The Uber Man (905 hits)
Category: Sound & MusicLabels: captainthorns_music
Rating: 1.89 on 49 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by CaptainThorns (View user info) at 2006-11-20 08:35:42 EST
Someone requested a "Piano Man" parody a long time ago, and it's been written for a while...finally got around to doing a quick recording over the weekend. Piano, bass, drums, and vocals...enjoy!
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It's nine o'clock on a working day
Regular crowd's logging in
There's an old man waiting there for me
Yes, it's probably Shlongy again
He says, "Son, can you write me a parody?
I'm not really sure how it goes,
But it's rude and it's great and made women fellate me
When I wore a younger man's clothes."
La la la, de de da
La la, de de da da dum
Make us a song just for Uber, man
Make us a song tonight
'Cause we're all in the mood for a melody
And your notes provide us delight
Now Orgasmatron is a friend of mine
He writes half my songs for me [EDITOR'S NOTE: he didn't write THIS song for me!]
And he's quick with a joke or a poem to provoke
But there's someplace that he'd rather be
He says, "Thorns, I believe this is killing me."
As the smile ran away from his face
"Well I'm sure that I could be a poet laureate
If I could get out of this place"
Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de da da dum
Make us a song just for Uber, man
Make us a song tonight
'Cause we're all in the mood for a melody
And your notes provide us delight
And Wardy's a nuclear physicist
Whose school doesn't leave time for a wife
Tiger's talkin' with Kracka, who's still in Iraq-a
And probably will be for life
And Brad Linzy is practicing politics
As the users all bitch, piss, and moan
Yes, they're surfing a site made for loneliness
But it's better than surfing alone
La la la, de de da
La la, de de da da dum
Make us a song just for Uber, man
Make us a song tonight
'Cause we're all in the mood for a melody
And your notes provide us with delight
It's a pretty good crowd for a Monday morn'
And the site owner gives me a two
'Cause he knows that it's me they've been comin' to see
To forget what they're all s'posed to do
And the sound card erupts with lush harmonies
From a song that I know will make heat
As they sit on my post, logged in from coast to coast,
And say, "This sure beats spanking my meat!"
Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de da da dum
Make us a song just for Uber, man
Make us a song tonight
'Cause we're all in the mood for a melody
And your notes provide us with delight
uberman.mp3 (4 MB) [audio/mpeg]
User Reviews
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-21 10:54:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-21 10:45:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
I gotta say...this may be one of my favorites of yours.
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Appreciate that...it's definitely one of my stronger songs, at least lyrically speaking.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-21 10:45:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I gotta say...this may be one of my favorites of yours.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-21 08:43:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:02:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The poor man's Orgasmatron.
==============================
*snort*
Wee Willie, that was the first comment of yours I've actually laughed out loud at. :)
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 23:09:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:47:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:02:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The poor man's Orgasmatron.
---
Heh.
=========================
Don't heh.
You're the poor man's McGonagall.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 21:47:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:02:08 (#)
Ranking: 0
The poor man's Orgasmatron.
---
Heh.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:48:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Make that TWO stanzas.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-20 20:46:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Like I really need to waste any time reading anything past the first paragraph.
God, am I transparent. And easy.
And fucking wonderful.
Submitted by Kracka (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:15:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:08:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Or the James Brown of Ubersite.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-20 18:02:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The poor man's Orgasmatron.
Submitted by littledan (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:49:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Absolutely fantastic!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:37:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yep, still awesome.
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-11-20 17:23:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well done. (Vocals had a bit too much echo?)
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:44:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
best song....
evar.
Submitted by jfreakman (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:40:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you, this parody, and that song.
More or less in that order.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:25:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
OH EVERYONE LOVES A (hardwood waxing) LINKWHORE: http://www.ubersite.com/m/82935#1804352
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:21:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:15:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
ahumblefool's lying.
He's getting his hardwood floors waxed again.
_________________
Shhhh... that was our secret!
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:20:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:07:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
you type with your feet?
_____________________
Got a problem with that! It's tough, but man, what you can accomplish with ten digits, well eleven after years of hard work and training
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:15:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ahumblefool's lying.
He's getting his hardwood floors waxed again.
[don't make me link the poems]
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 14:07:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
you type with your feet?
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 13:53:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Captain, I would type something witty in return, but I am currently receiving a pedicure and I do not want to chip a nail.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 13:03:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Latte-dueling fags below... :)
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|
v
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:46:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your fingered dart shall not penetrate me.
Envy my codpiece of woe, friend.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:46:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:41:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:29:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's Gingerbread Latte or nothing, ahumblefool!
That's it. That settles it.
STEAMED MILK AND COFFEE BEANS AT DAWN, GOOD SIR!
Bring a second in case you cannot perform your duties as a combatant.
_____________________________________
Thou shalt not speak poorly of thy egg nog latte good sir. I accept your challenge posthaste and shalt deal you a severe blow.
Scratch that, a severe blow on this site is too sexual.
I shalt deal you a severe head whacking.
That tis no better
Fuck it.... I shalt crumple you and your gingerbread latte.
===
*Pulls up chair, sips Peppermint Mocha amusedly*
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:41:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:29:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's Gingerbread Latte or nothing, ahumblefool!
That's it. That settles it.
STEAMED MILK AND COFFEE BEANS AT DAWN, GOOD SIR!
Bring a second in case you cannot perform your duties as a combatant.
_____________________________________
Thou shalt not speak poorly of thy egg nog latte good sir. I accept your challenge posthaste and shalt deal you a severe blow.
Scratch that, a severe blow on this site is too sexual.
I shalt deal you a severe head whacking.
That tis no better
Fuck it.... I shalt crumple you and your gingerbread latte.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:40:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:29:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:29:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's Gingerbread Latte or nothing, ahumblefool!
That's it. That settles it.
STEAMED MILK AND COFFEE BEANS AT DAWN, GOOD SIR!
Bring a second in case you cannot perform your duties as a combatant.
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-20 12:25:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Egg Nog Latte through the nose good!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:17:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like how you say "laureate."
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-20 11:02:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:53:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
And wait 'till you see what's coming tomorrow...
===
Ooh I hope it's ME.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:55:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:53:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
And wait 'till you see what's coming tomorrow...
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I'll be coming tomorrow...........
.....IN MY PANTS.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:53:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:52:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a quick recording? Sounds great, Cap'n.
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*nods* About an hour and a half of work...mostly on the piano part!
And wait 'till you see what's coming tomorrow...
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:52:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent work!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:52:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:23:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
pssst... <kracka's back from the war...>
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You know, I was WONDERING about that as I recorded this on Saturday...but hey, it was a good verse, right?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:52:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a quick recording? Sounds great, Cap'n.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:23:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pssst... <kracka's back from the war...>
linkhoer!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94557
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:19:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fantastic.
Good show Thorns.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:04:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
But really, this doesn't need "auto +2 _____." Why? Becuase it rocks, that's why. Well, it doesn't so much rock as...float. It begs the listener sit in its comfortable embrace like baby monkeys in a bowl of warm milk. Like flu vaccine in a jar of afterbirth. Like Tiger's tits in my mouth. But you get my point.
And hey, who am I to deny further uberImmortality?
Good harmonica and piano work, my good man.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-20 10:01:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 "Iraq-a"
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 09:50:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2006-11-20 09:43:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Watch out man, when I move to my new place, me and my roommates are gonna set up a sweet recording station. The competition will begin...muahahahahaaa.
So yeah, awesome job.
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Nice, and I'll gladly pass the torch on to you...if you want it!
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2006-11-20 09:43:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Watch out man, when I move to my new place, me and my roommates are gonna set up a sweet recording station. The competition will begin...muahahahahaaa.
So yeah, awesome job.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-11-20 09:30:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
kick ass
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-11-20 09:22:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-11-20 08:49:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't listen, but you know you done did it.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2006-11-20 08:44:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is one of those gems ...
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2006-11-20 08:40:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't listen to it at work but +2 for the lyrics.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-20 08:37:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
cawbawcbwabcwb
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-20 08:36:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh yeah, and harmonica too...how could I forget THAT? I hardly ever get to play it. :)