33:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nerfherder...I sure hope you've got something amazing in store. You're gonna need it.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-11-17 16:22:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
JMG114 aka JARED:
please email me asap!
rockfishrock.at.gmail.com
thank you
~n
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-16 15:42:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ha-ha
ho-ho-ho-haw-haw. hee-hee-hee-hee-hee.
bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahahaah!!!!!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-16 13:31:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
grrrrrrrrrrrrrr
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-11-16 03:51:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry honey, but this is the best title I've had so far!
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2006-11-16 11:00:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Have no fear DrogoRoch, best I've got is a four line drama about nose hair.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-11-16 08:58:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn this competition. I keep looking at my title and the only thing going through my mind is sexual diseases and it disturbs me.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-11-16 03:51:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-14 21:15:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Even worse, I suspect the title will be NO ISSUE for JoeyG..
---------------------------------------------
Sorry honey, but this is the best title I've had so far!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-15 19:22:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I now have a new goal.
I'm gonna go insane. Should be a short trip.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-15 18:13:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, sometimes all it takes is a comfy pair of socks to improve your whole attitude.
Works for me, anyhow.
In other news, a woman in my neighborhood who is a known whackjob got an eviction notice and tried to burn down her home out of spite. Her mother was in the home at the time. The good news is that the local fire department is about a quarter of a mile down the road. The bad news is that since this is California, the wretched beast will probably be declared insane and unfit for employment and get free housing for the rest of her life.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-11-14 23:07:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My title satisfies me.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-14 22:49:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i like my title immensely
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-14 22:00:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:01:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
I couldn't have gotten a worse title.
Seriously, the is the worst title for me. For many of you others it would be fine, but I think a piece of me just died on seeing it.
-------
must be something gory
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-14 21:15:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Even worse, I suspect the title will be NO ISSUE for JoeyG..
*mumbledcurses*
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:51:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I jusr got the perfect idea.
And flushed it down the toilet when I realized I would have to do days worth of research for a few pages of story.
Nards.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:49:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:35:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:56:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 15:49:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
I sense that our title will be good.
Gooooood.
Jesus Christ. This title just INVITES the longest, most drawn out thing since...since ever. Jesus. Satan in the streets.
I be fucked.
--
AGREED.
The most obvious choice for me would be TOO obvious... and that may go for you as well, even though we would do radically different stories.
Hmmm...
Time to start from fucking scratch.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:35:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:56:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 15:49:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
I sense that our title will be good.
Gooooood.
Jesus Christ. This title just INVITES the longest, most drawn out thing since...since ever. Jesus. Satan in the streets.
I be fucked.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:08:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-14 16:45:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
DON'T BEAT ME WITH THE BELT AGAIN, DAD! I'LL CLEAN YOUR BOOTS! I'LL FLUFF YOUR HAT!
--------------------------
stevie is Snark's fluffer.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-14 18:01:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I couldn't have gotten a worse title.
Seriously, the is the worst title for me. For many of you others it would be fine, but I think a piece of me just died on seeing it.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:56:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 15:49:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
I sense that our title will be good.
Gooooood.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:50:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:44:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-08 01:04:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-07 15:58:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
I would like to nominate Entry 1 of 'The Fetishist' as THE best story of this round. It kicks ass.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95441
=======================
A very very good read.
------------
I think this needs addressing. You shouldn't be talking about the UM posts outside of the reviews on that post. Isn't the whole point that nobody should see the reviews or votes, so as not to be influenced? Before clicking that post, I knew who Jack had voted for, and his reasons for doing so. It's not THAT big a deal (McCallum picking the story over the joke was pretty obvious) but still don't think it should happen.
--
You have a point.
In my defense, I was very excited to read an UberMadness entry with an actual beginning, middle, and end, a plot, a plot twist, and a great use of the title contrary to the expected ubersmut, not to mention good clean writing and brisk pacing.
My excitement got the better of me.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:44:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks, Shaun, right back at you.
----------------------
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-08 01:04:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-07 15:58:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
I would like to nominate Entry 1 of 'The Fetishist' as THE best story of this round. It kicks ass.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95441
=======================
A very very good read.
------------
I think this needs addressing. You shouldn't be talking about the UM posts outside of the reviews on that post. Isn't the whole point that nobody should see the reviews or votes, so as not to be influenced? Before clicking that post, I knew who Jack had voted for, and his reasons for doing so. It's not THAT big a deal (McCallum picking the story over the joke was pretty obvious) but still don't think it should happen.
Submitted by Shaun_Rocks (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:32:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Best of luck Stagger_Lee
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:23:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:18:04 (#)
Ranking: 1
I got a title now, thanks...
========
Just a gentle reminder for ya Kaos
NOON NEXT TUESDAY FOO!
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:22:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a title.
Yay!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-14 17:18:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I got a ti