Alexis Brennan Is A Cunt (871 hits)
Category: NewsRating: 0.54 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Five Star General (View user info) at 2006-11-17 17:16:32 EST
We all know Alexis Brennan.
She is married to Michael Brennan (attorney/doctor/vice president of X company) to pay for her spending habits.
She is well dressed, and well groomed. Her blond hair is rarely out of place as she routinely visits her hair stylist to always keep things neat. The stylist is one of the best in the city and the amount she spends on hair care in a year would outweigh what normal people spend in a lifetime.
Her routine is busy. Hitting the spa, an hour on a treadmill at the newest fitness center, shopping at the mall, and, finally, dinner at Spago with her friends where she will brag about Michael's success and show off her new diamond earrings.
There is nothing worse to cramp your style than a small child. But, as she well knows, having a child will secure her position as the non-working care provider of the youngster. It means getting a fancy, high-end child seat to place in her Acura SUV.
The child will be burdensome at times. But it shouldn't get in the way of stopping at the local Starbuck's Coffee for a snooty, overpriced caffeinated drink.
Strapped securely in the child seat, Rachel needs to be groomed into the job of the over-privileged and spoiled only child that Alexis wasn't. A double latte might be pushing it for a young child who is still small enough to require a car seat, but a hot chocolate with whipped cream should do.
Stop inside to drink the beverage in comfort? Never. The weekly appointment with the massage therapist can't be pushed off.
Rachel's young hands reach out to hold the cup of hot chocolate as it is passed backward. Moments later it is in her lap and she is crying in pain.
What went wrong?
Blame Starbucks.
Alexis Brennan, you are stupid. In the real world, people know hot chocolate is hot. Commoners usually make it at home by boiling a pot of water on the stove and mixing it with a powdered bag of Swiss miss. If you have never burned your taste buds off with hot chocolate, you have never drank HOT chocolate. It is often served in a coffee cup and must sit for quite some time before it is cool enough to drink.
What has Alexis Brennan learned from the incident? First, you blame and sue others for stupid acts commit by yourself.
Second, Alexis will now be drinking Vanilla Crème Frappuccino instead of hot chocolate when you drive to your next undeserved appointment to improve your life.
User Reviews
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-01-11 16:56:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by dexpaxas (user info) at 2007-01-11 16:44:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
an explanation post to follow...
_________
I'm looking forward to that post
Submitted by dexpaxas (user info) at 2007-01-11 16:44:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
an explanation post to follow...
Submitted by RPharazon (user info) at 2006-11-19 15:49:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I would clap my hands if they weren't holding a hot chocolate in one hand and typing on the other.
Submitted by Biotch (user info) at 2006-11-18 00:10:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did not read b/c way too drunk... but +2 just b/c!!
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2006-11-17 21:30:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The Brennan's live in Indiana, they are therefore, not important.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-17 21:03:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Just one more data bit showing that people are stupid...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-11-17 19:39:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hopefully she was arrested for felony child abuse
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-17 19:34:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-17 19:19:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WICHITA, Kan. (AP) - A botched kidnapping ended with one of the assailants shooting himself in the groin, police said.
The man had just stuck the gun in his waistband when it fired, shooting him in the left testicle, authorities said. He cringed, causing the gun to fire again and strike him in the left calf, they said.
The 23-year-old man managed to walk into a hospital for treatment. He and his two alleged accomplices, ages 18 and 20, were arrested on attempted kidnapping charges. They were accused of trying to kidnap a teenager in a dispute over stereo speakers.
© The Canadian Press
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2006-11-17 17:44:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bravo... What a stupid whore!
By the way this is what he's talking about: http://www.indystar.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2006611160497
Submitted by beauxjizzle (user info) at 2006-11-17 17:31:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
who the hell are the brennans again?
Submitted by FiveStarGeneral (user info) at 2006-11-17 17:24:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Here is the story:
http://www.theindychannel.com/news/10328140/detail.html
I don't buy their phony excuse that some lawyer told her to stick with 2 years later when the paperwork was finally filed.