"God loves the French" and several other phrases you will never hear.... (926 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Scott James (View user info) at 2006-11-23 15:51:10 EST
- "Why yes, darling, I think it would be a splendid idea if you invited those two hookers to join us for a foursome."
- "I'm not here for small talk, my dear. I would just like to eat well, have a few glasses of wine, fuck you until you bleed and never call you again after tonight."
- "To hell with cocaine and heroin; from now on I'm going to get my kicks killing prostitutes and strippers."
- "I'm sorry, darling, but it just isn't big enough. Try your fist instead."
- "I want a handsome man who is not as smart as me with a huge cock and enough money so that I never need work again."
- "No, darling, it doesn't bother me in the slightest that you scratch your arse and sniff your fingers afterwards."
- "I don't want to die without being raped."
- "I haven't killed anyone since before breakfast."
- "Goddamn, momma, if you and I don't fuck soon, I'm going to have to get my daughter drunk again."
- "I've sucked more dicks than you've had hot dinners."
- "I like going to the VD clinic."
- "Darling, that was amazing! You fuck just like my father!"
- "David Copperfield makes me wet."
- "I once got caught masturbating to Whoopi Goldberg in 'Jumping Jack Flash'"
- "I'm tired, darling. Why don't you invite my sister over and you can fuck her instead."
- "I wish I was a child molester."
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Happy Thanksgiving.
User Reviews
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-11-24 09:29:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
There's a possum in my house right now. I shit you not.
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-24 08:49:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by jojo747 (user info) at 2006-11-24 02:11:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
man, this is awful.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-11-24 02:06:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
God loves me...look at me!
LAWL!
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-24 01:04:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am saying all of these tomorrow to random strangers. JUST TO PROOVE YOU WRONG.
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2006-11-23 23:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is the sound of a man trying too hard
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2006-11-23 23:06:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-23 22:04:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"I want a handsome man who is not as smart as me with a huge cock and enough money so that I never need work again."
===
Actually, there are plenty of women who say this all the time..if only to themselves.
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2006-11-23 21:19:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by FreshPrince (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:34:12 (#)
Ranking: 1
"I haven't killed anyone since before breakfast."
Sorry to burst your bubble, but I've heard that one.
________________________________
...?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-23 20:04:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
C
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:42:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It does sound similar to a line uttered by Mad Dog Tannen in BTTF Part 3 but apart from that I can't think of where you might have heard it. I was going to go with "raped" rather than killed, but I didn't want to come off as sounding sex-obsessed.
Submitted by FreshPrince (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:34:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"I haven't killed anyone since before breakfast."
Sorry to burst your bubble, but I've heard that one.
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:23:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Harhar!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:14:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
~Oathmeal approved~
WHOOPS FORGOT TO LOG OUT
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:03:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually, I read it again, and for "I wish I was a child molester." you get a +2, because no one will EVER say that.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2006-11-23 19:00:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was so fucking terrible I can't stop laughing. I'm not sure I understand it but you get a -2 anyways.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-23 18:57:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2006-11-23 17:21:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
here is one that WAS heard, from an aussie female politician, who had been chatting to some of her constituents - rev heads with their souped up cars
observing their tyres, she said dismissively: "i've had more rubber up my cunt"
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-23 17:07:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:39:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Hand me that piano."
"Boy, I'm in the mood for a root canal."
"Baby, I like a 3-inch dick."
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:36:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:12:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
i hope you choke on your brother's dick jake.
*******
What the hell is a dick jake?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:27:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I want a handsome man who is not as smart as me with a huge cock and enough money so that I never need work again."
(This message was funded by the Mrs. Jeff Laben Appreciation Society, Ford, Merck Pharmaceuticals, and Viewers Like You.)
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:13:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I want a handsome man who is not as smart as me with a huge cock and enough money so that I never need work again."
hahahahahaha
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:13:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "Why yes, darling, I think it would be a splendid idea if you invited those two hookers to join us for a foursome."
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We've all said this
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:12:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i hope you choke on your brother's dick jake.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:12:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I once got caught masturbating to Whoopi Goldberg in 'Jumping Jack Flash'"
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Even Noonie hasn't done this
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:10:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I'm not here for small talk, my dear. I would just like to eat well, have a few glasses of wine, fuck you until you bleed and never call you again after tonight."
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Re-post this as 'things Noonie says inbetween biting innocents'
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:10:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
God loves the French was only really good one.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:10:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I like going to the VD clinic."
UNCANNY
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:09:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I don't want to die without being raped."
Her again
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:09:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "Darling, that was amazing! You fuck just like my father!"
Noonie again
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:09:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- "I've sucked more dicks than you've had hot dinners."
Pretty sure Noonie has said that
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-23 16:08:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-11-23 15:52:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
You had me at God loves the French
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2006-11-23 15:52:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You had me at God loves the French