Pink Cloud (1297 hits)
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Rating: 1.89 on 61 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jack McCallum (View user info) at 2006-11-22 13:14:06 EST
I sat on the edge of my brother's bed and watched the videotape to the end. It didn't take long. He must have recorded this himself, long ago, from some TV special. The picture quality was terrible, jumpy and smeared, but I knew what I was looking at.
My brother's name was Marty. He was my older brother. Today he would be described as developmentally disabled, but Marty wasn't afraid to call himself a retard.
"My name is Marty," he would say to complete strangers, in slightly slurred speech. "I am a retard. But I am also a really nice guy."
Some of the people hearing this for the first time laughed or made fun of him. It was inevitable. But most people just smiled. Marty made a hell of a lot of people smile in his day.
I came home for Marty's funeral three days ago. He wasn't supposed to make it past thirty, so the last eight years were a gift. I was busy with work and my own family, but I always came back to the old family home to be with mom and dad and Marty on the holidays.
On this trip home I was filled with guilt, because part of me was relieved Marty had died in his sleep. I often wondered who would take care of him after mom and dad were gone. I loved my brother dearly, but he was like a six year old. He could drive you nuts.
I decided to attend the funeral without my wife and son. I figured he was a bit too young for that just yet. Anna stayed home with him. When he thought of Marty he thought of a funny clown who got down on the floor and played with him. I didn't want to spoil that just yet.
I rode my bike home, just a couple of hundred miles. I wore the battered old steel pot I'd been wearing for twelve years now, the one with the dimple on one side. The helmet was not DOT approved, but I wouldn't wear anything else. When I wore it, I thought of Marty.
Marty had given me the helmet as a birthday gift after I got my first bike. I was living on my own at that time, and had come home for a family birthday party.
I don't know where Marty found the helmet. It was scarred and streaked with rust, the steel shell lined with nylon webbing and old foam which I had long ago replaced.
Marty had been having a bad day then, feeling a lot of pain, but as he sat in his wheelchair in the back yard and wished me happy birthday he was nothing but smiles. Aside from my wife and son Marty was the only person I was ever able to openly express my feelings with. I could say, "I love you, big bro," and Marty would grin and give me a slobbery kiss on the cheek. He did that when I was a kid too, and I caught hell for it in school.
Marty had held up his birthday present to me, the wrapping paper torn and held together with about a thousand strips of tape, the ribbon lopsided. I opened the package and took out the helmet.
My brother had pointed upward and said, "For you, Petey. To keep away the pink cloud."
I looked up at a cloudless blue sky. That was Marty for you.
Almost as an afterthought Marty said, "You can wear it on your motorbike too!"
And so I did. I got a lot of weird looks. This was before a lot of the retro bike helmets you see now became stylish. Fuck it. I wore it because my big bro gave it to me. Every so often out on the road I'd look up at the sky and wonder what the hell Marty had been talking about when he mentioned the pink cloud. Marty said a lot of weird shit.
A year ago I was running late on my way home from work. I was on my bike. It was a Friday evening, and I had to stop at a bank machine downtown for some cash to get us through the weekend.
I hopped off the bike and waited in line. When my turn came I pulled out three hundred in cash and turned to see a kid holding a gun on me.
The kid was an idiot. He was standing fifteen feet away and demanding my cash. He was standing on the sidewalk in full view of passing cars, and already I could see people on their cell phones, hopefully calling the cops.
I told the kid to calm down when a police cruiser came roaring around the corner. I turned my head and heard a bang and was rocked off my feet as if I had been hit with a sledgehammer.
The kid had panicked and pulled the trigger.
The bullet had left a dimple in the goofy steel helmet my brother had given me. The cops bagged the kid and made me sit tight until paramedics checked me out. I was fine. One of the cops later told me that if I hadn't been wearing that steel helmet, the gunshot probably would have blown my brains out.
A day later I called my mom and dad and told then what happened. They relayed the story to Marty and I could hear his gurgling laughter in the background through the entire call.
Life went on.
Marty died.
Now I'm in his room, going though his things. Mom and dad didn't ask me to, but they are hurting right now.
Marty and I shared this room, a long, long time ago. On the dresser beside the little TV and VCR is a model plane we built together. The decals are wrinkled and torn. Marty wanted to put them on. Our bunk bed had been replaced by a steel frame job from a medical supply house long ago.
I was going through a box of his things when I found a videotape. The black plastic case was grimy and worn, as if it had been in and out of Marty's VCR a thousand times.
Sitting in Marty's room I said, "What the hell, big bro?"
I put the VCR in his machine and hit play.
There was only about forty seconds of footage on the tape.
I saw a limousine coming down a road. A man in a suit waved to the crowd on one side of the road, a lady in a pink hat waved to the other side. The car passed behind a road sign, and when it reappeared, the man was shot in the head.
A pink cloud of brains and blood hovered over the man's head for just a moment before he slumped and the limousine sped away.
I rewound the tape and watched it again, and again. I had seen that footage before. Who hasn't?
Now I was seeing it through Marty's eyes.
And I wondered. Had he known, over a decade ago, what would happen to me at that bank machine? Or had he given me the steel helmet out of some silly childish fear of a deadly pink cloud that could, in his eyes, strike anyone at any time?
Did it really matter?
I was alive.
I looked around the empty room and said, "Thanks, big bro."
My brother's name was Marty. Marty was a retard. But he was also a really nice guy.
11.22.63
User Reviews
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2007-01-31 14:05:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-12 19:18:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i still dig this
great story telling
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-11 11:07:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I've seen this one before.
Is this PLAGIARIZED???
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2007-01-11 10:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-11-26 23:52:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Outstanding.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-11-26 23:00:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good stuff.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-26 13:00:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-24 08:49:11 (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
******
Well,look at this. Kinda is in the same class as Rob Berg: A Total Moron...
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2006-11-26 09:44:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff as always.
Submitted by GMCrayon (user info) at 2006-11-26 09:21:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very fucking good
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2006-11-26 01:22:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow.
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2006-11-25 19:07:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Back and to the left,,,,
Back and to the left,,,,
Back and to the left.
Submitted by Sweetdeviant (user info) at 2006-11-24 21:27:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-24 20:22:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Agreed, 100%, DCW. I should have cut that last line.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-11-24 19:10:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by comicbookguy (user info) at 2006-11-24 18:46:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome
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you is back!?!
woot!
also, damn good post, didn't like the extememly cheesy end line though.
Submitted by comicbookguy (user info) at 2006-11-24 18:46:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome
Submitted by CATT81 (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:45:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it's good to see stuff like this on uber. best post ever
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-11-24 14:25:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2006-11-24 12:25:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff. Very touching.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-24 11:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-24 08:49:11 (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
--
My own personal stalker couldn't resist the temptation.
Hahaha!
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-24 08:49:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2006-11-24 05:51:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well... I *did* cry.
Im still crying.
You're a brilliant bastard - but dont make me cry next time... Next time, make me laugh.
Submitted by r1nce (user info) at 2006-11-23 23:00:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Time and time again.
Submitted by Newty (user info) at 2006-11-23 15:13:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that was brilliantly written
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2006-11-23 14:48:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are an excellent writer. A lot of your stuff reminds me of the best of Stephen King's short stories--bittersweet slices of life laced through with sadness and horror (and occasionally the supernatural). Great work!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-11-23 09:58:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I loved it. I had a friend with a brother like Marty and this really did bring a tear to my eye. Wonderful.
Submitted by mynameisandy (user info) at 2006-11-23 09:43:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm lost for words. Seriously.
Submitted by Mike-Mc (user info) at 2006-11-23 09:12:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excuse the swearing but that was fucking excellent +2 , and sorry to hear about your bro .
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-23 09:00:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate you soooooooooooooooo much.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2006-11-23 07:43:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BEST POST ON UBER FOR A LONG WHILE!
Didn't want to read this when I saw the title. Then I saw it was Jack and though I'd give it a scan. The word retard drew me in.
By the end I was nearly in tears.
Not quite, but nearly.
I wish I could +10 this story. Spot on.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-23 05:03:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And HOLY SHIT ALERT ETS THAT'S FUCKING T-1000 ON THE LEFT THERE.
*CONSPIRACY ALERT*
*CONSPIRACY ALERT*
*CONSPIRACY ALERT*
*CONSPIRACY ALERT*
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-23 05:02:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Firstly, I avoided reading this for a fair while because the title "Pink Cloud", by you particularly, convinced me it would be a well-researched but fear-based rant against gay emigration into the US.
Secondly, that is actually a photo of JFK eating a huge mass of tomato pasta with his hands.
Thirdly, this story was lovely.
Submitted by Tony_the_Tiger_is_a_Pedophile (user info) at 2006-11-23 03:34:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bullshit aside, this is one of the best things ive read in a long, long time.
Submitted by Aesthetic (user info) at 2006-11-22 23:02:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-22 20:07:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw, I love retarded people. Mostly.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-22 19:47:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2006-11-22 19:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good.
Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2006-11-22 18:22:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good read
Submitted by RPharazon (user info) at 2006-11-22 18:13:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This gave me the shivers.
Submitted by Cracked_out_cali (user info) at 2006-11-22 18:12:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Back and to the Left."
Awesome story. Unfortunately I scrolled down to the picture before reading it.
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2006-11-22 18:06:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very nice thank you
Submitted by andkorn (user info) at 2006-11-22 17:34:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2006-11-22 17:03:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bravo.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2006-11-22 16:15:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i like your shorter stories
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2006-11-22 16:11:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well done.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-11-22 15:13:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:57:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. Just Wow.
You gots talent, son.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:54:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was REALLY good...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:54:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pretty cool
Submitted by mr-bee (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:29:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:25:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:13:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You get the drumstick AND the wishbone for this.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:10:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-11-22 14:04:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by LadyJay (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:29:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
simply great.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Perspective is a funny thing.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:23:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I could guess from the title. Good story
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:18:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ahumblefool (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:17:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Love your work Jack. Another homerun.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:15:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I have had this story in mind for YEARS, but every time I tried to write the tning I fucked it up. Hopefully I got it this time.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-22 13:14:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*repost - resized picture*