Vergil #2 (585 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 2 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by garudave <misterkick.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-11-19 21:14:14 EST
Three hundred miles out, eight hours into our journey, Vergil and I made an educated decision to rob a liquor store.
It was late, around nine o', when we pulled into a town called Woonsark and lurked a bit. There were about four places that looked worth busting, so we picked the one with the dimmest parking lot. Vergil crawled in the back seat and tried to look like a potted plant, while I ran in with both pistols tucked in my belt.
I took my time and walked around the store. Practically all the items were expired. I figured the owners were foreign and had no concept of stock rotation, before I realized I was thinking too much. It was about then that I approached the front desk.
There sat a midget, watching some Spanish show on a small TV. I narrowed my eyes at him. "Can I help you, sir?" he asked in a helium-breather's voice.
I pulled both guns out so he knew I wasn't playing around. "All the money in your register." I paused like a badass and then continued, "Now."
Like lightning, that little fucker dropped to the ground and started plugging rounds through the bottom of the front desk. He got off about four misses before I realized what was going on and ran off to the right.
"You're surrounded, motherfucker!" a small voice shouted from my left, where stood another dwarf with a shotgun. The sight was hilariously bizarre, so I laughed, practically in her face. "Stop laughing!" she yelled, but I didn't, and I ran away from her, down an aisle stocked with chips.
Chaos ensued. Her shotgun blasts and his peashooter caused Doritos and Lays to rain on my head. I'm not quite sure how I didn't get hit, but I was able to get out of there before any real damage was done. I fired back after I had exited, keeping the little people at bay while Vergil started the mobile.
We took off, and I was dying laughing. "Did you get any cash?" he asked, with his voice sounding like a cement truck (it was that gravelly).
I stopped laughing. "Nah, that joint was fuckin' broke." I picked a barbecue chip out of my hair and ate it. The road seemed to grow longer. I couldn't bring myself to care.
User Reviews
Submitted by manic_impressive (user info) at 2007-03-03 20:59:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-03-03 20:35:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2006-11-20 22:59:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by august_sobriquet (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:23:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
man, then end of that was awesome. cool stuff.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:44:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-11-20 03:44:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant keep it going please.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-11-19 22:50:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow
Submitted by garudave (user info) at 2006-11-19 21:49:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95843
That's the first one, I forgot to include it.
sry!
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-11-19 21:39:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"insert witty comment here*
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-11-19 21:24:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment